Daily Notifications
Sign up for free emails to receive the feature story every morning in your inbox at


Scientology is turning Larry Hagman’s house into a drunk tank for celebs

NarcononOjaiWell, Mike Rinder called it, and on Friday night, Scientology leader David Miscavige confirmed it: After purchasing the hilltop Ojai estate of Larry Hagman from the actor’s widow last year, the church will be turning the place into a drug rehab clinic for celebrities who need to dry out.

That was one of several announcements made by Miscavige as he held forth on Friday night’s annual International Association of Scientologists gala in a big tent on the grounds of Saint Hill Manor, the church’s UK headquarters and L. Ron Hubbard’s home from 1959 to 1966.

The church claimed that 7,500 of its members attended Friday night’s event, which we’re pretty sure is larger than the tent’s actual occupancy, but we’ll just have to take Scientology’s word for it. On Saturday night, the annual Patron’s Ball was held to honor the organization’s biggest donors, and we have reason to believe that Tom Cruise attended and showed off his Freedom Medal of Valor.

Judging by photographs posted to Scientology’s Facebook page, Miscavige, 54, looked healthy and sported a slightly higher pompadour than usual…



We enjoyed this quote put out by the church…

[Miscavige] remarked that Scientology is “the only movement transcending every national, cultural and demographic barrier… and that’s not even counting what we transcend in terms of physical universe space and time.”

Well, when your movement is crashing in statistics here on this plane of existence, we suppose it’s some comfort to count other planets in your enrollment figures.

Miscavige loves to reveal new expansion plans for the assembled multitudes, and this time he bragged on how he’s planning to construct new Advanced Orgs, such as this one which he claims will spring up outside Sydney…


Will he actually build the thing? [UPDATE: The building exists, so this would be another of Scientology’s expensive renovation jobs, which have a tendency to stall.] He’s already proven that he’ll pour millions into projects whether they’re needed or not. But recent events that we’ve covered make it absolutely plain that the existing Advanced Orgs in Los Angeles and Clearwater, Florida are already going through upheavals because they’re both starving for business.

A new Advanced Org in Australia, which has only about 2,000 members on the entire continent? This is like Blockbuster announcing that it’s going to open new superstores that will stock both DVDs and VHS tapes.

However, while we’re very skeptical that such a monstrosity will ever be built, we have no doubt that Scientologists around the world will soon be under intense pressure to donate money towards its cost.

Miscavige’s other big reveal was the announcement of a network of new “Ideal Narconons.” News of the “Ideal” rehab clinics has been leaking out for some time, and now we get some nice images to put with some locations.

The new “continental” Narconons will be located near Pretoria, Sydney, Mexico City, Toronto, and in East Sussex and Denmark. But the jewel in the crown will be the hilltop drunk tank for celebs in Ojai…


Most glaringly missing from that list, of course, is the facility that was Narconon’s jewel, its flagship operation in Oklahoma, Narconon Arrowhead. As we showed earlier, Narconon Arrowhead is on the verge of collapse, and numerous lawsuits, some filed in the wake of recent patient deaths at the facility, have probably doomed the place. And, as readers of this website know, the other American Narconons are vulnerable, with dozens of lawsuits cropping up as a result of the rehab network’s deceptive practices.

So here, apparently, is a way to wipe the slate clean. Narconon’s focus will go to a few expensive large facilities in foreign countries, and a fancy joint outside LA which will cater to actors and actresses and other people who might be less apt to sue the joint.

Also on the slate Friday night were this year’s Freedom Medal winners…


Here’s what Scientology had to say about them…

The IAS Freedom Medal for 2014 was bestowed upon three exemplary Scientologists: Vlastimil Spalek, a Czech “cyclorunner” who crisscrossed his nation by bike and on foot, spearheading a Truth About Drugs movement to ultimately halt spiraling drug abuse in the Czech Republic; Maria Lara, an exquisite Colombian actress who energetically used the common-sense values of The Way to Happiness to galvanize industries and military personnel in five nations; and Kate Ceberano, the Australian musical superstar who for some three decades has tirelessly championed Scientology as a humanitarian voice for freedom.

Woo-hoo! This planet will be cleared in no time!


Posted by Tony Ortega on October 20, 2014 at 08:00

E-mail your tips and story ideas to or follow us on Twitter. We post behind-the-scenes updates at our Facebook author page. Here at the Bunker we try to have a post up every morning at 7 AM Eastern (Noon GMT), and on some days we post an afternoon story at around 2 PM. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Learn about Scientology with our numerous series with experts…

BLOGGING DIANETICS (We read Scientology’s founding text) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25

UP THE BRIDGE (Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48

GETTING OUR ETHICS IN (Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14

SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING (Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49

PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | Scientology’s Private Dancer
The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ


Share Button
Print Friendly, PDF & Email