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Independent Scientology: The Ballad of Captain Bill

Bill Robertson

Bill Robertson

In 1990, author Jon Atack published what is still one of the very best books on L. Ron Hubbard and Scientology, A Piece of Blue Sky. Atack now has a new edition of the book out, and it reminded us what an encyclopedic resource he is. So join us as we rely on Jon’s expertise to sift through the legends, myths, and contested facts about Scientology that tend to get hashed and rehashed in books, articles, and especially on the Internet.

Jon, a big part of the current Scientology story is the large breakaway group of “independents” who have left the official church but still adhere to the ideas of founder L. Ron Hubbard. Church leader David Miscavige most definitely perceives these “indies” as a big threat, and it seems like this is the most significant schism the church has ever experienced.

But there were previous groups of Scientologists who left the church to form their own independent groups, and they formed practically from the beginning, when Hubbard got things going in the early 1950s. Before the present indie scene, probably the biggest breakaway happened in the early 1980s, isn’t that right?

JON: Ron Howes* grew new teeth in the fifties, and many left to join Amprinistics in protest at “heavy ethics” in the sixties, but about half the membership left between ’82 and ’84, somewhere over ten thousand people. Most continued for at least a little while, encouraged by the significantly lower cost and the friendly atmosphere. There was no central organization, but groups formed around David Mayo (more about him next week) and a man named Bill Robertson.

[*Howes also was the inventor of the Easy-Bake Oven, and died in 2010 at 83. Adds Atack: “The first major splinter group formed around Ron Howes, who claimed that with Dianetics he had grown new teeth (he didn’t say where he’d grown them, and if I know anything about the Tech it was probably in an embarrassing place).”]

“Free Zone” has been adopted as a catch-all phrase to describe Independent Scientologists, but it actually traces back to Robertson. There have been some eccentric characters in Scientology, but the most thoroughly eccentric must have been “Captain Bill.”

Bill Robertson left a biker gang to gang up with Ron Hubbard. He was a member of the original Sea Project, which transmuted into the Sea Organization. Dispatched to clean up the sexual shenanigans at the Los Angeles Org in the late 60’s, Bill determined that an alien invasion was imminent, and after a hard day’s work, the crew spent the night on the roof, watching for space ships. He decided that two psychiatrists in LA were the root cause of all of mankind’s ills, and personally chased them out of town.

Bill earned sea-captain’s papers so that he could take charge of the Sea Org flagship, the Apollo. He was made “Second Deputy Commodore”: if Hubbard and his wife Mary Sue were incapacitated, Bill would be the head of Scientology. When the flagship landed in 1975, he formed the Sea Org Marching Chorus, with songs uncannily like Hubbard’s own “Thank-you for Listening” (“You’re supposed to eat vegetables, not listen to them” according to White Dwarf’s review). Captain Bill designed colourful banners and new uniforms. Come 1981, having risen to the top of Scientology in the Commodore’s Messenger Org, he was busted along with the public parts of the Guardian’s Office, and was the last but one member of the old guard in power (Norman Starkey, before you ask, was also in the CMO).

It was from Bill that I took my prestigious title, Chairman of the OT Committee UK, back in 1983, although I didn’t realize at the time that I was supposed to believe in Marcabians (an invader force from the Marcab Confederacy — as Hubbard put it: “Various planets united into a very vast civilization which has come forward up through the last 200,000 years, formed out of the fragments of earlier civilizations. In the last 10,000 years they have gone on with a sort of decadent kicked-in-the-head civilization that contains automobiles, business suits, fedora hats, telephones, spaceships — a civilization which looks almost an exact duplicate but is worse off than the current US civilization”). I saw Bill relatively often while he was in East Grinstead. He was deeply upset that I rejected the “Tech,” and came often for tea and conversation. He once told me that he’d seen Hubbard do two things that would put anyone off Scientology, but he would never tell me quite what. As he told me a number of other things that would have put me off, I suspect that they were sexual misdemeanors on Hubbard’s part.

Bill told me that after he was expelled and declared “Suppressive,” in 1981, he locked himself in a wardrobe for a week. His “space” had shrunk so much. He gradually acclimatised to larger spaces and telepathic messages from Elron Elray (!) streaming in from the ether. (Before he’d been kicked out, Bill had been assigned to get Hubbard’s screenplay for OT III filmed, and had guessed that the character slyly disguised as Rawl was the Old Man himself. This was apparently his inspiration for Elron Elray.)

I was privileged to know Bill and, in its first incarnation, my history A Piece of Blue Sky centered on his Free Zone — a new Scientology, but organized in independent cells, without a central and vulnerable hierarchy. Bill said that the Church of Scientology had been taken over by the FBI.

Bill received messages from the “Mothership,” as the Sector Operations Bulletins (or S.O.B.s, I suppose). Several of these were handwritten, the hand uncannily like Hubbard’s own rounded scrawl (called “cloning” by some cult experts). The Sector Operations Bulletins tell the invidious story of the invasion of Earth by the Marcabians, to whose existence we were first alerted by an obscure L. Ron Hubbard tape. According to the S.O.B.s, 200,000 Marcabians had already landed in Switzerland. They used Transcendental Meditation as a front and worked through the Freemasons. They were going to severely affect the price of gold in the coming months to gain leverage on international markets. After that, their takeover would be very swift.

Bill stayed in East Grinstead for about eight months. He several times tried to persuade me back into the fold, but I’d shifted from believer to historian within weeks of resigning the cult. Even so, we remained on good terms, and he had some interesting stories to add to my burgeoning collection.

One day, in the autumn of 1984, I found Bill’s girlfriend in tears in my kitchen, talking to my wife. She explained that they had never had a sexual relationship, but that almost every Saturday, they would travel to London, where she would buy dresses, shoes and accessories in Bill’s fairly large size. He was heavy set and 6’4″ and still preferred the Harley Davidson over other forms of transport. At eight o’clock, he transformed into Astar Paremjian, recipient of the S.O.B.s, and would stand in front of the mirror, preened and prepped for her lover. Elron Elray stayed firmly on the Mothership, however.

THE BUNKER: Wait a minute. You’re saying that Bill’s girlfriend told you he dressed in women’s clothing to receive messages from outer space, and hoping for an incarnation of L. Ron Hubbard to appear?

JON: You seem to think there’s something unusual in that, which is really something, given the years you’ve spent studying the cult. Bill’s gospel spread far and wide. Swathes of the German and Russian “independent” movement were germinated by Bill. He also introduced super complex variants on the Upper Levels. He figured that the existing levels had to be expanded to include not just the self, but all the “Dynamics,” and the whole of the Organizing Board used to administer Scientology. This multiplied each level — by eight for the Dynamics and then by seven for the Divisions of the Org Board (also borrowed from the Galactic Confederation of OT III): which could give as many as 448 OT levels.

Eventually, so I’m told, a tumor started to block Bill’s throat, and rather than having a simple operation, he chose the auditing route, and suffocated to death before reaching his sixtieth birthday. There is at least one moral in this story.

I have happy memories of demonstrating outside Saint Hill, with Bill waving a placard and yelling, “Auditing not Frauditing!” Let’s hope that if his belief in reincarnation is true, he’s been reborn into a more tolerant setting, where it’s OK to dress in whatever clothes you like, without having to join a wacky cult first.

THE BUNKER: We’re going to supplement this lesson with some things to watch and listen to. This first video is a well known example of Bill Robertson in action. We found this description at a Free Zone website:

The Meeting at Crown Hotel in East Grinstead 1983 was the introduction of the Free Zone and New Civilization Game. Capt. Bill Robertson went there after he left the Church of Scientology to lecture about it to Scientologists who either left the church already or who were waiting for an alternative. Shortly after the the meeting started, David Gaiman*, former Guardian for Public Relations, came in and wanted to say a few words to the audience in order to keep them in the Church and loyal to the RTC. He talked about his SP declares, how he made it back into “good standing” with the new rulers. The crowd got furious when they asked what to do and he answered “communicate.” Then Capt. Bill stepped in and said his version.

(*Neil’s dad.)

 
As you can see, Bill was quite animated. He also wrote and sang songs. We have an example of that in his anthem for the “Galactic Patrol.” We created a slideshow for the song at the Voice in 2011. Get a load of Bill’s pipes!

 
Jon mentioned that Hubbard spoke about the Marcab Confederacy in a lecture, and we tracked down the one he’s referring to. It’s a portion of a talk called ‘Create and Confront,” recorded on January 3, 1960, and it was part of the State of Man Congress. In it, Hubbard talks about his days as a series of suicidal race car drivers over a 10,000-year period that began about 30,000 years ago. It’s really something…

 

———————

HERE COMES THE REG! HERE COMES THE REG!

Karen de la Carriere and Tory Christman appearing together? Wow. And this is fun. Karen is role-playing the patter of an annoying “reg” (short for registrar), trying to get money out of Tory. Give it a look!

 

———————

SMERSH Madness: The FINAL FOUR!

As we announced on March 1, we’re joining bracket fever with a tournament like no other. It’s up to you to decide who should be named the new SMERSH, the traditional nemesis of Scientology. Cast your vote for who’s doing more to propel the church down its long slide into oblivion!

FinalFourBracket

Here’s our second Final Four matchup, between the winners of the Diana bracket — WhyWeProtest.net — and Operation Clambake, the champ of the Freewinds bracket.

WWPVsOCMB

WhyWeProtest.net is an online forum for the Anonymous anti-Scientology program, Project Chanology. Wild and woolly, the site became less about the worldwide protests that started in 2008 and more about the research being done by scores of vigilant Internet sleuths. Like any forum, its cast of characters is always changing, but document releases seem to have been particularly good in recent months. (Previously: WWP defeated Anderson Cooper in the first round, Paul Haggis in the Sweet Sixteen, and David Miscavige in the Diana bracket final.)

Operation Clambake, or Xenu.net, was started by a Norwegian engineer, Andreas Heldal-Lund, in 1996. It quickly became a major nemesis for the church as it hosted vast amounts of damaging information that Scientology wants kept quiet. It’s still a great resource today for researchers. (Previously: OCMB defeated Lisa Marie Presley in the first round, Jon Atack in the Sweet Sixteen, and Mark Bunker in the Freewinds bracket final.)

 
PLEASE NOTE: At 7 am on March 31 — 24 hours after this post went up — Operation Clambake was leading WWP by two votes. At that point, we made the official call and Clambake went on to the final match. Since that time, WWP gained many more votes on the poll, which remains active. That’s led to some questions over at WWP, and we understand that. But we had to call the contest at the 24-hour mark, and at that point OCMB had the edge. Therefore, Clambake is the official winner of this match. — T.O.

 
——————-

Posted by Tony Ortega on March 30, 2013 at 07:00

 

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  • 10oriocookies

    First off i would like to thank my kids for getting me up at 6am because they are so excited it is Easter TOMORROW.
    Second, i would like to thank caffeine, I Love You!
    Third, i would like to thank Bill Robertson for being bat shit crazy and making my crazy morning seem totally normal.
    Tony, thanks pal.

    • richelieu jr

      You seem pretty sure it’s not caffeine that got your kids up at that hour.. Check their cereal ingredients…

      • 10oriocookies

        Caffeine got me up. Had to mainline some or face the wife waking up before her time on “sleep in” day. The morning gets better. As I was pouring cereal into the bowls I noticed that the cereal was infused with ants. Of course they scattered, like all good ants do, and I was forced to sweep them into the garbage disposal. I just had to laugh…

        • richelieu jr

          When I first went to university, the airline lost my luggage so I arrived with less than a dollar in my pocket and no clothes or bedclothes… I splurged the rest of my pocket change on a brownie in the candy machine, carefully only ate half so I’d have something to eat the next day and collapsed my hard dorm-room bed. The next day I woke FAMISHED! I have never been so starved and I hungrily shoved the brownie into my mouth… I must gave slept wrong, I thought, as ly arm and hand and even face was tingling like it does when your leg falls asleep. I staggered into the bathroom to drink some water, turned on the light and looked in the mirror and SCREAMED!

          THERE WERE HUNDREDS OF ANTS CRAWLING OUT OF MY MOUTH? ALL OVER MY FACE AND DOWN MY ARM!!!!!

          That feeling was real insects because the dorm had an ant problem and they had sought out my brownie, which I then proceeded to shove in my gob! I didn’t even have a toothbrush let alone toothpaste.

          A very very bad start to the day….

          So, I hoipe this has put your lousy day a liyylr in perspective

          • 10oriocookies

            I feel better now!!

          • Sounds like my fist morning at the manor hotel, before it became celebrity centre. Except it was roaches, and I didn’t have a brownie. Shudder.

            • Observer

              Ewww!

            • When I was in the sea org in Los Angeles in the late 70s I would spend about 10 percent of my weekly pay on one Cadbury mocha chocolate bar to have as a treat while I spent most of the rest doing my laundry at the ‘mat on Vermont.

          • Missionary Kid

            Wouldn’t it be worse if you woke up a $cientologist again?

          • Ze Moo

            That is one nasty engram. Do ants or brownies cause restimulation?

          • i-Betty

            Oh. My. GOD! I don’t know whether to laugh or cry!

          • ParticleMom

            That is horrifying. I’d be scarred for life!

    • Patty Moher

      I think we may be related. LOL

    • CoolHand

      I only got to 1:57 in the first video and had to stop where Bill starts talking about knowing Ron for thousands of years or whatever. Then I only got to 1:37 on the Galactic Patrol song. I started to smell polyester listening to it and couldn’t go on. As crazy as Bill was, I only got to :39 on Hubbard’s lunacy right after he said The Brotherhood of the Snake race shows up on everybody’s case! So, crazy is as crazy does.

      Of course I made it all the way through Tori and Karen. It’s funny to laugh at all those reg cycles now, but man, they were painful!

      • 10oriocookies

        Speaking of painful, its very painful to see and hear yourself on TV. What a trip eh?

        • CoolHand

          Yeah, we’re definitely our own biggest critics. Next week will be REALLY painful (but much more so for them because of the truth that will be exposed to millions).

          • sugarplumfairy

            I saw you guys for a few minutes at the end of last night’s Rock Center.. You both looked and sounded great!!

            • elar aitch

              ooooh – must have video link

            • Missionary Kid

              It was only the teaser at the end of the show for next week’s show, at the very end of the show. Both the guys looked and sounded great, self-assured, and calm. They’ll blow NARCOCRAP out of the water.

              I’ll bet that Brian Williams has a segment on the regular nightly news next Friday.

            • sugarplumfairy

              Their show airs next Friday.. Last night was just a trailer for next week’s show.. So you didn’t miss anything..

              And hey! good to see you!

          • BuryTheNuts2

            GO TEAM!!!!!

          • Missionary Kid

            You don’t have to be your own biggest critics, because you looked and sounded great to all us wogs. You both looked self-assured and straight. The important thing is that you looked entirely credible.

            Any NARCOCRAP officials are going to look flat out sleazy. You know the drill: They’ll give a statement somewhat like, “These two are disaffected former employees who were fired because they’re no good liars.”

            From what Ive heard, you have documentation to back up your stories. Knock ’em dead.

        • Missionary Kid

          Both you and Luke looked calm, cool, credible, handsome, locked, loaded, and primed to put the chocks to NARCOCRAP.

          Just remember that how we see ourselves in our minds and how we actually look on TV or even in the mirror is different. To a wog, you guys looked and sounded fantastic, and that’s the people you want to reach to put Arrowhead out of business.

      • Letaba

        That’s a coincidence – I blew the first clip at exactly the same place. Thank God, I’m free from that brand of cognitive dissonance. Never believed that crap at the time but had to keep a happy face in the course room.

      • I couldn’t deal with Captain Bill, but I listened to all of Ron’s aimless blathering about the Marcabian race-track. Who were those people listening, and what did they think was funny?

        • monkeyknickers

          He was guest speaker at a Matchbox Car convention.

      • Guest

        Shit it was painful for me to relive it ..12 years later! DAMN they Suck big time! I agree, CoolHand. ((But don’t ya think it does show s/one who’s never experienced that how it really goes down?”

        Ok, my two cents: #1) I protest Gerry losing. Joe Childs and Tom Tobin would *never* be
        running the stories they do if it weren’t for Gerry sticking his neck
        out——–many, many years ago. He should AT THE LEAST get a “Honorary
        FOUNDING FATHER Award”. I love what Joe and Tom have done, don’t get me
        wrong….but Gerry losing?meeeeeeeoooooooooowwwwww. I wanted to see
        Gerry Vs David Miscavige!

        #2) WWP vs OCMB? Oh my Gawd! Again…BOTH have been equally historic in different ways,

        but VERY VERY Key ways for sure. :::Sigh::: Truth is: we’re ALL winners in this game 🙂
        And Davey boy? Tick Tock, Tock Tock….:)

        Love to ALL and Happy Easter!! 🙂 Tory/Magoo

      • Yes! I agree, CoolHand!! Shit it was painful for me to relive it ..12 years later! DAMN they Suck big
        time! ((But don’t ya think it does show s/one who’s
        never experienced that how it really goes down?”

        Ok, my two cents: #1) I protest Gerry losing. Joe Childs and Tom Tobin would *never* be
        running the stories they do if it weren’t for Gerry sticking his neck
        out——–many, many years ago. He should AT THE LEAST get a “Honorary
        FOUNDING FATHER Award”. I love what Joe and Tom have done, don’t get me
        wrong….but Gerry losing?meeeeeeeoooooooooowwwwww. I wanted to see
        Gerry Vs David Miscavige!

        #2) WWP vs OCMB? Oh my Gawd! Again…BOTH have been equally historic in different ways,

        but VERY VERY Key ways for sure. :::Sigh::: Truth is: we’re ALL winners in this game 🙂
        And Davey boy? Tick Tock, Tock Tock….:Time is on **our** Side!!

        Love to ALL and Happy Easter!! 🙂 Tory/Magoo

    • i-Betty

      LOL!

  • Captain Howdy

    Remember, a vote for Why We Protest is a VOTE for ANONYMOUS

    And none of us would even be here if it wasn’t for ANONYMOUS

    • Roger Larsson

      Andreas has a baking oven and Anonymous have the raw material (clam flour) to make a tasty cake of. It’s a chicken egg question. Maybe Tom Cruise is the owner of the vote?

      • Captain Howdy

        I more or less agree with you on the TC thing Roger. And I do realize there was an anti-Cof$ scene before Anon, but they were lonely voices crying in a remote wilderness of pain. Anon made sure their cries were heard.

        • Roger Larsson

          Operating Thetans don’t exist, Operating Environments exist.

    • jensting

      You – maybe not. Tony and a few others – perhaps 😉

      • The Usenet newsgroup alt.religion.scientology was founded on July 17, 1991 and became a powerhouse of Scientology criticism. Without it the Church of Scientology would have not been the subject of scathing exposure.

        All empires wax and wane, but even in its dotage, a.r.s. is still a forum for exchange of information about the devious, bullying and malevolent cult.

        Of course new forums, such as web pages, message boards and blogs are far more important nowadays, but history should be remembered and acknowledged.

        Andrew

    • richelieu jr

      “And none of us would even be here if it wasn’t for ANONYMOUS”

      Wait–Who are you again?

    • Trustmeonthis

      Maybe you wouldn’t. I was here long before joining WWP.

      • Captain Howdy

        And who was listening to you do tell?

  • My first reaction was that Tony had mixed up the dates and thought it was April 1. But then remembering what I already knew about Captain Bill with his exotic ideas making Ron’s OT levels seem almost normal, I merely sighed.

    We Robertsons, are all lineal descendants of the Celtic Earls of Atholl, whose progenitor was King Duncan I, eldest son of Malcolm II and though we share the same genes and the same clan tartan are a disparate bunch. Perhaps when I get older and more eccentric I may well go searching shoe stores for silver boots.

    With his exotic clothes sense, Bill should have emigrated to Canada and become a lumberjack.

    ‘I cut down trees, I skip and jump
    I like to press wildflowers
    I put on women’s clothing
    And hang around in bars
    ………………..

    I cut down trees, I wear high heels
    Suspenders and a bra
    I wish I’d been a girlie
    Just like my dear papa’

    Attrib. M Python

    Andrew

    Clan Motto: Virtutis gloria merces
    Clan War cry: Garg ‘nuair dhùisgear

    • sugarplumfairy

      You’re going to get MORE eccentric???

      • Captain Howdy

        Andrew isn’t eccentric, it’s a middle earthiness thing. He lives on an Island swarming with wombats and great white sharks way, way, way out there in the middle of nowhere and he’s my guru, maaaaaan.

        • … and also kiwis, a timid, short sighted and flightless nocturnal bird with no ability to defend itself against predators. So we made it our national symbol.

          But we do have some cute bugs. This is a giant weta and be very careful if one gets tangled up in your hair so you don’t harm it when you try to remove it:

          http://static.stuff.co.nz/1351756050/909/7895909.jpg

          Andrew

          • Sherbet

            Ew, Andrew, make it go away!!

          • BuryTheNuts2

            I bet that sucker would be yummy, battered and fried!

          • wow – that is kind of beautiful …and for some reason ..it looks like it tastes good ( like a lobster or something ) i lived in Aussie land for a bit but i never made it to NZ…i really regret it . Every kiwi i have ever met i have really liked . If i ever go ..i am sure i will run into you at a coffee shop checking this blog 😉

        • Scientia

          A land where you get respect for running down a possum with your car and even more for putting the roadkill into a pie. Love it!! 🙂

        • sizzle8

          That’s no weta, that’s a Marcabian.

      • richelieu jr

        Personally, I’ not wealthy enough to be eccentric.. I’m just nuts…

        • Observer

          But you’re the *good* kind of nuts.

        • sugarplumfairy

          Never insult yourself.. That’s what WE’re here for..

        • Missionary Kid

          May we all have some of that nuttiness!!

        • I am neurotic… mental health problems for sophisticated folks. BTW, not kidding.

          • richelieu jr

            Neurotics Unite!

            Something tells me there are a lot of neurotics in Scientology and freshly out f it….

            • It’s better to be psycho. You are not aware of it, and it sounds like more fun. The Scientology neurotics are the product of one very psychotic man. It looks like Bill Robertson was, unfortunately as psycho as his mentor 🙁 I could only handle (heh) a couple of minutes of his rantings. LRH’s recording was just as mad… but he was such an affable lunatic. His long pauses made it seem like he was making it up as he went… yeah, I saw “The Master” 😉

            • Dyslexics Untie!

              Study tech can help you.

              Andrew

        • FistOfXenu

          Careful man, don’t let BTN get you or you’ll be 6 ft under. 🙂

      • BuryTheNuts2

        That same thought crossed my mind as I read his post!

      • FistOfXenu

        Just what I was wondering.

    • Bella Legosi

      Oh how i love the sound of Monty Python….always look on the bright side of life ey?

    • You beat me to the Monty Python analogy, I was actually thinking more along the Hell’s Grannies sketch when I imagined Captain Bill on his Harley

      http://youtu.be/Ygy7UDADXDg

    • sister wendy

      He is SO suited to the Lumberjack song! That is perfect.

  • richelieu jr

    There’s another ‘Captain’, over on Marty’s “We’re not $cilons but Nice Little Hubbardites” boards, that they keep citing to prove that Hubbard really was ‘the greatest office I(sic) ever saw!”…

    I so wish I were kidding- they use his word to outweigh Wright’s entire research, in particular… Anybody know his name and why his word is so important (other than being the only evidence anybody can come up with for Ron’s confabulations? Seriously, one guy couldn’t even remember his name, yet said he ‘seemed completely credible’ he “could see no reason why he would lie”(?!!) and was definitely willing to take his word ofr it..

    he must have been wearing one snazzy uniform!

    • Observer

      His word is so important because it’s telling them what they want to hear.

      • Captain Howdy

        Craziness is contagious. Look at Bill’s eyes. Charles Manson (who Johnny Rotten copied) has those eyes.

      • Casabeca

        Your comments are spot on!

  • FLUNK_101

    In the 70’s, I had a friend who was a Combat Air Special Forces (CASF) Vietnam Vet who came home and joined the Sea Org.
    He was highly intelligent. He was also a trained killer who, back in Nam, had killed from afar with high tech weapons, as well as up close and personal with his bare hands.
    He was in the Sea Org with Captain Bill. He bragged about that, and what a “heavy cat” Captain Bill was.
    He told me so many stories about him! Once, my friend had to paint Captain Bill’s office. He never asked Captain Bill to leave the room. He just went right ahead and the started painting the ceiling above Captian Bill ‘s head while he worked at his desk! It was a bold move, because he knew he’d be in big trouble if he got so much as a drop of paint on the Captain. 
    He said that the ship was once in the wrong position at the dock, and that Captain Bill got so mad that he moved the ship with his mind … that the entire ship suddenly shifted laterally into the right position.
    My Vietnam veteran friend was also heavy into space opera and the whole track. He said he knew wear he’d parked his old spaceship from a past life, and someday he was gonna go get it. (He said it was parked in hyperspace.)
    This guy was one of my best friends. He was great to hang out with over coffee … the storytelling never ended. 
    But, just beneath the surface, there was something immeasurable sad about this guy. As smart as he was, he was completely unemployable. He complained that, as a special forces “elite warrior”, he should be a modern day celebrity, just like the elite warriors of ancient times.
    He worked on and off, until one day he blew his brains out.
    He was a dear friend, and I am crying as I type this.

    • sugarplumfairy

      another hubbard victim..

      • well …and war . War might have had something to do with it 😉 My dad was in Vietnam …when he got back he worked for the forest service fighting fires …pretty much lived in a tree house for a year to get his head back on straight. I can’t imagine having to deal with that AND scientology cray cray at the same time .

        • Captain Howdy

          My dad was in WWII (Merchant Marines in the S.P) and the Korean War as a tank Sgt,. and when he got drunk sometimes he would start crying and tell me about the guy he had to kill in hand to hand combat. And every Vietnam vet I’ve ever known was messed up in someway.

          • yeah …my dad cries every now and then when he sees people banging the war drums for Iran (or insert any country here ) One of his jobs ..at 19 ..was to put the bodies of his fellow soldiers onto the helicopter. Just awful stuff . Much respect to your dad

            • Captain Howdy

              “Much respect to your dad”

              And yours also.

            • Missionary Kid

              That’s why I really hate the attitudes of the chicken hawks. I say, put them on the front lines.

            • Sandy

              I’m taken back – not to a happy place My boyfriend was drafted. One of my college roommates was a returning infantryman. That was an unhappy place in history to grow up …:o(

            • Missionary Kid

              My opinion is that the draft did more to fuel Vietnam protests than anything else. If we had a draft today, the war in Iraq would have been over 5 years ago.

              While we have a more professional military now, they aren’t taking people out of their everyday life like the Vietnam era, unless someone is in the National Guard or reserves, whose members are pulled from their jobs.

              During Vietnam, if you were in the NG, you were basically a draft dodger, because very few were called to active duty. It was a pit of cronyism as far as I was concerned.

    • Missionary Kid

      Sometimes the partly crazy tell good stories, sometimes the partly crazy tell bad stories, sometimes the partly crazy tell stories that we believe and enjoy, and sometimes the partly crazy tell stories we believe and are horrified,

      None, however, are as dangerous as the sane but evil who enthrall enough otherwise sane people to believe and follow their evil bullshit.

      Does that make sense?

      • FLUNK_101

        Sometimes the “partly crazy” tell stories stories that no one believes. I had Scientology friends who thought my Vietnam Vet ex-Sea Org friend was out of his mind … a ticking time-bomb.

        There were aspects to his personality that weren’t real, but there were other features that were very real.

        There was a knife wielding maniac attacking drivers (with their windows open) at intersections in LA. This maniac killed a number of people.

        One hot summer day, he attacked again, only my Vietnam Vet friend was in the passenger seat! He didn’t hesitate. He fought the guy off. He sustained some knife wounds to his chest, but still …

        This is the same guy who told stories of being on the ship and seeing a UFO, and how Hubbard scared it away.

        • The US totally screwed-over Vietnam vets. It makes me furious!

          • Missionary Kid

            Yes, and no. The VA treated me O.K. People treated me O.K., but I also realized that both the protestors and the war hawks had a fixed mindset and didn’t understand that the world is far more complex than their theories.

            The same approach is true for LRHs simplistic theories. Every event and emotion is crammed into his ready made categories.

            I’m more concerned about how the military and the VA are treating veterans now because no-one is really willing to look at the cost of war that goes beyond actual combat. People are surviving now that never would have in the Vietnam era, and they have much more serious problems that require much more care.

        • Missionary Kid

          Regardless of the mindfuck of $cientology, your friend recognized a threat and his training took over. Unfortunately, in spite of all the supposed skills that military training gives for civilian jobs, it’s often what you make out of it. He was trained to survive, and that training kicked in.

          One of the things about the Vietnam era that people forget is that the services were taking everyone because they needed bodies. Some were borderline to start, and going into combat exacerbated their psychosis or problems.

          There were also a lot of Vietnam vets who were able to make the transition from military to civilian life quite easily, but remember that many people who go into the service are at the age where it is the first step leaving home, and going into combat at that age makes a mark that is stronger than it would be if they had more independent life experience.

          • FLUNK_101

            Interesting points, MK.
            My friend’s training was a matter of great pride to him. Not only was he special forces, but he had 5 specialties, including medic. He bragged that the US government spent (in 70’s money) over a quarter of a million dollars training him, partly because of his high score on the IQ test.
            I also knew, while I was “in,” an ex-Navy Seals Scientologist who knew the other guy. He told a story of him taking a crap and getting shot in the ass that made his face turn beet red!
            But the Navy Seals Scientologist was more focused on starting a family. I think that helped him find his way.

            • Missionary Kid

              When you say, “Find his way,” do you mean getting out?

              Green Berets are trained medics, as well as paratroopers. I would imagine that their MOS would also cover rifleman.

              What most people don’t understand is that a Rambo type is the last person you would want in special forces. In movies, they’re bulletproof. In real life, they get everyone killed.

              I believe a certain amount of the ability to dissociate is necessary for those types of military jobs, because it allows the person to focus on the task at hand.

            • FLUNK_101

              the last I saw the Navy Seal guy he was working, focusing on his family, and not very active in Scientology.

            • Missionary Kid

              That’s a good step. A non-$cion family will keep him busy and out, and hopefully grounded to the point that he’ll start to look at LRH’s nuttiness as just that. BTW, his training as a Seal would make him highly resistant to regging, if he chooses to resist.

              The training they get to resist interrogation makes the most severe regging look like a ride at Disneyland. The fact that he got involved at all makes me think that he had some emotional need or was caught at a vulnerable time. Seals are human, but I would expect they usually don’t get involved with $cientology.

      • Snippy_X

        Yes. In monkey colonies, there are some monkeys who are not so good at every day tasks like foraging, but they are extremely sensitive or hyper-vigilant. They are the first to detect the big predator approaching and they alert the group. Then they freeze up and stop functioning from stress overload. But evolution values the eccentric monkey’s role as sentry, so the other, more practical, monkeys come back for the wacky monkey and lead him to safety. It takes all kinds, as they say. Too bad humans would rather mock the creative and exceptional people for being different and leave them behind for the psychopaths to devour, rather than embracing their contributions. As Margaret Mead puts it,

        “If we are to achieve a richer culture, rich in contrasting values, we must recognize the whole gamut of human potentialities, and so weave a less arbitrary social fabric, one in which each diverse human gift will find a fitting place.”

        Casting off the seekers to the clutches of Scientology does not qualify as “a fitting place” for anyone, sane, partly sane or otherwise.

        /endrant

        • Missionary Kid

          Agreed. Putting anyone in the clutches of $cientology is inhumane and crazy-making.

        • Exterrier

          Thoughtful post, Snip… I notice that the whole spectrum of types actually lends to a certain functionality. It has made me way more tolerant of the ones I used to think should see things, or act as I do. That wouldn’t work very well. Tribal societies seemed to know about that, We should all become better anthropologists as we go through life, rather than organize around wedge issues and prejudices.
          I like seekers, and seem to be one, which is why I used to enjoy all the eager and forward looking types who used to frequent a shop I ran. They tended to be self employed, unorthodox artistic types, who were more fun to talk to than the run of the mill business people…and as it turned out they were Scientologists, at a time when the New Regime had not totally set in its fascistic grip. So I got sucked in myself for a while, til I saw what a trap they had all run into.
          Hence, I really appreciate your line about what a waste it is to cast off seekers into the clutches of something as dead end and wasteful of their earnestness as Scientology.

        • sister wendy

          Snippy, do you know the work of Dr. Elaine Aaron? She and her husband have been studying this for about 25-30 years- that ALL mammal groups (including humans) have this trait. She coined it as being HSP (highly sensitive person)Literally 20% of all groups apparently as a genetic trait have more nerve endings than the rest of the group. ie. see more, feel more, hear more, (also get over stimulated more;) but it’s cool. She draws similarities of the 80% being the “warrior kings” and the 20% the “priest advisers” in terms of archetypes.

      • Casabeca

        Yes, the “sane” have no excuse!

    • BuryTheNuts2

      Oh man! I am so sorry.

    • Was that Bill D? If so, I remember his story of LRRP war games and him crawling under a line of artillery disassembling the firing mechanisms. He and Runningbear used to trade stories.

      • FLUNK_101

        Bill? Yes.
        D? His middle initial … you know this guy?!?!?!?

        • I was in the S.O. in pac from march ’77 until mid-to-late ’78. I was on a MOPM mission, mission signs exterior, and I was on the EPF at that time. I knew slightly a few of the older S.O. guys. Runningbear, Jesse, Paul McElven (sp?). I did a bunch of renos at that time too, bunch of plumbing and got attached to pac estates reno’s org just before the 49 days of AOLA. Capt. Bill started up, or at least was somewhere above PERO when it started. He was Estates exec, before he went all galactic patrol. Seems like Bill’s last name started with ‘D’ but it might have been his initial. (My memory for names is getting weaker these days). I just remember his description of his war games with the company he was attached to.
          I used to work out with Doug Harlan in the horseshoe entrance area, we’d do some basic martial arts stuff.
          There were a lot of ex-nam vets in the S.O. I guess it was familiar, but seemed more of a higher purpose, or it was an escape from PTSD.

          I’m so sorry that he took his life. I barely escaped that end myself.

          • Missionary Kid

            I’m glad you escaped, too.

          • FLUNK_101

            Thanks, MLT. Bill’s middle initial was D. It was very exciting for me to read that someone else on the blog actually knew the guy I was talking about. Great to hear. Thanks.

          • pkatz

            To those LRH haters, OT ability deniers and especially those who know nothing of these things, yet want Mike, Marty and others to come to their senses and abandon worthless Scn Tech:

            YOU ARE WHISTLING PAST THE GRAVEYARD. Yes, I mean you.

            I have been waiting for an appropriate place to tell this story, and since Michael mentions Paul McElveen above, I will now.

            Paul was a shipmate and my roommate on Excalibur in the early 70’s. I don’t remember what his job was at that time.

            One payday we got in his stripped-down doorless Jeep and headed out to spend the precious $20 bill each of us had just been given. I was the passenger, my bill was in my right pants pocket.

            Half way up the hill into town I realized my money was gone. I mentioned it to Paul.

            He did an immediate uey and headed back towards the Excal. A minute or two later another uey and onto the shoulder.

            There in the weeds was a $20 bill. I got out put in my pocket and got back in. He looked at me, smiled and said:

            “That’s called knowin’ where it’s at.”

            We never spoke of this. I was sure that all the OTs aboard could do that and other amazing things but LRH told them (in A History of Man, and an HCOB from the 60’s, for example) not to show off their abilities. So, OT ability is real. I saw it in action. (And I am truly sad if you didn’t attain OT in the c of s or if you didn’t feel scn worked for you.)

            To you know-nothing whistlers: Whatsa matter? Mouth a little dry? Think I’m lying? Well say so, but sign your real name, and location, just as i am.

            Paul Katz

            Dunedin, FLA

            • DeElizabethan

              Nice story. Hadn’t stopped there earlier to take a pee? Why did you lose it in first place? Maybe someone playing tricks on ya? Not that I don’t believe your story but all facts should be known for credibility and there are other explanations too. Importantly, who really cares about the small stuff anyway? I know, it’s fun and if you’re laughing I’m with ya! If not I’m sorry.

              W. Dee Findlay
              Clearwater FL

            • Ok, so you are riding in an open car and your $20 flips out of your pocket. Wow. Just flew out… So you didn’t have your hand in the pocket AT ALL? Maybe checking on your hard earned $20 was the very thing that made it fly away? And of course Paul absolutely COULDN’T have noticed this movement in his peripheral vision, noted it subconsciously? Realized when you mentioned it that that was what that flash of movement was, drove back to where he noticed it and DAMN there is the lost money!!!!
              A far simpler and more likely explanation.
              What you have is a bad case of confirmation bias. You believe in “OT” abilities so this story, this event you witnessed, confirms it. Your bias blocks your ability to reason. Sorry, you’ll have to do better.

            • John P.

              Interesting… As I write this, Mr. Paul Katz’s reply was posted 20 hours ago while virtually all the other comments were written three days ago. Why is this significant? Because this is typical of pro-Scientology people commenting on Tony’s blog: they wait until the commentary has died down, and then put up some pro-cult commentary to get the last word, knowing it’s unlikely that people will go back and reply to his comment. That, by the way, is one of the delicious ironies of a cult that teaches people to “confront and shatter suppression.” Apparently, these self-imagined masters of the art of communication are only able to argue when nobody else is listening.

              Incidentally, given the relatively competent narrative, spelling and grammar in this post, I’m going to hazard a guess that Mr. Katz is in the middle of doing his “A-E” steps to try and get back in the good graces of the cult, “striking a decisive blow” against the enemy (i.e., against us). I’m not sure how posting this piece on what will now probably be a lightly read page counts as a “decisive blow.” And of course, since Tony picked up this comment and mocked it in his blog post the next morning (http://tonyortega.org/2013/04/02/why-isnt-scientology-more-open-about-space-opera/ ), it’s even more unlikely to be a decisive blow, merely a moderately interesting joke.

              Sorry, Paul, if this means you’ll have to work just that much harder to be welcomed back to an opportunity to squander even more money to cure your bodily infestation of dead space cooties (body thetans).

            • DeElizabethan

              John P, I agree. A note about giving a blow to the enemy. Yes on the A-E, but primarily in the ethics conditions with person connected to an org or Flag. This is a major point. Sample: Someone confesses to watching the Bunker, etc and is now in an ethics cycle. They then have to do the conditions and one is to make an effective blow. This type comment, they would count as one if it is, depending how bad he was, he may have to do it in much greater volume or less to satisfy the officer. Luv
              “Condition of Liability” “#2 Deliver an effective blow to the enemies of the group one has been pretending to be part of despite personal danger.” Then give lots of money, if you have or give more blows!

        • Both big guys. The last story I heard about Bear was that he did some super-secret mission for LRH involving some three-letter-agency and succeeded but also got caught and ‘fucked up’. By the mid 80’s he seemed to have disappeared. I remember the PAC halloween party of ’77 (I think) everybody got to go, even the RPFers. Jesse and Bear showed up in Samurai gear including Katanas. Impressed the hell out of me. My friend Dan saw Kathleen doing her belly dance there and fell in love.
          I left the S.O. the first time, (three times! I know, I know, such a loser), in late ’78 because I refused to go on the AOLA renos decks with the abusive 30 hours on 3 off schedule. Randy Gomberg tried to lock me up to coerce me but I said, “you close that door and it’s kidnapping”. I routed out, sorta, quoting the Flag Order written by LRH that says “Any Sea Org member wanting to leave must be allowed to leave within 24 hours.” I don’t think it’s ever been canceled, since it’s scripture.
          Went back in in ’79 in time to spend 60 days on the second purification rundown staff pilot human experimentation in the steam heated sauna under the main building. And the last time was in ’84 with SMI Int., where I was sent to try to shut down Harry Palmer in New York. And met Vicki Az., Warren McS., etc.

          • FLUNK_101

            Thanks MLT. I’m riveted!

            • Thank you. Despite the tragedy of it all, it is somehow helpful to know how the people I had met in other eras have fared since. My condolences.

    • FistOfXenu

      This cuts me to the heart Flunk. I’m sorry. People close to me were eaten alive by things they had to see and do in Korea and others by Nam. The amount of pain they carried in themselves until they died was a terrible thing to see. I honor your friend.

      • FLUNK_101

        Thanks Fist.

    • nancy

      I am so sad to hear about your friend…

  • nancy

    I remember Captain Bill quite well, before his new work in Europe and after. One day we were eating lunch, and Captain Bill is chowing down on a small bowl of mayonnaise. He thought it was yogurt. We told him, Captain Bill that is Mayonnaise…. and he responded “well it tastes really good” and he just kept eating.

    • richelieu jr

      TRUE STORY: It is a little-known fact that mayonnaise and ice-cream were both introduced in France the same year, by Cardinal Richelieu who brought them back from southern Spain. They were very chic and exclusive because they had to be kept frozen and fresh and there weren’t a lot of refrigerators around, to say the least. So people would eat them both out of little paper cones with little spoons…

      LET ME REPEAT THAT: The French aristocracy (King included) ate FROZEN MAYONNAISE out of little paper cones and it was COOL! People dreamt of one day eating FROZEN MAYONNAISE!

      • Captain Howdy

        “Cardinal Richelieu who brought them back from southern Spain.”

        So the Moops invented mayonnaise and ice cream ?

        • richelieu jr

          The Moops… The… Moops!

        • Exterrier

          And refrigeration?

          • Captain Howdy

            Da Moops.

            • Captain, I was wondering if you ever came across my “an analysis of scientology” essay? Since you had read some of my stuff.

            • Captain Howdy

              Link please, Sir.

            • Doesn’t seem to be indexed on google. It’s from 2003 anyway: http://ocmb.xenu.net/ocmb/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=5798&p=60388#p60388

            • Captain Howdy

              Thank you Michael & Andrew.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              Yeah, That was awesome to read.

            • Kitz

              Thanks Michael, seems I was incorrect telling you that I had read all of your writings… Missed that one due to the different login. A good read, and have you considered an updated version now that you’ve been out 10 years? You can hit me later for the suggestion, lol. 😉

            • Michael’s essay is a valuable contribution to understanding the noxious allure of Scientology’s methods of control.

              It can be found on OCMB.

              http://ocmb.xenu.net/ocmb/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=100838

              ‘Scientology is evil and scientologists are dangerous.’

              Copyright 2012 Michael Leonard Tilse.

              […]

              I say that Scientology is evil is because it changes the minds of its members through the application of its policy, technology and practices. The members come to view scientology as the most important organization and activity in all the universe and that they alone are the new superior humans who will salvage it from unimaginable horrors. These elite, these homo novis then have the mandate to do anything necessary without regard to morals or laws or acceptable conduct among us humans to ensure scientology not only survives, but becomes itself the dictator of laws, morals and acceptable conduct. It is a recipe for evil.

              That’s the evil of scientology and that’s why I know scientologists are dangerous. I used to be one.

              […]

              Andrew

      • sugarplumfairy

        They also chopped people’s heads off for public entertainment.. Just sayin’..

      • sister wendy

        I love this! Early French “health food” 😉

      • The good cardinal would have put me to death for heresy; I am a Miracle Whip guy.

      • Bella Legosi

        There was a time when pastries and chocolates were made entirely by Nun’s. That was until the Monks found out just how delicious the Nuns found sweets. So, just like any good Catholic in that time, the Church deemed it “dirty” for Nuns to indulge so much so they took it away from them and had Monks make pastries……leave it to Catholics to ruin it again for women everywhere! 😀

        • Captain Howdy

          And for the first 1,000 years of the CC priests were allowed to marry.

          • Bella Legosi

            And for some time there were Brothels owned by the Universal Church 😉

            • Bella Legosi

              Hey Captain I have to ask……are you Linda Blaires demon or cyber stalker/serial killer in Strangeland 🙂 I have been wanting to ask.

  • Clambake got me here. Anonymous keeps me here.

    • Trustmeonthis

      This place got me to wwp!

  • Bella Legosi

    Yeah Scientologists do conspiracy theory well. And there is nothing wrong with dressing up in womans clothes ;P hehe thank you Tony….I now have a little peice of pride being a former Rainbow Girl Chaplin….yea you read that right….I got to open and bless the room in that weird scene….the night of my initiation one of the Masons came up to me and said not to be alarmed if some people said they worshiped the devil…..kinda screwed for a 13 year old girl to hear….I got the Chaplin gig the next week because I am pretty competent speaking Bible talk and the last chap got preggers!!!!! Masons FTW

    • Captain Howdy

      WTF? Your story sounds as crazy and interesting as the rest of them.

      • Bella Legosi

        Yeah….my life has been one really strange trip….kinda like a demented comic book….

        • Captain Howdy

          Thanks for the elaboration, Bella.

    • MissCandle

      I agree with C.H. Please tell more.

      • Bella Legosi

        Ok I am going to try to condense this one down. My father and I lived in Palmer, AK. It is prolly one of the smallest towns I have ever lived in. There were rumors among the middle schoolers that Satanic worship went on in the sewers. For serious, this was an actual rumor spread by kids and their uber Christian parents. Anyways, my dad figured I shouldn’t be stuck in a small town with nothing to do. A friend of his offered membership into the Rainbow Girls of Palmer, if I was found worthy. Since I was never confirmed Catholic, did not partake in Confession or the Eucharist, and my grandfather had been a Mason I was accepted.

        Anyone who doesn’t know of or heard about Rainbow Girls it’s pretty much like a Rotory Club or Girl Scouts. They do community service and things like that. When they meet once a week they dress up to the 9’s in either Sunday best or Prom dresses (depends on how much money you had to spend on such things). I was initiated into this order. It was very Christian. We opened with prayer, closed with prayer and there were a lot of goody goody do good Christian attitudes towards the whole scene. The room is emptied out of everyone who is not a Rainbow Girl and then the meeting commences. Discussions of community services, bake sales, or plays for the local church would be talked about. Then I was initiated into it by prayer and taking an oath to hold my life up to Christian values and to serve Mankind. After the meeting is when the fathers and mothers of the Rainbow Girls would come in and mingle. That is when the head Mason for the Palmer order came up to me and said: “Now that you are a part of the Masonic Order please don’t be scared if some in this town tell you we worship Satan.” Calm as a bomb. “Obviously we don’t worship the Devil! We are a Christian order, but I felt I had to warn you now that you are one of us.” lol Talk about having an awkward silence. I laughed it off at the time because I was about 12 or so and had not yet entered the Rabbit Hole that is Conspiracy!

        Upon the next weeks meeting I was called up by the Head Rainbow girl (I would give proper titles, but this was nearly 17 years ago…..many braincells have died since then). The order was in a fix, because the Chaplin that took part in my initiation found out she was pregnant, thus kicked right the hell out of Rainbow Girls. They needed someone to fill in while they found a new one. She had said that it was my reciting of the Bible verses during my initiation that told her I was able and competent in performing this function. I agreed under the condition that I would not remain the Chaplin. Even at this time I took Christianity with a grain of salt and felt that as one who had doubts about scripture I should not be the one to be a Chaplin or the one to “bless” the meetings. After 3 weeks they didn’t find another Chaplin. I hated dressing up with a passion, and all in all I felt this whole order was one of the biggest wastes of my time and very boring. I told my dad about this and he said if I no longer wanted to go I didn’t have to. I ended up telling the Mason about my doubts with the heavy Christian-ness of Rainbow Girls and said I really no longer felt comfortable. He was very sweet about it and told me should I change my mind I was always welcomed back.

        I never went back.

        🙂

        • Bella Legosi

          Omg now that you guys got me to spill the secrets of the inner world of Masonic teenage girls……I might have an “accident” so if you never hear from me again it totally was the Rainbow Girls and the Masons, with the help of the Vatican! I should have never written about Propaganda Duo!!!! lol j/k

          • stanrogers

            As I recall, the Masonic penalties are pretty spectacular and gaudy and they’re meant to be seen and understood by those who have taken the oaths. So no worries about a quiet disappearance, okay? Oh, and P2 was… let’s see… if a Scientologist is “disconnected” and a Jehovah’s Witness is “disfellowshipped”, then I guess a renegade Masonic organisation would be “dislodged”? It’s okay to diss ’em now.

            The “devil worship” was a bit of a joke, I think. In 33-degree Masonry, there tends to be an idea that levels above Master (to put it in CoS terms, people on the OT Levels) are an extension or perpetuation of the Knights Templar, and that may or may not include references to Baphomet (the “false god” that the Templars were supposed to have been heretically worshipping). Near as anybody who’s done any rigorous historical digging can tell, this “Baphomet” was a bastardization of Mohammed (a name which renders slightly differently in different dialects/languages among the Arabics), and the only “worship” that could be discovered without torture (which tends to give you the answers you want to hear rather than the truth) are a few scattered writings saying the dude had a coupe of good ideas (especially as regards things like women’s rights, equality among people, and other stuff that much of the world of Islam seems to have forgotten along the way).

            • Bella Legosi

              Niiiiice……I love a person that knows their history! My experience with RG helped me take a lot of conspiracy theory with caution…..have we been reading blasphemous material like Holy Blood Holy Grail? great book by the way….very entertaining

            • Bella Legosi

              oh my you know about P2 toooooo? 🙂 I am sooooo on the verge of dorking off about Propaganda Duo right now. So, how is Italy these days……..oh they kinda have a government? A new Pope? OMG *head just blew 50ft out of itself*

              So Stan have we been reading blasphemous materials such as Holy Blood Holy Grail? Been reading about the Gnostic’s? 🙂 It was this experience with the whole Masonic Orders that actually helped me when I soon discovered the world of Conspiracy theory…..which is well on its way to being an autonomous cult itself!

            • stanrogers

              Came at it from a couple of directions. I’m a lewis, so I was in early if I wanted to be, but never really wanted to be. I could probably pass for Fellow Craft if I needed to (they’ve fiddled with the Master stuff since I was a kid) but it’s been a couple of generations since one could get out of a spot of trouble around these parts by standing square and knowing the patter.

              I read both Holy Blood, Holy Grail (because I thought I had reason to trust Baigent and Lincoln at the time; I made it almost all the way through the first chapter before it got funny enough to want to see where it was headed) and a lot of Stephen Knight’s ravings (frankly, I think he got blackballed and the whole Jack the Ripper thing was a case of sour grapes). I think they might have had more of an effect on me if I hadn’t read the Illuminatus Trilogy first. I think they should make both Illuminatus and Foucault’s Pendulum compulsory reading in school — it’s hard to take harebrained conspiracy theorists seriously after that. But both Freemasonry and the Templars have interesting histories even without the nonsense, and I don’t think that it’s impossible that the Craft started out as a sort of underground railroad for people who didn’t particularly want to be barbecued, and that like the Musgrave Ritual in the Sherlock Holmes story, folks who weren’t privy to the secrets carried on regardless.

              The Peduisti were interesting, though. Their Lodge wasn’t much like our Mother at all. I get the feeling that their tyler took the job a little more seriously than the ordinary bored businessman with a bit of a middle-age spread.

            • Bella Legosi

              I enjoyed the historical aspect of Holy Blood but lol yea I totally agree with your sentiment. I have not read nor heard of Illuminatus and Foucault’s Pendulum, I just may have to check it out. Ancient Mystery school stuff interests the hell out of me. I have been exposed to Bill Cooper and as much as I love what the guy had to say, he too even got out there with conspiracy.

              lol so are you the Mason that they’ve sent after me? 😛

        • MissCandle

          Dear Bella L, Thanks for sharing your story. I have been curious about Rainbow Girls since I was young. I once knew a Rainbow Girl and was under the impression from her that the “club” was about doing good service deeds, etc. But everything about them was such a secret. When I asked my fundamentalist Christian parents about the Rainbow Girls, I was surprised when they told me it was a cult and needed to be avoided. Thanks for the insight, Bella L.

          • Bella Legosi

            Surely welcome

  • sugarplumfairy

    Bill sounds like a bully..

    I can’t believe a card-carrying, ron-quoting, bull-baiting co$ A-teamer referenced Fahrenheir 451.. how dare he.. sacrilege..

    • sister wendy

      They were all bullies. It’s important to remember it- because that’s where it all starts to go side-wise- people imitating and trying to learn useful communication tools from people who have a strong bully streak. Life is really short, having to cherry pick out past the bully part is hard. But some people do seem to be able to do it. Don’t want to diss them.

  • jensting

    Capt Bill sounds healthy, compared to LRH.

    And this time I’m voting against WWP because Operation Clambake was there first. Without Operation Clambake there would have been no WWP.

  • What a great one-two punch for a Saturday morning. Between the Capt. Bill craziness and the incredible demonstration of regging by Tory and Karen I feel like I’ve gotten my Easter basket early.

  • Patty Moher

    “THE BUNKER: Wait a minute. You’re saying that Bill’s
    girlfriend told you he dressed in women’s clothing to receive messages
    from outer space, and hoping for an incarnation of L. Ron Hubbard to
    appear?”

    Come on, where else can you get this wonderful shit!?! Thanks so much Tony for starting my day off with a hearty laugh.

    • FistOfXenu

      This just has to go in our production of “Springtime for Hubbard”

  • That is…. that is one heck of a speech.

    • sugarplumfairy

      Yep.. It speaks volumes that he immediately took over from gaiman when the heckling started, and then cowed the hecklers by staring straight at them and using the SP threat.. he was a big fat bully..

  • BosonStark

    Ahoy mateys! Capt. Bill — now there was yer REAL Scientologist. Having worked with Hubbard for centuries, he was also the most Hubbard-like. That’s probably why he had to go. Except in the early years, there was room for only one person with such paranoia and imagination.

    The idea, if something happened to Hubbard, Capt. Bill would have taken over, really boggles the mind, doesn’t it? I think it would have died out in a couple of decades. In order to survive, Scientology needed a true Ron-worshiper like Miscavige who would deify Hubbard but not get into the aliens-among-us stuff himself. Instead, he would refine the manipulation part of it.

    On Howes and his 3rd set of teeth (a Dianutty miracle), this is extremely rare. When it does happen, the third set is not like the second set. Invariably, they come in all whacky and need to be surgically removed.

    • richelieu jr

      Seriously though, can you imagine Miscavige allowing anybody as much title and power as ol’ Ron habitually did? L’il Davey is way to afraid of competition, so he has to cut everyone down to even smaller size than himself…

      • Captain Howdy

        Can you imagine Capt Bill taking even one order from a little punk like D.M ?

        • sugarplumfairy

          Yah, but dm would have discovered and played the cross-dressing card… That would even up the match a bit..

          • Captain Howdy

            Capt. honey badger wouldn’t give a shit.

      • Schockenawd

        So, then, what you’re suggesting is that, if anyone is going to dress up in skirts and heels and cherry-red lips trying to coax the lover Elron back into this realm for the good of all mankind, it must be DM?

        • richelieu jr

          I think he’d look fetching, Schockenawd!

      • BosonStark

        Ron allowed people some power because He was the Source. Even when he wasn’t the Source, he was the source of inspiration to smaller sources like Mayo and Capt Bill.

        DM is the keeper of the Source, and all the Source stood for — ripping people off, enslaving them, sometimes making them feel elated to be elite (E2BE). Being keeper of the Source is a hard job and not many loons even want it.

        Capt Bill, 400+ OT levels? The man would have been up to more OT levels than burgers sold at McDonald’s if the Marcabians hadn’t stopped him.

        • richelieu jr

          Well put, BS.

  • Bella Legosi

    Captain Bill is why Scientology will never be taken seriously among countless other reasons (see Bloggig Dianetics @ the underground bunker) ;D

  • Kimberly (Mc Nally Wolery )

    In the ’70’s, sexual harassment and molestation of underage girls was typical by Alan Walter. Did he have that modeled by LRH when he worked with him?

  • Observer

    I may have to abstain again. I’ll have to think about this one.

    Tory, Karen, AGP–brilliant work! I would have been laughing except that I know it’s all true. And I imagine it’s getting worse.

    omg, can’t stop laughing at this: “Adds Atack: ‘The first major splinter group formed around Ron Howes, who claimed that with Dianetics he had grown new teeth (he didn’t say where he’d grown them, and if I know anything about the Tech it was probably in an embarrassing place.'” There is no snark like erudite snark, and I bow before the Master, Jon Atack!

    • pronoia

      I am liking these new AGP videos with Karen. And to find out after all this time that she was War and Peace!

  • Ms. B. Haven

    Looks like the Sunday funnies are a day early.

    All I have to say is thank the gods for the Freezone. Way back when, I was trying to unload my scientology library on eBay with no luck. Books were going for pennies on the dollar if they were going at all and eBay wouldn’t allow e-meters to be posted. Some Freezone yahoo contacted me on the side and I was able to unload everything I had for maybe 10 cents on the dollar. I am wondering if I shouldn’t have held out and waited for the Basics to be released. Since my collection was the real deal, I might have been able to get 11 cents on the dollar today.

  • N. Graham

    Gotta vote for the one I use the most- xenu.com! I wonder if next year there could be a division between individuals and groups, giving the David Loves and Jenna Miscaviages a better chance.

  • Espiando

    In the beginning was the Old Guard. They emerged on a.r.s., then when a.r.s. became too toxic due to Scilon astroturfing and trolls, sought refuge. A wise Norwegian showed them a cave where they would be safe. And it was from the cave that they planned and executed strategies against the Church. But the cave was small and they were few in number, and their strategies didn’t work as well as expected. They grew cramped and occasionally demoralized, as the darkness of the cave threatened to isolate them.

    But one day, a rumble was heard outside the cave. Some of the denizens peeked out and beheld an unbelievable sight: an army, each soldier with pale skin and a long, skinny mustache on identical faces. Then the cave-dwellers heard words, the army speaking as one, but with not a lip moving: “Your enemy has attempted to hurt us. Such things, we do not forgive. We do not forget. We have heard of your cause and deem it righteous. We will help you. All we ask is that you impart your wisdom to us, so that we can deliver more effective blows. However, let us make it clear: we are not your personal army.”

    Some of the Old Guard did not know what to make of this army. Some were taken afraid and decided to go deeper into the cave to escape them. But there were others in the cave tribe who could see the potential of having an army. Two of the wisest, a man named Mark and a woman named Tory, decided to give the army the guidance they requested. Mark and Tory left the cave, blinking as they stepped into the sun.

    What they saw was a new world, with infinite potential. Their skepticism, as well as their pessimism, melted away, for sunshine is the most effective disinfectant. Mark and Tory began to march with the identical men. Soon, messages from them came to the cave: Mark and Tory were telling the cave-dwellers that this army was a pretty cool guy and doesn’t afraid of anything. More cave-dwellers emerged back into the sunlight to join them. They could return to the cave anytime they liked, but it would be for visits. No longer would they have to dwell there for safety, isolated from the world, with a need for protection.

    There was no longer anything to fear.

    • Captain Howdy

      Can we get that engraved on a titanium plate?

      • FistOfXenu

        To store deep in the Bunker in case of nuclear attack?

        • BuryTheNuts2

          Or Marcabians!

          • FistOfXenu

            I’ll take care of the Marcabians..

            • BuryTheNuts2

              And the Scientologist’s thought you were the bad guy!
              Silly rabbits!

            • FistOfXenu

              I didn’t say HOW I’ll take care of them. 🙂
              Let’s just say that practically nothing in the rest of the guh-LAX-y is really like the stories LRH told about it.

    • aquaclara

      the story for the ages…thanks.

    • stillgrace

      Well done! Your story is historical entertainment with a kind of “Richard Bach-Jonathon LIvingston Seagull-Illusions” kind of vibe to it. My head is exploding with admiration.

    • FistOfXenu

      Espiando, you’ve convinced me, no more voting for me. WWP and Clambake need each other and shouldn’t be put against each other. Clambake had a LOT of data out there but WWP got it out there big time. WWP had the guns but Clambake had the ammunition. We can’t be expected to decide which is better.

      • 1subgenius

        In this exercise there are no losers.

    • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

      We in RTC vigorously condemn OCMB as the “Original Hater Website” and see WWP as its evil spawn.

      With the exception of OSA-authorized personnel, all persons who have ever posted on either OCMB or WWP need to be arrested and sentenced to 10 years of selling the Basics in airports and on the streets to make up for the damage they have done by “exposing” the Church of Scientology.

      • BosonStark

        Instead of selling flowers like the Moonies, I can just see them approaching people to buy a set of the Basics. I don’t think they could give away volumes of the Nutterpedia and there’s probably a whole warehouse of that somewhere. After the revised Basics thing emptied out about a tenth of the cult, you notice how they didn’t have the same push for the Nutterpedia? I can’t imagine why, considering Ron’s immense importance in fields like photography, horticulture and music, all on Venus of course.

        While at first I found it a bit weird that Andreas’ site was called Operation Clambake — even with the reference from the History of Man — after I read Barefaced Messiah, about their various “Operations,” I thought it was pretty clever. It’s still a little odd though and I wonder what percentage of Scientologists would get either reference?

  • 0tessa

    Hearing the lecture of Hubbard I got a strong impression I was listening to a standup comedian, and not even a bad one for that matter (lots of laughter by the audience). I couldn’t help thinking that he was making the story up on the spot. As comedy, it’s not that bad. But as religious philosophy, that’s a completely different story.

    • einsteinonthebeach

      Oh yes, he was making it up as he goes along. It’ s almost an unavoidable conclusion when you actually hear the fraudster’s voice. And he grins with each lie, with “duper’s delight.”

    • As comedy, I thought it was pointless. Occasionally in his story people would get killed, and the audience would laugh. They also sometimes laughed at nothing in particular.

      • 0tessa

        Well, you know how scientologists think about ‘dropping the body’?

  • BosonStark

    For Andreas to start the Operation Clambake website when he did and continue it is hard for me to grasp. He wasn’t a journalist, wasn’t an ex-member, just someone who had the integrity to do the right thing at a time that it was such a risk. Sure, Anonymous did that, but by then it was much safer, and they did it anonymously.

    I’m glad I didn’t know about Scientology in 1996 because I surely would have attracted the cult’s attention on Usenet.

    Like Paulette Cooper’s book, the Usenet group on Scientology, and the Tom Cruise video, Andreas’s website can be seen as the beginning of the end for Scientology — when ordinary people would begin to learn what was going on, how it worked, what they believed, and ex-members had a place to tell their stories and share their opinions.

    • Espiando

      Frankly, the reason why the environment for protest became much safer is because we Anons did it anonymously, and in huge numbers. The OG had targets pasted on them by OSA, and OSA’s methods were effective against them because their identities became known and they put themselves out there. OSA, though, found it very difficult to target someone when they didn’t know the identity of the target. In the era just before Anon came on the scene, OSA spent a lot of effort to identify BlownForGood and Little Bear Victor, and couldn’t do it (although I’m sure they had Marc Headley at or near the top of their list for BFG).

      After the March 10, 2008 protest, OSA said publicly that they would “handle” Anon just like they handled the OG. What a terrific job they did with that, huh? OSA’s weaknesses got exposed. The OG/Anon alliance was perfectly synergistic, and enabled the true endgame to start. Clambake is the ancestral homeland, but WWP/Enturbulation was the New World. I’m an American of “Polish” ancestry (depending on which Euro-power had control over what area of Poland at the time). However, when I joined the military, I didn’t put on a Polish uniform. I honor Clambake, but WWP’s been the greater force for good.

      Yeah, the OG put themselves on the firing line, and I love them for that. But the OG’s war tactics were World War I trench warfare compared to the modern combined operations doctrine practiced by Anon. We all know what gets the better results, and the most survivors.

      (What the hell is it with me and the military metaphors today?)

      • Captain Howdy

        “What the hell is it with me and the military metaphors today?”

        It’s that N. Korean kid’s fault. He’s got everybody thinking about war.

      • pronoia

        I think that is an excellent analysis except for one thing. While I had known for many years that scientology was a creepy cult (my sister worked for a short while for some whales in Santa Barbara) I didn’t get interested until chanology through down the gauntlet when the church tried to pull the Tom Cruise video. And it was awhile before I found enterbulation.org (goog times!) but I did find Xenu.net and is where I fell into the rabbit hole of scientology watching. And I feel in my bones that had operation clambake not been there and running along as it had, anonymous would never’ve been galvanize as it was as it was/is a place that is a one stop destination for all that is wrong with scientology. For instance, I will never ever forget reading for the first time. The stories about the int base by BFG and BTs2free and others. It is just that I feel that anonymous and the Internet in general would’ve quickly lost interest had not clambake and all the people who contributed to it been there.

        • Espiando

          I don’t deny that Clambake and its members were essential to getting Anon on the right path. However, the game changed when we got involved. It’s an incredible resource, but for the purpose of determining SMERSH, Anon is a superior candidate.

          There is one very big reason why which I’ve rarely, if ever, seen discussed. We’re all agreed that the most important level of the Upper Bridge is OTIII. The exes and Indies all say that. The E/P of OTIII is “freedom from overwhelm”. That’s straight out of Hubbard, right? Everyone completing OTIII can’t be discombobulated by any situation. With all those sooper-dooper OTs in OSA, how is it, then, that they got overwhelmed by Anon? In other words, Anon put a dagger into the heart of one of the most important aspects of the Tech and showed it to be a lie. The fact that Anon kept showing up, and that OSA’s attempts to hit them (PIs, what they did with Gregg Housh, what they tried to do with Sean Carasov (RIP), etc.) did nothing. Anon came back stronger each time, and started to make asses of them. AGP’s handling of Ken Moxon alone…

          The fact that Anon was still there, still protesting, and still going strong over a half decade was an eye-opener to a lot of people still in, and it’s still having that effect to this day. Anon induced the trench warfare mentality into CoS that OSA forced the OG into. Karma’s a bitch.

          • FistOfXenu

            And anybody with any sense LOVES Anon for what they did and what they’re doing now. It’s just the problem of having to vote AGAINST somebody.

            • pronoia

              I agree, it is in the end a real chicken or egg conundrum. And the divisions between the og and anons are being erased by time. Rather, there are exes (some of whom are og and some who aren’t) and everyone else, some of whom started off as og and some as anons.

              There are 2 reasons that I (as a newfag-type anon) am going with OC: I think that they were indispensable in the early days of anon and the fact that they are still there near the top of the google. Whereas anonymous has dispersed-as it should since it was never about individuals.

              Flimsy reasoning perhaps but it is a hateful choice to have to make and I was sorely tempted to not even vote.

      • BosonStark

        I get the being anonymous aspect of Anonymous, and that that was both necessary and the secret of its success in rallying such a large number of people to protest, and also increase awareness of Scientology’s censorship and abuses. I also agree that Anonymous has made it much easier and safer for journalists and everybody to protest and for ex-members to get their experiences or books out there. It makes them the ultimate SMERSH.

        Anonymity also made the early years of Usenet more comfortable and useful to many of us.

        Another organic factor was people’s growing access to video on YouTube (2005) and elsewhere that not only sparked Anonymous over the Cruise video, but that Anonymous used successfully in presenting their mission and the hundreds of videos of all sorts that were critical of Scientology, and swamped what used to be Scientology’s greatest strength — propaganda — drawing people into their mystery sandwich trap.

        Even today, Andreas’ website continues to be a major source for people looking to read their FIRST real information about Scientology. What a thorn it was to have in their side, before Wiki, before video, before Anonymous, before Google, for people to search for Scientology and have his website come up 2nd or 4th on the search list. So, as far as before 2008, before Anonymous, Andreas and his website probably saved thousands of people from getting involved in Scientology, as more and more people, who were considering Scientology, might check some things out about it on the Web, before signing up.

        I mistakenly thought it was a no-brainer, that rather than undergoing the uncomfortable feeling when you’re being pressured to buy into something that you don’t know much about while taking their stupid “personality test,” that people would explore it on the Internet. Well, I think more people are doing that now, just as they are doing with other products, and with Scientology, that would have happened without Anonymous.

        Before ESMB and Marty’s site, Andreas’ site was probably a resource for members having doubts as well, that was perhaps a little more accessible than Usenet for some.

        Anonymous has reached people inside the cult and outside, that might not have been reached for many years though. There are certain areas of Scientology that are hard for Anonymous or anyone to reach though, like the whales or celebrities. Wright’s book might have a bigger impact on them.

        So, once you decided to protest, or really wanted to follow the day-to-day happenings of Scientology, WWP was the place to go, but it was never a first stop for information, was it?

        • Espiando

          Well, Bo, you yourself said it: “(Anon) is the Ultimate SMERSH”. That’s what this bracket is supposed to decide. Clambake making it this far is a tribute to the work done there. They were SMERSH. On February 10th, 2008, they passed the torch.

          We are SMERSH. We do not forgive. We do not forget. Expect us.

          • FistOfXenu

            So does that mean you’re coming after anybody that didn’t vote for you? 😛

            PS did they pass the torch or did they light your torch with theirs? Just a question.

            • Espiando

              I’m only going after the person who downvoted me in a couple of my responses. I don’t speak for Anon, though.

              As for the torch, they passed the torch as SMERSH that day. But there was definitely some mutual lighting involved.

            • FistOfXenu

              Don’t know if you’ve seen it but 1 of the problems with Disqus is that it’s easy to down arrow somebody by accident. And some people use the down arrow just to say “I don’t agree” and others use it to say “I don’t like you” and all kinds of things in between.

              As far as the torch, I like to think we’re all busy making sure there’s lots of torches shining light into all the dark corners of $cientarCONon. The more the merrier. And Anon is busy with those flame throwers making sure the dark corners catch fire so the nasty vermin have no place to hide.

            • aquaclara

              Love the torches and flame throwers! And on the sometimes hard to explain down arrows, the “up” and “down” arrows on tablets are verrrry verrrry close together. I always assume a fat finger first. Add an evening glass of vino, and those little buttons get even closer.

    • FistOfXenu

      The guy deserves a medal for heroism. And the way he handled $cibot trolls was a beautiful thing to watch. Tory is the result, and like Espiando points out Tory was 1 of the people who knew enough to get the rest of us on board with Anon. Genius. And I’ll say it again, trying to pick between them is like deciding if i prefer my right eye or my left eye.

  • sister wendy

    Wow! Captain Bill! He’s a cross-dressing musical theater singer! All that’s missing is the dance choreo. It’s the start of our very own Book of Mormon-Scientology musical! With it’s very own creepiness factor built in! “we only live to die, in our ships out in the sky!” The E. Power Biggs organ effect only adds to it all. My goodness….The intensity level is about the same..but of course- the South Park writers have better lyrics…..http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHEqCXY2B-w

    • 1subgenius
      • sister wendy

        So speechles…! Hahaha!

        • 1subgenius

          From one of the songs (sung by children, btw):
          “Some say the “L” (in L. Ron Hubbard) stands for “liar”.
          That’s not true.
          It stands for Lafayette.”

          Very much like the South Park writers in “Book of Mormon” (killer soundtrack, btw), the writers here present just facts, even from the subject’s point of view, and let them speak for themselves.

      • Captain Howdy

        Yes indeed, “A Very Merry Unauthorized Children’s Scientology Pageant” has been bringing the theta to us wogs since 2003.. They are VIP’s in this thing of ours.

      • Missionary Kid

        Even though the kids were supposed to sound cheesy, they were still better than Cap’n Bill and his ensemble.

      • ParticleMom

        Already own it. 😉 ParticleDad got it for me as a Christmas gift before we were married. I knew he was the one!

    • Scientology is at the stage that the Mormon Church was 169 years ago, when in a fit of rage at an unflattering article about himself in the ‘Nauvoo Expositor’, an Illinois newspaper, Joseph Smith ordered his followers to destroy the printing presses.

      But this church has changed and instead of attacking the 2011 ‘Book of Mormon’ musical used it cleverly for self-promotion; “You’ve seen the musical, now read the book!’

      This displayed a maturity by using humour and irony, qualities that Scientology cannot ever have, not even if it survives for 75,000,000 years as Ron’s teachings don’t allow it.

      Andrew

      • sister wendy

        I remember reading how the writers were concerned about how the Mormon Church would respond, and were so pleased that the Church just used it as an additional marketing tool.

  • Joe L

    Does anyone here know about Revaluation Co-Counsling (RC) started by Harvey jackins in the 1950’s as a splinter group from Dianetics? Jackins was booted from Dianetics by Hubbard and reported to the FBI as a communist. RC is possibly the largest squirrel organization today. Yet it is largely unknown. And even people in RC seem to be unaware of its the Scientology origins. Here are some links:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harvey_Jackins

    http://old.disinfo.com/archive/pages/article/id814/pg2/index.html

    http://home.comcast.net/~reevaluation-counseling/sexlies.htm

    • Captain Howdy

      Very interesting stuff. I know about The Process, EST, NXIVM and a few others I can’t recall at the moment, but I don’t recall this at all. Thanks.

    • Missionary Kid

      I was unaware of Harvey Jackins’ and Dianetics connection and the whole organization when I was involved with Co-counseling in Southern California.

      One of the most emphasized rules was that there should be no exterior involvement outside of sessions between co-counselors unless they had a preexisting relationship. Perhaps that was the result of Jackins misdeeds. At the time, I took it to be an attempt to avoid the pitfalls of transference.

      The only direction involved from one co-counselor to another was if a person kept avoiding a topic that they had alluded to. The emphasis was on listening, not directing the person being co-counseled.

      There was little or no money involved, if I remember it correctly, and no political agenda.

      The purpose, as it was presented, was simply for a person to relieve themselves of the pain attached to past events so that they would not be re-stimulated by events perceived to be similar.

      The agenda was only for the person to gain insight into their own self. Perhaps I was lucky to come in contact with a benign splinter group.

    • Chocolate Velvet

      Yes. I have always tried to steer people away from co-counseling, knowing the link to LRH. I have a post on my blog which includes an excerpt from and a link to a paper about “cultism” in RC. You can find it here: http://wp.me/p2M3lN-1T

      In that post, there is also a link to the Rick Ross cult-watcher website. He has a whole page about RC, and info on other psychotherapy cults. It’s a great resource.

      • Captain Howdy

        If you wanna know “cults’ in general, Rck Ross com is the place to land.

  • Holy crap …Bill was a nutter.

  • BosonStark

    The creation of the Easy-Bake oven is a milestone for Man comparable to his discovery of the light bulb and superior to his inventions of the Barbie Doll and cake mix.

  • BosonStark

    Capt. Bill was the creator of the Peek-a-Boo belly shirt, which would have been a milestone for Sea Org Man comparable to Dr. Hubtard’s discovery of young teen girls dressed in hot pants, but the style couldn’t hold up under the weight of his belly.

  • BuryTheNuts2

    Cant. Stop. Laughing.

    • Captain Howdy

      Yes. I want to thank Tony and especially Mr. Atack for making me laugh my ass off more than I ever have, scieno wise, before.

  • Sherbet

    Abstaining. This is a matchup for the exes to decide.

    • Trustmeonthis

      I think anon is going to win the whole deal, because it seems to really, really want to.

      • Who is Tony going to give the trophy? Anybody who shows up at the awards ceremony is not Anonymous anymore!

  • Bob

    Although it may seem over the top, Karen’s depiction of a reg cycle is fairly accurate. She did a great job of capturing the intention and sincerity of the reg. I know I would have given in to her had she caught me while I was still drinking the cool-aid.

  • SandiCorrena

    Saw the Rockcenter Preview! I adore those two guys like a proud mama or auntie, CoolHand and 10oreocookies! If you ever need a stand in relative in Houston you call me!

  • Artoo45

    OMG x ∞
    Bill Richardson is a world-class, fabulous, almost Pythonesque character! There are all these amazing subthreads in the tapestry of Scientology that would make the best movies. Galactic Patrol with Elron Elray and Astar Paremijian for starters. And that song! A masterpiece of unintended hilarity. Scientology and it’s rich history would be a comedy of epic proportions if only there weren’t a trail of corpses and ruined lives in its wake.

    • Espiando

      Well, most religions have trails of corpses and ruined lives in their wake. One example is Mormonism. And yet, there is a certain musical which won nine Tony Awards running on Broadway, which has just opened to raves in the West End. And, gee, don’t the authors of that musical have an interest in Scientology, as expressed in a certain other medium that they perform creative acts in?

      It can be done.

    • There used to be a Galactic Patrol branch office down on sunset blvd on the way to silverlake. I used to wonder about it, even went in once, but decided it was probably squirrel. It had that ‘Weapon shops of Isher’ vibe.

    • BuryTheNuts2

      Scientology and it’s rich history would be a comedy of epic proportions if only there weren’t a trail of corpses and ruined lives in its wake.

      This ^^^^ yawning gap of a paradox is one of the most difficult to reconcile in my brain!

      How can Scientology be so brutal and destructive and yet so over the top in its moon-bat hilarious glory?

      I never know when I read this blog if I am going to end up angry and sad or if I am going to having spontaneous fits of laughter that make people look at me as if I need med’s.
      And most days seems to be a bit of both.
      I think I need to listen to Galactic Patrol one more time.
      Or Nina Simone. I can’t decide.

  • the sad part is ..it is totally obvious that Bill had some serious , serious mental issues. Paranoid delusions ..bloated sense of self importance ~ he was in a biker gang for crying out loud . The fact that only a very few people fell for this is a credit to the human race. And honestly …scientologists who are still around, even after all the communication drills or whatever …still cannot explain what it is that they believe in . Scientology is not a philosophy , it is not a religion…it is just some big emotional ponzi / amway / up with people / only the tip and only for a second/ scam . Makes for a great South Park episode though .

    • SP ‘Onage

      Do you know which biker gang he was in? I was wondering why he was talking about scaring 40 bikers away with the 7th dynamic…yeah, right! These people are effing weird! They remind me of a scary thespian troupe.

      • “scary thespian group” ..LOL. No idea what biker gang he was in …i only know of the Hell’s Angels and i think they are a bunch of rich lawyers now .

        • SP ‘Onage

          haha! 🙂

  • FistOfXenu

    Okay, can somebody PLEASE tell me how Atack lost so early in SMERSH madness? This guy is a champion. Thanks for keeping him talking, TonyO.

    As for Captain Bill, well what can I say? Poor guy od’d on the clam aid. But I’m glad for his sake he didn’t live to see the DM yrs. He may’ve been batshit crazy but that’s no reason to have his heart broke too.

    • Missionary Kid

      This SMERSH contest was really designed to get everyone talking. The eventual winner is not that important, because the path has reminded us of the people who have done damage to the mental illness called $cientology, often at great personal cost.

  • einsteinonthebeach

    LRH makes another one of his classic understatements in that Marcab Lecture:

    “There were more drivers killed, there was more blood pouring on that track all the time… it was goofed up.”

    Yes, Ron, nice sentiment… goofy indeed.

  • Mary_McConnell

    It’s nice to see the human factor in all this about Bill and I appreciate Jon’s stories about him.

    IMHO, Capt Bill was bonkers long before the time of his supposedly wearing dresses. As I have mentioned before, I got to see Bill in action on what was probably one of his last days before being booted out. He was delusional, hallucinating. Talking to himself. Here’s the story:

    ” At one time, I had trained and was posted for maybe 6 months in HCO at a local org, even thought I was later informed that I was not qualified for that division ( ). Anyway, that training & experience came in handly one day when I was in CA and I went to LA Org to buy a book to resell to a ‘wog’ I was FSMing. IThere was no receptionist or booktore officer around. MAtter of fact, I couldn;t find any staff. So I looked over the books, hoping to grab the next staff member who would come by so I could get the book and get back to ASHO.

    All of a sudden a really crazed looking man barged in the main door to the org right past me, wide eyed with his hair all askew, wearing a blue jacket along the lines of what a yachtsman would be wearing with a big open collared white shirt with one of the tails hanging out . He stopped at each hallway with his hands on his hips, as if he were impatiently looking for someone.

    Then he stood erect, and began talking about things like the galaxies and space invasions as if someone was there in the area listening to him but no one was there but me and it became apparent that he was not
    talking to me, especially since he was ignoring my asking him if I could help him, like I was the receptionist since there was none there.

    He did not seem to be of his right mind, and I became concerned. I walked back to the book area, pretended to be straightening up the books and such, while working by way to the empty reception desk chair, where
    I picked up the phone, pushed 0, hoping somoene would answer it. It rang and then a human voice answered “Switchboard” I then whispered “We have a problem in the reception area. HCO BRING ORDER please.”, hoping the nut in the hall didn’t hear me. I also hoped the person on the phone believed me, too, lol

    I waited patiently for someone to come and help, watching as this man saluted some nonexistent person he was conversing with. I wanted to make sure I could prevent anyone from walking into him as they rounded the
    slight corner of the hall by the bookstore where he stood, because that hall lead to the Div 6 area. Finally I heard foosteps rushing down the other hall. I went to the bookstore area and looked there seeing the ASHO Dir & R who was looking at me. I motioned towards the disturbed man just up ahead. The Dir I & R stops short, motioning for me to come over to the area where he’s standing in and then motioned for me to walk with him back in the direction of his office. He then stops halfway doen that hall and whispers in my ear. “It’s ok. That’s Cap’t Bill Robertson.” He then told me that’s Bill is a former high ranking Sea Org member who comes visits the orgs once
    in a while, that he’s an old timer who is a friend of LRH ‘s! ”

    I guess I was supposed to be impressed but I wasn’t.

    I said, “Are you kidding me? The man appears delusional! Please, go talk with him because you can’t have him talking to himself like that in the hallway near Div 6. It’s out-PR, no matter how important he is!”

    And so he did; addressing him as “Sir”, he invited him to join him in his office to chat and have some coffee, which Cap’t Bill readily accepted.

    After they left, I called the switchboard operator again and asked her to get HCO to get someone to man reception & bookstore because I was a public who needed to buy a book but the place was still unmanned and
    there was no one to take my money.

    I never forgot that day or Capt’ Bil Robertson. That was sometime in 1981. I saw many more crazy things in the PAC area after that day, but none as unique as that.”

    What saddens me is that Bill had a beautiful voice, which he abused and wasted by smoking and with that tremelo type vibrato he had going on sometimes.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tremolo
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vibrato

    That voice could have taken him many places, far more adventurous than where he ended up.

    • SP ‘Onage

      Fear and loathing in LA Org! I bet the walls were melting around him. I think this guy did what the dormouse said, ” Feed your head.” Seriously, Capt Bill looks like he took one too many mescalin trips.

    • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

      Mary_McConnell wrote:

      “I said, ‘Are you kidding me? The man appears delusional! Please, go talk with him because you can’t have him talking to himself like that in the hallway near Div 6. It’s out-PR, no matter how important he is!’

      Well said Mary!

      And that summarizes what we in RTC feel like when Tom Cruise starts babbling to the wall or an ashtray on about he is going to save the planet when in fact, he couldn’t even maintain control of Paramount.

      C’mon Tom!

      A thetan can either hold a position in space or he can’t.

      And so yes, it looks like Tom Cruise is on the Capt Bill trajectory to Marcabia; and this is why Fleet Admiral Miscavige has had to put some distance between himself and Tom Cruise in the past few years.

      Fleet Admiral David Miscavige doesn’t want to be around when Tom Cruise goes Type III and starts asking cigarette machines for directions to Mars.

      • FistOfXenu

        LOL – and here I thought nothing could add to my lols at the stuff TonyO posted.

  • sizzle8

    Love it!

    Thanks Jon. Thanks Tony.

  • Tony, great post today. I am grateful whenever you post recordings of Hubbard speaking his spiel. it’s always fascinating to listen to that lunatic, with the childish giggle, chuckling with grotesque elation about buckets of split blood while his enraptured audience laughs along at his idiotic jokes. I must say though that Captain Bill was very charismatic. He electrified a room the old fashioned way — Elmer Gantry style.

  • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

    Fleet Admiral David Miscavige was on galactic patrol last month atop the Complex.

    The Fleet Admiral spotted no Marcab ships over Los Angeles.

    Conclusion: The Church of Scientology has safepointed Los Angeles from a Marcab mass landing.

    Is your city safe?

    http://i1284.photobucket.com/albums/a563/OTVIIIisGrrr8/Scientology_zps2cd45967.jpg

    • Captain Howdy

      OTVIIIisGrrr8!, I understand that D.M keeps you up all night doing Xenu knows what, but you need to start posting your communiques at wog ST.

      • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

        wog ST?

        We have an m/u here Capt Howdy.

        Please clarify

        • 1subgenius

          Look it up.

          • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

            We looked up the term and did not find it in either the red vols or the green vols. Is the term in one of the HCOPL’s?

        • BuryTheNuts2

          Wog Standard Time would be my guess!

      • jojo neal

        Your Greatness,
        I think I have Marcabians in my attic; can you, with your enormous superpowers, help me? My daughter hears them scuttling around at night, and they’re keeping her awake.
        Oh – sorry, no, they must be some relatives of DM; squeak – er, woops.

        • Captain Howdy

          Doesn’t sound like Marcabians, more like demons. Contact the CC and ask them to send Father’s Merlin & Karras, ASAP.

          • jojo neal

            Captain, I apologize, I was trying to ask OTV and hit the wrong ‘reply’ – you were right below him. Not that I don’t value your advice. Think holy water would work? What would Ron do?

    • 1subgenius

      Roger that.

      (BTW, this whole SMERSH madness divide and conquer thing was brilliant!)

    • Missionary Kid

      The Fleet Admiral also made Los Angeles and many other large cities safe from marauding wild elephants.

      • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

        Yes, Fleet Admiral David Miscavige has done so very much to rid the world of scourge and pestilence. And yet for all of this, the ecclesiastical leader of the Scientology religion remains just a “regular guy” in so many ways:

        http://i1284.photobucket.com/albums/a563/OTVIIIisGrrr8/COBRegularGuy_zpsb1ede0e1.png

        • Missionary Kid

          I’d say he was totally regular, and an uber demonstration of the Peter Principle.

        • Captain Howdy

          “Napoleon, don’t be jealous that I’ve been chatting online with babes all day. Besides, we both know that I’m training to bea cage fighter.”

  • BosonStark

    Tory’s story at the end of the reg cycle video there, wow! Those are the people Scientology is after. Every culkin like that can be worth 25 of the little fish.

  • Sherbet

    Oh. My. God. The Galactic Patrol song (Bill’s voice notwithstanding) sounds like something written in 1955 by two 12-year-old members of the Flash Gordon Fan Club.

    As for listening to lrh, I don’t have the stomach for it right now. Maybe later. I’m still shaking my head over Atack’s text. And scns wonder why we think their “religion” is ka-razy?

  • montananut

    Sorry, completely off topic, but there is something I’m working on, and I need a quick answer. Does anyone know, is there a church, or org, anywhere in Montana? If not, where would be the closest one? Thanks, Nic

    • BuryTheNuts2

      There is a mission in Boise, Idaho.

      Closest Org is probably Seattle.

      • montananut

        Thanks. Kind of amazing that my great state has managed to avoid the void. Apparently DM isn’t aware of the awesome wealth of most of Montana, thank god.

        • BuryTheNuts2

          Ya’ll still got more millionaires per capita than any other state?

          • montananut

            probably, but with our population, we have a lot more everything per capita than most other states.

            • aquaclara

              Fewer clams per capita in Montana. Something worth celebrating.

            • montananut

              absolutely, i am very greatful.

        • pronoia

          Well you kind of made up for no Scientoligy Orgs in spades with Elizabeth Claire Prophet and her apocalyptic Church U iversal and Triumphant – I understand the remnants of it are still around! Plus didn’t Hubbard spend part of his childhood in Montana?

          • montananut

            I believe he went to high school in Helena for a couple of years, which is why I’m surprised he didn’t build any orgs here. Never heard of that cult though, may have been before my time.

  • SP ‘Onage

    My vote goes to Anonymous because the “Commission For The Lulz” endorses WhyWeProtest…and because vibrators are their friends.

  • Vistaril

    THE BUNKER: Wait a minute. You’re saying that Bill’s
    girlfriend told you he dressed in women’s clothing to receive messages
    from outer space, and hoping for an incarnation of L. Ron Hubbard to
    appear?

    JON: You seem to think there’s something unusual in
    that . . .

    Classic.

  • Sherbet

    I cannot listen to lrh. I tried, but I’m not a fan of sci fi, and this lecture is heavy on the fi. I don’t know whether to be embarrassed for him, or for his audience.

    • stateofcircle

      My thoughts exactly.

    • Missionary Kid

      He was lousy on the science, and his fiction was pretty much out of date by the time he founded $cientology. It was pretty much space opera.

  • Poison Ivy

    Tony, this is SUCH a great Saturday post! Jon Atack, Captain Bill, LRon’s Marcabian Tales, and Tori and Karen forming a girl group! I don’t know how you do it all, but thank you!!

    Best line in the whole blog today, however, came from Jon when he said “You seem to think there’s something unusual in that, which is really something, given the years you’ve spent studying the cult.”

    A little side note – this am MrPoisonIvy and myself sneaked out to an early Saturday morning movie. We ducked into “The Host” – only made it through about fifteen minutes of poorly directed, horrifyingly written Stephanie Meyer dreck – we did laugh out loud quite a bit at the dialogue, though. We were there long enough for the “Seekers” in the movie to remind me of Scientologists and leave me feeling very very creepy.

    • Captain Howdy

      The only “The Host” anybody needs to see is the 2006 horror flick directed by Joon-ho Bong. Great flick.

    • TonyOrtega

      Thank you, PI. I am really happy with how things are turning out with Jon, Vance, and Claire. You can’t imagine how excited I am when I hear from any of them for the next piece.

  • OK ..i JUST saw a scientology sign on a back of a Denver bus. The people in the car next to me were pointing and laughing at the sign . I feel all warm and fuzzy right now

  • TonyOrtega

    Wow. WWP leads OCMB by only five votes at 9:30 pm. It’s a squeaker!

    • aquaclara

      Hey, Anonymous. Wanna win?
      Vote.

  • TonyOrtega

    Eight hours to go — WWP leads OCMB by a single vote.

    • Changed my mind about abstaining – I’ve just put OCMB ahead!

      Andrew

  • stanrogers

    Them what puts their own personal and valuable asses directly on the line will always get a lot more respect from me than anyone hiding behind masks and handles. Andreas and his good works (along with others who have valiantly tie-dyed targets onto their own tee shirts) are why this is all happening.

  • MarionDee

    Somehow I find this story overpoweringly sad.

  • DeElizabethan

    I see a tie at 4 AM and that’s Excellent! Appropriate! Deserved and hope it stays that way. I voted much earlier but have been away. Love all this Tony.
    Karen and Tory are precious.
    Fascinating article with Jon.

  • TonyOrtega

    Official result: Clambake by two votes!

    • I did not attempt to influence the vote in its closing stages by bribing family members and friends to cast their votes according to my wishes.

      And even if I did, there is no proof and I could easily make an e-meter float if interrogated.

      I have only been to Chicago once and found it even more windy than Wellington.

      The only reason I know how to use proxy servers is because BBC News Online wouldn’t let me watch certain videos, particularly Formula I motor racing and gave me a stupid message: “This video is not available in your region”

      Andrew

  • TendonProblem

    Hi Tony and everyone, I watched this Galactic Patrol video before, but I thought the song is not real, made up by anonymous or something. Are you telling me that song is really written by Bill R and even sung by him?

  • I know I’m really late to say this BUT…..

    Why would anyone care about loose gravel IF THERE ARE ATOMIC MINES ON THE RACE-TRACK!?!?!?

  • Snake Plissken

    Bill Robertson is what happens to a Scientologist if they work really, really, hard and apply the ‘Tech’ correctly.

    Not many people can reap the rewards of OT the way L. Ron Hubbard and Bill Robertson did. It takes plenty of hard work, determination, and usually a history of mental illness in your family.