SUPPORT THE UNDERGROUND BUNKER
You can either make a one-time donation to the site via Paypal...

...or you can subscribe and get billed monthly:

FOLLOW ME ON
SUBSCRIBE TO OUR
E-MAIL LIST
To join our e-mail list & get daily updates on new stories, e-mail us at newstory@tonyortega.org.
RSS Feed
Click here to add The Underground Bunker to your RSS Reader

Leaving Scientology: Jon Atack Navigates the Labyrinth of Paranoia

John McMaster

John McMaster

Jon Atack is the author of A Piece of Blue Sky, one of the very best books on L. Ron Hubbard and Scientology. He now has a new edition of the book out, and on Saturdays he’s helping us sift through the legends, myths, and contested facts about Scientology that tend to get hashed and rehashed in books, articles, and especially on the Internet.

This week, the media is buzzing about a woman who left the Church of Scientology after protesting the way it interrogates and discards people, and pits members against each other. Longtime Scientology watchers, however, know that these are not new concerns about the church. And Jon Atack makes that point by telling us what he went through when he left the church in 1984…

JON: I left Scientology because a close friend of mine was declared Suppressive. Well, actually, his name was put on a list — the formal declare took rather longer. According to strict policy, there must be a Committee of Evidence before a Suppressive Person declare is issued, but, as with many others, his name went on a list and that was that. A week before, his friend Peter Shantz, who was Ethics Officer at Saint Hill had called me in and said he was concerned that our mutual friend might be declared. He wanted my help to oppose this. A week later, he called me back in to tell me the deed had been done. I asked what we were going to do about this, and was told that suppressives can be very devious. His friend of over a decade was thrown to the sharks, because his name was on a list. That was all the evidence that Shantz needed.

I spent six months sending my inquiries ever further up line, and being stonewalled. When the new International Justice Chief failed to respond, I wrote a letter to Ron, which began, “I know that L. Ron Hubbard does not receive letters addressed to him, but this is the last recourse…” The reply read, “Of course I receive my letters!” but as to my request for a Committee of Evidence for my friend, the only response was “Your letter is on my desk.”

ScientologyMythbustingFor six months, my friend had refused to communicate with me, lest I be declared, too. I wrote and explained my six month journey to nowhere, and asked questions about senior management, of which he had been part. He pointed me towards two of his friends — Ron Hopkins and Jay Hurwitz — who were local to me and could explain how the Messengers had expelled most of the executives. Ron and Jay were both declared suppressives. They were also both charming and very helpful. Neither of them spat fire nor smelled of sulphur.

I determined that I would seek out the SPs, and hear their side of the story. After all, I was OT, so I wasn’t worried about being overwhelmed by any SP! I wrote to Cyril Vosper, author of the bestselling The Mind Benders, which I had read (and dismissed) as a member of the cult. I said that we had taken Scientology out of the Church. He replied that he couldn’t imagine Scientology working outside the ‘fascist’ environment. Cyril visited, and we became good friends. He had joined in 1954, and lasted 14 years. He met Hubbard on many occasions. Scientology was a small business until the 1960s, when the Australian State of Victoria started its inquiry, and generated international publicity and interest. A number of people told me that it was accusations of black magic and the like, that attracted them to the cult.

Cyril was clever and witty. He was also self-deprecating in his humour, and, generally a compassionate man (unlike many Scientologists). If a body-router approached him, on Tottenham Court Road, Cyril would happily chat. Soon enough, he would say that he’d known Hubbard, and mischievously enjoy the awe this evoked. He would inevitably be asked for his strongest memory of the Great OT, and would say that most of all, he remembered Hubbard’s foul, stinking breath. Hubbard was afraid of dentists, so let the teeth rot in his head, Cyril would add.

I cast my net wider and found the whereabouts of the World’s First Real Clear — John McMaster. This would have been 1984, and John was living in a squalid apartment in London. I interviewed him for three hours. I remember that my first question was, “How did you get into Scientology?” and the answer began, “I was born in Durban,” and took about fifteen minutes. The next time I visited, John wanted to tape the interview for his own use, but mistakenly pressed his machine’s play button. I was surprised to hear, “I was born in Durban…” He had evidently rehearsed his answers in some detail. Add to this his theatrical enunciation (“I bring love to you, and you, and you,” which came from his lectures of two decades before). A friend interviewed him, too, and hour after hour, we got almost exactly the same words.

As a young man, John had suffered from stomach cancer and had most of his stomach removed. He was in constant pain, but then never again felt any pain in his stomach after his first auditing session. Before anyone starts boasting the fantastic effects of Scientology, it is worth pointing out that by the time I met him, he was destitute and lived on cheap wine and vodka. I never saw him eat anything, either, which was rather worrying.

John’s big secret was his homosexuality. Another of the first ten Clears (1960s style), explained to me his surprise that seven of the first ten were gay, a fact that he had often pondered, as Hubbard was well aware of this. John used to travel with his ‘secretary’ and was certainly the most successful public representative the cult has ever had (though he didn’t fare well as the cult’s rep to the UN). Many people told me how much they loved John, though not one of them had spent any time with him.

After our first meeting, I wrote to John to tell him about the Gay Theta Association. I received an incensed seven-page reply assuring me that John was most certainly not gay.

In his last few years, John was able to cash in on his celebrity in the independent movement. John had a great deal to say about ‘Tubby,’ as he called Hubbard. The gist was largely that Tubby was a very jealous man, who would seethe at the adulation John received. He was also upset that John got much better results as an auditor, doubtless because of his effusively friendly manner. Through the Fair Game period, John desperately tried to calm Tubby down, but to no effect. John protested that we should be able to communicate with SPs and that running away from them — disconnection — achieved nothing. Surely we could develop a technology to cure them, instead? Eventually, John found himself floating in the water with a broken collar bone, for three hours, and decided to do his drinking elsewhere.

For me it was the beginning of a long journey. I met over 500 ex-members while writing A Piece of Blue Sky, and read testimony, articles or books by about 150 more. According to Hubbard, SPs make up 1 in 40 of the general population, so it is strange that he chose to work almost exclusively with SPs. By the time Hubbard died, the only Hubbard-picked senior executive remaining — out of hundreds — was Norman Starkey. Everyone else from Dr Joe Winter and Don Rogers, who set up the first Dianetic Foundation, to Otto Roos and David Mayo, who had audited Hubbard, had gone. But then, the only true SP was Hubbard himself.

 
——————–

L. Ron Hubbard Settles The Ashtray Debate

On Tuesday, we raised some questions about Scientology’s “Training Routine 8,” which has participants shouting instructions at an ashtray. Scientologists are told to concentrate and get their “intention” over to the ashtray and get it to “stand up.” Scientologists will tell you that they don’t actually expect the ashtray to levitate on command.

But as in all cases with Scientology, it’s good to check with Source — founder L. Ron Hubbard. Listen to this short excerpt from a January 7, 1955 lecture that he gave, and the next time you consider TR-8, remember these words…

 

 
——————–

Posted by Tony Ortega on July 13, 2013 at 07:00

E-mail your tips and story ideas to tonyo94@gmail.com or follow us on Twitter. We post behind-the-scenes updates at our Facebook author page. Here at the Bunker we try to have a post up every morning at 7 AM Eastern (Noon GMT), and on some days we post an afternoon story at around 2 PM. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

If you’d like to help support The Underground Bunker, please e-mail our webmaster Scott Pilutik at BunkerFund@tonyortega.org

 

Share Button
  • DodoTheLaser

    Ok. This is gets stranger and stranger, big time.
    John McMaster used to call LRH “Tubby”?! OK.

    And I thought I know it all.

    May be “The Master” movie wasn’t just an allegory.
    Wow.

    Any gay/exes, please share your thoughts on this one.

    • Bob

      The Master had some pretty accurate scenes. PTA did his homework. Some of the lecture scenes are great recreations of what it must have been like. I do remember although vaguely what it was like to sit there and listen to “tubby” or the old man, as he was affectionately called, lecture.

      • Michael Leonard Tilse

        So you were at Saint Hill? or like congresses? I always wondered what it would have been like to meet him. I was so dazed that I would probably have paid to lick his boots.

        I loved the 50s vibe and style that PTA created for the film.

    • Mark

      McMaster called Tubbard “Tubby” and “Fatso” in Russell Miller’s Barefaced Messiah.

    • Missionary Kid

      I’ve been collecting Joking and Degrading nicknames that people have used for LRH on this blog, but over the short time I’ve done it, this is the first time I’ve seen Tubby. It joins the 20 others.

      • shasha40

        Is Fat Bastard on the list ? No offense to the Austin Powers character , but it fits.

        • Observer

          Enjoy!

          • Michael Leonard Tilse

            Should have used the Baron Harkonnen body from the original ‘dune’ movie. Just say’n.

            • Missionary Kid

              When I see pictures of LRH, I associate them with Baron Harkonnen. It’s apropos.

        • Captain Howdy

          More like..Fat Master

      • FistOfXenu

        How about L Ron Tubbard too?
        🙂

        • Missionary Kid

          It’s now added.

        • Missionary Kid

          I added it.

    • Bradley Greenwood

      I have a gay ex. I was the last one to figure out she was a lesbian.

      • Missionary Kid

        Of course, the stupid retort is, “So you were so bad as a man, you turned her into a lesbian.”
        We know how dumb that is.

        • Bradley Greenwood

          I must be pretty dumb… I was the first one to say that.

          • Missionary Kid

            You weren’t dumb. It was the ignorance of the times, and a common thing to say back then. It’s only a dumb statement in hindsight because you know better.

            I have a former girlfriend who’s now a lesbian. I found out about it decades afterwards. Like you and your former girlfriend, I realize I had nothing to do with it.

  • Xique

    Lrh in the recording of the elevated astray. “And gravity disappeared. I didn’t say a mock up of the ash tray, I said the ash tray.” Ooooooo , crazy.

    Jon, the part where you write and tell John of the Gay Theta Association was cute, to say the least. Guess he didn’t think so. You tell a great story.

    • Peter

      I knew John Mac, as he was usually called) when he was posted to NYC. He was one of the kindest, gentlest beings I’ve ever met. He spoke no ill of anyone. We never discussed his sexuality though it was quite clear to me he was gay. (He made no passes at me nor anyone else I knew.) As I recall, he made a number of tv and radio interviews while he was there. This was at a time when the NY Org was the first ever declared in Power, Day and Foundation, by LRH and went through an incredible expansion. Jon was recognized by cab drivers, restaurant waiters, and people on the street. He made a LOT of friends for the org. However, there was apparently no recognition or support from anyone in the SO. He was clearly a heavy drinker, mostly vodka. (It has its own distinctive smell when imbibed, so it was easy to spot.) Interesting about the “Tubby” item as I never heard John use it, only “Ron”.

      We discussed the disconnection policy a few times. I, too, thought it was damaging and pointless and we talked about the vindictiveness that was inherent in the policy. As I recall, John was posted there for 3-4 months, perhaps a bit less. I still remember him with great pleasure. He behaved (other than the drinking) as I thought a Clear should be.

      • danlocke

        Enjoying reading your comments, Peter.. here and elsewhere.

        • Peter

          Much appreciated, Dan. Thank you.

      • Xique

        Sounds like he loved NY and NY loved him. Same for the vodka. Thanks for telling of this time with him, an intriguing “1st clear”.

  • MarionDee

    How should I pronounce “Atack”? Emphasis on the first syllable or the second? Apologies for the elementary question.

    • Sherbet

      It’s a good question, and I’ve wondered the same thing, Marion. I was happy to learn, finally (from a clip here in the Bunker) how to pronounce Remini. (BTW, it’s REMini.)

    • Phil McKraken

      Think of the Aflac duck.

      (Actually, I have no idea how to pronounce it.)

      • Sherbet

        Oh, gosh, Phil McAflack’in…

    • TonyOrtega

      Accent on first syllable, long A. Like ‘payback.’

      • FLUNK_101

        There was a James Brown song called “Jon Atack!” Sadly , the record company made Brown change the title to “The Payback.”

      • MarionDee

        Thanks, Tony. I am used to asking “am I pronouncing that right?” But once, I found myself at a New York party with some high-placed publishing and stage history types attending. I asked how to pronounce Tanguay (as in vaudeville’s Eva Tanguay) and everyone exchanged glances. So I blurted out, “Come on, it isn’t as if it’s an ordinary name!”

        You are much more helpful!

        • Missionary Kid

          I had read the word voilà , but for some reason, I had read it as viola, even though I’d heard the word with its correct pronunciation and seen it used correctly multiple times.

          I did something flashy in front of my friends, and then for the finish, said “viola.” They laughed because they thought I was satirizing the French, but as soon as I said it, I realized that I’d used the wrong word.

          Because the error struck my funny bone, I then revealed my stupid mistake.

          Of course, my friends laughed again – at me.

          I enjoy it when people laugh, so it was O.K.

        • Missionary Kid

          I had read the word voilà , but for some reason, I had read it as viola, even though I’d heard the word with its correct pronunciation and seen it used correctly multiple times.

          I did something flashy in front of my friends, and then for the finish, said “viola.” They laughed because they thought I was satirizing the French, but as soon as I said it, I realized that I’d used the wrong word.

          Because the error struck my funny bone, I then revealed my stupid mistake.

          Of course, my friends laughed again – at me.

          I enjoy it when people laugh, so it was O.K.

        • grundoon

          Maybe they didn’t know either.

          • MarionDee

            Absolutely possible, grundoon. But why not say so? It’s a small-scale (no, tiny-scale) example of cult members sharing the suspicion that there is something deeply wrong about their belief, but no one will say it aloud. Too much is at stake. No one wants the foundation of their beliefs and almost every action collapse beneath them.

      • DodoTheLaser

        Poetic fucking justice.

    • Dean Blair

      I accidentally answered it in the post above. Its A tack with the A being a long A.

  • DodoTheLaser

    Perhaps Ron Hubbard and Jack Parsons explored all kinds of things.
    Which I understand, still am straight though. No offense to any gays.

    • Dean Blair

      It is pronounced A tack the first letter being a long A.

    • shasha40

      I believe they had threesomes with Jacks girlfriend as part of rituals.

      • FistOfXenu

        “Magick Masturbation” isn’t gay or straight. It’s just 1 of Tubbard’s preoccupations.

  • Bella Legosi

    About the collar bone beat down. This shows the Hub the Tub that he is abusive to those who were only trying to tell him that the SP/Disconnection policy really did nothing. It also shows the level of his megalomania.

    The only one who could change the “tech” or “improve” the “tech” was Hub and only Hub. Advise given by his officers and Clears (which Commadors are supposed to consider if they don’t want a mutiny brewing) directly lead to this mans broken collar bone. It seems as though that questioning of the policies made Hub react like his manhood and intelligence were slighted! What a reaction from a man who had no “reactive mind”!

    {Boy, what a compassionate, caring, religious leader!}

    • Sidney18511

      I believe that the hubster had John “overboarded” and he suffered the injury due to the fall.

    • shasha40

      At least we know Tiny dick was paying attention as an apprentice , he now beats them down on his own ! (ok, sometimes, with 15goons at his side)

      • Vistaril

        Well . . . acting on direct written orders from L Ron Hubbard, David Miscavige first spat in people’s faces, then moved on to slapping them, before finally getting into a full-on beat down mode. All Scientology skills are learned on a gradient process. These days, at least accordng to Debbie Cook, he seems to have graduated to L Ron Hubbard’s practise of getting others to do the actual beating. Mind you, it wouldn’t surprise me in the slightest if David Miscavige likes to keep his hand in, so to speak.

        • stillgrace

          When DM was consolidating his power, a woman (Gayle Irwin? I might be wrong on last name) complained about something obnoxious DM had done. She tried to phone it in to management from a pay phone. DM took a tire iron and tried to destroy the phone. He didn’t have much luck (smile), but succeeded in eventually removing the receiver. He did succeed in totally intimidating Gayle, though. Where’s that on the gradient scale?

          • BuryTheNuts2
            • TheHoleDoesNotExist

              ah, yes, the Great DM Phone Booth incident. Here’s a few other background on it. DM refused to get a sec check from David Mayo. Shortly afterward, instead of shapeshifting powers into Superman from a phone booth like Normal Super Heros, , Miscavige instead tried to blow the damn thing up.

              http://ocmb.xenu.net/ocmb/viewtopic.php?t=31152

            • stillgrace

              I think it’s important to keep stories like this in the media, more people need to know how he seized power through violence and intimidation. This story should run as part of at least one “Where’s Shelly” story per day. I’ll bet DM thinks he got away with disappearing Shelly. Surprise, surprise. Go Leah.

            • stillgrace

              I think it’s important to keep stories like this in the media, more people need to know how he seized power through violence and intimidation. This story should run as part of at least one “Where’s Shelly” story per day. I’ll bet DM thinks he got away with disappearing Shelly. Surprise, surprise. Go Leah.

            • Phil McKraken

              Instead every single Scientology article in the media wastes the first two paragraphs listing the names Tom Cruise, John Travolta, Kirstie Alley. I get so tired of reading those names.

            • Missionary Kid

              Look on the bright side. (of life) This associates those three clams with an unsavory organization. There’s nothing to be gained by them to be associated with Co$ in this context, is there?

          • Vistaril

            Hmmm . . . good question. Probably somewhere in between inventing Engrams and leaving children in a ship’s chainlocker for days on end.

        • MissCandle

          At least a bloodless beating does not result in bodily fluids thickly oozing down your skin. Can you tell that I cannot stand spit, the thought of spit, or the picture of spit? (unless I am brushing my teeth, of which I certainly do more in one week than lrh ever did in his lifetime)

    • FistOfXenu

      Maybe that’s the example DM follows now?

  • DodoTheLaser

    So much entheta lately. Scientology pulled it in.

    • Dean Blair

      Of course they pulled it in. They have witholds and crimes that would stand a magistrates hair on end.

    • Observer

      And they deserve every iota!

      • Michael Leonard Tilse

        The Iota, the SI unit of entheta.

  • Truthiwant

    When Ron levitated the ashtray, unfortunately there was nobody else in the room. Aw-shucks, what a pity!

    I bet the great man had some really good fishing stories:

    “But ya should ‘ave seen the one that got away, biggest fish I’ve ever have seen.”

    • BosonStark

      He says, “I had a PC lift an ashtray…” L. Ron was busy lifting smoke at the time.

      • Truthiwant

        I couldn’t work out what was said at the begining. I get it now.

        Anyway, who was this PC’s name?

        I guess all the people in the room were in awe at the lecture!

        • BosonStark

          I think the PC’s name was a fella by the name of Xenu or Xemu. He can no longer levitate ashtrays but sometimes he levitates the particles in the eternal battery in his mountain prison just for fun.

          • FistOfXenu

            Nope. Not me. I was never a pre clear and Tubbard never ran any thing on me. I can so levitate ash trays. 1 time I even levitated Tubbard. Back when his nick name was Jabba the Hub. I dangled him over a volcano for weeks til he admitted he had a 2nd wife. That’s the real reason he hates me now and tells all those lies about me.

      • FLUNK_101

        You can say that again. L. Ron was very OT when it came to cigarettes. He talked about the word “ashtray,” and how you can’t flick your ashes on a word. He talked about the cellophane wrapper from a pack of cigs. When you remove the wrapper, intact, it has the same shape as the package … imagine how hard it would be to pick up the cellophane without denting it or changing it’s shape. He said that’s same difficulty you encounter when you try to move something with your mind. It doesn’t make sense, I know, but it’s amazing how much of his bullshit has to do with smoking or ashtrays.

        • FLUNK_101

          Did you ever hear the story how Ron came to like Kools? It sounds like one of those old cigarette TV commercials. The Great OT, smoking as he gave a lecture, said, “These cigarettes have no taste.” A student in the front row said, “Here, try one of mine!”

        • Phil McKraken

          That is hilarious. He does make sure that you’re attuned to his every obsession. Like how Dianetics is all about failed abortion attempts.

        • richelieu jr

          This is what I mean when I say he is like a barstool magician– All his anecdotes, examples and demonstrations include smokes… Like a farmer might use his crops or livestock for examples or a doctor her medical equipment or the human body for Hubbard it was smokes and the occasional whiskey glass.

  • media_lush

    Tubby….. Tubsterino…. The Tubster…. Tubber Hubber Man….. Mr Tubs….. Hub Tubbery Tub….

    apologies to SNL

    • Michael Leonard Tilse

      El Lardo Butt

    • Missionary Kid

      O.K., you forced my hand. Current collected nicknames for LRH:
      Tubby
      The Hub
      Etron (turd) à la Persil
      LiarRon Humptydumpty
      Liar Ron Humpty
      Fat Fraudster
      L. Con Hubbard
      Hubtard
      Liar Ron Humbug
      Tubbard
      Marquis de Fraud
      Blubbard
      Flubhard
      Blubtard
      “Dr” L. Ron Crankenstein.
      Dr. Scrubbard
      Liver lips and a sebaceous cyst
      Hubbard the hole.
      Hubbarf
      The Hubster
      The Great Hubbardini
      Fat Bastard
      Tubsterino
      The Tubster
      Tubber Hubber Man
      Mr Tubs
      Hub Tubbery Tub
      El Lardo Butt

      • Way, way back me and a similarly irreverent friend used to call him fishlips based on his bust at the org.

        • Missionary Kid

          I’ll take it.

  • BuryTheNuts2

    He didn’t say a mock up of the ashtray. He said the ashtray!

    And no, Marty,…Xenu is not a metaphor!

    • PreferToBeAnon2

      she’s had her coffee this morning!

    • L. Wrong Hubturd

      Yeah, face it Marty…..you’re dear leader was a gas bag. No metaphors needed. It’s not too late to train as a real counselor if you want to continue to help people.

      The truth train is leaving the station, so are you gettin’ your ass on or what? We saved a spot for you….watch out for the whoppy cushion. BTN likes to play jokes.

      • FistOfXenu

        “No metaphors needed” But gas bag is a metaphor. It stands for “a bowel full of stinking gas that he reroutes out of his larynx when he talks”.

        “Whoppy” cushion? LMAO!

        • L. Wrong Hubturd

          Thanks for correcting my MU. I feel so much more theta now.

    • FLUNK_101

      Hey BTN, ever hear “Big In Japan” from “The Mule Variations,” by Tom Waits?
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uWIR9mvf-IU

      Was Scientology ever big in Japan?

      “There is no more madder nation than Japan … It’s supposed to be a terribly hard language. It’s not a hard language. It’s as simple as baby talk … do you know that two Japanese can stand together and converse with each other for a little while and then all of a sudden find out they’re talking about two entirely different things? They’re perfectly happy to have bad communication.” – LRH

      • BuryTheNuts2

        Flunk…I haven’t heard that song in years!

        Now I am gonna have to listen to the whole album.

        I went straight to Chocolate Jesus next!

      • richelieu jr

        Grat Zombie Jesus what a stupid quote! Amazing how he could denigrate entire peoples with easily disproven lies and get away with it!

        I wonder if that little gem was translated into Japanese, or if Miscarriage stuck it down a convenient memory hole?

        (in fact,there is one kind of ‘simple’ thing about Japanese, I suppose depending on how you look at it. There are only two tenses, something either happened of is happening, as I understand it. I’d like to see Elron tackle kanji and kana!)

        • Missionary Kid

          It’s a carry-over from WWII.

          • villagedianne

            Yes, Hubbard was certainly a man of his times. Racist and homophobic.

            • Missionary Kid

              I think he promoted women because they were competent, but that his basic attitude towards them, as well as everyone else, was disdain. LRH only looked at people to see what he could take from them or he could manipulate or control them.

              DM is also power hungry, but he is not as sophisticated as LRH. He operates mainly by sowing fear and chaos. People are afraid because they can lose their status at any time, and he keeps everyone competing for positions and status by moving them around. They can be transferred at any time, and that adds to the uncertainty that everyone faces.

              Ultimately, it’s not a healthy place to work, psychologically.

        • Pinkhammer

          And the tense is designated by a suffix added to the verb to make it past tense. To make the whole sentence into a question, you simply add a syllable to the end of the whole thing.

          It is a very orderly language! There are only three irregular verbs, I believe. It’s just an entirely different structure…

          Not only are there the 2 kana alphabets of around 50 characters each and thousands of kanji characters, but they read vertically from right to left And horizontally from left to right!

          Oh, I suppose you could also say their number system is simpler than ours, too. The way they name their numbers has place value built in…

          • richelieu jr

            I would so love to learn a non-Indo-European root language. But I’m getting older and the languages I speak were hard won.. I so admire people who have a true affinity for languages and an ear for the music of the language and idioms…

            • Pinkhammer

              Speaking Japanese isn’t so hard, it’s the reading and writing that will do you in!

            • richelieu jr

              Certainly my experience!

              My hardest was Russian; I tried, I tried really hard, I swear I did!

            • Pinkhammer

              A+ for effort! I’m impressed – Slavic languages are tough, indeed!

      • Missionary Kid

        LRH still carried on about Japan because of WWII. That just shows how ignorant he was and fixed in his thinking. The Hub had to always be right, even when he wasn’t.

        • FistOfXenu

          “fixed in his thinking”

          I love the irony of this MK. Take fixed in the other sense and it’s exactly what he wasn’t.

          • Missionary Kid

            Yeah, he was fucked because he wouldn’t fix his ideas.

      • cicely neville

        “No more madder”?? and he’s complaining about “bad communication”.
        Wow.
        We may safely assume that his knowledge of Japanese was comparable to his nuclear physics.

        • FistOfXenu

          No cicely. It was worse. If you listen to the video Tony posted {it’s obvious he knew ALL about gravity right?} But he didn’t know shit about Japanese.

          • cicely neville

            (You guys, I have THINGS TO DO. Stop being so much fun!)
            No, FOX, no! I CANNOT listen to his dulcet tones. I have a very delicate stomach. Really, I can’t stand the sound of his voice, not just what he says.
            It’s been said of the beautiful diva Anna Moffo that if chocolate mousse had a voice, it would sound like her.

            Now, if ipecac had a voice….

            • richelieu jr

              For me he sounds like blackberry brandy someone pissed in– Sickly sweet, a bit intoxicating and nauseating at the same time, with just hint of something nasty that shouldn’t be there…

            • cicely neville

              It’s hard to describe; unctuous, pompous, droning – i’m sure he deliberately droned because it had a hypnotic effect. Rambled on for the same reason. listening to him for me is like eating soup with a fork; soup that is starting to go bad. It tastes funny, and then you find yourself throwing up.

    • FistOfXenu

      Thanks BTN.

  • sugarplumfairy

    Thanks.. I’ve always been really curious about John McMasters..

  • TheHoleDoesNotExist

    Check out “Scientology in the United Kingdom” Wikipedia and find 1984 references. You will always find Hubbard’s true motivations for his actions by comparing whatever trouble he was in from the law. In UK Hub was denied request to lift foreign sci, on religios basis once again because he Was convicted in France, and wouldnt answer up. then there was the lawsuit about disconnection resulti g in the famous opinion of sci by Judge Latey. So of course Hub had to make Hub Right, which meant he had to Keep the Disconnect policy And He Had to be surrounded by plotting SP’s. See?

  • Dean Blair

    I enjoyed this article very much. My mother thought highly of John McMaster and had gone to several of his lectures when he was touring the US in the 60s. Finding out that John called Hubbard Tubby and Fatso is priceless.

    A good part of being able to “break away” from the Scientology mindset for me was being able to see it’s leader Tubby in a new light without the respect and awe that had been ingrained in me after so many years in the cult. At one point in my exit from Scientology I came to the conclusion that I was a much better person than Tubby and that he was not the genius and humanitarian that I had been led to believe.

    Thank you John Atack for your inquisitiveness and persistence in writing the true story about Scientology and it’s leader Fatso.

    • Missionary Kid

      I’ll add it.

    • Vistaril

      A good part of being able to “break away” from the Scientology mindset
      for me was being able to see it’s leader Tubby in a new light without
      the respect and awe that had been ingrained in me after so many years in
      the cult.

      Respectfully offered to you as part of your healing process . . .

      (Hat Tip: Sponge . . . come back, come back, where ever you are)

      • loulai

        Perfectly splendid!!!!! Thanks!

      • Marie Claire Wolf

        Oh! but what a tiny weeny dickie!

  • Bradley Greenwood

    The reason I am not called “Tubby” is that I am much too fat. I prefer “Lard Monster”. Also, I am the same height as Tom Cruise. But this is where the similarities end… MY cult would have been much more fun!

    • BuryTheNuts2

      We have no doubts on that!

      • Bradley Greenwood

        First-off, I’d be the only man… can’t take them seriously.

    • richelieu jr

      Short as Tom Cruise, yet fat?

      Get in line, ladies! Thinkn of it, we could roll you around like a short beach ball!

      Man, I am sure your cult would have been much more fun because even though you clearly exagerrate, you’re funny, self-deprecating and you don’t blow yourself up — erm, wait a minute.

      Plus $cientology is fun like trp to the dentist’s, less beneficial, and much more expensive!

      Still, you get my gist! Sign me up!

      • Bradley Greenwood

        I like the dentist… it’s the urologist I could do without 🙁

        • PreferToBeAnon2

          There is a reason why you like the dentist better than the urologist: it’s your jaw-clam heritage. It’s in the genes, not the jeans.

    • MissCandle

      I can tell by your av

    • I’m envisioning someone like the Buddha. Sounds cute!

  • BuryTheNuts2

    Off this topic, but I love Business Insider and this is my favorite header yet on Remini.

    http://www.businessinsider.com/leah-remini-leaves-scientology-2013-7

    • TheHoleDoesNotExist

      so Rinder is claiming her as a hubster luvin’ Indie? I’ll wait for her to speak.

      • BuryTheNuts2

        I don’t believe that one bit. I think she is done.
        She has already said she is Catholic on twitter, more than once.

    • PreferToBeAnon2

      Does anyone have any news on this: “Police Patrol Car Called at Ex Scientologist Leah Remini’s House in Studio City” from last night? Wondering if OSA struck…

      http://www.newspusher.com/EN/post/1373684041-2/police-patrol-car-called-at-ex-scientologist-leah-remini-s-house-in-studio-city.html?utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=twitter

    • FistOfXenu

      “Another PageSix source explained, “Because Leah threatened to call the police to find Shelly, she was put through ‘Security Checking,’ her family was put through it, and her friends.”

      Wow! And she did spoke out against the abuse before it happened to her and for the sake of some body else. Who’s gonna break it to The Hero that a girl has bigger balls and better sense of right and wrong than a $cientology Warrior?

  • BuryTheNuts2

    “Neither of them spat fire nor smelled of sulphur.”

    Jon strikes again!
    He gets at least one good zinger in each time. I love Saturdays!

    • richelieu jr

      REDACTED (now it can be told!):

      “There was however one strange odor, which no one took credit for and one of them blamed on the ‘Dog’,which, as far as I could wee, consisted only of him covering his mouth with the napkin and making growling sounds. “What hath Hubbard wrought?” thought I…”

      • Michael Leonard Tilse

        Speaking of… I was in the Key To Life courseroom at AOLA. This was during the early public release days, so the room was full of students.

        Suddenly, some students in one corner started laughing, trying very hard to keep it quiet. Then, spreading outward, like a wave spreading on a puddle, more and more students started laughing. I looked up to see what was going on just as it passed by me. One of the rankest, disgusting silent but deadly farts ever. It was so bad all you could do was laugh.

        • richelieu jr

          Yipes! Think of the engrams!

        • richelieu jr

          You know what they say, MIchael:

          “He who posts a story about the fart years after the fact for an audience of squirrels and wogs
          Is a boasting SP leaving out the part in fear his potty mouth will admit he deal that pearl and blamed it on the dogs.”

          -Confusedshus

          • Michael Leonard Tilse

            Ah, I have been guilty of many things, to my sorrow and shame, but that despicable act was not one of them.

            “Sir, I do not know whether I will die on the gallows or of the pox, but that depends on whether I embrace your principles or your mistress.” (apologies to John Wilkes)

        • RMycroft

          Someone was just blowing off Charge.

          • TheHoleDoesNotExist

            It was widely known as the EP (end phenomena) of Sea Org rice and beans diet.

    • MissCandle

      Do rotten teeth (ie, lrh) smell anything like sulphur? I know the sulphur smell, but not the smell of rotten teeth. I’ve never had to know the answer to this before, but now I”m curious.

  • PreferToBeAnon2

    Jon, thanks for filling in all of the blank spots, particularly shedding light on the ultimate fate of some of these pioneers. Thinking about how McMaster ended up–destitute and living in a squalid apartment on cheap wine and vodka–but yet still trying to put on the front with the practiced spiel. Dealing with Scientology while also dealing with being gay in those times had taken its toll. It’s all terribly sad; the potential of great people snuffed. I’m glad Tony presents both the cautionary and the inspirational here.

    • shasha40

      Wow, Clear yet living in squalor , much like lrh at the end, except he deserved it.

      • Vistaril

        Not really. The motorhome L Ron Hubbard died in was a top-of-the-line, very comfortable mobile bedroom parked up on farmland that he owned. He had all his cooking and clearning done for him, had a full time personal nurse, he dressed in the finest fabrics, and was surrounded by boxes of cash, gold bullion, all sorts of other, real treasures and gizmos, not to mention his personal menagerie of exotic animals. That L Ron Hubbard died alone, with only thieves and thugs left to find his corpulent corpse, completely insane, and screaming at his imaginary Body Thetans is certainly a form of rough justice and a deserved karma, but does not mean that his living conditions were in any way squalid.

        • MissCandle

          Thanks for your insight, V

    • MissCandle

      But I thought you weren’t/aren’t allowed to be gay in S-Lying-Tology? If McMaster and most of the very early clears don’t de-bunk (pun intended) that theory/rule, then why was our Derek demeaned and why is John Travolta still wearing a beard? (btw: did you notice his chin hair is getting smaller?)

      • You aren’t allowed to have any kind of healthy sexuality in Scientology.

        • MissCandle

          I get your point Lliira, but please do not think that I was implying that gay sexuality is not healthy. I

          • Oh, I didn’t. I was just… expanding on what you said, I suppose. Not arguing.

        • Michael Leonard Tilse

          There is such thing as healthy sexuality? Tell me more….

          • 1subgenius

            “Doctor, is sex supposed to be dirty filthy and disgusting?”
            “Yes, if you’re doing it right.”
            (Woody Allen?)

          • Captain Howdy

            I grew up on dirty magazines and the Marquis de Sade. I have no idea about this “healthy sexuality” rumor and I don’t care to. Like the man said “sex without sin is like waffles without syrup”.

          • Kitz

            Demonstrations teach more than lectures.

          • FistOfXenu

            There certainly is, and me and Mrs FOX don’t do demonstrations. 😉

        • TheHoleDoesNotExist

          Actually, straight sex and booze were perfectly acceptable until Miscavige stamped his own perversion on the scam.

  • richelieu jr

    ‘Fascist environment”? You mean AFTER Miscavige right? They must have been traveling in Time, because everything was free and people were treated like angels, and Hubbard rode around on a unicorn named Daisy-Belle on deck fishing people OUT of the water, not throwing them in!

    Ashtrays floated like bubbles int he air, and everyone sucked the refreshing, nutritious mint-sented air from the free Kool cigarettes that were handed out by topless chorus girls, each and everyone named Happy, and Oh! Yes, they were! So Happy!

    Hubbard’s first a Second wives (there was not third) held hands and read to each-other from the Pompatus of Love as a nude ‘Tubby’ floated above, like a corpulent, benevolent Cupidon shooting little heart-arrows at his wonderful, loyal crew, instantly marrying them in the eyes of Ron and sending them into 2nd dynamic bliss…

    Homosexuality lifted not it’s Breck-scented, Sassoon-styled head, and death was but a dream.

    Is that Clear?

    If only there were ome Warrior who saw tings as thye were and could hold his torch of faithfulness high, having proved his good-will to the Beaked-One Himself… But where would we find such a man,and would he be cheaper than regular $cientology, which has really gotten out of hand, what with the constant regging and scandals and I constantly feel like I’m lying to my family and friend,s but most of am myself and I am sure IF RON WAS HERE he’d never allow this, but that little Rat, Miscavige and did you see that medal they gave Cruise? “Most Dedicated Scientologist!!!! Was he kidding? He looked like a little Indiana Jones hiding behind the gong in Temple of Doom,a s he practialcly ahd to roll the thing off-stage after he rcieved it!And do you know, I heard that the Scilon schools are just there to c-vacuum up our kids in to the SeaOrg where they only ear rice and beans when they’re not in the RPF, which, between you and I— $cientology is practicly a C-U-L-T these days!

    RATHBUN TAKE ME AWAY!!!!!!!!!!

    • PreferToBeAnon2

      I highly recommend a little Cardinal with your breakfast–sure torques one up!

      • BuryTheNuts2

        I need more coffee so I can read that again…my damn brain was having trouble keeping up!

      • L. Wrong Hubturd

        I think the Cardinal HAS had a little something with his breakfast. Or too little sleep…

        • Captain Howdy

          He’s on a higher spiritual plane than you or me. Now fall to your knees and pray he absolves you!

        • richelieu jr

          No sleep at all, as certain people in these parts can attest…

          “Sleep is for sissies! Soup is good food”

          • L. Wrong Hubturd

            Are you practicing for your Sea Org infiltration? Are you an operative of celeb sci blog now?

            • richelieu jr

              Nope, I’ve just had sleep problems since I was a baby…..

            • ParticleMom

              I assumed it was the baby. My little one is practically on Miscavage time.

            • richelieu jr

              No, the baby was thins night, actually! He’s never done one of these all)night fit things until last night and…PHEW! No more of that, please!

              I’m pretty sure that will be the only time. We spoke it over and he seemed to pretty much agree and be over it so…

    • ze moo

      “Pompatus of Love” steve miller band

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PmVusVh4TRQ

      • TheHoleDoesNotExist

        Pompatus? That’s what he was saying? I wondered about that. What the hell is Pompatus?

      • richelieu jr

        That’s the one, baby!

      • ThetaBara

        Sadly, Miller ripped the whole thing off an old blues guy, denied it when called out, then was faced with actual proof. What an ass. Kinda ruined it for me.

        • JonathanRoberts

          The Rolling Stones among many stole their entire catalog of music off of the Blue’s artists of the period and before nothing new here.

      • Sidney18511

        Reminds me of all the hours and hours of my stoned youth I spent wondering just what the hell he was saying in that song. I can now celebrate! Anyone care to partake in a MU doobie?

    • Lurkness

      I hope Tony will eventually apply his journalism skills to the revelations that broke out at Marty’s place over the original OTVIII materials where Hubbard apparently claimed he was the anti-Christ and the “historic Jesus”, not the R6 implant, was a homosexual and pedophile. Explosive stuff and more on that in a bit! http://markrathbun.wordpress.com/2013/07/03/dangerous-thoughts/#comment-271527

      Marty was clearly shocked by the confirmations by George White and Bob Grant that the HCOB said just that when they took the original OTVIII course in 1988. See also Jesse Prince statement. Apparently some OT’s instantly blew because of the materials and DM was running around like his hair, but not his pants, were on fire. After this a lot of editing of tapes and bulletins took place to change the OTVIII materials. Jesse Prince statement here: http://www.ezlink.com/~perry/CoS/Theology/JesseOT8.htm

      Be careful Tony, while the original OTVIII materials were not protected by a wall of fire, they will
      cause your spontaneous combustion if not handled properly!

      For the rabbit holers among us, see also:
      http://factnet.org/node/1726/

      http://scientologycelebrity.wordpress.com/2013/07/07/is-lrh-the-antichrist-was-jesus-a-marcabian-spy/

      • richelieu jr

        Can you give us a summary (I have my Sat Night reading cut out for me alright!)

      • ParticleMom

        Interesting little rabbit hole…thanks for posting.

        • Lady Squash

          Does anyone know how we could verify the veracity of this particular rabbit hole? It is really too weird. But if it’s true, it should be front page news.

          • Lurkness

            Tony said later in the comments that it’s on his to-do list, but a lot of hot, current issues to get to first. Would seem it might also be good for his book too. Amazing all that he gets done and the news that he regularly breaks. Thanks, Tony!!!

    • cicely neville

      Haven’t had enough coffee yet to sustain this brilliance. And I’m wondering what you’ve had !

    • FistOfXenu

      99.44% pure brilliance Cardinal, like Ivory soap. {Now I understand! L Ron Tubbard was the true best friend and savior of man kind but the ebil Dwarfenfuhrer spoiled every thing and turned The Truth of the Glorious Path to Freedom into slavery.} I am a fan, sir.

      Just 1 thing: “Hubbard’s First and Second wives (there was not third)” But you got that wrong. Tubbard said 1st and 3rd wives and said he never had a 2nd.

      • richelieu jr

        Well I was saying it from his POV– He wouldn’t very well say “This is my third wife, there was no second…” although with that idiot, who knows?

        • Robert Eckert

          He did, actually, say that.

          • richelieu jr

            You mean in that English documentary?

            I do remember him saying that, but it seemed (a clear lie but) different in context.. HAve to watch it again..

    • Simple Thetan

      Tell me more about the topless girls handing out cigarettes.

  • Randy Hildebrand

    tubby sounds stoned

    • Captain Howdy

      Indeed he does.

      • ze moo

        A fist full of pink and greys washed down with rum will do that to you.

        • Captain Howdy

          I can attest to that!

  • TheHoleDoesNotExist

    In the US in 1984 there were only 3 kinds of scientologists:

    1) RPFers
    2) SP’s
    3) EX’s / Escapees

    • Missionary Kid

      What about the Celebrities? Maybe they were just fakes?

      • TheHoleDoesNotExist

        Oh yes. Thanks for remembering them. Most of the arteests that I knew back then were the First to escape! But most I knew weren’t A listers at all. Remember, this was the era when certain books, movies were getting banned, TV was baaaad, and artists were deemed dilettantes who really needed to get their ethics in and become auditors (unless they were already famous and rich, and then…never mind, carry on).

        • Missionary Kid

          Thanks.

  • Observer

    For non-US Bunkerites who may not be familiar with American schoolyard taunts, there’s one which goes “Liar, liar, pants on fire!”

    • BuryTheNuts2

      How do you keep topping yourself?

      • Observer

        I have to give credit to Ron. With his ludicrous lies and all those smarmy, faux-heroic photographic poses he provides an unending fount of inspiration. I’m glad people enjoy seeing them as much as I enjoy creating them.

        Criminal J&D is extremely rewarding!

        • BuryTheNuts2

          Well I (for one)…feel like I get a present every time you load a shoop.
          Very well done, Observer.
          You are awesome.

          • Captain Howdy

            Yep, O’s shoops are as much fun as a box of Cracker Jacks.

            • FLUNK_101

              A surprise in every box!

          • Poison Ivy

            It’s almost as if you can be a bit fond of the old coot when you just accept that he was an 100% charlatan; a carnival barker; an imposter. (But then, there’s Paulette Cooper, and the guy on the deck with the peanut, and the three year old in the chain locker….and he ain’t so loveable anymore..)

          • Michael Leonard Tilse

            Observer brings us ‘present time’.

        • shasha40

          Outstanding, as usual ! We Live for your Sooper shoops !

        • George Layton

          Thank you for making me laugh every time I read one of your posts.

    • PreferToBeAnon2

      brilliant!

    • TheHoleDoesNotExist

      Awesomeness, seriously.

    • MissCandle

      EX-cellent

    • FLUNK_101

      Awesome!

    • Michael Leonard Tilse

      Liar, Liar, Pantalones en Fuego.

      • Bradley Greenwood

        Verdad!

      • HelluvaHoax!

        Brilliant! Hilarious!

        Okay, everyone, time for Chinese School!

        Liar Liar
        Pants on Fire
        Knowingness as wrong as a rudiment flyer.

    • Lurkness

      Finally listened to Bunker’s interview of Brian Culkin. Brian did have a great line: Robbers take your money or your life; Scientology takes your money and your life.

      • BuryTheNuts2

        Well don’t give him any credit for it. I think Bob Minton said it first!

        • Lurkness

          BTW, he didn’t claim the line in the video as his own. My fault for not being really “clear.”

        • Lurkness

          nice work too BTN @THR.

    • FistOfXenu

      *stands up and breaks into ovation and whistling*

    • SP ‘Onage

      Brilliant, like always! Keep it up!

    • richelieu jr

      Menteur, menteur, pantalon en feu!

    • richelieu jr

      Excellent, Obserever..

      If I may, (from right to left) The Thruth Rundown:

      “Forgot there are no Blackfoot Indians, only BlackFEET ones. Sorry bro!”
      “3 Week vacation with dad thought llamas sounded ‘Weird, like Bullfrogs.”
      “Failed one Nuclear Physics class, did see a doctor on occasion for testosterone for L Ron’s floppy little Hubbard”
      “Wore a hat and masturbated on plate whilst reading Aleister Crowley and watching his friend fuck his girlfriend in order to bring Anti-Christ (“MoonChild”). Crowley calls him an idiot.”
      “Ulcers brought on by guilt over losing command after ‘sinking’ a U-Boat disguised as a Mexican island. Treated and malingering dismissed. Symptoms disappear as soon as no more cash is forthcoming.”
      “Had Ashtray. Put feet on desk at least three times.”

      • Bella Legosi

        “”Wore a hat and masturbated on plate whilst reading Alaster Crowley and
        watching his friend fuck his girlfriend in order to bring Anti-Christ
        (“MoonChild”). Crowley calls him an idiot.”=-=-=-=-Is his the reason behind the rumors about Suri? I heard two different theories about it. But what I quote about brought it to mind.

        • richelieu jr

          The only place I head the Suri stuff from really was the unauthorised Cruise Bio, and then only from quotes I heard in the media and around these parts…
          The ‘moon child’, masturbation and Crowley rolling his eyes in exasperation at those clowns is well documented..
          It is true that the whole organized rush to get TC a scilon squeeze ASAP has a kind of ROsemary’s Baby vibe to it… What’s the rush? And why is the Tiny Criminal’s sperm suddenly operational (lots of possible explanations for this, of course, like ha stopped using condoms.)

          • pronoia

            And that it was Nicole who had issues — not conceiving, but miscarrying — and Katie didn’t.

    • Bella Legosi

      We need to set you up a Go Fund Me Account and donate! You gots what they call talent!

    • lisacarolfremont

      Another truthshoop! Gorgeous. So timely as I’m in the LRH bio chapter of Jon’s book! Jon’s book is a revealing and brave portrait of his experience in scientology and why after his many years of faithfully following this program he felt compelled to leave. Thank you Jon Atack!

  • Bradley Greenwood

    I visited Maharishi International University in Iowa, where I was to see “yogic flying”. Indeed, they flew… just like ashtrays.

    • Captain Howdy

      Well, they observed it to be true that they were flying, so who are you to question their truthiness?

      • Bradley Greenwood

        Something felt “oily”.

        • Captain Howdy

          Do oily fish fly?

      • FistOfXenu

        Ass bouncing? Hah!

  • Vistaril

    Ahhh . . . yes, good ole 9ACC19 – 5501C07 (Renumbered 21 for “The Solution To Entrapment” cassettes), from now on also known as “The Levitating Ashtray Lecture”. On its surface, the lecture appears another stumbling, rambling tortured excuse for utter claptrap. At a deeper level, and with the understanding we have now of what L Ron Hubbard was really up to, it becomes apparent that particular slice of scripture is, in essence, a rationale for NOT paying attention to people (like academics and doctors) who think about things or, even worse, actually be a person who thinks about things. This is because, according to L Ron Hubbard, in the process of thinking one descends from a spiritual state to a condensed material state. In fact, it was a subtle implant telling Scientologists to stop thinking about what L Ron Hubbard was actually saying, and just do what he told them.

    As with most L Ron Hubbard lectures, it does ramble on and cover all sorts of unrelated nonsemse. There is, for example, a brief diatribe about European vs US movies, daring tales of L Ron Hubbard at sea and ashore on foreign shores, and so on. There really is all sorts of idiocy in there. So far as the levitating ashtray is concerned, the {science} involved has to do with the power of communication. As the extract provided above highlights, so long as a “particle” is willing to receive communication, the laws of physics can be overcome. Wonderful. Moving on from this {discovery} in his rambling style, L Ron Hubbard next detaisl how this information, the power of communication when used by a Scientologist, can be used to kill someone in what he describes as . . .

    ” . . . a death process, the first one I’ve ever really come up and described. I have described PDH to you, and so forth. But this is real – a real death process. This is much worse than PDH . . . [Ask the person concerned over and over again to] . . . “give me some things you don’t have to go into communication with . . . “

    . . . spooky, cue Twilight Zone theme.

    So why am I rambling on myself? Well, I’ve hit the brandy again, but in reviewing this lecture, it struck me: if focussing a person’s attention on who and what not to communicate with is a “real death process”, then what is the PTS/SP Doctine? All that doctrine does is provide Scientologists with a list of people and things (i.e., the internet, the media, etc) they cannot communicate with? In effect, the PTS/SP Doctrine is itself, according to L Ron Hubbard Scientology scripture, a “death process”.

    Nice one, Tubby. Trouble is, in using the PTS / SP Doctrine to tell people who they don’t have to go into communication with, you may have killed a few of your Scientologists but, ultimately, it is Scientology itself which will die as a result. Good job.

    • TheHoleDoesNotExist

      So…. it is the stubborn Ashtray’s fault that I couldn’t get it to friggin Stand Up. It simply wasn’t Willing to talk! Well, now it all makes perfect, logical sense. And scientific too!

      • Michael Leonard Tilse

        Silly, it’s not supposed to talk. {You were doing it wrong!}

      • shasha40

        Bahahahahaha ! Gas ! So that’s how The Hole works, huh? Beans, rice, gas = levatating ashtrays !

    • shasha40

      There’s no place like home, there’s no place like home ! Vistaril , thank you for reminding me I was In the Twilight Zone ! The horrifying thing is I understood it, as much as gibberish can be understood …

      • Vistaril

        And I thank all Exes, yourself included, for being here and sharing your experiences so that others might learn. I think none the less of you for having “understood”. In my youth, I was an altruistic and spiritually inquisitive searcher of truth, not quite wracked with existential quandaries, yet certainly willing to accept that things are not as they appear to the physical senses. Rebelling against the prevailing orthodoxy, I suspect, is almost a universal rite of passage, and one I experienced intensely. Still do, sometimes. My rebellion was, in some ways, just as destructive personally and socially as Scientology, and involved its own gibberish, but, luckily, lacked the infrastructure required for it to persist much past my 20s. Forgive me if I seem to take the piss too often, or appear too harsh in my comments, or reignite unwelcome emotions, for I accept without equivocation I too could have fallen into Scientology’s clutches. Accordingly, and, as with most exes I encounter, I often mutter to myself that quiet meditation: “there but for the grace of God. . . “

        • TheHoleDoesNotExist

          We were all young once. Those of us who were young without wifi and cable lived in a completely different world.

        • Missionary Kid

          Amen. I got my inoculation against rigid orthodoxy by being raised in fundamentalist Christianity and rejecting it, and fortunately, Dianetics didn’t take with my oldest sister.

          Those two events have me saying as an atheist, “there but for the grace of god…” too.

        • Peter

          And now, of course, quantum physics and mechanics have come along to demonstrate that the prevailing orthodoxy doesn’t prevail!! ROFL And so it goes in this majickal universe!

        • shasha40

          I Love your post , but I was never in,and like yourself have much Respect for all exes, they are Real Heroes in my eyes too.

  • Ms. B. Haven

    ***I wrote a letter to Ron, which began, “I know that L. Ron Hubbard does not receive letters addressed to him, but this is the last recourse…” The reply read, “Of course I receive my letters!” but as to my request for a Committee of Evidence for my friend, the only response was “Your letter is on my desk.”***

    As I recall, this was called Standing Order #1, You Can Always Write to Ron. I actually fell for that horseshit once myself. I received a reply too, but it was obviously not from Hubbard. Standing Order #1 was utilized by a lot of my friends during the ‘coup of ’82. It provided a nice list of people to ‘handle’, no one who wrote to Hubbard got any results at all, but they were invited to visit with their friendly ethics officer.

    This would be a good technique for scientologists to employ these days. If I remember correctly, when Hubbard died, Standing Order #1 didn’t go away, you could still write, but the letters went to ED Int. Guillaume Lesevre. Perhaps current members could write to Mr. Lesevre if they have any unresolvable issues, but if reports that come into the Bunker are to be believed, Mr. Leserve has his own difficulties to deal with these days called ‘The Hole’.

    Maybe scientologists could write to ED Int, or the President of the Church of Scientology, or the Spokesperson, or? What, these positions aren’t filled these days? Maybe instead of asking pesky questions that you have no fucking rank to ask, like “where’s Shelly”, you could just ask “where’s Heber?” or “who is the President these days?” If you do, get ready to pay for a bit of sec-checking to sort things out. Heaven for bid there be free and open communication and honest inquiries.

    • TheHoleDoesNotExist

      you wont get any reply anymore. last friend I knew said it took her one year to hear bsck from Ed Int and it didnt sound like him. this was I think around 2007.

      • stateofcircle

        Well since The Great and Powerful All Knowing All Seeing Immaculate Highness His Midgetsy bestowed upon his flock the groundbreaking, perfect and 100% on source Golden Age of Tech and Knowledge 1 through 6,246,743,098, I am not sure how your friend or anyone for that matter would have any problems or questions, since He Who Should Probably Wear Lifts removed any wrong or even ambiguous processes, datums, comms, policies and issues. The fact that she or anyone else has any questions whatsoever is indicative of her being at best PTS, but most likely a criminal, and a stupid one at that. Obviously she did not purchase The Basics and redo her steps and processes like lolliCOB commanded. If she did, she wouldn’t be an out-ethics backflasher.

        • grundoon

          MK, two more for your list:
          His Midgetsy
          He Who Should Probably Wear Lifts

          • Missionary Kid

            Done.

    • Roger Larsson

      “I wrote some letters to Ron and suddenly he died, it was not on purpose.”

      1983-84 an issue written by Ron circulated in organizations in where he said that a girl had ran away and told the outside world that he didn’t read our letters. How insane she was. He got several sacks of letters each week he answered.

      I saw immediately that he hadn’t written this issue. This issue created a crack in-between me and LRH.

      When I was investigating this thing pre-printed letter-paper with the head “Dear Ron” were available at the orgs. The head “Hi Ron” wasn’t appropiated.

    • Racnad

      I once wrote a letter to Ron & got a response. We should all post them sometime.

      • BosonStark

        Kids, you can still write to Ron! Just address your letters to:

        L. Ron
        Implant Station
        Mars

        • Michael Leonard Tilse

          Yes, they burn them so he can read them in the ashterlife.

          • stateofcircle

            badum psshhhh

          • Roger Larsson

            It’s the truth, Evidence is burned in angry moments towards the cult. When I left the cult in the 90’s I burned it all. Monica Ferry and all the other staff in Ron Hubbards personal office answered his letters as him.

        • stateofcircle

          What’s the zipcode on Target Two?

          • FistOfXenu

            8-8008

    • Douglas D. Douglas

      Do they still print anything like this in the front of the books? This is from a 1977 paperback edition…

      • Observer

        I bet his trousers burst into flames when he wrote that.

    • grundoon

      L. Ron Hubbard wrote up some of his own hat in HCO POLICY LETTER OF 22 FEBRUARY 1965 – EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR COMM LINES. About Standing Order #1, he says…

      The SO #1 line (formerly only for LRH addressed mail) is the public and general incoming mail line to LRH, MSH and the Executive Director and is watched and kept in order by the Executive Director. It is a very important line in that no major org breakdown has ever occurred without being preceded by entheta SO #1 mail from that area! One can estimate the condition of service, admin and tech, (dominantly the latter), from the character of SO #1 letters from an area. A year before the Victorian Enquiry SO #1 from the Melbourne area went bad and stayed bad. Thus this SO #1 line, we learn from this and other instances, is an important index of the character of Scientology operation in an area.

      The SO #1 line is used by the Executive Director as an alerting bell, not as a subject to be responding to directly. SO #1 answers are severely regulated by policy-the maxim is “Give them what they want and keep them happy.” Respond casually to entheta, or non-commitally.

      Forward complaints received to the org or auditor involved for their or his or her comment. Forward the response from the org or auditor to the originator, when it comes if it is politic to do so or condense it if it is not, as a second letter, the first written at once is only an ack. Never let Orgs use the SO #1 line as a sales line. Never let a critical letter go to anyone in answer to an SO #1. Just listen and understand. Ask SO #1 writers for clarification if you don’t understand and want to. Keep the line itself all “Good Roads and Good Weather” (which everybody is in favour of). Never criticize an auditor or an org in responding to SO #1 letters. Peace and Understanding is the keynote of responses to people writing SO #l letters. Save the thunder for the true source of entheta in the area such as a bad D of P. but even then only when the evidence of his guilt is in plain view.

      This SO #1 line is a detection line. One never responds to originators in any other way than Peace and Understanding. One uses the condition (theta or entheta) of SO #1 letters from an area to get a view of how well the field, franchise and orgs are practicing Scientology there. There is never bad SO #1 from an area where the field, franchise and org are doing their jobs well. So it is a reassuring point when SO #1 is all theta from an area. But no SO #1 at all from an area is an index that that area is not pushing us. It may even be active, but if no SO #1 arrives then that area is pushing Joe Squirrel at our expense, or worse, running us down to the public….

      If a long distance comm line starts acting up, be very careful how it’s handled. The safest course is don’t reply directly to snarly or critical despatches from org personnel anywhere. Consider the line temporarily wrecked. Do something about it but use another line or approach. It’s too risky in orgs to try to run off somebody’s overts 12,500 miles away with a despatch to that person. Use it as a symptom and explore it carefully. How much of the org does it represent? Call for other filed despatches available to you at once from other persons in that org. Do they contain any misemotion? Trace it all down without sending a single cable or despatch back. Never surrender to an impulse to flash back. Use a misemotional despatch to correct an org condition and be very sure that you really know the exact condition before you try to correct it. When you’re sure, act. The action perhaps will be getting somebody audited, or a transfer, or getting somebody retrained or finding a new Org/Assn Sec or getting an HCO Sec’s hat on. But don’t reply just handle.The SO #1 line (formerly only for LRH addressed mail) is the public and general incoming mail line to LRH, MSH and the Executive Director and is watched and kept in order by the Executive Director. It is a very important line in that no major org breakdown has ever occurred without being preceded by entheta SO #1 mail from that area! One can estimate the condition of service, admin and tech, (dominantly the latter), from the character of SO #1 letters from an area. A year before the Victorian Enquiry SO #1 from the Melbourne area went bad and stayed bad. Thus this SO #1 line, we learn from this and other instances, is an important index of the character of Scientology operation in an area.

      The SO #1 line is used by the Executive Director as an alerting bell, not as a subject to be responding to directly. SO #1 answers are severely regulated by policy-the maxim is “Give them what they want and keep them happy.” Respond casually to entheta, or non-commitally.

      Forward complaints received to the org or auditor involved for their or his or her comment. Forward the response from the org or auditor to the originator, when it comes if it is politic to do so or condense it if it is not, as a second letter, the first written at once is only an ack. Never let Orgs use the SO #1 line as a sales line. Never let a critical letter go to anyone in answer to an SO #1. Just listen and understand. Ask SO #1 writers for clarification if you don’t understand and want to. Keep the line itself all “Good Roads and Good Weather” (which everybody is in favour of). Never criticize an auditor or an org in responding to SO #1 letters. Peace and Understanding is the keynote of responses to people writing SO #l letters. Save the thunder for the true source of entheta in the area such as a bad D of P. but even then only when the evidence of his guilt is in plain view.

      This SO #1 line is a detection line. One never responds to originators in any other way than Peace and Understanding. One uses the condition (theta or entheta) of SO #1 letters from an area to get a view of how well the field, franchise and orgs are practicing Scientology there. There is never bad SO #1 from an area where the field, franchise and org are doing their jobs well. So it is a reassuring point when SO #1 is all theta from an area. But no SO #1 at all from an area is an index that that area is not pushing us. It may even be active, but if no SO #1 arrives then that area is pushing Joe Squirrel at our expense, or worse, running us down to the public….

      If a long distance comm line starts acting up, be very careful how it’s handled. The safest course is don’t reply directly to snarly or critical despatches from org personnel anywhere. Consider the line temporarily wrecked. Do something about it but use another line or approach. It’s too risky in orgs to try to run off somebody’s overts 12,500 miles away with a despatch to that person. Use it as a symptom and explore it carefully. How much of the org does it represent? Call for other filed despatches available to you at once from other persons in that org. Do they contain any misemotion? Trace it all down without sending a single cable or despatch back. Never surrender to an impulse to flash back. Use a misemotional despatch to correct an org condition and be very sure that you really know the exact condition before you try to correct it. When you’re sure, act. The action perhaps will be getting somebody audited, or a transfer, or getting somebody retrained or finding a new Org/Assn Sec or getting an HCO Sec’s hat on. But don’t reply just handle.

  • Racnad

    John McMaster marks the beginning of a distinct period of Scientology – when clears were numbered – supposedly in the order that they were made clear. I recall this confusion the first time I tried to read Dianetics. I was told at a young age that the first clear was John McMaster who achieved the exalted State of Clear in the mid 1960s. But in Dianetics LRH writes about all they clears he’s making! I asked my mom about this and she said “Well, they thought they were clear, but they found out that they weren’t, so Hubbard worked on the Tech some more, they thought people were clear (since Scientology literature throughout the 1950s also talks about people reaching clear), but it was with John McMaster they figured out that they actually reached Clear.” I asked, “But wasn’t Ron actually the first Clear?” Reply: “Well, he wanted to keep his bank for a while to play around with it, but realized it wasn’t doing him any good, so he got rid of his.” “What’s Clear Number is Ron?” “I don’t know.”

    So from the mid 60s into the 1970s, people declared Clear received a number and often wore a silver Clear bracelet inscribed with their clear number. Someone might be Clear #79 or Clear #1721 or Clear #4017. The Official Tally was published in Auditor Magazine “THERE ARE NOW 5,621 CLEARS!”

    Then came a concept called the “Dianetic Clear” or “Natural Clear” – when someone was declared to be clear not after doing all the processing on the grade chart up to Clear – but spontaneously went clear on a lower grade, went clear undetected in a previous life as a Scientologist in the 1950s, or discovered to be one of the rare thetans who was just Clear all along. A friend of mine at Apple School went clear, and others followed, including pre-teens and some people I thought were real jerks (“Cleared Cannibals” I was R-factored when asking about this). The Clear Tally in Auditor Magazine shot from 6000 to 10,000 to more than 20,000 in less than two years. As I asked more about this, I realized that if someone wasn’t responding well to auditing (you can’t address a Reactive Mind if it’s not there), they are asked if they had bypassed going Clear. And what happens? The PC thinks “OMG! Did I just win the spiritual lottery?” They are happy and produce an F/N.

    At this time in my life I still did believe the State of Clear was real, but recognized both the flawed tech (today we call it “confirmation bias”), and the fact that Scientology culture prohibited saying anything about that, lest you “invalidate the state of Clear” – a Suppressive Act. For me, the term Clear became a meaningless label. A couple years later, a huge chunk of the 20,000 Clears had either been declared Suppressive or had left the Church, Clear Tallies and Clear Numbers quietly fell by the wayside.

    • MissCandle

      WOW

    • Vistaril

      But but but . . . what about the Past Life Clear and the Keyed Out Clear? I think David Mayo summed up the whole “Clear” thing when he said . . .

      ” . . . It was PR and marketing considerations that led Hubbard to decide that certain people were “clear” at a certain point, and that they therefore had no reactive mind . . . “

      . . . same with the braclets. How much did they cost?

      • Michael Leonard Tilse

        #15547 here. Mine cost about $150 in 1984.

        • Captain Howdy

          My stupid sister is #11,986

          • q-bird

            how do you know that # Captain?

            • Captain Howdy

              Got it from the scientology service completion listing.

        • TheHoleDoesNotExist

          Boy, the marketing ploy really worked. I think mine was in the 2,000 or 3,000 numbers and that was I think 1980 o 81? It wasn’t a total waste. I sold my clear bracelet and OT bracelet to help with the cash fund I when I left and all I had was 2 suitcases of stuff to my name.

          • Michael Leonard Tilse

            I still have my clear bracelet. I sold some IAS pins and I think the LOC pin on ebay, along with a bunch of books. Before I left I managed to sell my e-meter to another scientologist, at about a $1000 loss. I still have a box of books that I will either sell or burn. A bunch of the earlier books, including a ‘mayo’ tech dictionary.

            All reasonable offers accepted.

            • Tony would make great use of them.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              Yes, yes he would.

            • TheHoleDoesNotExist

              Sell it to the indies or freezone I guess. Some things I wish I had kept now of my in laws because they go back to late 50’s and 60’s and 70’s. Since Miscavige ordered a Fahrenheit 451 party some years ago, historians are interested in early stuff, and indies interested in the “pure” stuff. Although it boggles my mind about the pure since everything got changed every 5 minutes. Wait a sec, a mayo dictionary? New one on me.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              An original ‘tech dictionary’ that had references to stuff Mayo did. It was withdrawn and re-edited to remove any reference to Mayo or any of his “squirrel ideas”.

            • TheHoleDoesNotExist

              That would have been the one I had.

            • Missionary Kid

              Co$ is, like the old Pravda, all about historical revisionism.

            • David Mayo and his suppressive semicolons! COB is still cleaning up after him!

            • Captain Howdy

              I have a tech dictionary from 1975.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              That’s the one! If you look in the front, it lists David Mayo as a contributor.

            • Captain Howdy

              Yep.

            • TheHoleDoesNotExist

              I just looked again at the emeter Hubbard is holding in the picture above. That’s the version I had, complete with the wooden case.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              British Mark IV. Supposedly they were the best prior to the space-age Mark VI.

          • Had to be higher than that, mine was 94xx in 1978

            • TheHoleDoesNotExist

              Weird. Maybe it was retroactive? (it was determined I’d gone clear in 1976). Or maybe my memory is worse than I think. Oh wait….that was father in laws number level (I sold that one later). Well, that’s interesting then, I know for Sure it was only 4 numbers, so that means there were only a few hundred clears during a 4 year period. I guess there is no way they can keep numbering. Those sci veterans have been clear and OT, then back to the bottom again, then clear and ot, 3 times now at least.

              Well, Hubbard Did say that there was no such thing as math. And in scientology, that is so true.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              The clear numbers were very low for a long time. When the tubby one came out with “Where are all the clears?” HCOB and proclaimed that people had actually been going clear on dianetics all along, people started attesting to clear and the numbers jumped from around 6000-7000 to over 30,000 in just a few years. 1978 was when this HCOB came out and the run on ‘clear’ started. It sounds like you were either just on the edge or in the first group. I attested to clear in late 1979 when I came back into the Sea Org and my number, as I said, was #15547.

          • q-bird

            good – you got rid of it – toute suite – sold it – done with it – gone – a shiny bauble – useless – a symbol of a chain that binds you – so unimportant when compared to you & your freedom & peace of mind —- I am so glad you are here & talking about your experiences Holey.

          • stateofcircle

            I’m sure you have told us five million times, but I can’t remember, so I would like to ask how far did you get on the OT levels?
            Of course if you haven’t revealed this and don’t want to, I understand. I am just curious. I mean, if you’re an OT8, I should definitely be careful what I say to you since you have the ability to send death rays through the computer and obliterate me!

            • TheHoleDoesNotExist

              The highest level at the time….OT 5, although, just to keep it confusing, it had been OT 7 right before that. But those were Different OT levels than now. sheesh. I know.
              And when I did it, it Was cause over matter energy space and time, or so I was told. And I was, in session. As soon as I crossed the street and back on post, I shrunk like Alice in Wonderland to low life, total effect of scientology and the loons.

        • Peter

          I think mine was about $25 in the late 60s. I now wonder whatever happened to it.

    • I am

      What? There are no more clear numbers? What do they inscribe on their ugly, clunky clear bracelets?

      • Peter

        They have simply begun from Zero again. I’ve recently seen photos of “New Clears” with numbers if the 50s.

    • RMycroft

      All these different types of Clears, and not one could produce what Ron had listed on the box.

      • BuryTheNuts2

        I had a mad crush on Mr. Clean as a little girl!!!

        • Captain Howdy

          You and Yul Brenner.

          • BuryTheNuts2

            hehehe. Yul was HOT!

            • noseinabk

              My Mom’s favorite movie was The King and I. I didnt get it until I was older. Yes Yul was HOT!

            • Captain Howdy

              Yul Brenner had a crush on Mr Clean because he was a legendary narcissistic a-hole. I had a relative who was a stage manger on Broadway and later on In Frisco, and he told us that crew lived in dread of hearing that “The King and I” was on the schedule. One of the many demands in his rider was that his dressing room was painted…every night.. after he left.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              You are murdering my childhood!!!

            • Captain Howdy

              That’s one of my specialties.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              Damn! I hate it when you win!
              And you always win….

            • Captain Howdy

              The Devil always wins…well, except for that one time with Daniel Webster, but he cheated!

            • Observer

              Our needles all float down here!

    • It would be hard to give a clear number these days. I have mine, but damn if the bracelet wasn’t “disappeared” years ago.

      If I was still in, Dave would tell me I wasn’t clear, re audit me to clear, them would he give me the old number back or assign a new one before he once again told me I wasn’t clear and started the whole thing again. It would be hard to give someone 6 different clear numbers without them catching on eventually. Same with reassigning the same number, they might question that too.

      • loulai

        Thereby proving Jason Beghe’s point: “Show me a mother fucking clear.”

    • stateofcircle

      I never thought about these things. You make some really excellent points and observations here, thank you for sharing.

    • Marie Claire Wolf

      But how the hell did John McMaster end up “in water with a broken collar bone for 3 hours”? Wogs like me want to know.

      • stateofcircle

        He was “overboarded” on the Apollo in the 60’s/70’s as punishment for, most likely, something stupid. Tubby would routinely “overboard” people for even the smallest infractions, sometimes just for his amusement. Some of these were recorded. If the infraction was major, or if he felt particularly evil that day, he would sometimes blindfold people and tie their legs and/or arms together and throw them over.

        • FistOfXenu

          “He was “overboarded” on the Apollo in the 60’s/70’s as punishment for, most likely, something stupid”

          Wast it maybe being smarter than L Ron Tubbard?

    • Missionary Kid

      Like the rest of the con of LRH, declaring someone clear was again a con. It was just a variation on the old shell game. Now you see it, now you don’t. Pay some money, and you’ll see it again.

    • Peter

      Only to be resurrected by the stat happy COB in PT! Now he gets to do it all over again.

      IMHO, the most powerful level was 5 and 5A, Power Processing. The final command of Power Plus, when fully cognited upon (two words), blew away so many people and put them in proper perspective to live life that Power Processing was dropped from the “Bridge”. It was one gift opportunity that LRH presented me for which I’ll always be thankful. I’m quite sure it was a gift not intended.

  • Captain Howdy

    I’m guessing most people around here have seen these already, but here’s some deleted scenes from “The Master”.

    http://youtu.be/CTTb1AC8LRA

    • BuryTheNuts2

      That was great. Especially the ending!

      • Captain Howdy

        Yeah, it was kool.

        • Michael Leonard Tilse

          Smokin’

          • L. Wrong Hubturd

            Minty.

    • Michael Leonard Tilse

      I really liked that movie. It’s fun to think of all that never made it into the theatre still could surface in a major director’s cut issued in a few years when the cults power has diminished to sniggers.

      It could finally tell the story he envisioned, not the redacted version circumstances and the studio could risk.

      More 70mm goodness and wonderful acting.

      • Captain Howdy

        I think PTA freaked about all the prerelease publicity it was getting as a supposed expose of scientology, so he decided to cut a lot of the sci/di references. I think he wanted the film to be known as something more than that “scientology movie”, which I think backfired slightly.

        • BuryTheNuts2

          I think it backfired more than slightly.

          • Captain Howdy

            It’s half a great film IMO. The motorcycle metaphor plot device was extremely heavy handed. I was like “you’re kidding, right?’

            • BuryTheNuts2

              I really liked it when I first saw it. But the more I thought about it, and deconstructed it…I got more disappointed in the overall movie. It did have some exceptional scenes though.

            • Captain Howdy

              It did, but “There Will Be Blood” it’s not.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              I need to redbox that one.

            • Captain Howdy

              You haven’t seen it ?!?!

            • BuryTheNuts2

              Nope. The Master was the only PTA movie I have ever watched.

            • Captain Howdy

              You must, must see it. It’s already considered a classic and Daniel Day Lewis gives his greatest performance…so far.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              He was very good as Obama.

            • TheHoleDoesNotExist

              It was on TV just last week or so. Watched it again. The soundtrack is still as powerful as the movie.

            • Captain Howdy

              The soundtrack is brilliant..and I’m not even a radiohead fan.

            • TheHoleDoesNotExist

              Well, now I have to admit I didn’t see The Master. After reading all the comments, I was like meh. But the same guy did the original soundtrack score for the Master.

            • Captain Howdy

              It’s worth seeing, it’s just that the last act was somewhat of a disappointment for me. I think PTA is the greatest living director, so perhaps my expectations were a bit high.

            • Sherbet

              I never made it to the end of “Blood.” I got bored. It was good, but…boring. Anyway, my favorite PTA movie is Boogie Nights, although I really liked The Master.

            • Captain Howdy

              Report to ethics!…nevermind..report straight to the RPF..which in this case stands for Rehabilitating Perception of Film

            • Sherbet

              Sorry, Captain. Don’t I get props for saying I like Boogie Nights?

            • Captain Howdy

              OK. I still haven’t seen Magnolia or Punch Drunk Love, even though I intend to. There’s just 2 things that have been preventing me.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              Tom Cruise and Adam Sandler?

            • Captain Howdy

              Give that lady a cigar!

            • Spackle Motion

              “There Will be Blood” was not that great. There were awkward scenes of overacting and weird pontification for no reason. The radio advertisements about drinking milkshakes did not help, either.

            • Captain Howdy
            • Lurkness

              What TR is that from?

            • BuryTheNuts2

              I am still laughing like a MF!!!
              can’t stop. Too funny.

            • Captain Howdy

              TR-9

            • MissCandle

              I saw the movie with my 88 year old father. I liked it. He was sorry he wasted his time.

            • I was reading a book about Hubbard and he supposedly really did that. I had never heard that before. It’s in the Dart Smohen ebook I believe. http://www.paulsrabbit.com/DartSmohenRealStory_20081216.pdf‎

        • Michael Leonard Tilse

          Those deleted scenes were wonderful. Just the scene where the Master’s son tells Freddy about the ‘split saber’ and says ‘he hid it’ would have made the digging in the desert scene much more connected with the rest of the story.

          It is also clear that Freddy’s character was partly an allusion to the beginnings of the Sea Org with the jacket scene.

          It was a great movie, but with all the texture and backstory that was cut, it could have been much greater.

    • DodoTheLaser

      Thanks. Good addition to what I’ve seen in the theater.

      Also: “I like Kools, minty flavor”. 🙂

  • ze moo

    Jason Beghe said it well, ‘show me a mofo clear’. Imaginary classes of people who can do imaginary things. Sounds like a meeting of the So Cal writers club at a local bar. Or Mets fans, Mets fans believe almost anything.

    Is it coincidence that METS contains all the letters of MEST??? I think not.

    Thank you Jon, someone has to preserve the early history of the Clamatology, this way no one keeps us up with stories of the ‘great early days’.

  • Michael Leonard Tilse

    Nice clip from the lecture. I had a friend in the Sea Org, Daryl Naugle, who claimed he levitated an ashtray the first time he read the TR-8 instructions.

    He said he was in the courseroom and read the bulletin and said “Oh, COOL! and looked at the ash tray and said ‘stand up’ and it rose up off the table just like that. He said he was never able to do it again.

    But then, Daryl was a bit of a prevaricator.

    • MissCandle

      ” He said he was never able to do it again.”

      He meant, he was never able to it again with a witness.

    • DodoTheLaser

      Prevaricator. Heh. Perhaps, scientology’s real name is prevaricatorology. Or just a lying scam.

  • Michael Leonard Tilse

    There is one lecture, (oh, Bunkerites, help me with which one…), where Hubbard talks about some early member back in the 50’s who would levitate their body and float up and down the halls. He had to tell them to stop of course, as it disturbed the other members who were not so advanced.

    • Missionary Kid

      Of course, he is the only one who would attest to it.

  • stateofcircle

    Sorry, Off Topic here, but I don’t remember this coming up in the comments in the last two day and I am really confused/curious….
    I always knew there were a few rumors of Jennifer Lopez being linked to Scientology, but a few of the Leah articles mention that JLo has strong ties to the church and is super involved, which would obviously have a huge impact on her friendship with Leah. I know Lea has said in the past when faced with questions of whether JLo was involved, Leah had remarked that “Can’t two girls just be friends for friendship’s sake” (something like that), implying the JLo was not a member. SO, am I a total idiot for not knowing that JLo is majorly involved? Is she involved? Again, I know there have been a few rumors and her hanging out with a few Scilons like Leah, but that doesn’t prove to me that she’s a clam. Anyone?

    • BuryTheNuts2

      I thought she was into voodoo or something (seriously).
      Her Dad is a 20 year clam.

      • stateofcircle

        Really??? How come I never knew this?!?!?!

        • 1subgenius

          Its Sooper-Seekrit.
          Don’t tell anyone, and don’t bring it up if you interview her.
          But, other than that, Scientologists are proud of their “religion”.

    • noseinabk

      JLo’s Dad is a scientologist. Wonder if she will or has already disconnected from Leah. It appears Kirstie has.

      http://scientologycelebrity.wordpress.com/

      Twitter pic at the end of the article.

      • BuryTheNuts2

        Lucky Leah. That is one way to get rid of body thetans!

      • Captain Howdy

        I don’t think JLo is a clam, but dad my pressure her to end the friendship otherwise JLo could be a PTS to him.

    • Captain Howdy

      Her dad’s a clam, her best friend is/was a lifelong clam, but she’s a periwinkle? How’s that work?

    • BuryTheNuts2
  • 0tessa

    This voice: he knows he is lying but is enjoying his audience believing it.
    Horrifying.

    • RMycroft

      I can’t listen to Hubbard doing his smarmy voice without a rising urge of Fist of Death.

    • Poison Ivy

      Yep. I think he’s one of many sociopath who believes his own lies while he’s telling them. That’s what makes him so successful at the Big Con.

      • RMycroft

        Look at that time at a writers get-together when Hubbard was spouting off about his exploits, and at the end, someone pointed out that Hubbard would have to be in his 80s to have done all that. Hubbard totally lost it. That’s not the reaction of a normal person, even someone spinning a yarn.

  • disqus_SPiN5N4Adl

    Ha ha … “… I said ‘the ashtray'” … Carnival barker.

    I just finished reading Paulette Cooper’s old book… Great read.

  • Watergate

    I want to make a comment about the oft-used description of John McMaster in his later years as being “destitute.” (Disclosure: I never knew John McMaster, and this isn’t really about him.)

    Most old people ARE destitute. Without family care, without retirement savings, without personal or family wealth, most people in their later years live alone on little more than a government subsidy. When you live alone and have little human interaction and no intimacy with another person, when your closest friends have died or live far away, when you no longer have any work that engages you intellectually or emotionally, one does tend to become depressed. When people are in pain, they self-medicate with whatever is handy. And yes, alcohol use certainly exacerbates depression.

    The truth of the expression “growing old isn’t for sissies” will eventually become self-evident to those who don’t die young. Growing old and becoming destitute is not a character flaw. It is a realistic expectation of growing old in Western society.

    Thanks for listening.

    • Captain Howdy

      That’s a bingo over here!

      You nailed it. Thanks.

    • That has to be the saddest comment made in a long time and I must respond not in our family.

      As I walked into my living room with my iPad reading this comment, my husband was complaining because his 80 year old parents phone had been busy all morning.

      If I take more than 3 hours to respond to a text, I will have my daughter in law on my doorstep. I talk to my daughters every day, my son several times a week.

      My 10 year old grandson took it upon himself to check up on his great grandparents in a regular basis and was at my side to move my camp chair every time we went to a new spot when we were at the cabin.

      Even if I die penniless I will not die unloved.

      • BuryTheNuts2

        You are very lucky.

        • Yes. Yes. I am.

          • Peter

            I’ll bet you pulled *that* in, too! In which case, Very Well Done!!! 🙂

      • MissCandle

        I agree with you, Valerie.
        In contrast, Shortie apparently has billions — but no love.

        • We need Obs to do a Scrooge McDuck Shoop for us. He fits the bill.a

      • richelieu jr

        How wonderful!
        There is something in American society, and unfortunatley, more and more in European society, where elderly people are not treated with any sort of dignity, not just as Human beings, but a people who have lived and learned and loved and may information and wisdom to share. Here in France at least we take care of them, but we are no where near the Japanese, for example, who make them the honoured heads of the family (as well as stars of a frightening popular genre f porn film over there…

        They are treated like burdens and idiot children and any hep to any weak person is ‘socialism’ (gasp!)

        I am so glad your family is close and gives age the respect it deserves. Bless you!

    • 1subgenius

      I hear you.

    • Spackle Motion

      Excellent comment, Watergate. What exacerbates depression for older ex-Scientologists is the phobias around getting proper mental health care and not having paid into Social Security and/or having the cult steal all of your retirement funds, often dropping these poor elderly people without money, community, and with no care. It is the saddest thing to see these people give up their retirement and inheritance only to be dropped with nothing when they no longer have anything to give.

      • Pinkhammer

        And what would happen to foreign nationals {working} in LA or at Flag who are then dumped? They can’t stay here on government subsidies and a couple hundred dollars probably won’t get them home…

    • Lady Squash

      Dear Watergate,
      “Becoming destitute late in life is not a character flaw.” I couldn’t agree with you more. That said, the irony of John McMasters ending up that way is that he was Clear. And life is simply not supposed to be that way for Clears. He was more than a Clear. He was a Super Star Clear. And I am sure he believed his life would be endlessly beautiful. That’s the dream.

  • The plot of Leah Remini vs. Scientology has gone from distilled water to thick mud in terms of viscosity, it seems:

    Page Six reports that Remini didn’t let the matter drop – she actually
    threatened to call the police and tell them that Shelly, who hasn’t been
    seen in public since 2006, was missing.

    “Because Leah threatened to call the police to find Shelly, she was
    put through ‘Security Checking,’ her family was put through it, and her
    friends,” a source said.

    “I wish to share my sincere and heartfelt appreciation for the
    overwhelming positive response I have received from the media, my
    colleagues, and fans from around the world. I am truly grateful and
    thankful for all your support,” Remini said in a statement last night.

    Remini is reportedly considering going public about
    what she’s been through, but wants to wait and see what the Church is
    going to do, since they’re rumored to harass those who try to leave.
    Leah can stay at my place if she needs to hide out. I am a strong
    supporter of religious freedom for sitcom stars.

    Also, Google “Where is Shelly Miscavige?” and prepare to be astonished by the results.

    • RMycroft

      Has anyone registered WhereIsShellyMiscavige.com yet?

      • I actually went over to register it as a public service to the Bunker and was going to offer free hosting to anyone who wanted to put up a site. Damn damn. Already gone.

        • RMycroft

          Interesting fact: It was created two days before the WhoIs domains for Tommy Davis and Jessica Feshbach.

          Did some flap occur in March 2011?

          • Michael Leonard Tilse

            This is like signals intelligence…. It indicates that possibly Tommy and Jessica’s smooth departure might have something to do with what they know about Shelly.

            • Where is Shelly Miscavige, downy?

            • Mark

              Yes, what Chutney said.

      • Jon Hendry

        How about “WhatHappenedToShellyMiscavige.com”?

    • Michael Leonard Tilse

      That is Awesome! So many results to choose from.

  • aquaclara

    Jon, this is a perfect wrap-up to an excellent week here in the Bunker. Your stories are truly enjoyable. I see some definite parallels between LRH and COB. Who at this point is left in Davey’s management team? He may in fact be the only true SP today.

    It is touching to see how many exes you have had an opportunity to meet with. I hope this has helped your healing process as well as theirs. There are many stories in this still to tell, so please don’t get too tired of this yet!
    Thank you very much!

  • Captain Howdy

    Here’s Leah Remini’s service completion list if you haven’t seen it already.

    I wonder if she’ll spill the beans about Xenu?

    http://www.truthaboutscientology.com/stats/by-name/l/leah-remini.html

    • 1subgenius

      They soaked her good.
      And that brain will take a whole lot of unwashing.
      Its deep.

    • TheHoleDoesNotExist

      At least she didn’t do the L’s. Those have totally messed up one too many minds. I have to say if it is true it took her Five 5 years of interrogations and sec checks and ethics torture for asking a question, it’s probably going to take her several years of decompression and lots of reading (and not from the Indie approved reading list!) to peel back Her scientology onion.

      • 1subgenius

        I don’t think the lists are always complete.

        • Captain Howdy

          I don’t think they are either. My sister has been in 30+ years and they have her as completing one course and attesting to clear.

        • Lurkness

          Not up to date and only based on what $cientolgy published in their mags and other mailings.

    • SandiCorrena

      I’d love love love for her to sit down and correct the record with John Sweeney!!

      • BuryTheNuts2

        I was thinking the same thing!!! PLEASE give Sweeney the first interview.
        (Sorry Tony, but he earned it)

  • Sidney18511

    Check out the tweet that Kirstie Alley did which obviously is about Leah. F-N discusting.

    http://scientologycelebrity.wordpress.com/

    • Yeah we talked about it a lot yesterday. We have links and screen caps in comments yesterday. It’s hard to keep up these days. Leave for an hour and there’s no catching up.

  • Michael Leonard Tilse

    I’m ticked, over on http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/leah-remini-leaves-scientology-questioning-583860 they removed my comment in reply to “Spike”!

    This is what I wrote to Spike, who seemed to be a pro-scientology member of the {church}:

    Hi Spike,
    There are things about scientology that are experienced as positive and helpful.
    But there are so many things that have to be ignored, that have to never be looked at, in order for you to continue.

    Have you allowed yourself, ever, to really research the story behind Lisa McPherson’s death or even the official documents about L. Ron Hubbard’s death?

    There are things to know, that scientology won’t allow you to find out. That in itself is an outpoint. How could you, a scientologist with wins and gains be adversely affected by a news story? Or a book written by a Pulitzer Prize winning author?

    I’ve been where you are. I have steadfastly looked away from the news to avoid entheta. I censored myself, censored the information I could have been getting, enough to make a balanced judgement.

    So, I know how confusing it can be to feel that you have gains, yet have to ignore the outpoint of constraints on your reading the news or communication with friends who have left scientology.

    There is more to know than you allow yourself. You need to follow the outpoints I know you see, the injustices I know you know about and find out for yourself the general sherman tank that lies at the why of the matter.

    Good luck Spike. Remember, look, not listen.

    Michael

    • That’s a new one from Spike. BTN’s comments are gone, mine are gone. All 20 of the first comments have been “disappeared”.

      • richelieu jr

        Someone must be flagging them all- I wonder who?

        Follow up on them, a nd don’t let them get away with it. A letter or several to THR’s editors may be in order.

    • Are_sics

      That’s a beautiful comment. Thanks for re-posting it here.

      • Michael Leonard Tilse

        Thank you!

    • noseinabk

      I copied and re-posted it . Will see if it sticks.

      • L. Wrong Hubturd

        Good idea! Thx.

      • Michael Leonard Tilse

        Thank you!

    • richelieu jr

      That’s great, Michael. Do follow up with the HR, though– Some Scilon may have flagged it and it needs to be reviewed. Your defense will go to show you aren’t hit-and-run Scilon attacker, or a looney hater…

      THR has been doing some really good work on the subject, but even they need to be educated; You might want to suggest they look up the same subjects themselves.

      Really kind letter.

    • Espiando

      Those assclowns over there deleted my post explaining what Dead Agenting was (probably because I mentioned that the Leah Remini “who is” domain was taken). But they did leave my post up where I called DM a “trumped-up dwarf”. Moderators prove that there are jobs out there for the functionally retarded.

  • Michael Leonard Tilse

    I can’t find it now, but someone posted a link to Marty’s blog,

    http://markrathbun.wordpress.com/2013/07/03/dangerous-thoughts/#comment-271527

    Which is very interesting because George White and some others are posting there that they did “OT VIII” in 1988 and the {church} disputed OTVIII HCOB about Hubbard assuming the role of Lucifer the Light bringer and that Jesus was a pedophile, was indeed what they studied on the OT VIII course. That first version of OT VIII in 1988 on the freewinds was soon removed and another version was substituted for everyone else after. The original ones, IIRC, were required to do the new one.

    • Captain Howdy

      I wish Tony would do an article about the confusion about the upper levels. I read that the OTVIII “Jesus was a pedo” version was a fake created by Fishman, that he put up on the net.

      • Michael Leonard Tilse

        Evidently those who did the very first released OTVIII level on the freewinds, had that in their course materials. Some were troubled by it, others took it in stride, but those posting say they remember studying it and wordclearing it on that level.

        Evidently it was removed and OTVIII changed to something else.

        • TheHoleDoesNotExist

          What does it matter? Hubbard contradicted himself three ways to Sunday, constantly. By the end, there was not a single category of person, profession, group, race, you name it, they was not a moral enemy of scientology (ie, Ron). I do remember in the mid 80’s a huge uproar about changes on the OT 8 course at ASHO Day, but the regges were doing cart wheels and walking on their hands. There was even a training “package” scrambled together to include it. Basically just the confidential OT stuff had been removed so Requirements of who could be on course were greatly relaxed.

          It was tough getting customers, public to do training. So ASHO had all these Class 6’s sitting around, either in the field or at missions and orgs, and this meant more paying customers. As far as Hubbard claiming being the antichrist, and terrifying members about an imminent invasion where people would spontaneous combust, is this Any crazier than any of his other mental ravings or drug induced hallucinations or screaming hangovers he recorded? pfffft.

          If you don’t like something Hubbard Or Miscavige did/does, just wait 5 minutes. It and the weather are guaranteed to change.

          • Michael Leonard Tilse

            I remember telling Heather, the LRH Host at AOLA something like this: I don’t like the ‘Ron’ magazines. They are obviously public relations, designed to burnish his image. I want the real story of Ron’s life, the good the bad, everything, warts and all.

            Yes it is more ravings of a disturbed and vain man. It is not any crazier than History of Man or Pain and Sex. The value of sorting this out is taking apart those things Hubbard created like OTVIII, that so many of us had hoped for, had dreamed of, had hung onto through all the financial rape and spiritual abuse and showing them for the craziness that they are.

            • Lurkness

              ^^^ This too.

            • TheHoleDoesNotExist

              OT 3 or philadelphia doctorate course tapes….if that’s not enough to send one running, I don’t know. Look at all those who have done OT 7 and 8, some of them for the 2nd or 3rd time, and they are Still hanging around, still bankrupting themselves, now supposedly for Super Power. Well, if they did Super Power tomorrow, next year afer they get over That huge shock and let down, they’ll be finding ways to shark more cash for the invisible Next Level.

              What’s my point. Now I’m not sure. Oh yeah…I think if you’ve gotten to OT 3 and still hangin’, it takes some kind of External force, a whack of hard reality from the real world, to happen to snap them out of it, like getting ill, or losing family, business, life savings, friends, and sitting in line at bankuptcy court, those kinds of whacks, that help’s wake them up.

            • Robert Eckert

              There’s a saying in AA, “If you want to get a mule’s attention, first you have to hit him on the head with a two by four. Some of us need bigger 2×4’s than others.”

          • Spackle Motion

            It matters to those that still put stock into Hubbard as ‘Source’ because they compartmentalize the bad Hubbard and only focus on the good Hubbard (to which there was little, imo). So it is a big debate to the Kool Aid drinkers that haven’t yet let go.

          • Lurkness

            Personally, I think it is important because of the all the BS the {church} puts out about how $cientology is compatible with other faiths and they respect them too. This goes far beyond Christianity being an “implant”.

            Where Hubbard intended to lead those hooked in the cult is important as fair warning to others even considering his {technology} and his {church}.

            • TheHoleDoesNotExist

              He denigrated every relgion and every reglion’s icons and every philosophy one by one. The Advance Mags were pretty much dedicated to it and the notion only Hubbard and His philosophy and great discovered could save you and only if you did it Exactly like he laid out, and of course pay for every step, and then next month or year when he changed it again, you had to relearn and repay because it was the Only salvation.

              I don’t know what religion isn’t already aware of Hubbard’s spitting on their altars and kicking sand in their gods’ eyes. But yes, it would be another poke in their side to learn about the OT 8 wack.

      • TonyOrtega

        It’s on the list. Other things hotter priority right now than trying to validate a 1988 document. But we’ll get to it.

        • Mark

          Hubble-bubble, toil and trouble! I thought it was suspiciously quiet here today…

          • Robert Eckert

            Tony promised us a Big story, then said it was on hold, which I take to mean that it is getting Bigger faster than Tony can write it up, or that some sources need protecting until the whole thing is put together.

        • Captain Howdy

          Thanks.

        • stateofcircle

          I hope you’re getting tons of TV and print interview requests for commentary on this whole debacle!

  • BuryTheNuts2

    Yipee! Downy is back. They must have been locked in a closet and gotten disoriented…
    They don’t know it is not Thursday.

    • noseinabk
      • BuryTheNuts2

        I am pretty sure I did.
        You all are welcome!

        • Captain Howdy

          So St Claire or some other scilon saw your profile and followed you back here. L Wrong said that St. Claire has been here before?

          • BuryTheNuts2

            St. Claire already seems to know who we are.
            So I am sure he already knows how to get here.

            • Captain Howdy

              I found this giveaway in a comment by St Claire on another article.

              “You’re free to get worked up about them if that makes you feel on purpose”

              On purpose? BUSTED!

            • BuryTheNuts2

              I know, I saw that one too. Oopsie!

            • pronoia

              OMG! Serious iInternet ninja!

          • Robert Eckert

            I went back and looked at all S_StClaire’s Disqus posts, and his first post actually started with the classic “I’m not a Scientologist but…”

  • Lurkness

    Kool, downvote tech is back! Enjoy the entheta, maybe something will stick.

    • Where is Shelly Miscavige, downy, do you know?

    • Lurkness

      Opps, BTN already noted. It popped up on the refresh.

  • Mark

    Ooh goody, another invisible troll! C’mon, you little bugger – show yourself!

    • SandiCorrena

      He went Down Down Down and the flames went higher and it BURNS BURNS BURNS…..

      • Mark

        I shall refrain from the more obvious references to rings of fire, haemorrhoids, people talking out of their bottoms, Preparation Ouch, &c., but it did feel like a small and incontinent creature had got in here, didn’t it?

    • BuryTheNuts2

      They are just not as much fun when they don’t engage!

      • Captain Howdy

        All the down votes have disappeared.

        • pronoia

          A convert!!!!

          • Captain Howdy

            Only nuts have the power to soothe the savage squirrel.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              I drug them when they aren’t looking!
              Works every time.

            • ze moo

              Tom Lehrer addressed that problem.

              https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yhuMLpdnOjY

            • Captain Howdy

              Ha,Ha…I use to have a pet pigeon named Walter 🙁

            • ze moo

              Some call pigeons ‘ghetto squab’. I am not one of those people. Unless a good buffalo chicken wing sauce is used.

            • Mark

              Wouldn’t ‘The Masochism Tango’ be more relevant to anyone still trapped in the Co$?

              I know he said he gave up song-writing because the world had got beyond satire, but I think Tom should and could come out of retirement and write a whole song-cycle about $cientology.

            • ze moo

              The ‘Masochism Tango’ is perfectly appropriate to CO$. Adam Sandler and Jimmy Fallon have built their stick on Toms work.

            • Mark

              “Shtik”, nisht “stick”, bubbeleh!

            • ze moo

              My yiddish is not that good. bubala…..

          • Lurkness

            One can only hope. Perhaps s/he is on step two of the tech training?
            downvote
            nix downvote

        • BuryTheNuts2

          I think he likes me.
          I think it was because I insulted the scion ties!

          • Captain Howdy

            Yeah, that must be it.

        • Observer

          Dang, I had a clam troll shoop ready to go. 🙁

          • MissCandle

            O, please save it for next time. There will be a next time.

            • Observer

              I save them all. You never know when they’ll come in handy again!

            • MissCandle

              One day, when this is all over, I will host your cos art exhibition.

  • Lurkness

    Business Insider has more today on “Where’s Shelly?”:

    Tour The Compound Where The Missing Wife Of Scientology’s Leader Might Be Living.

    http://www.businessinsider.com/is-the-missing-wife-of-scientologys-leader-hidden-in-this-spike-fenced-compound-2012-7?op=1#ixzz2YxuYjDe9

    • Mark

      “AGP found a damaged portion of the fence. It’s not clear whether it was bent by falling trees or something from inside the compound crashing against it.” ooohooo-ooOOoo…all very ‘X-Files’; I hope the damage was caused by an irate Mrs. Miscavige driving at the fence in a car, in an effort to get at her recalcitrant spouse.

      Seriously, it’s heartening that this sort of thing is now on a major news website, rather than buried away in one of the numerous blogs that Bunkerites are very familiar with, but hardly anyone else knows about.

      • stateofcircle

        I’m not so diluted to think that he would listen to my comment, but on Mike Rinder’s story about Leah I posted asking him for his insider perspective on how he, as the former head of OSA and PR for the cherch, would have handled this situation had he been there for this. I also suggested that he maybe do a seperate post on it. With all of the attention this story is getting, and all of these news outlets undoubtedly clammoring for new information, I think it would be so so interesting for him to write a detailed account of exactly how Scientology is handling this on the inside and what His Midgetsy is thinking and how he’s acting. I think a story like that would definitely gain some traction from other outlets looking for new information on this, and as such would continue in informing the general public about the cult’s insidious practices and behavior. Tony, I know I’m just a lowly follower and maybe this is a silly idea and I’m sure you have a million other things on deck, but I really think this would be a great story and the timing is perfect. Maybe Mike would do it on his own if he even considers it, but, especially with your reach, this would be really, really interesting.

        Or I’m just selfishly interested…who knows. Anyone agree? Especially because it would have the potential to get more damaging information out there to the uninformed wogs? (Speaking of, I think we need a nickname for the rest of the general public that aren’t fervent Sciloon watchers…Scientology has wogs, we should have something. But it wouldn’t be offensive, of course 🙂 )

        • Karen715

          Of course you’re not diluted. Your post seems full-strength to me.

        • Captain Howdy

          Yes Tony should ask Rinder if COB had instructed him to disappear Shelly to Twin Peaks, would he have obeyed..j/k.

          • pronoia

            I dunno. From what I understand, at that place and time, Mike was considered such a degraded being by COB/DM that he would not have been entrusted with anything. Laurese Stuckenbock (sp) is another matter.

            • Captain Howdy

              I meant theoretically.

            • Espiando

              As in “Theoretically, DM has a wee-wee, and he puts it into and takes it out of Laurisse’s hoo-ha on a regular basis”?

        • Espiando

          Virgins, maybe? The celebutard stories, which are pretty much all the general public get outside of the occasional Truth Rundown, Anderson Cooper, and book tours, are the equivalent of getting to second base and maybe a tit squeeze if she’s had a few too many, but there’s no cherry popping that eventually leads to the Fifty Shades of Grey that we do over here.

          Mundanes? That’s the term SF fans use for the “washed” who aren’t. It kinda fits. What we read about is definitely a mindfuck of the first order that tends to skew our weltanschauung.

          Muggles? Don’t fuck with one Joanne Rowling.

          And I’ve never found you diluted, State. Your posts are always full-strength to me.

          • stateofcircle

            Edited from ‘diluted’ to ‘deluded’.
            fckin auto cowreck

        • Mark

          I agree – this is a case of carpe diem, if today’s new is not to become tomorrow’s bin-liner.

          As to nicknames for the general public, I should say you’ve answered your own question: general public.

          But why descend to Hubbard’s level? He stole the slang-term (wince) “wog” while he was here in the UK in the fifties (it’s short for “golliwog”, a curious Victorian stuffed toy that was meant to be a blackface minstrel with a cutaway jacket and striped trousers, which has now thankfully disappeared).

          If “wog” was vulgar back then, nowadays in Britain at least it’s every bit as insulting and unacceptable as the “N” word is in the US.

        • stateofcircle

          I’ve heard so many different versions of the origins story for ‘wog’. I had never heard the word before I started reading about Scientology. Is it still in the vernacular at all in Britain? I know you say it is equivalent to the N word in the US, but I didn’t know it was even that prominent of a word nowadays. I never heard it when I would go to England and none of my British friends ever said it.

          • Robert Eckert

            Your British friends are probably not the kind of people who use that word.

          • Mark

            That must be because all your British friends are nice, non-racist people, and you were only mixing in decent society. No, as I said, along with the toy (last called a “golly” as a mascot for Robinson’s jam in the UK) it’s a piece of history now in Britain, save perhaps among BNP and ‘English Defence League’ neo-Nazi morons.

          • Captain Howdy
            • Mark

              And, boy, did they get into trouble for that! Must be more than thirty years ago now.

            • Captain Howdy

              The music press hated them and the punks hated them also.

            • Mark

              Not entirely; the NME had a nude centrefold of their guitarist. And they got into even more trouble for mentioning certain parts of the female anatomy.

            • Captain Howdy

              The younger punks thought they were old hippie bandwagon jumpers, and the the younger journalists like Parsons, Burchill, Goldman branded them as being misogynistic fascists.

            • Mark

              And just look at what Parsons and Burchill turned into. At least Hugh Cornwell is still going strong!

            • Captain Howdy

              I’m still looking for the book he wrote when he was in prison for heroin possession.

            • Espiando

              How the hell can they be fascists and have a song called “No More Heroes” that starts with the line “Whatever happened to Leon Trotsky”? And Mark’s right about the journos. Burchill in particular turned into a nasty bitch.

            • Captain Howdy

              I agree with you E, but I use to get NME, Sounds a week late in S.F as well as Sniffin Glue, ZigZag when they came out and the leftist side of punk in the U.K hated the Stranglers. The Clash and the Pistols repeatedly bad mouthed them in interviews.

              Burchill and Parsons were complete hypocritical wankers.

            • Mark

              They still are!

            • Captain Howdy

              Did you know that the Stranglers song “London Lady” was about Caroline Coon?

            • Mark

              No. Oh dear:

              “Making love to
              The Mersey Tunnel
              With a sausage –
              Have you ever been to Liverpool?”

              has stuck in my brain ever since. Oh well, we were all young once…

    • Michael Leonard Tilse

      In the photos, they show “satellite” dishes. The big drum like dishes are microwave relay links, either for voice or data. They would have provided a high speed communication link to commercial towers which would relay them to Hollywood and to Int Base. Probably installed back in the 90’s to provide a supposed “secure” data connection when hardwired lines were not available.

      They might even have them directly pointed at Int or Hollywood, but I doubt they have clear line of sight.

      If you look at the big blue complex or the hollywood management building you might still find antennas of this type.

      They might use fiber nowdays, as microwaves like that are easily intercepted.

      • RMycroft

        The microwave links were supposed to be encrypted, but the tech used to do it is probably ancient by now.

        I’ve got a little list:
        http://goo.gl/maps/J31Ky

        • Mark

          That’s the real 007 touch! Got any decrypts yet?

          • RMycroft

            I live in that Upper New York state region, so no.

            • Mark

              Curse those pesky microwaves for travelling in straight lines.

      • grundoon

        INCOMM hq at Big Blue has microwave links to/from CST Twin Peaks (relayed in 4 hops, via Flint Peak in Glendale, Mt. Baldy north of Pomona, and Paradise Mt southwest of Riverside) and to/from Int Base near Hemet (3 hops, via Flint Peak and Mt. Baldy). No other facilities have microwave links. They’re expensive, and most likely needed primarily for keeping the secret computer files continuously backed up at Twin Peaks, and for instant alert of the next FBI raid.

        All the CST facilities, and larger Sea Org bases such as Int and PAC, have local mobile radio communications (base station and some number of vehicles and walkie talkies) that reach maybe a few miles radius around the base.

    • Lurkness

      LOL downvote tech is now back–again–today. Definitely doing the TR:

      downvote

      nix downvote

      Hard to keep track where the entheta might be sticking.

  • Captain Howdy

    I’m watching “Malcolm X”, and when I see the level of harassment that NOI subjected Malcolm and his family to before finally killing him made me think of what being the target of the OSA must be like.

    • pronoia

      Interesting analogy, considering the partnership between Co$ and the NOI.

      • Observer

        Cults of a feather …

        • stateofcircle

          …are mocked together

          • MissCandle

            And they are both scary. Will/Jaden: Word problem: If cos and noi merge or continue to work together, then 1 + 1 = ?

            • MissCandle

              Thank you for my very first down vote. I feel like I truly belong here now. I am very happy.

            • Mark

              The troll’s back.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              Well hopefully they can be a bit more committed this time! Sheesh.

            • noseinabk

              Congratulations! Well done.

          • Observer

            Nice one!

          • pronoia

            teehee

    • Spackle Motion

      You should read his autobiography. The story he tells about getting away from the NOI clearly resemble those that get away from Scientology. The NOI is clearly a cult, and Malcolm X, a very intelligent and incredible human being, also got caught up in a trap. He was as zealous as zealous gets.

      But near the end of his life, he recognized how much he harmed people by his zealotry and warned against following the words of just one man. His noble path out of a cult makes many Indies look like the clowns that they are.

      • Captain Howdy

        I read the Alex Haley biography, but that was long ago.

    • SP ‘Onage

      Malcolm X, would have never become a Uncle Ron. Farrakhan has committed haraam by endorsing scientology, that’s what I was told.

      What’s not being told is, Farrakhan is losing members because of scientology. Like scientology, fear keeps Nation of Islam people from admitting or talking about it.

  • BosonStark

    Cult attorneys say Shelly is not missing, she has been working non-stop for the cult. Maybe they should let her stop? For Xenu’s sake, she’s the wife of the f’n ecclesiastical leader. They can’t give her a day off to say “hi”?

    • Espiando

      Because Shelly is just like Mother Teresa, devoted to her cause of…well, whatever she’s doing at Twit Peaks like Mother Teresa was devoted to her mission in the slums of Kolkata. Only different, because she totally lacks the moral authority and voice of Mother Teresa and never leaves her…okay, new analogy. She’s just like Mary Magdalene, devoted to those spreading the word of the One True Messiah. And she’s married to He Who Came After, just like Mary Magdalene in that Dan Brown book. And she’s a whore, just like…

      Oh, forget it. I’ll leave it to OTVIII.

      • Phil McKraken

        I wouldn’t credit Mother Teresa with an ounce of moral authority. She subsisted on the suffering of others.

        • Espiando

          As did Shelly when she was allowed to be within a hundred miles of the Toxic Dwarf. So the analogy still fits.

        • sugarplumfairy

          Jeez.. tough crowd..

        • Robert Eckert

          OK, so maybe we should compare Shelly to Gandhi instead… Indira Gandhi, that is

  • nottrue

    why didnt tommy tell leah that instead of that you dont rank crap

    • nottrue

      i went down down down and the flames burnt higher

  • Lurkness

    Another operative theory on “Where’s Shelly?” from the folks at Celebrity Center International. They suspect Mary Sue’s old prison, um-err, I mean her old house.

    Is Shelly Miscavige being held at 2345 Chislehurst Drive in Los Feliz?

    http://scientologycelebrity.wordpress.com/2013/05/14/is-shelly-miscavige-being-held-at-2345-chislehurst-drive-in-los-feliz/

    • pronoia

      Please let the tabloid paps stake that place out!

    • BuryTheNuts2

      Pertinent part:

      If anybody in the real world has the time & the balls to do so, might be worth a shot to keep an eye on 2345 Chislehurst & see if they can catch a glimpse of Shelly & get some evidence on that. Last we heard there are at least 6-8 people, all Sea Org & at least one ASI terminal, active in there. None of us can figure out WTF is going on in there & we can’t ask too many questions even tho staff have been buzzing about it since the weekend.

      • TonyOrtega

        Yes, please set up a 24-hour surveillance. You just might catch sight of Mary Sue’s dog.

        • Captain Howdy

          ROLF!

        • BuryTheNuts2

          Will I have to salute it?

    • TonyOrtega

      Bullshit. That house is owned by the children of Hubbard, not the church.

      • BuryTheNuts2

        I love it when you swear!!!

        • TonyOrtega

          It’s an example of the unsubstantiated crap that blog is throwing against the wall that so many people seem to be thrilled with, and that makes my job harder having to correct the record.

          • Lurkness

            Good to know and sorry about that!

          • BuryTheNuts2

            So do you absolutely think they are full of shit? Seriously?

            Because I am certainly not trying to make your job harder.
            As Amanda Palmer once wrote: That would be stupid!

            But if they are total crap…they sure aren’t sucking at it.

            They have definitely seemed to pull a couple of rabbits out of their ass!

            • Captain Howdy

              I think it’s either the work of some creative gossip columnist or some Anons.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              You know, now that I think about it….
              Some Anon’s going for “ultimate enturbulation” by making the Scion’s ‘think’ they have been infiltrated is pretty rich.

            • Espiando

              Pretty easy equation. Scilons are lulzcows. Celebutards are lulzcows. Why not milk both at once?

            • stateofcircle

              I posted this yesterday right before the 2nd post went up, but here’s my theory:
              I have come to the conclusion (i think…) that the person(s) behind that blog – who reads the bunker and it’s comments – is a recently-out staffer who still has connections on the inside. It seems like the information within it is accurate and specific enough to indicate it’s validity, while being general enough to escape major scrutiny. Some of the exes who have worked or have knowledge of CCI have confirmed information they know to be true. But I still find it nearly impossible to believe someone in the Sea Org – even at the more relaxed CCI – can find the time to do this and escape detection for this long. My bet is on a young (20-28) 2nd or 3rd gen ex-staff or SOer with wealthy parents who has grown up in Scientology but still had wog friends and possibly attended a wog school due to their language and views. They grew up thinking Scientology was stupid, but had to maintain the status quo to please their parents/family/friends and continue enjoying their comfortable lifestyle. In typical rich kid fashion, they were apathetic to it all and decided or were convinced to join the SO/staff either because they didn’t want to go to college, their friends were doing it, and/or their parents made them. Because CCI is relaxed and full of 2nd/3rd gen-ers who are more or less the same, their amused contempt for Scientology only grew the more time they spent in and the more involved they became, and they view it as a joke, openly mocking it and mentally separating themselves from the true clamlievers, which, again, is possible because they most likely went to wog schools and/or had wog friends that kept them in touch with the real world.

              That is just my theory though. Whoever it is and whatever the circumstances or validity of it, I still maintain that it is awesome, hilarious, entertaining and kinda ballsy. Even if it was total bullshit, the fact that it definitely pisses off the cult and OSA is of itself worth it. I wonder what Tony thinks of it….probably not much.

            • Captain Howdy

              Maybe it’s Bijou Phillips.

            • SP ‘Onage

              Or, Leah Remini? She is a sassy comic. 🙂

          • Spackle Motion

            I see that blog as credible as the unregistered idiotic posts at WWP. It’s like watching Dynasty reruns, which is another guilty secret of mine.

            • Espiando

              True, but Anons wear less shoulder pads.

  • Mark

    That bloody downvoting troll’s back! SHOW YOURSELF, YOU COWARD!

    • Captain Howdy

      Ignore. It’s just a mouse that is deluded enough to think it’s a cat. Everyone gets all excited and ‘poof’ the arrows will disappear again. Don’t play the lame game.

      • Mark

        Yes, they usually go if you reload the page. Still, what with all the invisible and invisible trolls, someone’s getting worried about us…

        • Robert Eckert

          Do you think it could be Davey himself this time? The actions are not like the Downboys we’ve had before, and maybe this is getting personal for him. In which case: HI DAVE! And give my best to Shelly!

          • Mark

            Yeah – hello, shortarse!

            • Robert Eckert

              Wow, that drew down-arrows toot-sweet!

            • Robert Eckert

              While I’ve got you on the line, Dave: was LRH dead before or after you forged the will?

            • Mark

              Yeah – what he said!

          • Espiando

            Good evening, COB RTC. That would be, ahem, short for “Completely and Overtly Bullshit Repulsive Terrifying Cult”. Or if you want to personalize it, just substitute the “l” in “cult” with an “n”.

          • L. Wrong Hubturd

            I have such a wicked grin right now. I’m imagining der Dwarfenfuhrer sitting at a desk each night reading this blog. Oh imaginary deity in sky, please make it true.

  • Observer

    Okay then

    • BuryTheNuts2

      Winner. Here is your trophy

      • Observer

        I want OTVIIIisGrrr8! to present it.

        • Mark

          He should rescind Tommy-girl’s vast gong (which is far too heavy for such a tiny person) and give it to you, Observer.

      • stateofcircle

        The sword blade was submerged into a pool of baby tears before it was affixed to the 500 carat gold base that was smelted by Native American orphans, then it was shipped via Virgin Galactic to Burkana Faso, where it was engraved by elderly villagers using only their finger nails.

        • L. Wrong Hubturd

          Ah, Virgin Galactic. Such exciting times. Love the Richard Branson. We need more crazies like him.

    • Captain Howdy

      I see a coffee table book in your near future. And remember, we have a verbal agreement for 20%

      • BuryTheNuts2

        Actually, Bella snagged her for a little business alliance first!

        • Captain Howdy

          Show me the comment and the date. My agreement with O is at least a couple of months old. And..I’ll sue..I will!

          • BuryTheNuts2

            Nope, I am too lazy. Bella will have to fend for herself on this one.

            I don’t get a percentage, and I refuse to do the discovery for free.
            Now for a small fee………………

    • Espiando

      Does anyone else find the clam…well, amusingly cute in a Muppet sort of way?

      • BuryTheNuts2

        YES…and I find ‘that’ sort of disturbing!

        • Mark

          Synchronicity rules – I’ve just been watching ‘Les Yeux Sans Visage’.

      • Captain Howdy

        The Muppet’s always disturbed me, not as much as HR Pufnstuf though. That shit disturbed me more than Salo.

        • Espiando

          Remember, I was the target age for the Krofft stuff when it first aired. I consider it a key factor regarding why I take psychoactive medication today.

          • Captain Howdy

            I’m serious. I had really bad nightmares when I was young — one was a nightly reoccurring one that lasted almost a year and almost drove me insane. Something about HR Pufnstuf reminds me of those dreams.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              I used to have a recurring nightmare that a wolf was on the roof of my bedroom. I had a glass ceiling (we wont go there)…but anyhow…the wolf would stare at me and he had a saucepan…

              Eventually…I would run and he would chase me around the house. My mom was vacuuming and I was screaming but she couldn’t hear me.

              I had that thing over and over for at least a year or two. I can still see that wolfs face!

            • Captain Howdy

              My dream would start soon as i laid down because in the dream I was still awake lying in my.bed. All of the sudden reptilian hands would shoot up from underneath the end of the bed and grab my legs and pull me underneath the bed dragging me at breakneck speed down a hellish tunnel where creatures were living in the walls to meet my arch nemesis King Frog and his henchman Baby Huey. They would torture me for hours laughing and mocking me.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              facepalm

        • BuryTheNuts2

          OOOH, me too. Wow, I had totally BLOCKED HR Pufnstuf.

          Thanks for the Restim Capt!!!

          • Mark

            Aargh! “H.R. Pufnstuf, can’t do too little when he can’t do enough” … Jack Wilde totally miscast … Tommy and his magic flute … giant pulsating toadstools…

            I’m going back to watch the rest of ‘Les Yeux Sans Visage’ (about a mad surgeon who cuts people’s faces off) before I have nightmares. And if that doesn’t work, I’ll watch ‘Les Diaboliques’ as well.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              I am sorry, but that shit was just wrong on all levels…
              Nightmare freaking wrong!!!

              Ooh, you had nightmares too i see.

            • Mark

              (Don’t mention the Banana Splits, BTN, or we’ll be here all night).

            • BuryTheNuts2

              I have a theory that “All” cartoonists are deviants!

              Example: all of those old movie cartoon reels with the heavy sexual innuendo!

              I have found myself spontaneously laughing about something Bugs Bunny said (that I just finally ‘got’ at like forty years old ,) that I actually watched in the theater right before they played the original Planet of the Apes!!!

            • Observer

              Tra la la
              La la la la
              Tra la la
              La la la la

            • Captain Howdy

              The theme song was awesome though.

              http://youtu.be/urMheS5qpmg

            • BuryTheNuts2

              Nope. Not listening.

            • Captain Howdy

              try it..you’ll like it..I guarantee.

        • Observer

          I *loved* Stupid Bat.

    • q-bird

      predator eyes! in a clam!! *under* the dang bridge!!!
      wonderful image Obs – just splendid m’dear!

    • 0tessa

      So…, this is the real Miscavige!

    • Sidney18511

      Ahhhh, too cute. It’s a clam troll!

  • media_lush

    Just a simple question…. how come Tiny Fists is still in control?…. I mean, we all know he’s a sociopath and all that but he’s not exactly the biggest guy, hell even Suri could probably knock him out at a push. Who is physically protecting him…. are they beefy private security or brain-dead well fed OSAbots? Surely even the most devoted are on some kind of major perks that they must feel will be cut off sooner rather than later… and god forbid all the “complicity” to harm/defraud/abuse charges can’t have passed them by as keep him in power makes them an accomplice. Even some of the foul pustule sucking lawyers he employs must be starting to have second thoughts.

    I have this vision that the first person to physically slap him hard will turn him into a gibbering wreck….

    • Missionary Kid

      You’r being logical. His control is all emotional. Realize that those around him have been conditioned to tread him as a big being. He then keeps them off balance by shifting status up and down at his whim.

      That keeps those under him in a continual state of fear.
      They fear they’ll lose their status.
      They fear they’ll lose their eternity.
      They fear they’ll lose their family.

      They are all beholden to DM.
      All of their lives have been structured by a system that keeps them away from feelings, opposing opinions, and their own thoughts.

      • media_lush

        I understand, but surely there must be someone who’s going to give him a smack sooner or later…. I just find it totally unbelievable that he can maintain this level of control…. just sayin’

        • BuryTheNuts2

          I agree, he is not the only person with a loose temper.
          And when someone loses that temper they do things they otherwise would not. It isn’t rational.
          I am not advocating violence, but I am still surprised he hasn’t had his ass handled to him.

        • Missionary Kid

          Again, you’re being logical. There is nothing logical about beliefs, and especially cults. (I’m not equating the two). Co$ is one big conditioning machine, and people who get involved are gradually seduced by their own desires and emotions.

          At every level, the person is faced with moveable goals. Things are always going to get better at the next level, course, if one fails, it’s always their fault, and not $cientology’s.

          People are indoctrinated to think that the {tech} is {perfect}. LRH is {perfect}. If there’s a problem, it’s theirs. Since they are isolated from anything to contradict anything to contradict the message, they accept it.

          DM’s volatility keeps them on edge. They don’t know what is coming down the pike. The paranoia about the rest of the world, and the us vs. them mentality also keeps everyone in line.

          • Lurkness

            Plus the urgent make-work projects and no sleep, sustains a crisis atmosphere and prevents the exercise of sound judgment. He also travels with a rat-pack to protect against retaliation.

        • Robert Eckert

          He’s a roid-rage type. I would not want to get into a physical fight with him.

        • L. Wrong Hubturd

          I thought at some point, Headly shoved him up against a wall.

    • scnethics

      These are peace-loving idealists who eat crappy food, don’t sleep enough and sit at desks all day. He, on the other hand, is violent and spends all day figuring out new ways to dominate people. Have you seen the “We Stand Tall” music video. Not a lot of ballers in that crowd. I think he’ll have to go to prison before he gets a taste of his own medicine.

  • richelieu jr

    Sorry, this is just TOO delicious!

    From Marty’s blog, and commenter saying how brilliant the book is (Marty chose a bunch of comments from the comment section to go against the ‘rumors and untruths’ and bad reviews he’d gotten. Most are reasonable. Some incomprehensible members-only Scilon gobbledy-gook, and a lot are the usual slathering Rathbunnies…) This guy was suggesting that all commenters be required to read all three of Marty’s books so their stupid questions wouldn’t waste his time! I am so not kidding! All the answers are there, folks!:

    Dan Koon:

    By the way, Marty, I just finished your book and really, really
    enjoyed it. You filled in a LOT of blanks for me about what went on
    during various periods. So a big thanks for taking the time to put it
    all down. Tony Ortega slammed it, which, having now read it, is about
    what I would expect from someone who refuses to experience any part of
    the subject subjectively but who depends on the experiences of those who
    do and did for his livelihood. I understand he is writing a book. I can
    tell right now it is going to be a piece of crap. The guy has been
    writing about Scn for 20 years and never opened Self Analysis. He should
    watch The Master and then do the window and wall process for as long as
    Freddie Quell.

    • BuryTheNuts2

      Slathering Rathbunnies….snort

      From Self Analysis:
      Can you remember a time when you had a good loaf?

      Yeah….I am serious.

      Full disclosure. I liked self analysis….mostly.

      • Espiando

        In what respect? Laziness, bread, or bowel movement? I’ve laid in bed for three hours while my bread maker was running, only to get up to take a shit. Does that count as all three?

        • BuryTheNuts2

          A threefurr. Hell ya!

      • Captain Howdy

        Culinary, sexual or bowel related? This is a serious subject, please try to treat as such.

        • L. Wrong Hubturd

          You’re a little slow on the uptake. Espy beat ya to the punch line.

          • Espiando

            Worse than that. He read it and upvoted it.

            • L. Wrong Hubturd

              Too much potato juice.

          • Captain Howdy

            Ha, Ha..good one.. I’ll have to remember that one.

    • Espiando

      Marty put that up to try to mend some fences with Ocean’s Eleven or whatever they’re calling themselves. Koon is the most sane of that particular bunch. He also has mammoth blinders on when it comes to the Tech. Koon sees himself as the heir to David Mayo’s throne, considering how much work he’s done “recovering” original checksheets and such. He takes any attack on the Tech as a personal assault, and considering what Tony and Vance did to Diarrhetics and what Tony and PZ are going to do to Histeria of Man, he froths at the mouth like he’s a cappuccino maker whenever Tony’s name is mentioned. He’s also pushing Self-Analysis as the master key at bringing in fresh meat, like his buddy Steve Hall.

      In other words, business as usual from the Martians. It’s just Marty pimping his book and Koon white-knighting anyone who wants to take on Tony.

      • richelieu jr

        Thanks so much for the names and perspective. I have no way of pacing any of this stuff n context, except of course for Marty flogging his book as misunderstood masterpiece…

        • Captain Howdy

          Marty plugs his “book” more than a working girl plugs her snatch during Fleet Week, And Dan Koon will always be “Can Loon” to me. These ‘children” need a “wog” SRA of the first order.

          • richelieu jr

            Don’t know Koon, but his name always makes me laugh because of Shakespeare’s ‘Henry IV”

          • Sidney18511

            oh cap’n…..you do have a way with words!

      • aquaclara

        I like “Martians” and “Rathbunnies.”

        • Espiando

          They’re very good when served on al dente angel hair with alfredo sauce.

          • aquaclara

            Yum!

    • Spackle Motion

      Yes, this makes sense because ALL book reviewers subjectively experience that which they are reviewing, including fiction.

      What a moron.

    • L. Wrong Hubturd

      Dan must also be hitting the spice melange, because he has peered into the future and seen that TO’s book is crap. Gaaarrrhhhhh. Blood pressure not supposed to go up on the weekend.

      • richelieu jr

        Do you understand nothing, finally, L Wrong? He understands this SUBJECTIVELY!

        • richelieu jr

          Actually, this does remind me of a beautiful, successful, well-educated girlfriend of mine that when caught out on some ridiculous assertion (Aborignes have cured cancer and we can’t use the same techniques because we don’t believe hard enough (the ‘Tinkerbell’ theory of science, much in evidence in Scilooniland), that orgasm denial (only for men, mind you) leads to the biggest orgasm of all because it is a mental ejaculation and that it had been proven after these ‘ejaculations’ that men have no sperm left in their testicles, some FOREVER! are two that spring to mind), would always retort:

          You cannot say that I’m not right about how I FEEL!

          Last I heard she was ‘clear’ and treading water..

          • Missionary Kid

            Sad. A perfect candidate for woo-woo.

        • L. Wrong Hubturd

          {meanie}

    • stateofcircle

      Did I miss something when I read Tonys review? Because I don’t remember him slamming in. In fact, I just ‘re read the review, and clearly I must have an MU. Tony was critical about some things, yes, but constructively so in my opinion. And I believe, if my eyes weren’t playing tricks on me, there was even a few compliments. Gasp! Obviously I don’t need to point out the irony of someone criticising others for not reading things when…oh nevermind.

      Oh yeah, and good job assuming you have any idea about what Tony has read or knows. And spot on with the presumptuous degradation, Dan Koon. Thank God Tony read your undoubtedly fascinating paper on Super Power so I, admittedly, didn’t have to.I’m kind of surprised an expert on Super Power even has to read books. Can’t you just hold it up to your head and absorb all of the words? And I’m assuming that you are basing your prediction about Tony ‘s book on the fact that, since you have Super Powers, you can see into the future. Do you think you can take a look for me and get some lotto numbers? And maybe find Shelley while you’re there.

      • Jeb Burton

        Marty threw a fit when Tony pointed out he did not do a good job of explaining a few events which he was heavily involved in. But overall, if i remember right, he said it was worth reading. Marty is very thin skinned for an ultimate warrior. I started reading his blog to find out about the squirrel busters thing, but lately the self promotion, with testimonials, is tedious at best. But at least his commentators worship him like a god.

  • media_lush

    off topic but the Zimmerman trial have reached a verdict and it’s expected in the next 10 minutes…. Sky Ch 506 in UK

    • media_lush

      NOT GUILTY!

      • L. Wrong Hubturd

        Not getting anywhere near Sandford for a while.

        • Robert Eckert

          I don’t intend to enter that state again. This will doubtless lead to many more gun killings since any kind of fight is now an excuse to shoot the other dead.

          • L. Wrong Hubturd

            HA! You got downed and it has nothing to do with Scilons.

            • Espiando

              I can’t be the only one that happens to over here. Welcome to the club, Robert. Your complimentary drink coupon is in your membership pack, and what size of “I’m A Troll At Heart” t-shirt do you wear?

            • Robert Eckert

              Davey has been following me around downing every post of mine since I called him out, so it might not be a George Zimmerman defender

      • Captain Howdy

        Good luck to all my friends in Florida.

      • Sidney18511

        FLORIDA…….making Texas look intelligent. I’m a Floridian, and the stupidity NEVER ceases to amaze me. Zimmerman will be the newest RWNJ’s hero. Expect to see him on Faux news tommorrow, after all, he did what the other scumbags can only DREAM about doing. Discusting. I wish that the Martin family would slap him with a civil suit.

    • Captain Howdy

      Oh shit !

  • Off topic but for those of you who haven’t drug yourself away from this blog today, Davey CANCELLED the event of the Century tonight.

    http://www.mikerindersblog.org/keystone-kops-cancel-most-important-event-ever/

    • Robert Eckert

      Oooh! Oooh! He promises that another bomb will hit Miscavige on Monday! Presumably the Big story that Tony alluded to?

      • I know, can’t they just drop the bomb today while he’s already shell shocked. I have to work all freaking day Monday. By the time I get a chance to see/comment on the bomb all the best snark will be long gone.

        • Robert Eckert

          There’s nothing more unsatisfying than posting a good bit of sarcasm and finding that somebody beat you to it hours ago.

          • Yeah, I usually don’t even bother to post after 5, all the good stuff has been said.

  • stillgrace

    “Believe me, the bombs that have been landing on Miscavige’s bunker in the last couple of weeks have been shaking his little kingdom. And there is another one coming on Monday.” <- A quote from Mike Rinder's post today.

    Indeed, I have felt a storm brewing. Hints from Tony. Is anyone else wondering "What's next?" Scientology watching is the best true crime cliffhanger experience ever.

    • L. Wrong Hubturd

      The anticipation is killing me.

      • stateofcircle

        Me freaking’ too. A hint maybe? Just a little, itty bitty hint please??

        • ThetaBara

          Could it be some legal news, perhaps? Court is generally not in session on Sundays …

          • Lurkness

            Filing of class action lawsuit? Civil RICO?

      • Leslie Stipe

        Yes, and Sunday will be the longest day in history!

        • stillgrace

          I’m hoping Tony will have some Funnies for us to help pass the time. What could it be for Monday? Something big, I have ideas- but pure speculation, so Imma wait.

          • Espiando

            Sunday Funnies has become a highlight of my week, right up there with midnight GMT on Friday, when the BBC News website puts up its Quiz Of The Week.

            I live a very sad and pathetic life.

            • stillgrace

              Chuckling. Join the club.

            • Leslie Stipe

              Ditto! And I won’t let myself even come to this site until I have all my housework done for Sunday! It makes me work faster – motivation.
              I’m already planning on going into work early Monday so I won’t be bothered when 7 am rolls around.

          • Leslie Stipe

            I’m anxious for 7 am too. I need some Sunday Funnies to get me through this. I read they cancelled tonight’s event on Twitter and called my mother to tell her. I’ve been taking care of her all week and it was either talk about Scientology or the J.P. Morgan Mafia so I chose Scientology!
            She asked me, “Is that the one with the t-shirt giveaway?” I really didn’t think she was listening or would remember! I was so impressed until she said, “Well, bless their hearts.” No. No. No. It was such a good conversation up until then!

            • stillgrace

              Your mom story made me laugh!

            • Leslie Stipe

              I’m glad. She made my BP go up!

          • Robert Eckert

            There was some talk that Katie Holmes was only bound to silence for one year from the divorce settlement (which was July 9). That’s my speculation about what this is about.

            • Leslie Stipe

              I heard that too but I don’t think that’s it. I don’t know why I think that, I just do. It would be great if it were true!

            • stillgrace

              You may be right. That could be quite juicy. I’m hoping that damaged fence at the secret hideaway means someone met Shelly there with a spare pantsuit and helped her escape. (spare pantsuit = old joke from the Headley GoFundMe)

            • Lurkness

              I don’t know about this. The timing of the leaks about Tom Cruise writing her a “let’s be friends/I still love you” letter has all the hallmarks of trying to buy her off. OTH, it is a sign TC’s camp is worried something may be coming.

    • SP ‘Onage

      I love “Milk of Magnesia Mondays” at the Bunker.

  • Douglas D. Douglas

    Help the noob.

    Where, exactly, was this “event of the century” happening. Clearwater? Or was it one of those video extravaganzas that were to roll out all over the country in the Ideal Orgs?

    The reason I ask is because I finally entered one of the sacred precincts this week (won’t say which one just now), and asked for a copy of “The Way to Happiness.” I was handed off to two different people (guess they weren’t terribly busy) before being guided into the book store, where they first tried to sell me a hardcover ($15), then a bundle of TWTH ($17) before realizing I really wasn’t going to buy anything. As I was leaving I saw a stack of flyers on the counter. They even tried to dissuade me from taking a questionnaire (“We ask our visitors to fill them out before they leave.”) They did, finally, actually give me a DVD entitled “The Wy to Happiness: An Introduction,” I assume to get me to leave.

    The flyer I picked up was for “The Turning Point,” the event from tonight. But I am not in Clearwater (that much I will attest), so again, I ask– where was this event being held?

    • stateofcircle

      Why do you think they wanted you out of there? We’re you being snarky, mister?

      • Douglas D. Douglas

        I was being so polite and circumspect it would have made you vomit. I was in a hurry and really just wanted a copy of TWTH in pamphlet form. I know the CoS is loath to give away anything, but hope, you know, springs eternal.

        I did get in a single zinger, just as I was headed out the door. I noted that the front shelves were filled with row after row of identical copies of Dianetics. So I asked, in my best confused tone, “Why do you sell only book here?”

    • stillgrace

      Mike Rinder has been talking about this stuff and has a copy of that flyer in his post today. They offered a complimentary BBQ at the Fort Harrison with free babysitting for the event, but ended up cancelling it.
      There’s more background info in his previous posts.
      http://www.mikerindersblog.org/

      • scnethics

        This is a big deal. Never in my life have I seen an event cancelled. Never!

        • Robert Eckert

          Behold, the god who bleeds!

        • Lurkness

          That he is also not holding the MV event this year on this, its 25th/Silver Anniversary, is also telling. To then cancel the substitute event is even more telling.

    • Espiando

      In Clearwater at Fort Homicide. That’s Mike’s happy hunting ground. It was supposed to be the substitute for the Maiden Voyage event, one of the Scinos’ biggest shindigs of the year (money-wise; all of the whales get dragged aboard the SS Mesothelioma to get flensed). This year was supposed to be the silver anniversary of Maiden Voyage. Instead, they were going to get the premiere of a film about the mess-stravaganza that was the Portland Crusade thirty years ago.

      The traditional 30th anniversary gift is pearls. So this was Scientology’s Pearls Before Swine. Make your own “pearl necklace” joke and insert it here.

      • Douglas D. Douglas

        Thanks.

        I think….

      • Lurkness

        The video presentation was for the 20th Annivesary of the victory in the war with the IRS. Apparenty, DM had been busy editing the video to take out the references to Marty, Heber and others so that it is all now about the glory and hard work of dwarfenfuhrer.

  • PreferToBeAnon2

    Anyone home? Just got in, logged on and am overwhelmed with the amount of comments to catch up on. So, I went into denial, cruised over to Rinder’s and saw his mysterious hint about something happening Monday. Have ya’ll cracked that yet? Did I miss anything else today? Things sure seem to be happening rather fast…

    I see DM cancelled his big IAS event tonight, hours before it was to start… no doubt, afraid to confront a dwindling crowd as well as the question that is snaking through the US and Europe right now, “Where’s Shelly?” Or even, “What happened with Leah?” Then there is the, “How is your sister, Denise, doing? And the dreaded, “Now that we are getting trained, when are the doors to the Suppahhh Powahhh building opening?” He’d rather keep company with his Scotch, I’m sure.

    • SP ‘Onage

      Plus after this week, he’s a laughing stock in Hollywood. Might as well close down the Celebrity Center because he’s PTS to the Stars.

      He needs a “Cheer Up David Miscavige!” site. Lmao

    • Lurkness

      Dwarfenfurer’s confront is clearly not up to answering those questions, even presuming someone had the brass or f’ing rank to ask them. How many more events can he cancel before they figure out the train is off the rails.

    • Douglas D. Douglas

      Lotsa downvoters out in force tonight! Guess they have time on their hands since the little shindig in Clearwater was cancelled…

  • Lady Squash

    It’s not about who were the SPs? It is that the SP tech is completely bogus. IMHO

  • stateofcircle

    Sorry to be the bearer of very sad news… “Glee” star Cory Monteith passed away. Whether you like the show or hate it, it is so very sad. Things like this help put in perspective how important a human life really is and how much it should be cared for. Whether it is a young star, a beautiful 36 year old woman, a young girl trying to recover from addiction, a young man in treatment being neglected, or the wife of a religious leader, life is sacred and has meaning, and when it ends there is nothing else that can be done to save it, so it is important to do whatever we can to help stop any more needless death from happening.

    http://www.npr.org/blogs/thetwo-way/2013/07/14/201947778/actor-cory-monteith-who-played-finn-hudson-on-glee-found-dead

    I apologize if this seems a bit over the top or upsetting, but I can’t help but be snapped back into reality and realize that there are real consequences for some of the people we discuss here, and I really hope that we are helping to bring awareness to as many people as possible about the real, human damage that at stake.

    • Robert Eckert

      Nothing official about cause of death, but they did say “no signs of foul play”. The odds-on bet is drug overdose.

      • stateofcircle

        Sadly, I think so too, he was in recovery.

    • Douglas D. Douglas

      He was only 31…

  • 0tessa

    If I understand Rinder correctly – Monday there will be real trouble in paradise. I can’t wait.

    • DodoTheLaser

      Yeah. I hope it’s about Leah Remini.

      • 0tessa

        That could very well be the case.

        • DodoTheLaser

          Leah really need to talk now. Most media seem to have a short attention span.

  • DodoTheLaser

    Scientology is a lie system.
    Scientologists lie to themselves and others.

    Not for much longer. The tide is high, the shore is low.

    Celtic Frost (Monotheist) – Winter (Requiem)

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFYi7MHrSFI

  • mook
  • phronsie

    Okay, that’s the first time I’ve heard the fruit loop speak; was that “oooooie awe” voice supposed to charm or impress?? Maybe if I was an attention starved three year old being promised a penny pulled out of my ear!