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More proof of Kerri Kasem’s Scientology involvement, and Laura Prepon lies like a rug


We told you previously that we don’t envy the judges presiding over the sordid mess surrounding American Top 40 deejay Casey Kasem, 82, as he slips away into dementia.

Kasem’s wife of 34 years, Jean, and his daughter from a previous marriage, Kerri, are locked in a bitter fight over how to care for him in his final days. Kerri has convinced a Los Angeles Superior Court judge that the best thing for her father is to withhold food and drink as he slips away. There may be a very good medical reason for this, and we’d rather not second-guess a judge in a tough spot.

But we’re still learning more about Kerri’s involvement in Scientology, which Jean has raised as an issue in the matter. Last time, we told you that Kerri’s friendship with Scientology clown prince Grant Cardone and a report from one of our inside sources suggested that Kerri’s involvement was more extensive than she’s been letting on.

And now, we have an on-the-record account from one of our most trusted sources.

“I was friends with Kerri Kasem,” says Tiziano Lugli, who left Scientology in 2010 and has become one of the more visible ex-members of the church. A music producer in Los Angeles, he’s put out numerous videos about Scientology.

Tiziano says that when he decided to ditch Scientology, he talked to Kerri about his reasons for leaving.

“I briefed her all about David Miscavige, Marty Rathbun, and what happens on the Bridge,” he says, referring to Scientology’s embattled leader (Miscavige), a top former official who had started speaking out about abuses in the church (Rathbun), and secrets of the upper levels of Scientology that newer members are prevented from knowing (the Bridge). “She listened to everything, and she agreed with everything I had to say.”

Even though she seemed to sympathize with him, Tiziano says, she explained that she really couldn’t leave Scientology herself because of the good deal she was getting.

“They were giving her some quick, free program to get Clear. It was kind of unheard of at the time,” Tiziano says. “She said, ‘I just want to finish the program and get to Clear. Then we’ll be friends again’.”

He laughs at that, saying it was obviously just a way to dismiss his concerns. She seemed determined to take enough courses to go “Clear” — Scientology’s major intermediate goal before members move on to the upper “Operating Thetan” levels, with ‘auditing’ that costs hundreds of dollars an hour.

“She was definitely in Scientology, and she was doing courses,” he says.

Jean Kasem has made the accusation that Kerri is trying to get control of her father’s money so she can give it to Scientology. We don’t know if that’s true. But what seems increasingly clear is that Kerri’s involvement in Scientology is much greater than she’s indicated in press statements.


Laura_PreponLaura Prepon lies like a rug on Fusion

Laura Prepon appeared on the nascent Fusion network and engaged in some of the most blatant dishonesty we’ve seen from a celebrity in a long time.

Prepon was dogged with questions when it was announced that she’d be largely absent from the second season of the wildly successful series Orange Is The New Black. Because she was portraying a lesbian on the show, the entertainment media wondered if Prepon was reducing her involvement because of Scientology’s well-known homophobia.

In the interview, it’s made clear that Prepon’s reduced involvement in the show was caused by a scheduling conflict. OK, fair enough. But then Prepon goes on to utter this canard…

“I’ve been a Scientologist since 1999 and I’ve never come across any piece of information that remotely is negative or derogatory in any way towards the LGBT community.”

It’s a shame her interviewer didn’t know even the most basic information about Scientology, because then she might have asked…

Ms. Prepon, how could you be a 15-year member of Scientology and not have read its most basic text — the Bible of Scientology, as it were — L. Ron Hubbard’s 1950 bestseller, Dianetics: The Modern Science of Mental Health? Here’s what Hubbard had to say about “perversion” in that book…

The sexual pervert (and by this term dianetics, to be brief, includes any and all forms of deviation in Dynamic II such as homosexuality, lesbianism, sexual sadism, etc. and all down the catalogue of Ellis and Krafft-Ebing) is actually quite ill physically. Perversion as an illness has so many manifestations that it must be spread through the entire gamut of classes from (1) to (5) above. Overdevelopment of sexual organs, underdevelopment, seminal inhibition or magnification, etc. are found in one pervert, some in another. And the sum of it is that the pervert is always a very ill person in one way or another, whether he is conscious of it or not.

Soon after publishing Dianetics, Hubbard then more fully developed something he called the “Tone Scale,” which measures the state of human emotions, with a score of 40 at the top (“Serenity of Beingness”) and -40 at the bottom (“Total Failure”).

He assigned the score of 1.1 to “Covert Hostility,” which included “perversion.” Said Hubbard in his 1951 book Science of Survival, “A 1.1 is the most dangerously insane person in society, and is likely to cause the most damage.”

To this day, Scientologists refer to people who are gay or lesbian as “1.1,” and they are considered to be damaged people who need to “handle” their homosexuality if they want to remain in the church.

We have talked to many former Scientologists, some who were in the church’s highest positions, who confirm that Scientology teaching held that the goal of counseling — “auditing” — is to raise a person’s tone scale level, and so a homosexual could escape being “1.1” by paying for courses. It is, in other words, a purported “gay cure.”

Previously, we’ve written at length about recent examples of Scientology’s homophobia. We wrote about Keith Relkin, an active Scientologist in West Hollywood who tried to make the church more gay-friendly, but admitted to friends that he had failed miserably. And we wrote about Derek Bloch, a young man who was kicked out of Scientology’s “Sea Org” once he admitted that he was gay, and then was disowned by his family after he expressed doubts about the church.

Any 15-year member of Scientology would be thoroughly familiar with Dianetics, Science of Survival, the Tone Scale, and the notion of gay and lesbian members “handling” their homosexuality through auditing.

Laura Prepon is a liar.


The difficult life of a Scientology attorney

Another fun video from Karen de la Carriere and Jeffrey Augustine…



Our alternate take

In regards to yesterday’s fun story from Joe Childs at the Tampa Bay Times about an attorney and his wife being banned from a wedding reception at Scientology’s Fort Harrison Hotel because the attorney, Denis deVlaming, had faced Scientology in litigation in the past…

Here’s our alternate take: What kind of jackasses rent the friggin’ Fort Harrison Hotel for a wedding reception?

Instead of bawling to the Tampa Bay Times about their friends not being able to attend, they should read about Lisa McPherson and shut the F up.

Just our two cents.


Posted by Tony Ortega on June 12, 2014 at 06:00

E-mail your tips and story ideas to or follow us on Twitter. We post behind-the-scenes updates at our Facebook author page. Here at the Bunker we try to have a post up every morning at 7 AM Eastern (Noon GMT), and on some days we post an afternoon story at around 2 PM. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Learn about Scientology with our numerous series with experts…

BLOGGING DIANETICS (We read Scientology’s founding text) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25

UP THE BRIDGE (Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47

GETTING OUR ETHICS IN (Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14

SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING (Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43

PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | Scientology’s Private Dancer


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  • Missionary Kid

    Future location of list #3

  • Missionary Kid

    Future location of list #2

  • Missionary Kid

    Future location of list #1

  • DeElizabethan

    Tid-bit! “Jean and Casey were staying with friends about 10 miles from my place until
    the daughter – Kerri, got involved.” This from my nephew in the Bremerton area.

  • Pierrot

    *** RED X +–+ RED X +–+RED X +–+ RED X ***
    They lurk in CL seeking and enticing their prey in their web of lies.
    they target the weak, the lonely, the depressed, the sick, the idealist
    In CL they peddle their false promises of cure, companionship, friendship,
    They tout the dream of an ideal world in peace, free of poverty and disease.

  • Tendernob

    Kerri Kasem is no longer denying she’s a Scientologist… here ya go:

    Here she is on video, interviewed by Mirit Strausman and Tama Leia (both very vocal Scientologists), proclaiming her love for Study Tech.

  • Missionary Kid

    DAVID, I am not insane, MI$CAVIGE NICKNAMES
    Zygote Munter
    Zero Nero
    Your Holeness
    Xenu’s Chew Toy
    Wizard of Ooze
    winzig Fuhrer [little Fuhrer]
    wiggler in chief
    Wee, sleekit, cow’rin’, tim’rous beastie [Ref: Robert Burns]
    wee sleekit Beastie (small, sly, wicked beast – Robert Burns)
    Wee Pontifex
    Wee One
    wee nubbin
    Wee Davey
    Weazle Monkey
    Wavey Davey (Also Wavy Davy)
    virulent bastard
    violently slapping lunatic
    violently insane dwarf
    Violent Midget
    Vicar of victimisation…
    Vicar Most Vicious
    vertically challenged pope
    Urban Blight
    Unnameable One
    Unctuous Oiliness Supreme
    Tyrannosaurus Minimus
    Twerpus Humonculous
    Turd Pope
    Turd Nugget
    tuffed McCabbage
    Troll McTurdsniffer
    Tricky Dickhead
    Toxic Midget
    Toxic Dwarf
    tormentor-in-chief tosser-of-clams (TIC TOC)
    Tom Thumb of The Cult of $cientology.
    Tom Riddle (Voldemort’s real name)
    Tolouse Laucavige.
    Tinyfists Mustravage
    Tiny Tyrant
    Tiny Twat
    Tiny Titmouse King
    tiny testees
    Tiny Terror
    Tiny Tadger
    Tiny Sphincter
    Tiny Psycho
    Tiny Nuts
    Tiny Hook [Ref: Peter Pan]
    Tiny Fists
    Tiny Fist Fuckface
    tiny dicked midget
    Tiny Dick(tator)
    Tiny dick
    Tiny Dave
    Tiny Dancer
    Tiny Cuntroller
    Tiny Crackpot
    Tiny Corn COB
    Tiny Cancer
    Tiny Boots
    Tiny Booted one
    Tiny Ahab
    tim’rous beastie [Ref: Robert Burns]
    Tight-y Tiny Tyrant
    Thetan of Satan
    The Toeless One (refer to all his footbullets)
    The Tiny Terror of Tootville
    The pimp of Scientology
    the perverter
    The official “Pimp” of Scientology
    The Man Who Just Didn’t Get It
    The Little Man With Asbestos Riddled Brains
    The Little Fisticuff
    The Lawn Ornament
    The Knight Who Says “Nix”.
    The Joker
    The ElfMan
    The Elfish one.
    the Dildo of our Disconnect
    The Dark Lord Chuckles The Silly Piggy
    the Choke of Scamatology
    The Cheshire Cat
    Teratogenic Tyrant
    Teflon Pope
    Teflon Con
    Teeny Weinie
    Teeny Teratogenic
    teeny little homunculus
    Tater Tot
    Supreme Commander Of the Holy Battleship (SCOHB)
    Suppressive Pipsqueak
    Stumpy Blackheart
    Stinking Cabbage
    Squirm Worm
    spokesmidget for Scilontoology
    spoilt poison dwarf
    Snortimer Pigglesworth
    Smelly Squatbottom**
    Smarmy Smurf
    Small group leader
    Smack Daddy
    Slappy the Punching Pope
    Slappy the Eight Minute Wonder Ref: Short speech at SP building opening.
    Slappy Squirrel
    Slappy Slakbladder**
    Slappy Miscmidget
    Slappy Miscassface
    Slappy McPunch
    Slappy McNutts
    slappy little worm
    slapping midget
    slapping little worm
    slapping dwarf
    Slap Happy
    Sixty-One inches of mean
    Sie Gott verdamme Schwanzlutscher auf dem Hollywood Boulevard (YSCOHB)
    Sideshow COB
    Shrimp Pimp
    Shouty Shortarse**
    Shorty McFistTiCuffs
    Short Stalin
    Short Notice
    Short Dave Silvers
    Short Bus Shorty
    Short Bus Davy
    Shit nugget.
    Shirvell’d Dwarf-Balls**
    scurvy rat
    scum beneath the sewage
    Scruffy McStuffy, the Tiny Titmouse King
    Scruffy McStuffy
    Scientolgy’s Pope
    Sci Furher
    Scabby Bitch
    Sawed-Off Cocksucker
    Savage Shrimp
    Savage Misdickus
    Savage Miscavage Mustravage
    Savage Miscavage
    savage Dwarf
    sailor boy
    sadistic dwarf
    Runt Squirrel
    Runt in Charge.
    Ruinous Runt
    Royal Douche nozzle
    Ron Burgundy of Cults
    Rodent of Unusual Size
    Rear Admiral Shortarse and bottoms
    Ratty Bratty Slappy
    Rancid Rat
    Ramrod Ron
    Rabid Piscabidge**
    Rabbi of Righteousness
    Quark Brain
    Punching Pope
    Punching Pontiff.
    psychotic munchkin dictator 
    Psycho Smurf
    Pseudo-Pope of the Unholy Alleged Church
    Pseudo Pope
    Prophet of Pain
    Prince Humperdink
    Priest of perversity…
    Prickus Americanus
    Power Mad Twerp
    potty-mouthed psychopath
    Popey the SeaOrg man
    Pope of Sps
    pope of sillyology
    Pope of Scientology
    Pope of Potty Mouth
    Pope of Penquins.
    Pope of Paranoia 
    Pope of Clearwater
    Pope of Clam Chowder
    Pope of Blackberry
    Pope Niblet
    Pope in Pampers
    Pope Homunculus I
    Pope Captain Blackheart
    Pope Asshole II
    Poop of Scientology
    Pontifex Minimus
    Pompous Pustulance
    Pompous Pope of Perdition
    Poison Pope
    Pocket Pope
    Planned Parenthood poster child.
    Pissant Toadstool
    Piscop of pissants. (Piscop=bishop in old English)
    Pint sized pontiff
    pinocchio on a footstool
    Pinnochio on a Toadstool
    Pimpo Novis
    Pimp-Slappy Mi$cavidge
    Pimp Imp
    Pharaoh Miscavige
    Petulant Pontiff
    petite tyrant
    person of interest Miscavige
    person of dubious height
    pathetic psychopath
    Paranoid Megalomaniac Sociopath
    paper tiger shrimp
    Papal Duncio
    Pajillero Pontiff (the wanker pontiff)
    Padre of Perdition
    Padre of Pendejos (father of dickheads)
    overdressed Ooompa Loompa
    Osama Bin Davey
    Org Ogre Most Unctuous,
    Oompa Loompa
    One shoe short of a midget.
    One hundred and fifty-five centimeters of mean
    One Fifty Five (his height in centimeters)
    oily fucker
    Oil sucker
    Obispo Es Bajo De Cajones(¨the short-as-fuck bishop)
    Oberslappenfuherer Miscavige
    noxious nanoid
    NotQuite51 (height in ft.& inches)
    Not-So-Secret Squirrel
    Not David Misquixote
    Not David Mismancha
    Nipple Head
    Nincompope of Scientology
    niblet (Ref: corn on the COB)
    Needle dick
    Nasty Little Puke-Face**
    Napoleon Mismanage
    nain sauvage (French for savage dwarf)
    Musty McFudgepacker
    Muff Cabbage
    Ms Scabbitch
    Mr. Slappy Toes
    Mr. Psycho
    Mr. Micromanage
    Mr. D. Mistaken4 aMan
    Mr. Cabbage
    Mr Stacked-heels.
    Mousketeer Malice
    Mouseking Midget
    Mouse-caviege His hole-iness
    Mouse-caviage, rodent king of the clams
    mouse King-Machiavellian midget-asthmatic dwarf
    Mouse king
    Motivated Demon
    Most Unctuous Oleaginosity
    Money Miscavige
    Money Badger
    Miz Panty Britches
    Miz Panty Bitches
    Miz Bitch
    Mister Scab-itch
    Mister Piece of Shit
    Missy Miscavige
    Missing Gasket
    Miss Tragic
    Miss Tradgedy
    Miss D. Meaner
    Miss Crab-itch 
    Miss Carnage
    Miss Cabbage
    Misfit Toy
    miserable asthmatic misanthropic pissmire
    Miscavarallies (for his morgue openings and other annual events)
    Miscavamatics (for his scientology math)
    minute Miscavige
    Minister of Malice
    Miniscule Miscreant
    miniature mobster
    Miniature Machiavelli
    Mini-Mountebank Miscsavage
    Mini Stalin
    Mini Me
    militant midget
    Mighty Mousse
    mighty mousse
    Mighty Mousecavige
    Mighty Mouse
    Mighty Mite
    mighty midget
    Mighty MEST
    mighty mental midget
    Midget Troll
    Midget Ron Burgandy of cults
    Midget Robespierre
    Midget Mouse
    Midget Miscavige
    Midget Makemerich
    midget fuckstick
    Midget fascist pseudo pop-up pope
    Midget Dwarf Miscatbitch
    Midget Dictator
    Midget Bitch
    Microscopic Madman
    micro miscavige
    Mexican Midget Wrestler
    Merchant of Chaos 
    mental midget
    meglomaniac middget
    Measly Dumbass
    McDivot Backstabbage
    Maus König
    Master Con
    Maniacal Midget
    Man of the Scotch
    Man of Steal
    Malignant Dwarf
    Malicious Dwarf
    malevolent homunculus
    madman midget
    Mad Monarch
    mad king
    Mad Hatter Miscavige
    Machiavellian Midget
    Louche Douche
    Lord Thumbscrew
    Lord of the Clams
    Lord of Darkness
    Lord High Clam
    Littlest Miscavenger
    Littlest Führer
    Littlest Caligula 
    Little Tator Tot the Dicktator
    Little Shit
    Little One
    Little Nero
    Little Napoleon
    Little Miz Bitch
    Little Lord Fontelroy
    Little Hitler
    little furry Enemy
    Little Fucker
    Little ferret
    Little Duck Dick
    Little Divot
    Little Dirk Digger
    little Dick Turd
    Little Dick
    Little Davy Square Pants
    Little Davey Blue
    Little Captain
    Little Caesar
    Little Butcher
    Little Bottom
    Little Boots
    Little Bitch
    Little Big Man
    limpdick, who can’t get it up
    Lilliputian Lunatic
    Lilliputian dingdong
    Lil’ Davey the Mythomaniac
    Lil’ Ronnie Humptypants
    Lil’ Pope
    Lil’ Leader
    Lil’ Davey Limpdick
    Lil’ Davey
    lil slap crazy pope
    Lil Kim Jong Deuce
    lil fuhrer
    Lil FiveOne: a psycho
    Lil FiveOne (feet & inches)
    Lil Demon Dave
    lil Captain
    Legal Lilliputian
    leatherfaced midget
    Le Nain Mortelle (The Deadly Dwarf)
    LCon’s bootboy
    Lafayette’s Baby
    Lafayette Ronnie
    Lady Davina Miscavige
    L’ill Douche
    Knee-High Nazi
    Knavey Davey
    King of the underoos
    King of Footbullets
    King Klown
    King cultroach
    King Clam
    Kim Jong Mustravage
    Itty Bitty Davy
    Invisible Toxic Midget
    In Trouble In Texas
    Imam of indecency…
    Il Douche
    Igor to “Dr” L. Ron Crankenstein
    Homunculus Horribilis
    Homunculous Novis
    Hollow Heels
    his wanna-be holiness
    His Unholiness
    His Tiny Popinessess
    His tininess
    His Soil-y-ness
    His Smarminess
    His Smallness
    His Skantastic Majesty
    His Skanktannic Majesty
    His Satanic Pantwetting Majesty
    his royal lowness
    His Royal Asshole (HRA)
    His Oiliness
    His Most Oleaginous Highness, Little Lord Fontelroy
    His Most Oleaginous Highness
    His Minusculeness
    His Miniature Excellency
    His Midgetsy
    His Midgetness
    His Inane Ignorance
    His Imperial Teensyness
    His Imperial Oiliness
    His Holeyness
    His Highnessless
    His Ecsleaziastical Eminence
    His Dmness
    His Claminess
    His Assholiness
    His Asshole-iness
    His Ass-Holiness, the Dwope (dwarf + pope) of Spyingtology
    Helmet Hair
    He Who We Love To Name
    He Who Should Probably Wear Lifts
    He Who Rants About Semicolons
    He Who Must Be Shamed
    He Who Must Be Blamed
    He Who Adds Misplaced Commas
    Hard Face
    gravy Davy
    Grand Pope
    Grand Poop
    Grand Poohbah and Ecclesiastical Scammaster
    Grand Exalted Mollusk Monarch
    Grand Ecclesiatical Leader
    God-Emperor of Hemet
    Ghenghis McSavage
    Future Jailbird
    Furry Fists of Fury
    Furious Midget
    Furious Homunculus
    Fucking Megalomaniac
    Fuck Face
    Former Mighty Mouse Miscavige
    Fork Tongue
    Flying monkey
    Fluffy Little Tail
    Fleet Enema
    Fleet Admiral MissCabin
    Fleet Admiral MissCabin
    Fights-Like-A-Weak-Girly-Then-Runs-Away **
    Ferret on Steroids
    Fearless Leader
    Fearful Leader With Ten Little Piggy Toes
    Fake Humanitarian.
    Evil overload
    Evil Midget Troll
    Evil Midget
    Evil Genius
    esleaziastical leader
    Eric Cartman (ref: South Park)
    Enrique Entheta (family nickname!)
    Emperor Slappamus Ultravox
    Emperor Clampatine, His most Minuscule
    El Dwarfo
    El Davito
    Ecsleazeiastical Leader
    eccsleazeiastical leader
    Ecclesiastical Midget.
    ecclesiastical midget
    Ecclesiastical Dildo
    Ecchlesiastical Leader (as MAD magazine would put it)
    Earl of thetandicks
    Dyspeptic Misanthrope
    Dysfunctional Minotaur
    dwergen fuehrer (dwergen = dwarves)
    Dwarfish Munchkin
    Dwarfish Malignancy
    Dwarf Vader
    Dwarf Midget
    Dwarf Megalo-man(iac)
    Dwarf Master
    Dwarf Maggot
    Durwood McDumbdick
    Duplicitous Morbidite
    Dungpuncher Douchebag
    Dung Master
    Dung Magnet
    Duncecap Dave
    Dummy Midget
    Dumbass Moocher
    Dumbass Mischling
    Dumb Midget
    Dumb Makemerich
    Dullard Microbrain
    Duke of Oil
    Dufus Maximus
    Dubious Mustard
    Dubious Microbe
    Dubious Master
    Drunken Malefactor
    Drunken Maggot
    Drunken Cult Operating Pimp (DCOP)
    Droitless Mischief
    Drivel McMidget
    Drip Mustrage
    Dribbling Micturant
    Dribbling Dwarf
    Dribbler MisTinkle
    Dreadful Mismanager
    Dracula Miscavige
    Draconian Midget
    Downtrodden Mealyworm
    Douchecanoe Malificent
    Douchebag Dave
    Douche Micro
    Douche Meister
    Douche Baggins
    Dopey Midget
    Doomed Malefactor
    Doofus Mustard-itch
    Doofus Minorus
    Doober McStooge
    Dolt Mismanage
    Dodgy Micromanager
    Dodgy Dave
    Do Lie Lama
    DM Dude
    DM Dud
    Dizzard Malicious
    Divot Mindscavenge
    Divot Mashedcabbage
    Diva of Misery
    Diva Misscabiatch
    Diva Manchild
    Ditzy Masochist
    Disturbing Midshipman
    Distracted Malignant
    Distinguished Moron
    Distant Mutton
    Dissolute Mook
    Discreditable Munchkin
    Disconnection Dickie
    Discivil Meanness
    Disappointed Menace
    Disappointed Maus
    Disadvantage Miscavige
    Dirty Mud-spatter
    Dirty Mistake
    Dirty Mismanage
    Dirty MicroPope
    Dirtbag Mudfuck
    Dirtbag Misogynist 
    Dirtbag Dave
    Dirt Magnet
    Director of Mesothelioma
    Dire Malcontent
    Dipsy Misdriven
    Dipstick Mucilage.
    DipsoManiacal Crock O’ Bullshit
    Dip Mudkip
    Dip Maldrip
    Dinky Monster
    Dinky Miss
    Dinky Mismanage
    Dinky Misconduct
    Dinky Miscavige
    Dinky Mindfuck
    Dinky Midget
    Dinky Member
    Dinky McSlappage
    Dinky McSavage
    Dinky Mayor
    Dinky Man
    Dinky Makemerich
    Dinkus Magee
    Dink Marauder
    Dingleberry Miscrapedhispants
    Dingleberry Meathead
    Dinglebat Mi$cavige
    Dimwitus Maximus
    Dimwit Munchkin
    Dimwit Midget
    Dimwit Dwarf
    dimwit Davy
    Dimunitive Miss
    Dimunitive Dimwit
    Dimtard Mass-suckage
    Dimly Munchkin
    Dimly Lit Dung Beetle
    diminutive sociopathic tyrant
    Diminutive Mouse
    Diminutive miscreant
    Diminutive Master
    Diminutive Manchild
    Diminutive Leader
    Diminutive Dwarf,
    diminutive Director
    diminutive dictator
    Diminunitive Psychopath
    Diminishing Microweenie
    Diminished Misfit
    Diminished Mapother
    Dimbulb Miscalculation
    Dillnozzle McScroteless
    Dildo Missionary
    Dildo Mcruntage
    Dildo Mcmidget
    Dildo Master
    Dildo Davey
    Dildo Dave
    Dildo Blackheart
    Diddy Davykins
    Diddy Dave
    Diddly Micromanager
    DictatorALot (like SpamALot)
    Dictator Midget
    Dickus Minimus
    Dickus Microscopis
    Dickless Misogynist
    Dickless midget
    Dickless Manchild
    Dickbag Miscavige
    dick tater
    Dick on a Box
    Dick Microscopic.
    Diarrheal Movement
    Diabolical Davey
    diabetes mellitus (a horrible disease)
    Devoid Maravigghia (Sicilian, without wonder)
    Devious Midget
    Devious Master
    Devil’s Miscarriage
    Devil’s Douchebag
    Devil Masquerading
    Destiny’s Midget
    Despotic Madman
    Despotic Dwarf
    Despoiler of Childhood
    Despicable Misanthrope
    Despicable MiniMe
    Despicable Midget
    Despicable Me
    Derp Missmatchmidge
    Deranged Demented Degraded Dave Rabid Savage Miscavage
    der shrimpenheimer
    Der MiniFuehrer
    Der Midget
    Der Massengil
    Der Manchild
    Der Leader
    Der Kleinegrupenfuhreur (Der Kleine Gruppenführer)
    Der Kleine Hitler
    Der Dwarfenfuehrer
    Deposed Megalomaniac
    Dense Midget
    Denied Mandamus
    Demonstrable Moron
    Demonically Motivated
    Demonic Monster
    Demon Mortis
    Demon Midget
    Demon Micro-Manager
    demented protege
    Demented Midget
    demented maggot
    Delusional Miscreant
    Delusional Meglomaniac
    Delusional Madman
    Delusional Davey
    Deluded Mouse
    Deluded McSavage
    Delirious Megalomaniac
    Delirious Macrologist
    Delightful Mud-fucker
    Degraded Demented Deluded Deranged Dave Savage Miscavage
    Defendant Moron
    Defendant Midget
    Defendant Micropeen
    Decomposing Meat
    Deceitful Masturbator
    Death Midge
    dear misleader
    dear misleader
    Dear Leader (Likening him to the current leader of North Korea)
    Deadly Dwarf
    Dead Meat
    Davy Wavy Gravy
    Davy Peabrain
    Davy Moppet
    Davy MisSasquatch
    Davy Dwarfenführer
    Davy Dipshit
    Davy Dinkyfuhrer
    Davy Bones
    Davos Mustravage, the evil child-catcher
    Davie Muffcabbage
    Davie Miscabies
    David the Mousehearted
    David the Faux Goliath
    David The Dwarf
    David Slapabitch
    David Savage Miscavige
    David Napoleon Miscavige
    David MissDickswallow
    David Misscock
    David Misreallyisansob
    David Mismanagement
    David MisMaggot
    David Misfit
    david miselvis
    David Miscshit-rash
    David Miscrab-itch 
    David Miscmidget
    David Misclampage
    David Miscariage-of-Justice
    David Miscalculation
    DAvid Mis-Boondoggle
    David Minisculavige
    David Midget
    David Mi$cavige
    David MESTcabbage
    David MaskaBitch
    David Makemerich
    David Macsavage
    David De Fib
    David Abortion
    David “Two Tents” Miscavige
    David “he is NOT insane!” Miscavige
    Davey, The Little Caterpillar That Couldn’t
    Davey Threeballs (extra testosterone for staff assault)
    Davey the Liquidator
    Davey the Douche
    Davey the Ball-less Wonder
    Davey Scurvey-Dick**
    Davey of the Fake Navy
    Davey Mystic Miscavage
    Davey Moron
    Davey Moppet
    Davey Misbitch
    Davey Minidick
    Davey Micromanage
    Davey McTard
    Davey McMansion
    Davey McCraycray
    Davey MasCara
    Davey Makemerich
    Davey Little Cockett
    Davey Little Caesar Miscavig
    Davey GatBoy II
    Davey Dimwit
    Davey Death Eater
    Davey Boy
    Dave, the whimp-ass-abuser, Miscavige
    Dave Savage Miscavige
    Dave Mismanagement Miscavige
    Dave Miskiewicz
    Dave Misbegotten
    Dave Cracksavige
    Dastardly Mindfucker
    Dastardly Malicious
    Dastardly Davey
    Dastardly Dave
    Das Midget
    Das Messiah
    Darth Munchkin
    Darth Midget 
    Darkly Mistaken
    Dark Muppet
    dark midget
    Dark Menace
    Dark Lord
    Dark Helmet
    Dank Muppet
    Dangly Mousdroppings
    Dangling Modifier
    Danger Midget
    dancing malignancy
    Damsel Miscavige
    Damp Merkin
    Damned Misconception Miscavige
    Damn Miscreant
    Damien MissRuntRage
    Damian Meanman
    Damaged Mistletoe
    Damage Mismanage
    Dainty Scabbybitch
    Dainty Mouse
    Dainty Monarch
    Dainty Miss
    Dainty MiniPope
    Dainty Maniac
    Dainty Maize
    Dainty Dave
    Dai Scwatbotwm*
    Daft Monk
    Daft Misfit
    Daft Midget
    Daft Massingill
    Daft Davy
    Daffy Misfit
    Daffy Davey Mustravage
    Daddy’s Mistake
    Curretted Own Bollocks
    Creepy Dave
    Coward of Brainwashville
    Court Ducker
    Corrupt Obtuse Blasphemer
    Corrector General of Tubby Hubby
    Corn on the COB Miscavage
    Corn in the COB
    Convict No. OTVIII
    Constipated Old Bollix
    Con Master
    Colonel Mustard
    clown pope
    Clam King
    Clam Calamity
    Chunky nuts
    Chunky Head
    chunk head
    Chuckles the Silly Piggy
    Chief Bug Squasher
    Chicken Of the Board
    Chef Miscavige
    Chastiser of Bivalves
    Chastiser of Bivalves
    Chairmonkey of the Board
    Chairmidget of the Bored
    ChairMao Of the Bored
    Chairman of the Whores
    Chairman of the Bored Miscavage
    Chairman Mousecavige
    Chairman Mousecage
    Chairman Miscavige
    Chairman Maocavige
    Chairman Mao Miscavige
    Chairman Chingadera (chairman motherfucker)
    Cardinal Sin
    Captain Underoos
    Captain Tiny
    Captain Sixty-One (height in inches)
    Captain Shortypants
    Captain Scary Shitface
    Captain Puppeteer
    Captain Pretentious
    Captain Pope
    Captain Pissgums**
    Captain Piece of Shit
    Captain Pain
    Captain One Five Five (Centimeters)
    Captain niblet (see niblet)
    Captain Misslappy
    Captain MissedtheBoat
    Captain Miss Scavenge
    Captain Miskiewicz
    Captain Mischiefitch
    Captain Mini-stabby
    Captain McCabbage
    Captain Lilliput
    captain fucktard
    Captain Five One (feet and inches)
    Captain Douchenozzle Mcsucknuts
    Captain Douchebag Dave
    Captain Dildo Dave
    Captain Dickwad
    CAPTAIN Decomposing Meat
    Captain Death March
    Captain David “he is NOT insane!” Miscavige
    Captain Dastardly Motherf***er
    Captain Crook
    Captain Clamo
    Captain Clam
    Captain Brazen Lair Pants on Fire
    Captain Blackheart, SS Division
    Captain Blackheart McSlavich
    Captain Blackheart
    Captain Baby Blackheart
    Capt. Miscadick
    Capo di tutti capi of all of Scientology’s tentacles
    Cancerous gnome
    Cabbage head
    C5-1 (Captain + height in ft & inches)
    Bubba’s Ass Bitch
    Boss Miscarriage
    Bog Dave Miscavige
    blow chunks
    Blackheart Most Devious
    Blackheart Dildo
    Blackberry Pope
    Black-Hearted Squirrel Smasher
    Black Heart MFCS
    blab hearted midget
    bitty boots
    Bishop of bullshit…
    Bishop of Baloney
    Billion Year Asshole
    biggest thetan in the universe
    Biggest Squirrell in the Gal-UX-ah
    biggest little thetan
    Big Top Slappy
    Big Thetan
    Big lil One
    Big Flea
    Big Burrito
    Big Being
    Big Bean 2
    Big Bean
    Bally Llama
    Bag Of Crap Chairman Of the Board: BOCCOB
    Babycorn COB
    Asthmatic Dwarf
    Ass Captain
    Area 51 (height in ft.& inches)
    Apolocalyptic Dave
    Ankle Biter
    Angry Shrimp
    Angry Homunculus
    Angry Elf
    Admiral Assclown
    Abbot of Anger
    A person of dubious height
    A most Heinous & Hyddeous (withal Minute) Villain**
    (dic)tator tot
    (*) (it’s supposed to look like a poodle’s …ermm… “kibble exit”).

    *From a small Welsh tribe of idiots who sailed to Pagagonia in stone boats.
    i was just musing on variants of Shortarse… and Dai Squatbottom (wishful thinking for die, squatbottom!) and his stone boat sprang into horrid being.
    “Dai” is the short familiar version (like “Lew” for Llewellyn or “Glyn” for Glyndwr/Glendower).
    “Scwatbotwm” is probably how you’d spell Squatbottom in Welsh orthography

    **From a poster for a mythical pirate, Captain Blackheart posted by Mark

  • Timber56

    Emily Armstrong is an openly gay scientologist. And Laura Prepon has said:
    “It’s just so funny that, when people don’t know, they just make stuff up, [like] apparently I’m dating Tom Cruise right now. And apparently he doesn’t want me doing the show because I portray a lesbian and I’m a Scientologist. This is false; where are they even getting this stuff? It’s unbelievable to me.” “The thing that sucks is that there’s so much false data because people are in mystery as to what Scientology is, so they just kind of make up stuff.”
    ”I’m a supporter of the gay and lesbian community. I have friends who are lesbian, I have friends who are gay. It’s all about the character. Yes there are a lot of lesbians on this show. Besides the L Word there aren’t lesbians portrayed like this on television … There is a big gay and lesbian community out there and it’s good to have more relationships on television that they can relate to and I’m glad we could be a part of that.”