Easter Sunday Funnies: David Miscavige has risen, & Scientology has more money than ever!

Hey kids, happy Easter Sunday! We have a selection of treats for you to hunt down this morning, and we’re starting off with another surprising tax document that shows the astounding wealth of the Church of Scientology!

Jeffrey Augustine has been helping us find these gems, and he tells us this one is hot off the presses — it’s the 2012 return by the Church of Scientology International, the mother church as it were. This is again a 990-T form, which reflects “unrelated business income” that since 2006 even churches have been required to submit if they’re taking in money unrelated to their main purpose. We’re less interested in the relatively small amounts of revenue listed on these documents than we are a single figure that appears on the first page — the entity’s “book value.” This is an estimate based on CSI’s total assets, including real estate.

And for 2012, it’s a seriously big number: $846,314,618

We can now see that CSI (which is only one of many Scientology entities) has been growing in leaps and bounds in recent years. Here’s a breakdown of recent 990-T returns:

2008 $612,684,413
2009 $730,132,600

Heck, we’d bet that once Lynn Farny turns in CSI’s 2013 tax return later this year, it’s going to be awfully close to a billion dollars in book value all by itself!

2012 Church of Scientology International 990-T

 
Now, please keep in mind that this $800 million in value reflects only CSI, which is just one of many entities that make up Scientology — and some of most lucrative entities (RTC, ASI, IASA, etc.) don’t seem to file 990-T forms at all. Based on that, we really don’t think it’s unreasonable to assume that Scientology is worth six or seven billions dollars — former executive Debbie Cook estimated that there was more than a billion just in the liquid assets of the International Association of Scientologists (IAS), the legal defense slush fund which leader David Miscavige taps into for litigation and public relations.

And yet, with those mountains of cash, do you think Scientology is going to let up on its aggressive fundraising, even for a minute?

Heck no! There’s a new exhibition hall to build in Clearwater, for example, and those buildings don’t pay for themselves! One of our tipsters forwarded us an e-mail and some photos which showed how creative the fundraising is getting. If you’re going to fleece the whales, after all, you need to make them feel special. Especially when one of those whales is Trish Duggan, wife of billionaire businessman Bob Duggan, and the biggest donors in all of Scientology. We estimate they’ve given more than $40 million to the church in recent years, so little wonder that she was treated like the rock star that she is! Check out the e-mail from Bruce Roger to get a sense of it…

> Date: Wed, 16 Apr 2014 10:24:01 -0800 (PDT)
> From: Bruce Roger
> To:
> Subject: Explorers Club Awards Dinner!

Dear Xxxxxx,

I just returned back to Flag after a fantastic weekend in New York City where we just held our 1st L. Ron Hubbard Hall Awards Dinner & Event at the world renown Explorer’s Club.

In attendance were some of Scientology’s very own most notable and famous personalities. Beings that became famous for foraging a path to the release of LRH’s miraculous technology of Super Power by making possible the construction of our new Cathedral in downtown Clearwater.

Such famous names in attendance were Duggan, Baybak and Pollack just to name a few.

See my attached photos!

The evening began with a tour of the Explorer’s Club conducted by none other than the Executive Director of the Explorer’s Club himself, Mr. Will Roseman and while he stated “Ladies and gentleman though you have had the privilege and honor of studying Dianetics and Scientology, I would like to point out to you that it is right here where Scientology all began!! Right here at the Explorer’s Club!”

Mr. Will Roseman then proceeded to show us the EXACT table where LRH sat and wrote the words of an article entitled “Terra Incognita”.

In this article LRH takes you on the most daring adventure into the mystery of the Mind.

Mr. Will Roseman then explained that It was the Explorer’s Club that first published Terra Incognita to the public and thus paved the way for LRH’s next publication – Dianetics!

The evening was studded with personal LRH stories of his miraculous accomplishments and culminated with an awards presentation from the In-Charge of the Church Of Scientology Religious Trust, Mr Lauri Webster, whereby she described the role and importance of the L. Ron Hubbard Hall and the need to bring it into rapid existence so that we can use the L Ron Hubbard Hall to create the next leap forward in Scientology’s next phase of monumental expansion!!

All in attendance dedicated themselves to the purpose of bringing the L Ron Hubbard Hall into existence.

And now in a new unit of time I ask you as a highly dedicated supporter of the past Super Power Project to re-dedicate your commitment and efforts to making this a better World and become a L Ron Hubbard Hall contributor.

Our new game is for each of our 2,700 Cornerstone Members to become L. Ron Hubbard Hall Members with a gift of 25,000, so as to accomplish the full funding for the L. Ron Hubbard Hall. As COB stated when he saluted the Cornerstone Members at their Gala Ball, during the week of the opening; “Thank you for galvanizing a movement and so bringing the power of thousands to bear for the benefit of eternity itself.”

So as you can see it is this galvanized team that we are counting on to get the job done, I am therefore asking you to rapidly complete your L. Ron Hubbard Hall status and join the ranks of all those who have already lead the way in the creation of the L. Ron Hubbard Hall.

I await your reply.

Much love,

Bruce

 
Twenty-five new people on Student Hat! This planet will be cleared in no time!

 
Well, David Love isn’t going to like this. It looks like Scientology’s drug rehab network, Narconon, is trying to make a comeback in the UK…

 
Hey, look who were the guests of honor in Miami! Our favorite couple, Grant and Elena Cardone!

 
As Mike Rinder pointed out the other day, this is really remarkable. For the first time in memory, the big Dianetics Day celebration (Dianetics, the book that started it all, was published May 9, 1950), won’t take place at the Shrine Auditorium but will instead be held on L. Ron Hubbard Way in Los Angeles — another sign that Scientology can’t attract the numbers they need as the organization dwindles fast.

 
Thanks again to our great tipsters!

 
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Kate Bornstein needs your help

We’re posting the recent appeal by Barbara Carrellas, partner to Kate Bornstein, a person who is very important to the Underground Bunker community. Please give it a read and consider helping out.

Hello friends and family,

This is Barbara, Kate Bornstein’s partner in life, love and art. I’m writing to ask—once again—for your help.

As many of you know, Kate’s lung cancer is back. It reappeared in late December in a lymph node behind her collarbone. The good news is that it did not travel far from its original site. Recent scans show it’s not in her brain or bones. The further good news is that it did not reappear anywhere that had been previously treated with radiation and chemotherapy. This means that the doctors can treat this new tumor aggressively and the treatment is likely to work. We have been assured that this cancer is still curable.

The bad news is that the treatment for this second round is way more intense than the last. (And we thought that round was challenging!) This means that in addition to more intense chemo and radiation, she needs more supplements and alternative therapies to keep her fighting. She’s much weaker with this new treatment and needs to spend more on transportation to and from treatments. She has a hard time doing basic tasks, like preparing food for herself and the pets. Even getting dressed to go to chemo/radiation treatments is a challenge. Small tasks are not just physically, but also emotionally, overwhelming. This “brain fog” and the accompanying extreme energy drain are common, yet hideous side effects of the treatment. Worse yet, these effects will continue for months after treatment has stopped. This means we have no idea when she can return to work.

We are deeply grateful for your astoundingly generous donations of over $100,000 last year. It’s the support of her community—and we mean emotional, physical, and psychic support, as well as financial—that helps Kate #StayAlive. We still have a bit of that $100,000 left and we are stretching it as far as it can possibly go. (Let me take a moment to thank the people who are currently providing their services and products at reduced cost.) But Kate is going to run out of money very soon.

In short, if Kate is going to #StayAlive, she needs the financial support of her community once again. Kate wants me to be sure to tell you how hard it is to ask for this kind of support. She knows many of you have financial challenges of your own. Please give only if and what you can afford. All of the money raised goes directly towards Kate’s treatment.

Here’s the PayPal link to donate: http://bit.ly/1pkRV4K

Whether or not you can donate, you can help Kate #StayAlive by letting others know how they can help. Please forward/post/distribute this message widely. For inquiries and/or offers of help, write to KateStayAlive(at) gmail (dot) com.

And just so you know, Kate is truly appreciative of all the supportive tweets and other messages she’s been receiving. Please understand that although it’s hard for her to respond to all of them, they mean the world to her.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Love,

Barbara Carrellas
& Team Kate

 
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Posted by Tony Ortega on April 20, 2014 at 08:00

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Learn about Scientology with our numerous series with experts…

BLOGGING DIANETICS (We read Scientology’s founding text) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25

UP THE BRIDGE (Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43

GETTING OUR ETHICS IN (Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14

SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING (Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43

PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | Scientology’s Private Dancer