The world is on fire, but Scientology is here to make everything OK!

 
TODAY AT SUBSTACK: If you’ve signed up for free emails at Substack, you will receive today’s feature story at your inbox: The news coming at us is pretty distressing, but at least we can take a brief break from the latest apocalypse to enjoy just how ridiculous the Church of Scientology is as it prepares this planet for the triumphant return of science fiction giant L. Ron Hubbard! [What is this Substack thing, anyway?]

 
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Technology Cocktail

“recently made an important technical discovery that a person, org or area can be totally bogged by a mis-cram or by an R/Ser operating under the guise of a ‘Cramming Officer.’ In the particular instance, one R/Sing Cramming Officer had bogged an org and then a second R/Sing Cramming Officer took over to ‘repair it,’ resulting in a nearly total crash. It has been found that faulty, quickie or mis-cramming can result in continual goofs or an apparency of out-ethics as the person isn’t correcting. This list covers the basic errors that can occur in cramming. It has also been found that a Cramming Officer who has consistent overt products will mess up an area. This list is used to correct such cramming.” — L. Ron Hubbard, 1978

 
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THE PROSECUTION OF DANNY MASTERSON

We first broke the news of the LAPD’s investigation of Scientology celebrity Danny Masterson on rape allegations in 2017, and we’ve been covering the story every step of the way since then. At this page we’ve collected our most important links as Danny faces a potential sentence of 45 years to life in prison. NOW WITH TRIAL INDEX.

 
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THE PODCAST: How many have you heard?

[1] Marc Headley [2] Claire Headley [3] Jeffrey Augustine [4] Bruce Hines [5] Sunny Pereira [6] Pete Griffiths [7] Geoff Levin [8] Patty Moher [9] Marc Headley [10] Jefferson Hawkins [11] Michelle ‘Emma’ Ryan [12] Paulette Cooper [13] Jesse Prince [14] Mark Bunker [15] Jon Atack [16] Mirriam Francis [17] Bruce Hines on MSH

— SPECIAL: The best TV show on Scientology you never got to see

[1] Phil Jones [2] Derek Bloch [3] Carol Nyburg [4] Katrina Reyes [5] Jamie DeWolf

— The first Danny Masterson trial and beyond

[18] Trial special with Chris Shelton [19] Trial week one [20] Marc Headley on the spy in the hallway [21] Trial week two [22] Trial week three [23] Trial week four [24] Leah Remini on LAPD Corruption [25] Mike Rinder 2022 Thanksgiving Special [26] Jane Doe 4 (Tricia Vessey), Part One [27] Jane Doe 4 (Tricia Vessey), Part Two [28] Claire Headley on the trial [29] Tory Christman [30] Bruce Hines on spying [31] Karen de la Carriere [32] Ron Miscavige on Shelly Miscavige [33] Karen de la Carriere on the L’s [34] Mark Bunker on Miscavige hiding [35] Mark Plummer [36] Mark Ebner [37] Karen Pressley [38] Steve Cannane [39] Fredrick Brennan [40] Clarissa Adams [41] Louise Shekter [42] John Sweeney [43] Tory Christman [44] Kate Bornstein [45] Christian Stolte [46] Mark Bunker [47] Jon Atack [48] Luke Y. Thompson [49] Mark Ebner [50] Bruce Hines [51] Spanky Taylor and Karen Pressley [51] Geoff and Robbie Levin [52] Sands Hall [53] Jonny Jacobsen [54] Sandy Holeman [55] Mark Bunker [56] Trish and Liz Conley [57] Trish Conley [58] Alex Barnes-Ross [59] Alex Barnes-Ross [60] Alex Barnes-Ross [61] Alex Barnes-Ross [62] Alex Barnes-Ross [63] Alex Barnes-Ross [64] Tory Christman [65] Tammy Synovec [66] Dennis Erlich [67] Alex Barnes-Ross [68] Valerie Ross [69] Kat in Austin [70] Mark Bunker [71] Phil Jones

 
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Source Code

“It’s a long story. But in 1950, a fellow name of Palmer walked into the Explorers Club just as I was leaving the mail room, and Palmer says to me, ‘Hey, Ron, you want an expedition?’ And I said, ‘Well, sure.’ ‘Well, he says, ‘there’s a whole bunch of Greek and Roman statuary that was being brought from Athens to Rome, and the ship went aground on the north side of the Dodecanese.’ And he says, ‘Been there ever since. And they’ve just located it at about thirty fathoms of water’….And I’ve just been sort of working on this in my spare time and getting it together. Nothing very dramatic in the way of progress….And just today, why, their delay was explained. They had already put it before the Flag Committee and the board of directors and that sort of thing. So the expedition, as of that action, became an official scientific expedition: ocean archaeological survey with the purpose of discovering various periods of marine history in the past, as possibly represented on the floors of sunken harbors long since passed from the view of man where there are, of course, still ships. And I don’t guarantee that we won’t stop by on some of the stuff sunk during World War II and pick up a few tommy guns.” — L. Ron Hubbard, June 22, 1961

 
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Avast, Ye Mateys

“FLAG RUMOURS: You should write all your friends to correct field impression of Flag with brutal ethics and cat-o-nine. I worked out what really happened. In Melilla in the Spring of ’68 we had a flood of raw, relatively untrained, unaudited people arrive. We also had five people who were very heavy handed and suppressive, since blown or dismissed (Berez was booted out of the SO for drug use and is in jail for drug running and possibly Taunton). The ship during the VIII Class was (a) poorly manned (b) had SPs aboard and (c) had very few trained Scientologists and (d) was under heavy enemy attack (the Greek affair with bird dogs aboard). (The UK ban.) What happened was, we trained and processed up the crew, we opened the gate on the SPs and dumped them, we made quite a few auditors and beat the enemy attack with excellent PRO Area Control and the ‘dead agent’ caper, meaning getting documentary proof that what was said of us was lies and getting the agents booted out of the country.” — The Commodore, June 22, 1970

 
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Overheard in the FreeZone

“Lao Tsu, The Buddha, Jesus, Moses, Ron, all had their flaws, all had their writings altered, all had some of it used for evil purposes, and all were bashed at some time. But they all had many things of value. You can spend an entire lifetime pointing out errors in all of them. But that is just plain stupid. It gets you and me nowhere. Most people who bash real Scientology over and over daily are really very lazy, not going to the trouble to find out what is true. A few have been harmed by pseudo Scientologists and now can’t tell the difference. Some have been fed false data or nothing but the bad actual data and their opinion is cemented. A few are just dumb asses who can’t tell the difference in steak and shit on a shingle. There is a lot of truth out there. Don’t dwell on the errors. Find some truths that work for you and others and put out some G** Damn effort in using it. Get your face out of the computer, get your hand off your privates, get out of the closet, get out there and DO something. It’s not really that hard.”

Past is Prologue

2001: LA Weekly published an article on Keith Henson, a refugee in Canada after being convicted in California of interfering with the Scientology religion. “Henson, a Palo Alto computer consultant, was in custody at the ‘super-maximum-security’ Metro West Detention Centre on a Canadian immigration warrant. The warrant was based on Henson’s April 26 criminal conviction in Hemet, California. Henson was found guilty of a single misdemeanor count of interfering with a religion. To those familiar with a ferocious five-year war between the church and its Internet critics, it comes as no surprise that the religion was Scientology. Earlier this month, Henson was freed, pending a hearing on his application for political asylum in Canada. Henson, who says he did no more than post nasty Usenet messages and picket Scientology locations, claims the church set him up. The case is likely to raise questions of how far a religion can go to protect itself from dissidents, and of free speech on the Net. Skeptics have long congregated on alt.religion.scientology (ARS), a lively but not exactly headline-grabbing Usenet group. In 1995, Scientology tried to shut the site down. The retrospectively ill-advised attempt was followed by denial-of-service and ‘sporging’ (forgery and spoofing) attacks, which raised the hackles of the hardcore Net community. A new generation of anti-Scientology activists was born. Alt.religion.scientology now is one of the most popular Usenet groups. ‘Scientology’s action had the psychological effect you would have seen of a gang of thugs riding into a Midwestern town and burning down the newspapers,’ Henson said. Henson began picketing Scientology facilities nationwide, including the church’s film-production compound outside Hemet. The razor-wire-enclosed spread, called Golden Era Productions, occupies 500 acres along Gilman Hot Springs Road. Critics claim the compound also houses the church’s highly secretive security apparatus. Many of the 700 Scientologists who work at Golden Era are bused in from apartment complexes in Hemet, dressed in blue seafaring uniforms. One of his postings was a suggestion to land a ‘Cruise missile’ on Gold Base; another said of Scientology, ‘destroy it utterly.’ Henson says the messages were inside jokes: ‘Cruise’ referred to actor Tom Cruise, a longtime Scientologist, and the ‘destruction’ quote was a takeoff on one of L. Ron’s own incendiary statements. Golden Era general manager Ken Hoden says Henson’s bomb postings were taken seriously. ‘Based on evidence we were able to collect off the Internet, his intention was to destroy [the production facility] utterly, to leave not one stone unturned,’ Hoden said. After a disastrous non-defense defense – Henson and supporters say Riverside County Superior Court Judge Robert Wallerstein gutted their case – the jury hung on two counts, but convicted Henson of the interfering charge, which is classified as a hate crime. Facing a recommended 200 days in Riverside County Jail, which Henson feared had been infiltrated by the Scientologists’ Criminon rehab program, the defendant fled before his sentencing date to Toronto, where he and Hagglund, a Canadian Scientology foe, picketed a downtown Scientology office. The church complained, bringing out the SWAT team. Henson blames his prosecution on a Scientology doctrine called ‘fair game.’ In 1967, Hubbard announced that any suppressive person (Scientology jargon for ‘enemy’) ‘may be deprived of property or injured by any means, by any Scientologist. He may be tricked, sued or lied to, or destroyed.’ Frank Oliver of Florida, flew in to testify on Henson’s behalf, but the judge refused to let him take the stand. Oliver told New Times Los Angeles his Scientology duties: ‘Spy on people. Gather intelligence. Write reports.’ Henson’s asylum application could take nine months to two years to resolve. In the meantime, he plans to be back on the picket line soon, despite a Canadian order to keep away from the church.”

 
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Random Howdy

“The putrefaction shakedown is a more accurate name for it.”

 
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Full Court Press: What we’re watching at the Underground Bunker

Criminal prosecutions:
— Danny Masterson charged for raping three women: Found guilty on two counts on May 31, remanded to custody. Sentenced to 30 years to life on Sep 7, 2023. DA’s response to appeal brief due June 13.
— ‘Lafayette Ronald Hubbard’ (a/k/a Justin Craig), aggravated assault, plus drug charges: Grand jury indictments include charges from an assault while in custody. Next pretrial hearing June 16.
— David Gentile, GPB Capital, convicted of fraud. Sentenced to 7 years in prison.

Civil litigation:
— Leah Remini v. Scientology, alleging ‘Fair Game’ harassment and defamation: Some defamation claims were removed by Judge Hammock. Judge Hammock’s ruling is on appeal. Leah’s appeal brief due June 3.
— Baxter, Baxter, and Paris v. Scientology, alleging labor trafficking: Forced to arbitration.
— Valerie Haney v. Scientology: Forced to ‘religious arbitration.’
— Chrissie Bixler et al. v. Scientology and Danny Masterson. Judge Upindra Kalra’s ruling denying Scientology’s motion to strike is on appeal.
— Jane Doe 1 v. Scientology, David Miscavige, and Gavin Potter: Case unsealed and second amended complaint filed. Scientology moves for religious arbitration, gets ruling to depose Jane Doe 1. Trial has been set for January 10, 2028.

 
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SCIENTOLOGY: FAIR GAME

After the success of their double-Emmy-winning, three-season A&E series ‘Scientology and the Aftermath,’ Leah Remini and Mike Rinder continue the conversation on their podcast, ‘Scientology: Fair Game.’ We’ve created a landing page where you can hear all of the episodes so far.

LEAH REMINI: SCIENTOLOGY AND THE AFTERMATH

An episode-by-episode guide to Leah Remini’s three-season, double-Emmy winning series that changed everything for Scientology watching. Originally aired from 2016 to 2019 on the A&E network, and now on Netflix.

SCIENTOLOGY’S CELEBRITIES, from A to Z

Find your favorite Hubbardite celeb at this index page — or suggest someone to add to the list!

 
Other links: SCIENTOLOGY BLACK OPS: Tom Cruise and dirty tricks. Scientology’s Ideal Orgs, from one end of the planet to the other. Scientology’s sneaky front groups, spreading the good news about L. Ron Hubbard while pretending to benefit society. Scientology Lit: Books reviewed or excerpted in a weekly series. How many have you read?

 
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THE WHOLE TRACK

[ONE year ago] The bizarre Scientology ideas about death being dredged up in a heartbreaking lawsuit
[TWO years ago] Read Scientology spokesman Ben Shaw’s latest freakout over the Tampa Bay Times
[THREE years ago] Scientology fundraising is soaring to new heights! Scientology says so!
[FOUR years ago] Scientology miracles from its 1980s heyday: How do they compare to today?
[FIVE years ago] Scientology donor’s financial firm hit with new charges of securities violations
[SIX years ago] How Scientology is likely going to come back at the explosive new lawsuits
[SEVEN years ago] Why we think nutty Las Vegas councilwoman Michele Fiore might be a Scientologist
[EIGHT years ago] HOWDYCON 2017 IS HERE — DENVER IS CLEAR!
[NINE years ago] CLEARWATER DONE DEAL — Couple seeks big crowd for Scientology ‘disconnection’ billboard
[TEN years ago] LIVE-BLOGGING: The Toronto conference on Scientology kicks off and we’re on the scene
[ELEVEN years ago] Sunday Funnies: The desperation in Scientology fliers is getting worse. Much worse.
[TWELVE years ago] Meet the Man Behind WWP, the Web Home of Anonymous and Project Chanology

 
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Posted by Tony Ortega on June 22, 2025 at 07:00

E-mail tips to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We also post updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our new book with Paulette Cooper, Battlefield Scientology: Exposing L. Ron Hubbard’s dangerous ‘religion’ is now on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats. Our book about Paulette, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2023 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Underground Bunker (2012-2023), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Other links: BLOGGING DIANETICS: Reading Scientology’s founding text cover to cover | UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists | GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice | SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts | Shelly Miscavige, 15 years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Watch our short videos that explain Scientology’s controversies in three minutes or less…

Check your whale level at our dedicated page for status updates, or join us at the Underground Bunker’s Facebook discussion group for more frivolity.

Our non-Scientology stories: Robert Burnham Jr., the man who inscribed the universe | Notorious alt-right inspiration Kevin MacDonald and his theories about Jewish DNA | The selling of the “Phoenix Lights” | Astronomer Harlow Shapley‘s FBI file | Sex, spies, and local TV news | Battling Babe-Hounds: Ross Jeffries v. R. Don Steele

 

Tony Ortega at The Daily Beast

 

Tony Ortega at Rolling Stone