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Tom Cruise on InTouch cover: Another completely oversold Scientology clip job

For years we’ve pointed out the dishonest tabloid formula that gets used again and again in stories about Scientology: The publication promises a huge bombshell on the cover but when you turn to the story inside, it’s almost always just another clip job with breathless expressions of amazement about how incredible it would be if Tom Cruise left Scientology or reunited with Suri or whatever the MacGuffin is this time.

In this case, the delusion is that Tom has some regrets about Scientology and his breakups with Nicole Kidman and Katie Holmes, and wouldn’t it be awesome if he were to go public with it all?



Of course there is no “tell-all” from Cruise himself. In fact, the only quotes in the story from him are from decade-old articles in other publications.

The story begins by reminding us that Cruise hasn’t been seen in public with his daughter Suri since 2013, which is the real story, of course, and one that InTouch (before it was sold to the National Enquirer parent American Media in 2018) got sued for reporting at that time. Back then, it had some real reporters and actually cared about Scientology stories, but that’s apparently no longer the case.

In this story’s tired setup, an inside “source” claims that Tom is “opening up” about his regrets and is “considering” going public about it. Yeah, we’ll believe that when we see it.

And that’s it. The rest of the story is just a clip job about stuff that’s already been reported over and over, about his marriages to Kidman and Holmes, about having a new home in Clearwater, and that he’s close friends with Scientology leader David Miscavige.


If the Cruise story was warmed over nothing, at least there was this: A sidebar that mentioned Danny Masterson being sued, and another about Clearwater Police Chief Dan Slaughter making a visit to the Flag Land Base to make sure Scientology is abiding by social distancing rules. (Although we wouldn’t characterize that as a “raid,” as the magazine did.)

So, once again, Cruise is portrayed by a tabloid publication as regretting his involvement with Scientology or missing his daughter or missing his ex-wife or some other attempt to make him seem human and sympathetic. And it’s always based on an unnamed “source” whose quotes all sound made up.

Why not report the real story, which is a hell of a lot more interesting? That one of the wealthiest, most successful movie stars on the planet has chosen L. Ron Hubbard and David Miscavige over his own daughter, whom he has ditched for a totalitarian organization that splits up families like it was a sacrament?

InTouch doesn’t need invented unnamed sources to tell that story.



Scientology taking advantage of COVID-19, says journalist

Another really fine piece by Canadian journalist Gaétan Pouliot, this time quoting professor Stephen Kent and exposing Scientology’s highly questionable attempts to turn the coronavirus pandemic into a public relations campaign.

Here’s a great excerpt from it (translated by Google from the original French)…

To cope with the health crisis, the Church of Scientology also offers a free online course to help relieve the mental anxieties associated with isolation and the feeling of being overwhelmed .

A promotional video presents a scenario where a mysterious deadly virus, originating from mice, spreads quickly on the planet. “Dad, who’s going to die?” asks a little girl, looking worried.

According to this course, journalists, politicians and doctors are “chaos merchants,” responsible for many anxieties.

“A chaos merchant is someone who spreads bad news for his own benefit to make the environment seem much more dangerous than it actually is,” reads one of the online course chapters.

“Doctors are not paid for the number of people who are doing well. The more illness, the more doctors,” the document adds.


Source Code

“Well now look, Mary Sue has been working very, very hard to make an OT out of me and been working at it and working at it and she didn’t make the grade. I wanted to get OT today so I could give you some nice weather. And I just didn’t make it, I’m sorry. I only got thirteen banks back and got stuck, you know.” — L. Ron Hubbard, April 20, 1963



Overheard in the FreeZone

“We no longer need to address the problems in life via time and energy. We now have a thetan who no longer requires a via to give birth to a positive postulate; one moves forward simply postulating anew. A Scientological being is no longer part of the common denominator of existence: to survive. A higher harmonic, a higher level of ‘survive’ is to live in postulates. He is immortal and he knows it. If there is any time it is simply now. Now is when a true theta being exists continually. If one wants to change a current mockup, all one does is postulate the new mockup. We no longer need to look back into the past to resolve an unwanted condition.”


Random Howdy

“Human nature isn’t that complex. If you strip away the unnatural veneer of civilization, what are you left with? Spend some time on the street and tell me human nature is complex. Human egotism is infinite is more like it.”


Full Court Press: What we’re watching at the Underground Bunker

Criminal prosecutions:
Jay Spina: Sentencing was set for April 3 in White Plains
Hanan and Rizza Islam and other family members: Trial set for October 7 in Los Angeles

Civil litigation:
Luis and Rocio Garcia v. Scientology: Waiting for an appellate decision from the Eleventh Circuit
Valerie Haney v. Scientology: Forced to ‘religious arbitration.’ Hearing on motion for reconsideration set for June 17
Chrissie Bixler et al. v. Scientology and Danny Masterson: May 1 (Masterson new demurrer due), July 8 (plaintiff attorneys pro hac vice), August 31-Sept 1 (CSI/RTC demurrer against Riales, Masterson demurrer), Oct 7-19 (motions to compel arbitration)
Jane Doe v. Scientology (in Miami): Jane Doe’s attorneys have asked for discovery, depositions (Warren McShane, Lynn Farny), amended complaint filed
Matt and Kathy Feschbach bankruptcy appeal: Oral arguments were heard on March 11 in Jacksonville
Brian Statler Sr v. City of Inglewood: Amended complaint filed.


Scientology’s celebrities, ‘Ideal Orgs,’ and more!

[Alanna Masterson, Terry Jastrow, and Marisol Nichols]

We’ve been building landing pages about David Miscavige’s favorite playthings, including celebrities and ‘Ideal Orgs,’ and we’re hoping you’ll join in and help us gather as much information as we can about them. Head on over and help us with links and photos and comments.

Scientology’s celebrities, from A to Z! Find your favorite Hubbardite celeb at this index page — or suggest someone to add to the list!

Scientology’s ‘Ideal Orgs,’ from one end of the planet to the other! Help us build up pages about each these worldwide locations!

Scientology’s sneaky front groups, spreading the good news about L. Ron Hubbard while pretending to benefit society!

Scientology Lit: Books reviewed or excerpted in our weekly series. How many have you read?



[ONE year ago] Bull baiting and so much worse: Margery Wakefield on surviving Scientology
[TWO years ago] Joy Villa’s Scientologist husband shamed into dropping elephant skin bags from luxury line
[THREE years ago] As Clearwater votes, here’s a reminder of how L. Ron Hubbard had Scientology invade Florida
[FOUR years ago] Disconnection, Miscavige style: How Scientology’s most powerful family came apart
[FIVE years ago] AUDIO: Full police interviews of Scientology spies and their stalking of Ron Miscavige Sr.
[SIX years ago] Easter Sunday Funnies: David Miscavige has risen, & Scientology has more money than ever!
[SEVEN years ago] African Queen: The Man L. Ron Hubbard Thought He Was
[EIGHT years ago] David Edgar Love: “I Think I Have Scientology By The Balls”
[NINE years ago] When Scientologists Attack!


Scientology disconnection, a reminder

Bernie Headley (1952-2019) did not see his daughter Stephanie in his final 5,667 days.
Valerie Haney has not seen her mother Lynne in 1,913 days.
Katrina Reyes has not seen her mother Yelena in 2,417 days
Sylvia Wagner DeWall has not seen her brother Randy in 1,937 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his grandson Leo in 957 days.
Geoff Levin has not seen his son Collin and daughter Savannah in 848 days.
Christie Collbran has not seen her mother Liz King in 4,155 days.
Clarissa Adams has not seen her parents Walter and Irmin Huber in 2,023 days.
Carol Nyburg has not seen her daughter Nancy in 2,797 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 3,571 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 2,917 days.
Dylan Gill has not seen his father Russell in 11,483 days.
Melissa Paris has not seen her father Jean-Francois in 7,402 days.
Valeska Paris has not seen her brother Raphael in 3,570 days.
Mirriam Francis has not seen her brother Ben in 3,151 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 3,412 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 2,450 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica in 2,163 days.
Marie Bilheimer has not seen her mother June in 1,688 days.
Charley Updegrove has not seen his son Toby in 1,218 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 5,778 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 2,918 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 3,238 days.
Roger Weller has not seen his daughter Alyssa in 8,093 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 3,213 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 1,568 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin and daughter Taryn in 5,871 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 1,977 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis in 2,379 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 2,251 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 1,834 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike and daughter Emily in 2,329 days.
Mary Jane Barry has not seen her daughter Samantha in 2,583 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 13,692 days.


Posted by Tony Ortega on April 20, 2020 at 07:00

E-mail tips to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We also post updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our new book with Paulette Cooper, Battlefield Scientology: Exposing L. Ron Hubbard’s dangerous ‘religion’ is now on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats. Our book about Paulette, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2019 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Underground Bunker (2012-2019), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Other links: BLOGGING DIANETICS: Reading Scientology’s founding text cover to cover | UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists | GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice | SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts | Shelly Miscavige, 14 years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Watch our short videos that explain Scientology’s controversies in three minutes or less…

Check your whale level at our dedicated page for status updates, or join us at the Underground Bunker’s Facebook discussion group for more frivolity.

Our non-Scientology stories: Robert Burnham Jr., the man who inscribed the universe | Notorious alt-right inspiration Kevin MacDonald and his theories about Jewish DNA | The selling of the “Phoenix Lights” | Astronomer Harlow Shapley‘s FBI file | Sex, spies, and local TV news | Battling Babe-Hounds: Ross Jeffries v. R. Don Steele


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