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Tom Cruise’s Scientology superpowers, No. 15: Always finding the best parking spot

 
We have a recurring tradition of using the month of August to publish a list of fun stuff in order to spruce things up around here.

It was in August 2011, for example, that we turned our lives upside down (ours, and our wonderful commenters) with a list at the Village Voice, “Top 25 People Crippling Scientology.” In some ways, that exercise was the reason we’re still writing daily about Scientology a decade later.

Last year, we started a list in August that went all the way into the next year, “Top 25 People Enabling Scientology,” which we are particularly proud of. It’s one thing to call out Scientology controversies, it’s another to hold up for examination the people in business, law, and politics who are helping Scientology wreak havoc on so many lives.

This year, we decided we’d focus on what seems to be just about everyone’s favorite Scientology topic: Mr. Top Gun himself, Thomas Mapother IV, a/k/a movie superstar Tom Cruise.

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Cruise was brought into Scientology by actress Mimi Rogers in 1986, when they started dating. He was drawn into it so quickly they were married on Dianetics Day, May 9, 1987. With Scientology leader David Miscavige’s encouragement in 1990 Cruise dumped Mimi for actress Nicole Kidman, who initially embraced Scientology in a big way. Her former auditor Bruce Hines told us she got all the way to OT 2 in only a couple of years. But then she pulled away from Scientology and brought Tom with her. He was mostly away from the group until he ended up dumping Nicole in 2000. Then Miscavige made it job one to get Cruise back in the fold. By 2004 Cruise was so gung-ho, Miscavige gave him a Freedom Medal of Valor and an awards ceremony that featured a 30-minute video all about Top Gun. And it was in that video that the narrator revealed that Tom was OT 7 at that point.

In the 17 years since then, has Tom reached the ultimate auditing level on the Bridge, OT 8? Most everyone who completes OT 7 does go on to the cruise ship Freewinds for the final step. And after Kirstie Alley made that move in 2018, one of Scientology’s own publications boasted about it. But so far, we still haven’t seen any published evidence that Cruise has finished OT 8 and is an Operating Thetan.

Whether he’s OT 7 or OT 8, there’s no question that Tom Cruise is a dedicated OT Scientologist who is a true believer. And that means he’s expecting that his years of dedication to L. Ron Hubbard’s “technology” will bring him various superpowers which other Scientology OTs boast about all the time in the church’s publications.

So what, exactly, can Tom Cruise do now that he’s an Operating Thetan himself? We thought we’d go over some of those benefits of dedication to Scientology, beginning with one of his more modest abilities and moving up to the really amazing stuff by the end of our countdown.

Let’s start at number 15: Tom’s ability to find the best parking spot, every time!

Our longtime readers know that we’re referring to here: Scientology’s own habit of publishing the miracles experienced by its OTs in its publication Advance! magazine. In a section known as “OT Phenomena,” Scientologists are encouraged to share their stories of their new-found abilities with other church members to inspire them to spend the hundreds of thousands of dollars for counseling so they too can experience these “wins.”

We’ve published examples of these OT success stories for years, and one thing that has always struck us is how many of them have to do with driving, green lights, parking spaces, and other fortuitous little coincidences.

Here’s a short sample of the dozens of these stories we’ve published over the years. And yes, these are actual stories of OT miracles published by Scientology’s own magazine over the years as examples of the superpowers that you too will attain once you’ve spent the fortune in cash it costs to go OT…

This has to do with postulates and intention. I was driving down Alvarado Blvd. toward a bookstore that I wanted to stop in to for information. But I knew that the parking around the place was usually very difficult and I didn’t want to spend the time walking from a distant parking place. So I just started intending that there would be a space available for me in front of the store. Just a light little postulate and with no counter-intention there. A half a block away I could see that there were no parking places available. But when I was within 100 yards of the store a man came out and got in his car which was parked all but in front of the store. I just pulled up behind him so that he had plenty of room to pull out and in a twinkle I was into the spot. — Jonathan Fox, OT

I had just completed a step at the AO and knew I had acquired a new ability. That evening while driving home, I came to a red light and put what I gained to the test. With my full intention on the traffic light, it immediately turned green. I came to another red light and did the same thing, with an identical result. At first I thought it might be a coincidence but then all the way home, I made every light green or stay green. Moreover, I didn’t wait for a light all week. — J.W.

I was standing at a bus stop in the inner suburbs of my city on a road with heavy traffic at 8:00 a.m. I was running late and was wondering how I was going to keep my early appointment, knowing full well that the majority of buses would be full and would not stop for me. Then a taxi approached traveling in the opposite direction. The driver’s eyes and mine made contact for a 100th of a second and then he had passed. The taxi then made an illegal turn and 60 seconds later he pulled up right in front of me and 20 surprised commuters. I got in the taxi and was on my way. There had been no other physical contact between us other than fleeting eye contact. I marveled at the power of postulates and OT intention. —R.C.

After a solo session I went to the Examiner and then got into an elevator to go to the Solo Board I/C. I got off the elevator, began walking and then realised I should go to another floor instead. When I turned back around, the same elevator doors opened up and I got in. The people inside were smiling at me. I found out that someone inside the elevator somehow picked up on the fact that I would need to get back into the elevator, so they brought it back for me. And after this happened, whenever I needed the elevator, I would simply walk up to it and the doors would immediately open for me. — L.M.

So let’s congratulate Tom that while he’s on the move, he can make elevator doors open, turn lights from red to green, and find the best parking spot wherever he’s going, and all it took was a cool couple of million in donations to the Church of Scientology!

 

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Tom Cruise’s Scientology superpowers

1. Shattering the suppression from a 15-year-old
2. Achieving godhood
3. Resisting between-life amnesia
4. Destroying a planet with the touch of a finger
5. Leaving his body with full perception
6. Resuscitating the recently deceased
7. Pulling in objects with tractor beams
8. Recovering unspeakable acts from the past
9. Mocking up an automobile out of thin air
10. Drying out from space coke
11. Levitating an ashtray
12. Resisting illnesses with his mind alone
13. Communicating with anyone on any subject

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14. Helping at the scene of a car accident
15. Always finding the best parking spot

 
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Bonus items from our tipsters

Meanwhile, on the Freewinds…

 

 
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Source Code

“This planet is part of an earlier federation and passed out of its control due to losses in war and other such things. Now, this larger confederacy, this isn’t its right name, but we have often called it and referred to it in the past as the Marcab Confederacy. And it has been wrongly or rightly pointed to as one of the tail stars of the Big Dipper, which is the capital planet of which this planet is. Now, all this sounds very Space Opera-ish and that sort of thing, and I’m sorry for it, but I am not one to quibble about the truth. This gets in people’s hair every now and then, and I don’t see any point in lying in order to be acceptable. It just doesn’t seem to be a right way to go about things, particularly in the realm of science.” — L. Ron Hubbard, August 6, 1963

 
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Avast, Ye Mateys

“LIONS: The local Lions Club was entertained aboard with great success. Candlelit dining room, guitar music. Caviar, lobster, salad and cigars and cognac after. 25 came. They cancelled their own first dinner of the season and came to ours. High commendables to Peter Warren, John Bragin and our two magnificent girls Mrs. Jone van Hoecke and Mme Francoise Cugnot, Sven as Chef and Kenilee Moore as Maitre de Hotel, and the waiters Rick, Jesse, Charles, Bob and several others. It was very commendable team work. Very well done! Our PRO Area Control has been greatly advanced with local influential business men.” — The Commodore, August 6, 1971

 
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Overheard in the FreeZone

“I actually first became interested in the occult, oriental religion and hypnotism due to the pulp author Robert E. Howard through ‘the People of the Black Circle’ or some such story. I very much like the Doc Savage novels, which propose an admixture of mental techniques and physical practices that result in a superhuman physical capacity and a preternatural understanding. I am very much a fan of Ayn Rand and Nathaniel Branden, though not so much Leonard Peikoff. He is the Miscavige of Objectivism. I have only met a couple of Scientologists for sure, but when I was a child my mother practiced some of the methods and used a Hubbardic pidgin when talking about politics.”

 
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Past is Prologue

1998: Celebrity Center International held its 29th anniversary celebration this week. “At a Hollywood gala celebration television and film stars Kirstie Alley, Jenna Elfman, Giovanni Ribisi, Catherine Bell, Anne Archer, Isaac Hayes, Leah Remini, Jennifer Aspen and Danny Masterson, along with community leaders and thousands more, joined together at the 29th Anniversary of the Church of Scientology Celebrity Centre to celebrate and acknowledge the hundreds of thousands who have been helped through the civic accomplishments this past year, and the continued growth, of the Scientology religion internationally. Elfman, who is about to start filming her second season of ‘Dharma and Greg,’ expressed how happy she was to hear about all the positive results being achieved by her Church in the community.”

 
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Random Howdy

“What kinda nut would think you could listen to Martians on an E-meter? Any sane person knows the only way you could listen to Martians is when you’re at the implant station on Mars, sheesh.”

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Full Court Press: What we’re watching at the Underground Bunker

Criminal prosecutions:
Danny Masterson charged for raping three women: Next hearing set for August 9. Trial tentatively scheduled for early November.
Jay and Jeff Spina, Medicare fraud: Jay sentenced to 9 years in prison. Jeff’s sentencing to be scheduled.
Hanan and Rizza Islam and other family members, Medi-Cal fraud: Pretrial conference August 21 in Los Angeles
David Gentile, GPB Capital, fraud: Next pretrial conference set for Sept 9.

Civil litigation:
Luis and Rocio Garcia v. Scientology: Oral arguments were heard on July 30, 2020 at the Eleventh Circuit
Valerie Haney v. Scientology: Forced to ‘religious arbitration.’ Petition to US Supreme Court submitted on May 26. Scientology responded on June 25.
Chrissie Bixler et al. v. Scientology and Danny Masterson: California Supreme Court granted review on May 26 and asked the Second Appellate Division to direct Judge Steven Kleifield to show cause why he granted Scientology’s motion for arbitration. Oral arguments scheduled for Oct 5.
Matt and Kathy Feschbach tax debt: Eleventh Circuit ruled on Sept 9 that Feshbachs can’t discharge IRS debt in bankruptcy. Dec 17: Feshbachs sign court judgment obliging them to pay entire $3.674 million tax debt, plus interest from Nov 19.
Brian Statler Sr v. City of Inglewood: Third amended complaint filed, trial set for Nov 9, 2021.
Author Steve Cannane defamation trial: Trial concluded, Cannane victorious, awarded court costs. Case appealed on Dec 23. Appeal hearing scheduled for Aug 23-27.

Concluded litigation:
Dennis Nobbe, Medicare fraud, PPP loan fraud: Charged July 29. Bond revoked Sep 14. Nobbe dead, Sep 14.
Jane Doe v. Scientology (in Miami): Jane Doe dismissed the lawsuit on May 15 after the Clearwater Police dropped their criminal investigation of her allegations.

 
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THE PROSECUTION OF DANNY MASTERSON

We first broke the news of the LAPD’s investigation of Scientology celebrity Danny Masterson on rape allegations in 2017, and we’ve been covering the story every step of the way since then. At this page we’ve collected our most important links, including our four days in Los Angeles covering the preliminary hearing and its ruling, which has Danny facing trial and the potential sentence of 45 years to life in prison.

SCIENTOLOGY: FAIR GAME

After the success of their double-Emmy-winning, three-season A&E series ‘Scientology and the Aftermath,’ Leah Remini and Mike Rinder continue the conversation on their podcast, ‘Scientology: Fair Game.’ We’ve created a landing page where you can hear all of the episodes so far.

LEAH REMINI: SCIENTOLOGY AND THE AFTERMATH

An episode-by-episode guide to Leah Remini’s three-season, double-Emmy winning series that changed everything for Scientology watching. Originally aired from 2016 to 2019 on the A&E network, and now on Netflix.

SCIENTOLOGY’S CELEBRITIES, from A to Z

Find your favorite Hubbardite celeb at this index page — or suggest someone to add to the list!

 
Other links: SCIENTOLOGY BLACK OPS: Tom Cruise and dirty tricks. Scientology’s Ideal Orgs, from one end of the planet to the other. Scientology’s sneaky front groups, spreading the good news about L. Ron Hubbard while pretending to benefit society. Scientology Lit: Books reviewed or excerpted in a weekly series. How many have you read?

 
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THE WHOLE TRACK

[ONE year ago] Nazanin Boniadi chides Karen Bass for ‘insufficient’ statement on Scientology speech
[TWO years ago] Scientology’s secret weapon to get its clutches on your children
[THREE years ago] If it’s wrong to love Scientology hip-hop, we don’t want to be right
[FOUR years ago] Scientology subjects young children to quack therapies — now, someone is taking a stand
[FIVE years ago] So much for all that: Attempt by Garcias to revive Scientology lawsuit shot down by judge
[SIX years ago] Um, about that story claiming Will Smith got a ‘refund’ from his broke-ass shuttered school…
[SEVEN years ago] Maybe the saddest Scientology promo video ever, and a history lesson from Mark Bunker!
[EIGHT years ago] Mary Sue Hubbard’s Last Will Fulfilled: Her Dog Bereft of Life, It’s Time to Sell Her House!
[TEN years ago] Scientology Delirium: Commenters of the Week!

 
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Scientology disconnection, a reminder

Bernie Headley (1952-2019) did not see his daughter Stephanie in his final 5,667 days.
Valerie Haney has not seen her mother Lynne in 2,384 days.
Katrina Reyes has not seen her mother Yelena in 2,889 days
Sylvia Wagner DeWall has not seen her brother Randy in 2,409 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his grandson Leo in 1,429 days.
Geoff Levin has not seen his son Collin and daughter Savannah in 1,320 days.
Christie Collbran has not seen her mother Liz King in 4,627 days.
Clarissa Adams has not seen her parents Walter and Irmin Huber in 2,495 days.
Carol Nyburg has not seen her daughter Nancy in 3,269 days.
Doug Kramer has not seen his parents Linda and Norm in 1,599 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 4,073 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 3,389 days.
Dylan Gill has not seen his father Russell in 11,955 days.
Melissa Paris has not seen her father Jean-Francois in 7,874 days.
Valeska Paris has not seen her brother Raphael in 4,042 days.
Mirriam Francis has not seen her brother Ben in 3,623 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 3,884 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 2,922 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica in 2,635 days.
Marie Bilheimer has not seen her mother June in 2,160 days.
Julian Wain has not seen his brother Joseph or mother Susan in 515 days.
Charley Updegrove has not seen his son Toby in 1,690 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 6,241 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 3,390 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 3,710 days.
Roger Weller has not seen his daughter Alyssa in 8,565 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 3,684 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 2,040 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin and daughter Taryn in 6,343 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 2,449 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis in 2,847 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 2,723 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 2,306 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike and daughter Emily in 2,801 days.
Mary Jane Barry has not seen her daughter Samantha in 3,055 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 14,164 days.

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Posted by Tony Ortega on August 6, 2021 at 07:00

E-mail tips to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We also post updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our new book with Paulette Cooper, Battlefield Scientology: Exposing L. Ron Hubbard’s dangerous ‘religion’ is now on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats. Our book about Paulette, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2020 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Underground Bunker (2012-2020), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Other links: BLOGGING DIANETICS: Reading Scientology’s founding text cover to cover | UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists | GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice | SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts | Shelly Miscavige, 15 years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Watch our short videos that explain Scientology’s controversies in three minutes or less…

Check your whale level at our dedicated page for status updates, or join us at the Underground Bunker’s Facebook discussion group for more frivolity.

Our non-Scientology stories: Robert Burnham Jr., the man who inscribed the universe | Notorious alt-right inspiration Kevin MacDonald and his theories about Jewish DNA | The selling of the “Phoenix Lights” | Astronomer Harlow Shapley‘s FBI file | Sex, spies, and local TV news | Battling Babe-Hounds: Ross Jeffries v. R. Don Steele

 

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