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More job listings for Scientologists from Scientology’s sneaky front

[Come work in paradise, pilgrim!]

TODAY AT SUBSTACK: If you’ve signed up for free emails at Substack, you will receive today’s feature story at your inbox: Last month we told you that WISE, Scientology’s sneaky front that targets dentists, chiropractors and veterinarians for recruitment had put out classified ads for Scientologists, and well, they’ve done it again! Need a job, thetan? Check out these openings! [What is this Substack thing, anyway?]


Technology Cocktail


“There have been several examples recently of pcs ending session with an unflat process after which the repair session was delayed for several days or even weeks and the pc came down with a cold or had some minor accident or got in Ethics trouble. Thus Repair has priority.” — L. Ron Hubbard, 1970



We first broke the news of the LAPD’s investigation of Scientology celebrity Danny Masterson on rape allegations in 2017, and we’ve been covering the story every step of the way since then. At this page we’ve collected our most important links as Danny faces a potential sentence of 45 years to life in prison. NOW WITH TRIAL INDEX.


THE PODCAST: How many have you heard?

[1] Marc Headley [2] Claire Headley [3] Jeffrey Augustine [4] Bruce Hines [5] Sunny Pereira [6] Pete Griffiths [7] Geoff Levin [8] Patty Moher [9] Marc Headley [10] Jefferson Hawkins [11] Michelle ‘Emma’ Ryan [12] Paulette Cooper [13] Jesse Prince [14] Mark Bunker [15] Jon Atack [16] Mirriam Francis [17] Bruce Hines on MSH

— SPECIAL: The best TV show on Scientology you never got to see

[1] Phil Jones [2] Derek Bloch [3] Carol Nyburg [4] Katrina Reyes [5] Jamie DeWolf

— The first Danny Masterson trial and beyond

[18] Trial special with Chris Shelton [19] Trial week one [20] Marc Headley on the spy in the hallway [21] Trial week two [22] Trial week three [23] Trial week four [24] Leah Remini on LAPD Corruption [25] Mike Rinder 2022 Thanksgiving Special [26] Jane Doe 4 (Tricia Vessey), Part One [27] Jane Doe 4 (Tricia Vessey), Part Two [28] Claire Headley on the trial [29] Tory Christman [30] Bruce Hines on spying [31] Karen de la Carriere [32] Ron Miscavige on Shelly Miscavige [33] Karen de la Carriere on the L’s [34] Mark Bunker on Miscavige hiding [35] Mark Plummer [36] Mark Ebner [37] Karen Pressley [38] Steve Cannane [39] Fredrick Brennan [40] Clarissa Adams [41] Louise Shekter [42] John Sweeney [43] Tory Christman [44] Kate Bornstein [45] Christian Stolte [46] Mark Bunker [47] Jon Atack [48] Luke Y. Thompson [49] Mark Ebner [50] Bruce Hines [51] Spanky Taylor and Karen Pressley [51] Geoff and Robbie Levin [52] Sands Hall [53] Jonny Jacobsen [54] Sandy Holeman [55] Mark Bunker [56] Trish and Liz Conley [57] Trish Conley [58] Alex Barnes-Ross [59] Alex Barnes-Ross [60] Alex Barnes-Ross [61] Alex Barnes-Ross [62] Alex Barnes-Ross [63] Alex Barnes-Ross [64] Tory Christman [65] Tammy Synovec [66] Dennis Erlich [67] Alex Barnes-Ross [68] Valerie Ross [69] Kat in Austin [70] Mark Bunker [71] Phil Jones



Source Code

“It’s pretty hard to complete a cycle in a half a billion years. You can try. And you get it down to a million years, and of course, to get anything done in a million years and make it stick, that’s really going some, man, you’re really on your way, that’s tearing the ground up in all directions. The length of time since the birth of Chr — the alleged birth of Christ — is so short, that before you’ve gone very long on the road to OT, you could probably remember what you had for breakfast in the year 2, and during the third day of the Saturnalia or something like that. Not that you would, probably cause you as much work to remember what you had for breakfast that morning as it does now to remember what you had for breakfast yesterday, see. You probably can’t think of what you had for breakfast yesterday right now. So that is a very finite period of time. That’s a very short period of time. A couple of thousand years, nothing. I’d like a couple of thousand years just to sit on a rock and look at the scenery — one of my ambitions.” — L. Ron Hubbard, May 30, 1963


Avast, Ye Mateys

“PERSONAL HYGIENE: CS-6 and the Public Officer’s nominee should compose a short course on personal hygiene and cleanliness. A ship is a small place. In old navies the penalty was a bath with sand and canvas and a ducking for those with deficiencies.” — The Commodore, May 30, 1970


Overheard in the FreeZone

“Now that the virus has been shown to be no worse than the common flu, it has emerged that its purpose was to affect the economy of the USA to derail Trump’s re-election. That can be the next job for Clears and OTs to handle as a team.”



Past is Prologue

1998: The St. Petersburg Times reported this week that Scientology plans to move a large tree before building the Super Power building on the site. “The tree, thought to be more than 100 years old, once was part of a large hammock of oaks along Clearwater’s waterfront bluff before downtown was developed. It stands 65 feet tall and weighs about 125 tons. Its trunk is 44 inches thick, and its boughs reach 120 feet across. Its life began when the city’s name was two words, Clear Water. Fort Harrison Avenue and Cleveland Street were paved then with shells from a local Indian mound. Today, the tree stands near the center of a dusty city block at 215 S Fort Harrison Ave., the site of a massive new building planned by the Church of Scientology. Legally, the church could turn the tree into firewood to make way for the project. Instead, it has hired Westenberger to perform an unusual service: move the tree to the front of the lot where it can shade the new building’s glass-enclosed lobby alongside two other existing oaks. The project normally would cost about $120,000, but donations of materials by local businesses will help trim the church’s bill to about $80,000, Westenberger said. Westenberger’s strategy is to relieve any stress on the tree and strengthen its root system. Then he and his crew will methodically cut the ground around it into a giant root ball. They will hoist it out of the only ground the tree has ever known, and move it to a new patch of earth 120 feet to the west. At present, Westenberger and church staff are soaking the roots daily with a vitamin and hormone spray. Construction soon will begin on the root ball, a painstaking process designed to stress the tree as little as possible.”


Random Howdy

“First there was the Thetaverse and the Thetans were born, and through shared agreement and control of MEST (superpowers) they created other universes and then they created the MEST universe so they could assume physical form and have a playground to play ‘games’ in and enjoy the pleasures of the flesh. But eventually they forgot all this. And I thought to myself, ‘Hey, isn’t this a Star Trek or Outer Limits episode?’”


Full Court Press: What we’re watching at the Underground Bunker

Criminal prosecutions:
Danny Masterson charged for raping three women: Found guilty on two counts on May 31, remanded to custody. Sentenced to 30 years to life on Sep 7.
‘Lafayette Ronald Hubbard’ (a/k/a Justin Craig), aggravated assault, plus drug charges: Grand jury indictments include charges from an assault while in custody. Next pretrial hearing May 31, 2024.
David Gentile, GPB Capital, fraud.

Civil litigation:
Leah Remini v. Scientology, alleging ‘Fair Game’ harassment and defamation: Some defamation claims were removed by Judge Hammock. Leah seeking to amend her complaint.
Baxter, Baxter, and Paris v. Scientology, alleging labor trafficking: Forced to arbitration.
Valerie Haney v. Scientology: Forced to ‘religious arbitration.’
Chrissie Bixler et al. v. Scientology and Danny Masterson: motion to file new complaint, hearing on May 29.
Jane Doe 1 v. Scientology, David Miscavige, and Gavin Potter: Case unsealed and second amended complaint filed. Scientology moves for religious arbitration, on hold until appeal over new judge heard.
Chiropractors Steve Peyroux and Brent Detelich, stem cell fraud: Ordered to mediation.



After the success of their double-Emmy-winning, three-season A&E series ‘Scientology and the Aftermath,’ Leah Remini and Mike Rinder continue the conversation on their podcast, ‘Scientology: Fair Game.’ We’ve created a landing page where you can hear all of the episodes so far.


An episode-by-episode guide to Leah Remini’s three-season, double-Emmy winning series that changed everything for Scientology watching. Originally aired from 2016 to 2019 on the A&E network, and now on Netflix.


Find your favorite Hubbardite celeb at this index page — or suggest someone to add to the list!

Other links: SCIENTOLOGY BLACK OPS: Tom Cruise and dirty tricks. Scientology’s Ideal Orgs, from one end of the planet to the other. Scientology’s sneaky front groups, spreading the good news about L. Ron Hubbard while pretending to benefit society. Scientology Lit: Books reviewed or excerpted in a weekly series. How many have you read?



[ONE year ago] New website sets out to document Scientology cancer and other deaths
[TWO years ago] The subchaser that never was: L. Ron Hubbard’s farcical first command
[THREE years ago] Today at The Daily Beast: Ron and Leni, a Scientology mystery solved
[FOUR years ago] Steve Cannane wrote the book about Scientology in Australia — and now he’s on trial
[FIVE years ago] Scientology’s slick new ‘Freewinds’ magazine surprisingly makes no mention of measles
[SIX years ago] Bad boys of the Sea Org: guns, drugs, murder and Scientology
[SEVEN years ago] To counter Leah Remini’s return to A&E, Scientology recruits her father in smear attack
[EIGHT years ago] How Scientology’s smears of Ron Miscavige could end up a bigger problem for his son Dave
[NINE years ago] Jon Atack: Auditing and recovered memory — why do Scientologists accept it as fact?
[TEN years ago] Three videos the Church of Scientology would rather you not watch
[ELEVEN years ago] Word To Your Mother: Dianetics And Its Lack of Boundaries


Scientology disconnection, a reminder

Bernie Headley (1952-2019) did not see his daughter Stephanie in his final 5,667 days.
Tammy Synovec has not seen her daughter Julia in 2,916 days.
Valerie Haney has not seen her mother Lynne in 3,411 days.
Katrina Reyes has not seen her mother Yelena in 3,926 days
Sylvia Wagner DeWall has not seen her brother Randy in 3,476 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his grandson Leo in 2,466 days.
Geoff Levin has not seen his son Collin and daughter Savannah in 2,347 days.
Christie Collbran has not seen her mother Liz King in 5,651 days.
Clarissa Adams has not seen her parents Walter and Irmin Huber in 3,522 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 5,074 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 4,415 days.
Dylan Gill has not seen his father Russell in 12,982 days.
Melissa Paris has not seen her father Jean-Francois in 8,901 days.
Valeska Paris has not seen her brother Raphael in 5,069 days.
Mirriam Francis has not seen her brother Ben in 4,650 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 4,911 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 3,947 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica in 3,663 days.
Marie Bilheimer has not seen her mother June in 3,227 days.
Julian Wain has not seen his brother Joseph or mother Susan in 1,542 days.
Charley Updegrove has not seen his son Toby in 2,717 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 7,268 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 4,399 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 4,737 days.
Roger Weller has not seen his daughter Alyssa in 9,590 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 4,711 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 3,067 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin and daughter Taryn in 7,370 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 3,476 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis in 3,874 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 3,750 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 3,315 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike and daughter Emily in 3,828 days.
Mary Jane Barry has not seen her daughter Samantha in 4,082 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 15,190 days.


Posted by Tony Ortega on May 30, 2024 at 07:00

E-mail tips to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We also post updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our new book with Paulette Cooper, Battlefield Scientology: Exposing L. Ron Hubbard’s dangerous ‘religion’ is now on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats. Our book about Paulette, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2023 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Underground Bunker (2012-2023), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Other links: BLOGGING DIANETICS: Reading Scientology’s founding text cover to cover | UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists | GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice | SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts | Shelly Miscavige, 15 years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Watch our short videos that explain Scientology’s controversies in three minutes or less…

Check your whale level at our dedicated page for status updates, or join us at the Underground Bunker’s Facebook discussion group for more frivolity.

Our non-Scientology stories: Robert Burnham Jr., the man who inscribed the universe | Notorious alt-right inspiration Kevin MacDonald and his theories about Jewish DNA | The selling of the “Phoenix Lights” | Astronomer Harlow Shapley‘s FBI file | Sex, spies, and local TV news | Battling Babe-Hounds: Ross Jeffries v. R. Don Steele


Tony Ortega at The Daily Beast


Tony Ortega at Rolling Stone


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