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Hey, slacker, come on back to Scientology — things are peachy now!

[Working for Scientology is so much fun now!]

On Saturday, we posted a strange, one-line letter that a Church of Scientology subsidiary sent to Sylvia DeWall. The letter was creepy, but it was difficult to tell whether it was an intimidation attempt or a hapless recruitment effort.

But at least our posting it had one good effect: It motivated another longtime reader to send in a letter they recently received that we found just as interesting.

Our contributor this time is in a precarious situation and so we’re doing our best not to reveal their identity. But when we told them how interested we were in the letter, they told us they wanted us to post it.

This is more clearly an attempt to “recover” a Scientologist who has walked away, an increasing problem for an organization that has been hemorrhaging people for many years. But we found the letter-writer’s pitch — that things are so much better now on staff — pretty interesting! We’d love to hear from other former staff members what they think of this writer’s claims.



Dear [redacted],

I’m not sure how to even begin a letter to you as it’s been so long since I’ve seen or spoken to you. I’ve been on Staff now at [redacted] for 27 years, and the only window I remember with you was that horrible time when we moved into [redacted]. I’m glad those days are over. I know they caused you a lot of enturbulation — particularly from the Mission that had come in, and for that I am most sorry. Sometimes stupidity and Serfacs rule the day — yes, I now it’s all over the Track — but we of all beings should not have dramatized them.

Actually I know you more from the PC programs you’ve written than from personal contact. Your Programs reeked of compassion and caring, and I want you to know that I for one DO appreciate what you did as a C/S. And as a trained C/S and SHSBC Grad I am qualified to state this!

Those of us that have survived on Staff have thankfully made it through to a much better time, sort of like a jet that pops through a heavy overcast and all of a sudden things are bright and sunny. Staff are all going up the Bridge these days, schedules are sane and compassion and kindness rule rather than some weird militaristic viewpoint. It’s like someone discovered how to actually apply the ARC triangle. Actually, I know who that someone is, and I appreciate him immensely for it.

I’d like to encourage you to at least view some of the Scientology TV episodes so you can get an idea of what real Scientology is about and the products we’re getting around the world. Shows in the VOICES OF HUMANITY or the INSIDE SCIENTOLOGY Series will do that, and maybe even enable you to blow some encrusted BPC. If you could do this — not for me but for yourself — please let me know.




Bonus items from our tipsters

Meanwhile, in Canada…


California is almost cleared!



Scientology’s celebrities, ‘Ideal Orgs,’ and more!

[The Big Three: Tom Cruise, John Travolta, and Kirstie Alley]

We’ve been building landing pages about David Miscavige’s favorite playthings, including celebrities and ‘Ideal Orgs,’ and we’re hoping you’ll join in and help us gather as much information as we can about them. Head on over and help us with links and photos and comments.

Scientology’s celebrities, from A to Z! Find your favorite Hubbardite celeb at this index page — or suggest someone to add to the list!

Scientology’s ‘Ideal Orgs,’ from one end of the planet to the other! Help us build up pages about each these worldwide locations!

Scientology’s sneaky front groups, spreading the good news about L. Ron Hubbard while pretending to benefit society!

Scientology Lit: Books reviewed or excerpted in our weekly series. How many have you read?



[TWO years ago] Scientology shifting front group strategy — it’s all about kids, kids, kids
[THREE years ago] Bomb diggety! It’s more Scientologists high on L. Ron Hubbard and the everloving ‘tech’
[FOUR years ago] The Church of Scientology: A rollicking legacy of belligerence, profanity, paranoia, and violence
[FIVE years ago] LIVE BLOG: The Elli Perkins story tonight on the ID Network, ‘The Scientology Cure’
[SIX years ago] Claire Headley: Scientology’s Own Rules Prove That it Uses “Disconnection” To Split Up Families


Scientology disconnection, a reminder

Bernie Headley has not seen his daughter Stephanie in 5,516 days.
Valerie Haney has not seen her mother Lynne in 1,645 days.
Katrina Reyes has not seen her mother Yelena in 2,149 days
Sylvia Wagner DeWall has not seen her brother Randy in 1,669 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his grandson Leo in 689 days.
Geoff Levin has not seen his son Collin and daughter Savannah in 580 days.
Christie Collbran has not seen her mother Liz King in 3,887 days.
Clarissa Adams has not seen her parents Walter and Irmin Huber in 1,755 days.
Carol Nyburg has not seen her daughter Nancy in 2,529 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 3,303 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 2,649 days.
Dylan Gill has not seen his father Russell in 11,215 days.
Melissa Paris has not seen her father Jean-Francois in 7,134 days.
Valeska Paris has not seen her brother Raphael in 3,302 days.
Mirriam Francis has not seen her brother Ben in 2,883 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 3,144 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 2,183 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica in 1,895 days.
Marie Bilheimer has not seen her mother June in 1,421 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 5,510 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 2,650 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 2,970 days.
Roger Weller has not seen his daughter Alyssa in 7,826 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 2,945 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 1,300 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin and daughter Taryn in 5,603 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 1,709 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis in 2,111 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 1,983 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 1,566 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike and daughter Emily in 2,061 days.
Mary Jane Sterne has not seen her daughter Samantha in 2,315 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 13,424 days.


Posted by Tony Ortega on July 23, 2019 at 07:00

E-mail tips to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We also post updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our new book with Paulette Cooper, Battlefield Scientology: Exposing L. Ron Hubbard’s dangerous ‘religion’ is now on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats. Our book about Paulette, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2018 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Underground Bunker (2012-2018), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Other links: BLOGGING DIANETICS: Reading Scientology’s founding text cover to cover | UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists | GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice | SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts | Shelly Miscavige, ten years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Watch our short videos that explain Scientology’s controversies in three minutes or less…

Check your whale level at our dedicated page for status updates, or join us at the Underground Bunker’s Facebook discussion group for more frivolity.

Our non-Scientology stories: Robert Burnham Jr., the man who inscribed the universe | Notorious alt-right inspiration Kevin MacDonald and his theories about Jewish DNA | The selling of the “Phoenix Lights” | Astronomer Harlow Shapley‘s FBI file | Sex, spies, and local TV news | Battling Babe-Hounds: Ross Jeffries v. R. Don Steele


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