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Bomb diggety! It’s more Scientologists high on L. Ron Hubbard and the everloving ‘tech’

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One of our tipsters came through for us today with some hilarious screenshots from the latest testimonials video that was sent out to Scientology members. In the past, we’ve had the video itself, and we hope eventually to get this one. But for now, we’re just really happy to get these glimpses of Scientologists high on L. Ron Hubbard. What a gas.

The video appeared on a DVD which came with the new issue of International Scientology News, the magazine that documents all of church leader David Miscavige’s claims of expansion. Over at Mike Rinder’s blog, the former Scientology spokesman has been breaking down those expansion claims from the new issue.

But we always love the testimonials video for its driving beat and the wacky claims that Scientologists make about whatever product they’re pushing this year — it’s always the bestest ever.

So let’s take a look at the glimpses of Scientology nirvana that were included in this year’s video.

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We’ll start with this interesting look at a room at Scientology Media Productions labeled “Central ingest.” One of our oldtimers can help us understand that one, we hope…

 
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Now, let’s hear about some wins from folks fresh off the E-meter…

 
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Hey, isn’t this Australian singer Kate Ceberano gushing about reaching OT 8, the top of the Bridge? Wow, she’s superhuman now and can affect matter with only her mind…

 
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We really don’t know what’s going on with this butterfly, but it sounds major…

 
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Anyone recognize this woman who feels like Iron Man? She sure looks familiar to us…

 
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You don’t want to get between this lady and her eternity…

 
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You think this guy includes his superpower in his online dating profile?

 
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And finally, here’s maybe the best thing of all. The “Internet unit.” So this is where all the socks come from! Everyone wave hello!

 
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Thanks again to our tipster for these great screengrabs. As for the video itself, if there’s anyone who can get us a copy, we’d sure like to see these folks in action.

 
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3D-UnbreakablePosted by Tony Ortega on July 23, 2016 at 07:00

E-mail tips and story ideas to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We post behind-the-scenes updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our book, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle editions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information about the book, and our 2015 book tour, can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

Learn about Scientology with our numerous series with experts…

BLOGGING DIANETICS: We read Scientology’s founding text cover to cover with the help of L.A. attorney and former church member Vance Woodward
UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists
GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice
SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts

Other links: Shelly Miscavige, ten years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | Scientology’s Private Dancer | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | Scientology boasts about assistance from Google | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Our Guide to Alex Gibney’s film ‘Going Clear,’ and our pages about its principal figures…
Jason Beghe | Tom DeVocht | Sara Goldberg | Paul Haggis | Mark “Marty” Rathbun | Mike Rinder | Spanky Taylor | Hana Whitfield

 

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