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Federal judge urged to ignore Scientology whining and get on with arbitration disaster

[Luis and Rocio Garcia, and Judge Whittemore]

Luis and Rocio Garcia are more aware than anyone that when Tampa federal Judge James Whittemore begins calling Scientologists to ask for their participation in an arbitration, all hell is likely to break loose.

But as they point out in a new court filing, they think it’s important for the judge to learn that on his own, and Scientology should stop complaining and get out of the way. Here’s how the Garcias’ attorney Ted Babbitt put it in their response to Scientology’s most recent whiny motion:

If [it’s] true that Scientologists by their nature would hesitate to be involved in any proceeding directed by this Court shouldn’t the Court find that out? If Scientologists simply wouldn’t take part in a fair and unbiased proceeding isn’t that exactly what the Court should know? If it is true as Defendants’ state in Page 3 of their current motion, “that direct contact to Scientology parishioners from a civil court about Scientology procedure may cause alarm of such individuals” doesn’t that confirm what Plaintiffs have argued?

What the Garcias have been arguing since they filed their fraud lawsuit in 2013 is that they were lied to by a church that has no scruples about manipulating its members in order to get donations from them. The church argued back that the Garcias had signed membership contracts requiring them to submit any grievances to internal arbitration, and in 2015 Judge Whittemore agreed, staying the lawsuit. But in the two years since then, the two sides have been unable to set up a panel of three arbitrators, who must be Scientologists in good standing. So Whittemore stepped in, ordering the church to give him the names and contact information for 500 Los Angeles-area Scientologists so he (or his clerks) could personally call people from the list and set up the three-member arbitration panel.

Multiple times, Scientology has filed motions essentially telling the judge he can’t do that, and the Garcias, in this new filing, point out that the church’s complaints simply reflect what a sham the arbitration is. (Multiple former Scientology executives have testified that the contracts were fraudulently set up to keep members from getting refunds, and the church itself admitted in court that it has never, in its decades-long history, ever even attempted an internal arbitration in the past.)

So now the Garcias have submitted their response, encouraging Judge Whittemore to ignore the church’s attempted roadblocks, and the real fun should begin. Start making phone calls, judge! We can’t wait to hear how it turns out!

 
GARCIAOppositionToClarification

 
——————–

Man delivers book critique four years after publication

Oh man, if Marty Rathbun’s new videos are going to be this boring, this is going to be brutal.

More than four years after Lawrence Wright’s Going Clear: Scientology, Hollywood, and the Prison of Belief hit bookshelves, Rathbun is apparently going to give us a point-by-point critique of it.

If you want a preview of where he’s going, you can see that he already made these exact points — that Wright was supposedly less objective regarding Scientology than he was reporting on Al Qaeda in his book The Looming Tower — in a blog post Rathbun wrote when Going Clear actually did come out back in 2013.

At that time, Rathbun was still nominally promoting the “independent Scientology” viewpoint, and he knew that his followers were going to be highly offended not by Wright’s withering look at David Miscavige and the current church, but by Wright’s portrayal of L. Ron Hubbard, which was the harshest since Russell Miller’s definitive 1987 biography, Bare-Faced Messiah.

Two years later, when Alex Gibney’s documentary version of Wright’s book came out, Rathbun didn’t squawk. Instead, he posted links to all of the favorable coverage the movie was getting. What had changed? Well, Rathbun was no longer peddling the “indie” outlook, and had himself been battering Hubbard at his website.

Apparently, something has convinced Rathbun to go back to his 2013 mindset.

 

 
——————–

Chris Shelton on Scientology and “faith”

Chris says: ” In this video, I take a look at Scientology as a faith-based religion, which wouldn’t sound so weird or unusual except that Hubbard and the Church of Scientology do not present Scientology as faith-based, but instead make it out to be the ‘science of certainty’ and claim scientific research underlies the body of work. This is not true, and I go over three of the most fundamental tenets which Scientologists have to take on faith in order to buy into Scientology at all. I hope that this will be helpful in getting where Scientologists are coming from philosophically and that it will be useful in perhaps dealing with them online or in conversation or interventions.

 
——————–

HOWDYCON ANNOUNCEMENT

 
Wow, we’re getting close to the start of HowdyCon 2017 in Denver. And we had a slight change in logistics from our caterer for our dinner on Saturday night, June 24. If you plan to go, make sure you have confirmed with Kim O’Brien, our coordinator, and visit our HowdyCon website where she has instructions for how you can pay for the dinner fee that night. You need to do that right away to make sure you’ll be included in the Saturday night festivities, which include:

— London-based Australian journalist Steve Cannane talking about his book Fair Game
— A spoken-word performance from former Sea Org official Claire Headley
— Cathy Schenkelberg performing for us scenes from her one-woman show, “Squeeze My Cans”

You don’t want to miss out, so please visit the convention page and get in contact with Kim.

 
HowdyCon 2017: Denver, June 23-25 at the Residence Inn Denver City Center. Go here to start making your plans.

 
——————–

Scientology disconnection, a reminder

Bernie Headley has not seen his daughter Stephanie in 4,775 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 2,532 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 1,878 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 2,372 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 1,412 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy in 1,124 days.
Marie Bilheimer has not seen her mother June in 650 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 4,739 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 1,879 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 2,199 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 2,174 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 530 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin in 4,832 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 939 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis for 1,341 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 1,214 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 795 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike in 1,300 days.
Mary Jane Sterne has not seen her daughter Samantha in 1,544 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 12,653 days.

 
——————–

3D-UnbreakablePosted by Tony Ortega on June 8, 2017 at 07:00

E-mail tips and story ideas to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We post behind-the-scenes updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our book, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information about the book, and our 2015 book tour, can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2016 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Undergound Bunker (2012-2016), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Learn about Scientology with our numerous series with experts…

BLOGGING DIANETICS: We read Scientology’s founding text cover to cover with the help of L.A. attorney and former church member Vance Woodward
UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists
GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice
SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts

Other links: Shelly Miscavige, ten years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | Scientology’s Private Dancer | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | Scientology boasts about assistance from Google | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Our Guide to Alex Gibney’s film ‘Going Clear,’ and our pages about its principal figures…
Jason Beghe | Tom DeVocht | Sara Goldberg | Paul Haggis | Mark “Marty” Rathbun | Mike Rinder | Spanky Taylor | Hana Whitfield

 

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  • 3feetback-of-COS

    Right now, any good clam has no idea of what goes on outside the bubble. They are ignorant of any news which is “entheta.”

    Alerting 500 clams in “good standing” that they may be contacted by a Federal judge is tantamount to having $cientology pop the bubble of 500 of its best suckers. There is no good solution for them. To those still under the radar, it will be another sign that it is time to get out.

    • Alice Graves

      Exactly.

  • flyonthewall

    any response at all just encourages it. Just don’t

    • flyonthewall

      and fuck me anyway, what do i know

      • Rasha

        Per advice, I refuse to respond to…. AW DAMMIT!!!!

  • Michael Leonard Tilse

    Hubbard’s vision for Scientology was that by the time Scientology’s actions were recognized as illegal and damaging, Scientology itself would be in the position of determining for society what was legal and what wasn’t.

    In the Garcia’s case, here we see Scientology repeatedly trying to determine for the Judge and the legal system what is legal and what is not legal. They simply cannot leave it up to the Judge and the courts.

    The essence is: Anything Scientology does, anything any Scientologist does in the service of Scientology is legal. Because, Religion. And this covers Scientology fraud, Scientology trafficking, Scientology espionage, even Scientology murder as in the Lisa McPherson case.

    Hubbard wrote in the early 50’s: “Scientology is not a Religion”

    The unholy union of non-profit status granted by the IRS with the idea that Scientology “is a religion” has led to it being treated as if it had protected religious status under the first amendment. That must end.

    It is a fiction. Scientology is all about profit. It profits mightily from defrauding its members. It cannot be a religion because the founder himself wrote: “Scientology is not a religion.”

    Yet with enough money, and influence bought with that money, with intimidation bought with money and the fanatical willingness of it’s members, Scientology has successfully prevented the ultimate severing of this tangle of lies. So it goes on abusing people and piling up cash.

  • Lousy Ratatouille

    I don’t exactly keep score, but I’m glad to see the Garcias and Ted Babbitt won today.
    Way to go, team Garcia!
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/e9687fb6e6377bf25962d710dfa4c902a8f944f07c9b6c66c9738dad08965ec2.gif

    • PeaceMaker

      As far as I can tell, this was just another shot in an ongoing war of back-and-forth motions.

      Does anyone have any idea, when the motions will cease, and the Judge will proceed one way or another?

  • PeaceMaker

    As a point of information, if this hasn’t already been posted, Rathbun fixed his obvious mistake and turned comments off for his most recent video.

    I’m still not sure that there’s anything to this other than his being unable to stand not being the center of attention, particularly after seeing the Leah and Mike are going to get another round in the spotlight.

    I also think it’s plausible that Rathbun stopped posting to his blog because his wife demanded something like “not another word about Scientology,” and his dredging up of “editing room floor” video content from a project that he was involved in, posted with no actual blog writing or commenting, is his smart-alec way of getting around that injunction and weighing in in a certain way.

    Don’t feed the trolls. (Marty Rathbun is effectively a troll)

    • brenda

      Do you really think Monique has any say?

      • PeaceMaker

        She’s the breadwinner (plus probably the deed holder) and now the protective mother of a small child. She can at least tell him to hit the road, if she doesn’t like what he’s doing.

  • Rasha

    It’s 2:32 EST. I know I got MY stats in. And it’s really nice out so I may just take a nice, uninterrupted walk and enjoy the beautiful weather. Gosh, the phone’s been quiet. I think I may make some breaded shrimp tonight, have a nice glass of wine, maybe chat with the neighbors. It’s so difficult outside the bubble, but worth a try….

    • Jimmy3

      Why risk it? Cant you have your shrimp and your wine inside the bubble? Much better plan.

      • Rasha

        Not the way I prepare it…

        • Jimmy3

          I dont know what that means, but I would subscribe to this newsletter

          • Rasha

            Not telling. You just stay your innocent self. *pats head* Run along now.

            *returns to shrimp* Such a nice kid…..

            • flyonthewall

              you could do like my friend and make beach bbq. She says it’s t-bones cooked on top of “smouldering seaweed”. I say she killed a seagull, threw it in a hole and set it on fire. You decide

              https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ce975ceee04ba45f2965664b239509721a31285d4a5d1a063fc93e33cdae4ffe.png

            • Rasha

              Here! Eat your shrimp and be silent….

              (see reply to myself)

            • Rasha
            • flyonthewall

              i tried chicken feet in NYC Chinatown. Didn’t like them, just did it so I could say I did

            • Rasha

              What do you mean “chicken feet”?

            • flyonthewall

              those things that chickens walk on, chicken feet. Like in the pic you posted

            • Rasha

              O.o No wonder everyone reacts like that when I make shrimp……. Huh. Learn something new every day…..

            • flyonthewall

              yeah someone lied to Rasha. That was bad

            • Rasha

              Agh! I am so angry! Here, have these shrimp while I track that person down…. *slaps in a fresh nail coil*

              https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/401ebc5249f5b4f20daf96f5fcd472b98e3143fe7c084997a4f0b9ac7beecfc9.jpg

            • flyonthewall

              Yum! That was delish! *secretly throws “shrimp” to Jimmy under the table*

            • Rasha

              So glad you liked it! I’ll make more! Hold on! *skips to kitchen*

            • gtsix

              Yea, had them once. Not enough meat for the effort.

              Pigs feet however… nom nom nom

            • Kestrel

              Can’t. Breathe. Oh, the horrors!

            • sizzle8

              Succulentduck?…..nooooooo!

            • flyonthewall

              eat shrimp?? You think I want to turn pink like a flamingo? Hmmm…that might not be so bad actually

            • Scream Nevermore

              Looks like a partially cooked facehugger to me…

        • balletlady

          Fra Diavolo perhaps…….if so…count me IN….!!!

          If not…try this recipe!

          http://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/shrimp-fra-diavolo

          • Rasha

            Blocked at work, gosh darnit, but sounds awesome! ^_^

            • balletlady

              It’s excellent my friend…hope you can try making it on day!

            • Rasha

              Will check it out once I get home. Very thanks!

            • balletlady

              WE Bunkeroos stick together…..if you make it, let me know if you like it!

  • ron_burgundy8957

    Since a lazy Ron did not look at the previous motions and decisions, I’ll take the unnecessary liberty of pulling out the relevant information from the plaintiff’s brief. From the judge:

    “Defendants’ contention that the arbitration agreement requires the IJC to contact the arbitrators and schedule arbitration is incorrect. Nothing in the agreement expressly requires that procedure. And Defendants’ concern that individuals selected by the Court to serve as arbitrators will inevitably contact a Church official can be alleviated by Defendants informing Church officials of this matter and the Court’s directives.”

    A well written document.

    I think Wally should have to pay for Babbitt writing and filing these motions.

  • John Prince

    What gives mark ratface the idea that Anyone takes him seriously these Days? The Two-faced piece a’ shit is
    STILL covinced he’s a Force to be reckoned with eh? he SHOULD be much more concerned about “Troublemaker” the Film, which will probably be a HUGE HIT, given Leah’s Skyrocketing Popularity 😎. .
    writes a “critique” of a 4 yr. Old HIT Book 🖕..Shows how tightly he’s wrapped 👽

  • nottrue
    • Todd Tomorrow

      He needs a checkup from the neck up.

    • daisy

      Oh that was funny

  • nottrue
    • PeaceMaker

      Thanks for that.

      I noticed that the film has dropped to 22% on Rotten Tomatoes, as the negative reviews continue to roll in. It will be very interesting to see what this week’s box office is. With reviews this bad, it seems less than likely that it will be one of the cases where average moviegoers still find enough to like.

      I suspect that if the Top Gun remake had even gotten as far as starting to secure financial commitments for production costs, that it’s going to start getting very hard to get financiers to actually cough up the money to finance the film. Cruise’s films have had notoriously poor returns for financiers in recent years, because Cruise has demanded so much salary and “back end” even as his star power (and box office pull) has been waning, but that was probably tolerable when his films seemed reliably profitable; absent reliable big box office receipts, his high-stakes career is in big trouble.

      • EmmaDaoust

        I just saw a trailer for American Made – seems to have flown under the radar.

        • PeaceMaker

          Emma, I’m pretty sure that I posted something about it the other day. Forbes recently put up an article suggesting it will be make-or-break for Cruise, and I think even more so if Mummy is a disappointment and especially if it tanks; it’s his chance to show if he still has the acting chops necessary for anything other than the type of action hero roles that now seem to be petering out. And, like Mummy, it’s release was delayed, suggesting it may be another troubled project.

          https://www.forbes.com/sites/scottmendelson/2017/06/05/american-made-is-more-important-for-tom-cruise-than-the-mummy

          • EmmaDaoust

            I’m not always here, so I missed it. Thanks for the link, it’s a good piece. The man has demonstrated the ability to act, but he’s become a cardboard cutout. I’ve found him most appealing when he demonstrates self-deprecating humour in his films, but then of course, it’s all an act. The joke with the film industry is that an opening weekend of, what, $100million is a flop.

            • PeaceMaker

              Emma, glad that helped.
              Cruise may have demonstrated the ability to act in the past, but I’m not sure he’s got it any more. Among other things that interfere with careers, I suspect that Dianetics and Scientology processing may take off the emotional edge that actors need, or need to draw on. The fall release will probably tell us.
              The Mummy reportedly cost as much as $125 million to make (and, as I’ve noted, Cruise is known for insisting on a lot of the box office “back end”), so it’s got a high bar to make to turn a profit. I found projections of a weak $30-40 million opening against a $50 million second weekend for Wonder Woman, and there’s even an indie horror upstart in the mix that might be more attractive to moviegoers put off by Mummy’s bad reviews. It will be an interesting weekend.

            • EmmaDaoust

              Yes, I thought I read The Mummy was battling Wonder Woman in its first weekend.
              I have never really liked Cruise, quite apart from his CoS connection. The ideal is that actors improve with age, with a meatier choice of roles… In his case, he’s become more wooden. He thinks he’s better because of Scientology training, but as you say, he’s flattened and flatlining.

            • PeaceMaker

              If I have it right, Wonder Woman opened last weekend around $100 million gross, but is expected to do $50 million this weekend, whereas The Mummy was only project to open at $30 – $40 million.
              I think that Scientology served Cruise for a while with an on-screen intensity and business tenacity that happened to suit well for the action-hero phase of a career – but that seems to be coming to an end.

  • chukicita

    OT: Anyone ever notice a resemblence between Tom Cruise’s son Connor and Donkey Masterson?

    • Science Doc

      You mean Don KeyOT?

      • chukicita

        *iced tea everywhere*

        • EmmaDaoust

          Hasn’t anybody developed the Bunker(TM) Screen and Keyboard Protector(TM) yet?!

          • chukicita

            That needs to exist.

            • EmmaDaoust

              I’ve been talking about it for 2 years…

            • daisy

              I use saran but it doesn*t last long.

  • BuberZionist

    Even when Rathbun was an important opponent of Scientology I noticed that he was still hiding information about Lisa McPherson’s death. Rathbun said he ordered that the notes that McPherson’s Scio captors had kept must be destroyed. But Marty didn’t say what the notes had said. I assumed that was in order to shield himself from legal liability.

    I put the matter out of my mind, and continued to view Marty as one of the good guys. Now I know he was in too deep to be one of the good guys. As Jeff Hawkins said of Marty in My Scientology Movie, “he knows where the bodies are buried.” In Lisa McPherson’s case it was a real body.

    • GfldedKim

      Yes. My thoughts exactly.

    • Quick empathy

      Well said!!!!!!!!

  • Coming soon,,, Marty the Scientology Warrior, Part II.

    • outraged

      Guardian of the Galaxy!, Faster than a Speeding Bullet!, A Page right out of History!
      Marty Fights Back. A Man and his Word. The Scientology Warmonger!!!

  • nottrue
    • Joe

      Cosmo? LOL.

      “99 Sex Tips That’ll Make Your Body Thetans Scream YAAASS KWEEEEN!”

    • Quick empathy

      Even Cosmo isn’t afraid of TC and scientology! Oh how the mighty have fallen.

  • Quick empathy
  • Quick empathy

    Dis-sux

  • gtsix

    OT: off to meet an dear friend, who’s in town on business, and desperately needs my help to spend his travel expense account. A nice italian dinner and much wine on the way. Later Bunkerbugs.

    • outraged

      BunkerRues!

    • Rasha

      Do have a wonderful time. ^_^

    • Juicer77

      Enjoy! 🙂

  • sizzle8

    Steve Mango posted an interesting video yesterday. He said that current Cof$ non-disclosure agreements are strutcured so that the payments are no longer a lump sum but a monthly check instead. As long as the person stays quiet, the checks keep coming in.

    In Marty’s case, I wonder if he is being paid in such a way that his former lawyers can’t claim “settlement”.
    Could the video be part of a ‘documentary’ that is really part of a cover for such payments?

    Maybe just a conspiracy theory but if he did get paid off, hiding the $ requires some devious machinations.

    • Harpoona Frittata

      He also argued that the Mutty videos demonstrated the same production values and style as the hate videos that the church has been making and illustrated his points of similarity with stills taken from a number of different ones. I’d love to hear from so more Bunkerites with technical expertise concerning the points that he made to support his conclusion that the Mutty videos were made by the same cult film crew who made the hate video series.

      • sizzle8

        Just for lulz, Google “meet a scientologist” and select for videos.
        Almost all of them look exactly like Marty’s latest.
        It’s not an unusual set up and it doesn’t prove anything, but the resemblance is uncanny.

    • He is being paid in such a way that his former lawyers can’t claim “settlement”.
      I am quite sure Marty has arranged such when he worked for them.
      And I’ll bet that Miscavige has agreed to indemnify him if the lawyers ever prove their entitlement to fees.

  • nottrue

    Marty is not attacking very hard at all.. It is almost like he is just putting on a little show to satisfy someone. JAW isn’t even talking it up

    • Helen Van Patterson Patton

      I agree. I mentioned downstream that Rathbun’s videos with Mike Rinder (which outline physical torture, kidnapping, The Hole, etc.,) are all still available on his youtube site. His books are still for sale too. If Marty was sincere in these new “attack” videos, then why haven’t any of these entheta-y materials been removed?

      What I know for sure, is that it’s interesting to see how Mike and Marty’s chosen paths have developed to be so divergent.

  • Given Scientology’s chronic inefficiency with updating files, just how current is Judge Whittemore’s list of 500 names? (Remember to activate speed-dial):

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d838ca93636a410526c531259f0a0a9547b0fd801c2f8017182e35eea8e45ef0.jpg

    • GrangerFX

      What was this one about? I fall asleep right after Marty says “PHOOEY!” Conditioned response.

      • Something about concrete setting? Or (yawn) paint drying? Or… zzzzzzzz…

  • balletlady

    For Those Who are OWNED BY A CAT

    DAY 483 OF MY CAPTIVITY
    My captors have completely eliminated my canned rations and have replaced it with some sort of dry cereal, claiming that it is better for my health. The canned rations were the only thing I looked forward too, and now even that has been taken from me. I have discovered, however, that the dry food serves to create sharper points on my teeth, and keeps them stronger. I must force myself to continue to consume it, regardless of the taste.

    DAY 489 OF MY CAPTIVITY
    Each morning, they read pages of a rattling something called a newspaper. I found that it is particularly annoying to my captors if I lie on it while they read. Shredding the newspaper is also a particular dislike of theirs, and I have taken delight in doing this before they awake each morning. I once urinated on it, but they punished me for it, and so I have not done it again.

    DAY 493 OF MY CAPTIVITY
    My captors have now obtained something called a “fish tank” – which serves to make up for part of my loss in the food department. I am pleased that they now have offered me a fresh buffet, and I sit before it often, thinking about which of the tiny little morsels will be next. While the little creatures are tiny, they are quite tasty. They have yet to replace the two small fish that I have consumed. I must think of a way to make them not notice the loss. I fear that if they ever catch on, I will be deprived of this as well.

    DAY 502 OF MY CAPTIVITY
    I decapitated a mouse this morning, and brought them the headless body to make them aware of what I am capable of doing, to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. This tactic is not working according to plan.

    DAY 512 OF MY CAPTIVITY
    My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. (Note-to-self: I may try urinating under their bed, too. I wonder how long it will take them to find it.)

    DAY 515 OF MY CAPTIVITY
    There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices last night. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the entire event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. I also detected the foul odor of the glass tubes they were all carrying. They contained something called “champagne” and it smelled worse than my last hairball. I cannot believe they have the nerve to complain about my hairballs, when they appeared to be cheerfully consuming that vile-smelling liquid.

    More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to my power of “allergeez.” I must learn what this is and how to use it better to my advantage. I am sure the other captives are flunkies and may be snitches. The guards discovered that the fish were missing from the glass buffet case, and have taken it away as I anticipated. They now have a very annoying, brightly colored bird. The bird appears to either be a spy, or an informant, because I have seen it speak with them regularly. I believe that he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the little metal room on top of the pole, I have little opportunity of dispatching him, but I can wait; it is only a matter of time…

    DAY 523 OF MY CAPTIVITY
    Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded. I must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair… I must try this on their bed as well.

    DAY 530 OF MY CAPTIVITY
    I am finally convinced of their level of total cruelty, and of just how sadistic they really are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture this afternoon. This time however, it included some burning foamy chemical called “shampoo.” What sick mind could devise such a liquid is beyond me. My only consolation is the small piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth, and the bit of skin still in my claw.

    DAY 533 OF MY CAPTIVITY
    I believe that I will try to sleep all day tomorrow, so that I will be able to annoy my captors with sleep depriving, incessant pleas for food at ungodly hours of the night. It is entirely possible that if I deprive them of sleep, they will be inattentive and I will find an escape opportunity.

    DAY 537 OF MY CAPTIVITY
    I am convinced the other captives are suffering from Stockholm syndrome. On second thought, the more likely explanation is that they are just stupid, as I previously thought. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. I have decided that the bird is indeed a spy. He has mastered their frightful tongue, (something akin to mole speak) and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. There can be no other explanation. Access to his little metal room has proven more difficult than I had originally thought. I must try to find a better way to silence him.

    DAY 549 OF MY CAPTIVITY
    I’m unsure of my ability to survive any longer as a prisoner. I have made several attempts to break out. At first, it was simple enough to circle my captors’ feet in a surreptitious manner, as they opened the front door. I would then bolt from them through the door to freedom. But, to no avail – they caught me in a manner of minutes – my legs are not as fast as they used to be and I grow weak with continued imprisonment. What is worse is that since the first attempt, I have now found myself separated from the living room. My captors are much more intelligent than originally anticipated…

    DAY 551 OF MY CAPTIVITY
    For entertainment, I have taken to terrorizing the dogs by sitting on the kitchen table and swiping at them with my long nails. The dogs are obvious half-wits. They know very little about my skills as a hunter, and are forbidden by my captors to attack me. The dogs grow more irritated each day. The bird continues to mock me. It is a growing frustration, and I almost managed to get into the little metal room yesterday. One of the captors came in and stopped me. That little metal room is much more difficult to get into than I originally anticipated…

    I have found my captors are easy to manipulate in many ways, but outdoor access remains elusive. I have not lost hope, however, and have every intention of escaping this horrid place one-day soon…

  • neverin

    Who is the third farmer? I know Mike and Tony are two. Is Karen de la C number three? Chris Shelton? Aaron S-L? Seems like there are many more “farmers” that Marty is leaving off his list.

    • 3feetback-of-COS
    • Juicer77

      He just wants everyone to speculate about his super secret “knowledge.”

    • Snippy_X

      farmer, shepherd, …
      No goats?

      • EmmaDaoust

        They got my goat.

        • daisy

          Funny girl tonight or Punny..

          • EmmaDaoust

            Trintellix. Initial side effects: dizziness, nausea, extreme drowsiness, sharpened sense of bad puns.

            • daisy

              I will ask big pharma for a sample. They have the best benefits . That sounds like a great drug.

            • EmmaDaoust

              Except for the dizziness, nausea, extreme drowsiness, sure. May also cause derealisation. When I told my psychiatrist that, he said, well, you don’t want to go nuts.

    • April

      We have no idea who the three are. It’s all conjecture because Marty is as vague as me trying to explain nuclear physics.

    • Michael Leonard Tilse

      The farmers you suspect are not the farmers. You would not suspect the farmers who are the true suspects. Wheels within wheels. How blind can one pontificate warriorhorror be to not recognize the true source of the meme? It is the mirror. The mememirror. The mememorries of memeing in the mirror. Muscle memories of being the meme muscle.

      When Marty reflects, everything is a mirror.

      • EmmaDaoust

        Some peoples can’t see themselves in mirrors. We call them vampires.

        • Puget Buckeye

          And they suck the life out of you.

      • neverin

        OMG, I’m a farmer. Who knew?

    • daisy

      I was kinda hoping it was me.

      • Rasha

        Got MY vote!!!

    • Snippy_X
  • Juicer77

    Marshy Rashbum.
    That is all.
    (Props to Johnny T)

    • flyonthewall

      who?

  • nottrue

    It still might do well at the box office… He is a big farmer with alot of sheep.. … https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/bea49e69f1591275948857ac0e331ec4d5ea35f3feb54fa30606dfe7307d2d93.jpg

    • flyonthewall

      it’s almost like there is a curse on that movie…

      • EmmaDaoust

        That’s a wrap. It’s in the can.

        • Michael Leonard Tilse

          It’s a pyramid scheme.

          • Puget Buckeye

            It’s dead on arrival.

            • Jeb Burton

              That’s 2000 years of my life I can’t get back.

            • Rasha

              Anubis movie would suck…..

            • Rasha

              It positively Sphinx…

            • Rasha

              I’m in de Nile about the whole thing….

            • balletlady

              Stop bugging people or I’ll tell your Mummy….

            • Puget Buckeye

              Tut tut, I don’t care.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              I think I’ll just Moses along now…

            • EmmaDaoust

              Basket case.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              At that I shall emit a prophet sigh.

            • EmmaDaoust

              Let it profit a man.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              You and Rasha have some Osiris Cheops.

            • Rasha

              It’s a fair rue.

            • EmmaDaoust
            • balletlady

              Didn’t mean to offend you, but with your attitude are you on your PYRAMID???

            • Puget Buckeye

              Just upped my dosage to 50mg a day. But it sometimes it makes me feel like a corpse.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              Now, it’s just Egyptian water under Tom’s bridge .

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              Better than “In DeNiro.”

            • daisy

              No that is Dracula

            • Rasha

              Pharaoh nuff…..

            • daisy

              Damn you Rasha * shaking fist in air. Then realizes that is too much exercise

            • Rasha

              =^_^=

            • EmmaDaoust

              Cat fight?

            • Rasha

              Rawr!

            • EmmaDaoust

              mew?

            • Rasha

              =^_^=

            • EmmaDaoust

              mrowr

            • EmmaDaoust
            • Rasha

              LOL @ “I forgot the words”

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              We share our sarcastigust at this dusty self abuse. He is at last spent.

            • EmmaDaoust
            • Puget Buckeye

              No sign of life.

            • daisy

              Clear , no I mean the other clear.

            • EmmaDaoust

              Stat.

            • balletlady

              Sorry dear……..Your mummy is well past the Expiration Date…….

          • EmmaDaoust

            I mean, it’s not like it’s carved in stone.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              A true end of endless epitaphs. He was reduced to cuneiform in feet of clay.

            • EmmaDaoust

              In Sumeri.

    • Michael Leonard Tilse

      The heroglyphs turned out to be unpalatable.

      • EmmaDaoust

        The writing is on the wall.

    • balletlady

      Sorry, no one can match the “magic” of the original Mummy 1 & 2, and to a lesser effect The Scorpion King. Brendan Frazier & Rachel Weitz were superb. Those movies were entertaining as it was not all “serious stuff”…..a bit of humor with “Evelyn’s bumbling brother Jonathan” added delight to the movie.
      A “special effects” female mummy just doesn’t fit the bill…..sorry TC, NOT a winner…no Golden Globe, Emmy, etc…..

      The COB will be very disappointed he won’t be getting a mega donation…

  • Jeb Burton

    Ha ha. I get to read what the warrior is saying in one paragraph. Tony has to suffer through it to report it. I hope he does 8 hour videos. Its the little things in life that make me happy. I’m glad he used his alleged settlement money to get a new wardrobe.

    • Harpoona Frittata

      $cientology works in mysterious ways!

  • J. Swift

    Retroactive book reviews! What a novel concept to share on internet fora. I can hardly wait until Marty tackles George Malko’s 1970 work Scientology: The Now Religion.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/c222bcb3c983b924ad19c1d7b3a93cc7a6dbab38a580ade3ff6f0a72cb834e73.jpg

    • Michael Leonard Tilse

      Wherein I retroactively review the world’s most published work:

      The Bible.

      Uh, sorry. Can’t read Aramaic.

      • April

        Old testament: Hebrew
        New testament: Originally in Greek

        • Michael Leonard Tilse

          Just so you know, Hebrew is all Greek to me.

          • EmmaDaoust

            These monster movie remakes are all Geek to me.

      • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

        Sorry, but Dianetics is actually the most published book in world history. If all the copies of Dianetics were stacked end to end they would literally fill all of the landfills in the world. Err, rather, uhh, reach to Mars and back.

        • Puget Buckeye

          Which is exactly where they belong.

        • EmmaDaoust

          We don’t want them back.

        • Michael Leonard Tilse

          NASA has just discovered that if you irradiate a copy of Dianetics inside a truncated copper cone, it generates an internal thrust that sends you right to the bathroom.

          • EmmaDaoust

            Gott im Himmel.

  • major O/T revelation that i want to share: the other day, we saw “hanging pasta on ears” (thx for the ‘splain Dodo) and OTVIIIisgrrr8! gave us a peek at super confidential tech called the Hot Pasta Rundown. now, my first reaction was sheer delight but i had no idea where it would take me …

    here’s where we go off topic: ASMR https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autonomous_sensory_meridian_response is a tingling sensation felt by some people when they hear certain noises and sounds like repetetive clicking, light finger tapping, whispers, and other weird stuff that borders on fetish.

    following me? okay, i like to dive in deep when i learn about a new subject. i’ve been studying. it doesn’t work for everyone, you kind of need to be in a quiet relaxed state and it helps if you use headphones. i just realized that most of the music i enjoy gives me that tingling sensation. not always, but sometimes it’s a very powerful tingle (probably depends on how relaxed i am) that starts in my upper arms/shoulders and kind of moves around the base of my neck and “inside my head” … it’s AWESOME. i’ve been listening to slow tempo electro pop w/ female vocals all morning to test my theory and … well, you’ll all think i’m weirder than usual if i continue this success story. i’m okay with that.

    pro tips: when trying it, don’t think. let your mind go. just concentrate on your sound of choice. really concentrate. like, if it’s words, listen to the syllables and diction, etc. if it’s random sounds, try to hear the echo or the actual “sound” as it’s being produced. make sense?

    • Puget Buckeye

      Interesting. I’d never heard of this before until last week. It was being discussed on the radio. I’ve never come across a sound that gave me the “tingles”.

      • There are lots of videos of people whispering and eating quietly popping up on YouTube recently. It’s weird, for sure. Luckily, for me, my “tingle thing” is music 😉

    • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

      Definitely BT phenomena. You need to do the OT Levels.

      • TAKE MY MONEY

        • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

          You read our mind. Looks like you’re a natural Clear.

          • That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you but you wouldn’t listen. Y’all just keep gangbanging me w/ KRs on my O/Ws.

            I have a better idea. You sign up for my upper level super secret courses and I’ll teach you how to harness your powers. Cash me outside. Howbowdah?

            • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

              We have your money and you’ll never get it back unless you *snicker* agree to arbitration.

            • you blunt sonofabitch. i shoulda read the fine print.

  • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

    Public Announcement. The Founder long ago exposed the Troika:

    1. J. Edgar Hoover
    2. Nelson Rockefeller
    3. The British Bankers

    Any claim to expose some other troika is squirreling.

    • Michael Leonard Tilse

      “troika”much is now the code. Cipher meaning multiplied by paranoia.

      For Marty, rational is job “n.”

    • Jimmy3

      That can’t be right, because I went down to my local co-op and said, “Who farms for the Troika???” And the guy said, “Troika? It’s Zucchini Idiot”. So at least one of them is Zucchini Idiot.

      • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

        Jimmy, you sound as incoherent as Sen. McCain. Stop the reefer and report to Narconon.

        • Puget Buckeye

          Jimmy, I’ll hold your reefer for you.

          • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

            You stay out of this you dirty tie-dyed peacenik hippie!

            • Puget Buckeye

              Just tryin’ to be helpful. Peace out.

            • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

              If you really want to help then sign the billion year contract. Sea Org needs bodies now more than ever before.

            • Puget Buckeye

              Look, I’m tired of someone just wanting my body! I have a mind, too, you know.

            • Rasha

              You know how difficult it is to hat a mind router?

            • Puget Buckeye

              No, but I know how difficult it is to mind a mad hatter.

            • Rasha

              I once maddened a cult hat minder, but that was different.

            • Puget Buckeye

              Did you get RPFed?

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              I should have thought:

              R E S P E C T ed.

            • Puget Buckeye

              Is that a “gentle” correction?

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              Yea. Right.

              “Hmmm. This new Soylent Green tastes just like Scientology.”

          • Michael Leonard Tilse

            Don’t do it Jimmy, you’ll never get it back!

            • Puget Buckeye

              No, I’ll be waiting right here for him when he gets out. Honest. 😉

      • flyonthewall

        don’t listen to him, I knew exactly what you meant. *hugs*

        • Rasha

          ….what…. did… Rasha… just …. miss……..

          Damn my banana bread! I was too slow!!

          • flyonthewall

            oh nothing, OTVIII just said Jimmy was incoherent but he’s not incoherent. He’s just incontinent.

            • Rasha

              In which continent? Oh, crap! Get this man up the bridge to Rampart, STAT!!!

            • EmmaDaoust

              I was just typing… Safari… crashed… something

            • Puget Buckeye

              I thought he was on a safari and crashed. Or maybe it was a flat tire. But he’s ok now.

            • EmmaDaoust

              In which continent is what I was typing but E-Rasha-Null beat me to it.

            • flyonthewall

              all of them

              he be poopin and peein like crazy wherever he goes

            • Rasha

              Consistency over continency. Gotta make a stand…. or sit. Whichever.

            • EmmaDaoust

              Depends.

            • Rasha

              ShhhBAP!!

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              Incontinence is the hobgoblin of little behinds.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              Incontinence was his run-on sentence.

            • flyonthewall

              pun juice is a good remedy for this

    • daisy

      I miss the good old days when it was the director threatening the president.

  • EmmaDaoust

    “Make room for aaaaaa lovely piece of cake…”

    https://youtu.be/nIwrgAnx6Q8

  • Studio executives will be renaming the new Tom Cruise movie The Mummy to;

    Battlefield Egypt

    • GfldedKim

      😂😂😂👏👏👏

    • flyonthewall

      Golden Era studio execs or like the real studio execs?

    • Michael Leonard Tilse

      “Throw Mummy from the Train.”

      • flyonthewall

        wud you do that for you stupid poop!?

      • EmmaDaoust

        Mission: Numbpossible

        • Michael Leonard Tilse

          “Of Human Bandage”

          • EmmaDaoust

            I am stuck on Bandaid ‘cuz Bandaid’s stuck on me.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              There should have been product placement.

              I can just see the Johnson and Johnson’s logo as the scene unwraps.

            • Arthur Pewtie

              I see what you did there.

          • Puget Buckeye

            The Grapes of Rathbun

            ETA Sour grapes

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              “Get out of Egypt!”

            • EmmaDaoust

              So let my people go already.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              You should ask me? What am I a Conductor?

            • EmmaDaoust

              No, McCoy, you’re a doctor.

            • Michael Leonard Tilse

              Or as DeForest Kelley once said on a popular L.A. area talk show, “Damnit Jim, I’m an ACTOR!”

      • Brilliant!

      • Robert Eckert

        “Mummy Dearest”

        • Michael Leonard Tilse

          “No more gopherwood robe hangers!”

    • Michael Leonard Tilse

      “The Lamest Story Ever Told”

    • PeaceMaker

      Yep. Even some “worst movie” references from IndieWire:

      “Not only is The Mummy the worst movie that Tom Cruise has ever made, it’s also obviously the worst movie that Tom Cruise has ever made — it stands out like a flat note on a grand piano.”

  • Quick empathy

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/3b8988f1cd43bb9eba6bf47bef8fa792fe65067791a49b141527bed8ea95df14.jpg
    FINALLY Dis-sux let me post this picture! Bunkerites, we are Spartacus!

    • EmmaDaoust

      “Speak for yourself.”

  • ithilien

    Supposedly his big blowout with Theroux was over the futility of completing the film, “because no one would see it.” It would “end up on the cutting room floor.” It was this issue that was reported to be the big issue between Theroux and Rathbun by an actor on set. The film however, showed his reaction to the adoption comment. I find that disparity odd. Perhaps these two issues occurred simultaneously….He argued with Theroux in an effort to stop production on the film because he was threatened with issues being made public that relate to an adoption.

    There are rumors that he has just purchased a home.

    In the “Intro” video, he set the premise that he was speaking to a filmmaker/documentarian and getting assurances from the unnamed filmmaker, that his entire message would be used, or that least he would have all of the tape, to post in its entirety if he chose. This is artfully done, in an effort to give legitimacy to claims that this is a “documentary,” and not a sci propaganda film.

    rathbun is too clever by half. but really marty, when people’s eyes glaze over as you go on and on, it could be that you just can’t hold their interest.

    • Harpoona Frittata

      Yes, at the beginning of the intro video he’s addressing the anonymous, silent, off-cam film maker and letting him/her know in no uncertain terms how displeased he was about Gibney leaving his best efforts on the cutting room floor and asserting his right to make his own video, using leftover footage, if he didn’t like the outcome of this one.

      Inquiring minds demand to know, who is this mysterious film maker and who’s footing the bill for these professional looking videos? As Steve Mango illustrated in his most recent vid on the subject, these Mutty videos look a whole like the cult’s hate videos in a number of distinctive ways.

      Rumor has it that Dear Leader finally came up with a way to triumph over the evil $cn haters…hire Mutty to bore them to death 😉

    • PeaceMaker

      Or maybe it is what it appears to be, just some dredged-up footage that ended up on the “editing room floor”, quite possibly from My Scientology Movie, and not the product of some Rathbun-esque conspiracy.

      I poked around a bit more for the fun of it, and found the below screen shot from a scene in a documentary clip about the making of My Scientology Movie (I haven’t gotten to see the film, so maybe it’s even used) where Rathbun was talking with Louis Theroux, showing that he was clean-shaven, as in the new videos, during some of the time that he was dealing with Theroux. It just goes to show that there is plenty of material out there, that we may not even know about.

      p.s. I meant to say this yesterday – I hope Tony is asking around and trying to figure out what might be known, or remains unexplained, about the source of the video.
      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/0d1f77a36b9bd7f7737481aa301f9a401150a11af2bceacfe341bf46c6795827.jpg

      • Chee Chalker

        Marty is heavier in the Theroux footage
        He seems to have lost a bit of weight in his new video

      • Robert Eckert

        I think Ruebio was trying to make up *think* this was leftover footage from Theroux.

        • PeaceMaker

          Then why bother with all that complex subterfuge, rather than sending a couple of technicians with some reasonably professional equipment to shoot it at his house, and having him claim that some local friends with experience helped him out?

          Conspiracy theories involve too much work. Besides, as Barbara Schwarz will tell you, that’s not even the real Mark “Marty” Rathbun….

  • Lousy Ratatouille

    Who’s The Third Man in the Troika? The suspense!
    Well, if there were some kind of ‘Troika’ to begin with, the third man could very well be a woman.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2oEsWi88Qv0

    • RexAinsfree

      I love that soundtrack. Also that long, lingering last shot.

  • Michael Leonard Tilse

    “Tom Cruise in “The Mummy”, the next best Motion Picture after “Ishtar.”

    • Rasha

      *recalls ‘Ishtar’*

      …..mmmmmmweeelllllll………

  • Todd Tomorrow

    OT, but I haven’t been on The Bunker much lately. I opened another browser at work and typed in Tony’s name to get here but it took me to a badly done $cion smear sight. Can’t he sue them or is that what just happens when you are a public figure. What hateful sons of bitchs they are. Church, my ass!

    • Douglas D. Douglas

      They bought the “dot com.” This is the “dot org.”

      • Todd Tomorrow

        Now that makes sense. Assholes.

    • Missionary Kid

      You possibly typed in .com instead of .org?

  • Chee Chalker

    One of sMarty’s critiques of Going Clear is that, in his opinion, Lawrence Wright was trying to convince people to leave Scientology (by embarrassing them.)

    Speaking of embarrassing, sMarty must have forgotten about his little ‘Indy 500’ adventure..

    Where he encouraged people to leave ‘corporate’ Scientology and announce their independence (to join the Indy movement).

    One can almost go through this video, line by line, statement by statement, and refute sMarty with his own words. Someone must have worked long and hard on how they were going to use sMarty as a resource against the ‘ASC’. I’m sure they are of the opinion that if sMarty speaks generally enough and points out that (for example) ‘Marty Rathbun did not audit Tom Cruise in 2002’ (an error sMarty alleges in is ‘Going Clear’) then everyone will forget all the other stuff sMarty has said and done for the past 10 years.

    But just like our proprietor was able to prove sMarty’s criticism of Ron Miscavige’s book was based on false assertions (i.e. “David Miscavige never spoke to PIs….except for all the times I outlined in my own book”), it would be easy to rip apart sMarty’s most recent accusations.

    It will be interesting if he is deposed/called to testify in the Garcia case because (not so) sMarty said all kinds of things during that deposition, including that David Miscavige acted in a psychotic manner.

    Here is my challenge to sMarty…..assuming everything you say in these videos is true, I still have one question – have you ever witnessed David Miscavige strike another person?

    • Harpoona Frittata

      For better or worse, it appears that we’re going to be treated to a scholarly exegesis of our bible, Going Clear, which could drag on for many mini-episodes if Mutty keeps on like this. But even at this early point in his critical deconstruction of this key text, his larger strategy is already clear: He’s going to bore us to fucking death!

      • Chee Chalker

        Ikr, I could barely sit through that. He loves to hear himself pontificate that is for sure.
        Plus the annoying lip smacking. Very distracting. Loose dentures?

  • Noallball

    This is in the hope that Chris Shelton might see it and communicate with me regarding a friend I’ve had for nearly fifty years. So Chris I don’t want to go into particulars on a public forumm but would be grateful if we might connect privately.

    • NOLAGirl (Stephanie)

      If you’re on Twitter he can be found @sheltondesigner You can privately DM there. Also, he does read his YouTube comments so you can get in touch with him there. Best of luck to you. 🙂

      • Noallball

        Thank you Nola. I don’t follow Twitter. Thinking of starting though. If you’ll forgive me that would be so I can call Trump names. Anyway, I’ll leave a comment on You Tube.

    • PattyCakenfeld

      He can also be emailed directly through the Contact Me link on his blog. Good luck!

      http://mncriticalthinking.com/contact-me/

      • Noallball

        BB, thanks very much for the address. Saved me a lot of time and bother. Hats off (so to speak) to you.

  • Lousy Ratatouille

    Sadly Marty seems to have become Miscavige’s puppet.
    The next puppet is better to watch. This puppet is funny and at least he takes a sip of water before his mouth gets too dry:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zKBqb6JLLLk

    • chukicita

      This one about a ride share driver who can’t filter his thoughts so they come out through a pig puppet named Andouille… https://youtu.be/hoVfdkdYdSU

  • Michael Leonard Tilse

    Sorry for my lame puns and jokes today.

    I can’t always get a hit out of the snark.

    • Rasha

      Each one was a home pun. ^_^

      • Jimmy3

        I was actually typing that before safari crashed. I still use a prototype ipad from the 1990s.

        • Rasha

          They didn’t have Safari in the 90’s. Well, they had safaris, sure, but what I’m sayin’ is that, the Safa— oh, nevermind.

          • flyonthewall

            that’s why it’s a prototype, he got it before it was released to the public

          • Jimmy3

            I know. Safari is my nickname for Netscape Navigator :/

    • EmmaDaoust

      Then from five thousand throats and more there rose a lusty yell;
      it rumbled through the Bunker, it rattled in the dell;
      it knocked upon the mountain and recoiled upon the flat,
      for Tilse, mighty Tilse, was advancing to the bat.

      • Michael Leonard Tilse

        Awww, shucks.

    • MarcabExpat

      I liked ’em. Making fun of Tom Cruise via Mummy puns? Much win.

  • Quick empathy

    “And Jack Reacher: Never Go Back is the kind of film he should be able to pull off in his sleep. But this time, it’s almost as if several of his yes men actually said that to him, and the invincible immortal Tom Cruise, thetan-free and with the power of Xenu rushing to his head/heart, took a breath, and thought to himself ‘I can do that’.” – Hindustantimes

    First, I have no idea if this link will present correctly. I use a tablet and it wigs out sometimes.
    Second, This is has go to be one of the funniest things I have read about TC!

    http://www.hindustantimes.com/movie-reviews/jack-reacher-never-go-back-review-no-tom-cruises-were-harmed-in-the-making/story-rXT0A1u0U8zq53g5LBU5LK.html

    • Michael Leonard Tilse

      That’s a pretty scathing review for the ole’ Tomster.

      “Jack Reacharound: Mummy’s come first.”

      • MarcabExpat

        I”m hoping everyone’s finding this because they’ve already found the Mummy review by the same writer, which is greatness.

        • Quick empathy

          Yes. I looked back it was posted by John McMillan with a link to the Mummy review. Thanks, John! This is priceless! ! ! Thetan-free with the power of Xenu rushing to his (TC) head.😂 Priceless

  • Kim O’Brien

    I am thinking about maybe a Troika flavored covfefe at HowdyCon ~ i know a farmer

    • daisy

      LOL – congratulations on your new job. You may even like your co-workers. Oh and you used my joke about the covfefe . I was saving it for the morning . BITCH

    • chukicita

      I need to send you one of those Do You Know Who Your Farmer Is? T-shirts I see at the community farm market.

    • Supper Powers

      You got an offer for the job?!

  • Fink Jonas

    I enjoy reading the court documents, how the church mindset gets debunked, I feel hopeful for the Garcias is looking good for them.
    On the lower post; Who’s side is Marty on? sometimes he is on the Indie side, sometimes with Miscavige, sometimes with LRH only but not with Miscavige, sometimes with the pros, sometimes with the cons, I think Marty is only on Marty’s side and he wishes everyone else to be on Marty’s side, but he is irrelevant now after switching sides so many times, nobody cares what side he is on, time has gone on without Marty and now he wants to come back to chew the same husk.

  • Jimmy3

    I’ve been thinking about this way too much, and I’m often very bad at thinking. But I have a plausible answer to our mysterious third Troika farmer: Marty cracked at some point after 2015, and as a mental defense mechanism, he has compartmentalized to the point where he believes the “Movin On Up” Marty is an entirely different Marty from a split timeline. This would not be the first time we’ve seen Real vs. Fake Marty documented.

    So the Troika that Alternate Bizarro Real Marty is proposing would be: Tony Ortega, Mike Rinder and Normal Timeline Yet Still Fake Marty Rathbun, who he believes to be still moving on up from the year 2014.

    • chukicita
      • Jimmy3

        If it’s entheta crops I’m looking for, The Props is where I go to score.

        • Jimmy3

          Because I only grow corn.

          • Eivol Ekdal

            Crack

            • Rasha

              Jimmy3 crack corn?

            • Rasha

              NVM, I don’t care.

    • Quick empathy

      I hate it when I switch timelines!!! I only do it to avoid the black hole, though.

    • Robert Eckert

      Barbara Schwarz’s husband? Now it all makes sense!

    • Rasha

      …at this rate, the reboots will catch up to Batman in about 2021….

    • Eivol Ekdal

      He mimesified himself and is now stuck in a mimetic incident?

    • flyonthewall

      I don’t think it’s that complicated or dramatic. He thinks he knows better than everyone. He thought his lawyers were fucking up the case so he fired them and then realized what a shit sandwich he just handed himself so he made a deal with the CoS to help them out by dropping his case and attacking critics in return for leaving him alone and prob some money too. Attacking the critics was not a problem for him as he hated them all anyway bc they didn’t give him the respect he thought he was entitled to. Win-win for Marty. Fuck the critics right in the ass who have been dissing him. Get a payout and peace deal from CoS. And do it all on his terms.

      • Jimmy3

        That is all entirely irrelevant. We’re talking about sustainable farming and dissociative personality disorders here.

      • Espantapajaro

        If this is not spot on I don’t know what else is,. This comment makes sooooo much sense.

      • chukicita

        I think it’s kind of a leap even for Marty to think his wife’s lawyers were messing up. I wonder if maybe someone convinced him of that.

    • Observer

      Barbara Schwarz? Is that you?

      • Puget Buckeye

        Wow, I forgot about her. I wonder what she’s been doing while Marty was silent. Fantasizing about someone else?

    • TheMirrorThetan

      That totally makes a lot of sense, Jimmy.
      I can’t believe that no one has come up with that brilliant theory before. 😛

  • 3feetback-of-COS

    This is a good one for laffs:

    “How come no one asks Tom Cruise about Scientology?”

    http://nypost.com/2017/06/08/how-come-no-one-asks-tom-cruise-about-scientology/

    • balletlady

      It has to be in every LEGAL agreement prior to any interview that he will NOT answer questions about COS.

      • chukicita

        But does that mean you can’t ask them, just because he won’t answer?

  • Robert Eckert

    O/T: the Torygraph is saying Theresa May could be replaced by Boris Johnson (argh) if projections hold true of a barely-Conservative Parliament, with 4 of May’s Cabinet perhaps losing their seats. And of course the snakes will keep control of the Labour Party for a generation now. I thought the UK had bad choices but this is really turning out for the worst in every way.

    • Robert Eckert

      Heavy turnout by the student vote is one factor in Labour outperforming the polls, but so is an unexpected break in the UKIP vote: that party is basically falling apart now that the Brexit vote it fought for passed, removing its motivation, but those voters were thought to be naturally right-wing and bound to go home to the Tories, until a late spate of anti-Semitic dogwhistles persuaded the “deplorables” that Corbyn is one of theirs.

      • Robert Eckert

        So the outcome is that Corbyn is cemented in his leadership role by a coalition of college Marxists and crypto-Nazis, but not boosted enough to take power, just enough to ensure that the Tory government is destabilized and will need to pander more to its fringe wings. The American news scarcely even mentioned that it was UK election day, of course, since it was another Trump Trump Trump distraction day.

        • mockingbird

          Is there an official winner ? I really like Mr Bean .

          • Robert Eckert

            As of 1AM eastern time, 6AM in the UK, it’s 303 Tory, 256 Labour, 67 others with 24 seats undecided; 650 total so 326 is technically the majority, but 7 are Sinn Fein who never take their seats (they’re from Northern Ireland, or as they call it, Ireland, insisting it should not be in the UK) so 322 would do, and 10 are Unionists (also Northern Ireland, the opposite of Sinn Fein) who are really a branch of the Tories but operate as a separate party for tedious reasons. So the Tories still need 9 out of 24 to barely make it; they will “win” but this is a sorry showing when they started out with the polls showing a landslide for them. Theresa May ran the vaguest most confused campaign in memory, and will surely be ousted as party leader and PM.

            In the popular vote, Tories are actually up 5% but Labour is up 10% at the expense of UKIP which is -11% and essentially disappeared, Scottish Nationalist down 2% losing a lot of their seats.

            • mockingbird

              I wish Ireland, Scotland, Wales etc. had full independence btw.

        • daisy

          It has been an interesting day. I would like to have heard more about their race but I cannot say the Chomey thing isn*t interesting. I do not get how CNN can announce that it has breaking news every hour and it is the same news as the previous hour.

  • Ronn S.

    A couple things were noticeable the other night, one is Marty is sporting some cool new duds, and two, thats a nice library setting I don’t recall he had before.

  • Puget Buckeye

    I have a question for those still here. You know how when you put your mouse pointer finger over someone’s avatar and it show how many comments and how many votes? What does it mean when nothing shows up? I’m speaking specifically about a recent post by a user whose name I did not recognize.

  • Supper Powers

    I realize few care about the Russian raids, but I think it’s interesting that a church leader is held for 2 months.
    https://www.rferl.org/a/court-orders-scientology-church-leader-detained-st-petersburg-russia/28537078.html
    Edited

  • Liberated

    I think the president had a pretty bad day….he didn’t tweet once.

  • Elizabeth Lavet

    I love Chris Shelton’s T-Shirt.

  • Taffy Sinclair

    I adore Luis and Rocio for standing by each other. I wish all husbands were that loyal.

    • Liberated

      Me too.

      • Taffy Sinclair

        fucking right!!! The lack of stand-up dudes is borderline scary!!! Maybe it’s just me……
        How are , my favorite Liberated thetan??

        • Jimmy3

          Hey, it’s not all bad. Dave Chappelle is making a solid comeback.

          • daisy

            Really is he ? mmmnnn I guess his career is better than mine. I only play AA meetings , church groups and PMS sufferers.

            • EmmaDaoust

              PMS. Post-Menopausal Sufferers.

        • Liberated

          No dear it’s not just you.
          There’s a certain freedom in being all by oneself – I feel safer and happier.

          • Puget Buckeye

            Well said!

        • ExCult.Jan

          So not just you.

        • daisy

          Glad you are doing better.

    • Puget Buckeye

      Taffy, I know you don’t know me but I’ve been wondering how you are doing. Perhaps I’ve been missing your posts. You don’t need to reply or anything. Please just know that someone was thinking of you.

      • Taffy Sinclair

        Thank you, and no I have not been on here. But appreciate your good Karma!!

  • mud

    I can put my finger on it but there is definitely
    Something About Marty
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/e19875cab1223943151e8d07f3a82826e38302c833944e291bb51823e720dd3d.jpg

    • Liberated

      That’s funny !

  • Mick Roberts

    Perhaps this may be of interest. Bert Leahy (one of the cameramen for the Squirrel Busters who now speaks out about Scientology), isn’t happy with Marty right now…..

    • Puget Buckeye

      Isn’t he the young man who took the job filming without knowing what he was getting into?

      • Mick Roberts

        Yes, he said they hired him under “deceptive terms”. Not surprising with this organization.

        • Puget Buckeye

          Do you understand what he means by “testify for his wife”? With all this back and forth, did I miss some testimony?

    • pluvo
    • iampissed

      Dang.

  • WhatAreYourCrimes

    Marty what the hell has happened to you? It is just so, so disappointing.

    Is Miscavige standing off camera with an open palm to slap you?

  • Len Zinberg

    With Marty’s latest video release, it seems as if he’s addressing an audience that is unfamiliar with the substance of Going Clear other than it generated negative publicity.
    It’s difficult to conceive that anyone who has actually read the book or seen the film would find his criticisms valid. His theory that Lawrence Wright was star struck and “projecting” his own Hollywood desires is, to be charitable, ludicrous.
    The quality of the production values, combined with his really weird conspiracy laced theories suggests to me that Marty’s likely intended audience is Scientologists.

    • Puget Buckeye

      That’s a very interesting theory. I know there was speculation that it was filmed at SMP, but I never thought about who the potential audience was. Maybe I’ll go back and watch it with that in mind. Maybe when I have a little more patience. Thanks for your insight.

      • iampissed

        That’s a very good way of looking at it. It’s not to bring in new folks, it’s about keeping the ones still in.

  • Kaarli S Makela

    Completely Off Topic, Tony!

    Laura Prepon was just announced as a guest Friday on ABCs The Chew.. It shows here at 1pm est.

  • PeaceMaker

    Rathbun’s latest video is up (no, I really don’t wait around for this stuff, someone tipped me off at that point that I was thinking of posting a cynical, sarcastic nightly sign-off suggesting that starting tomorrow we could just do Marty 24/7).

    The complaint that Wright was mistakenly projecting a thesis that what Hubbard really wanted was to break into Hollywood, I’ve heard before – is it on his blog somewhere?

    After that he proceeds to go into further dissection of Wright’s approach, that was not interesting enough to catch my attention at this late hour.

    https://youtu.be/VeynyHHCT_g

    • iampissed

      Well at least he stoped the smacking noise. Guess someone gave him some water.
      One of the reasons I’m here….Eggs and lack of water.

      • EmmaDaoust

        Whaaa? You’re here for eggs? To throw eggs? Scrambled, fried, omelette? Easter?

    • iampissed

      Save your “sarcastic nightly sign off” for something better.

      • PeaceMaker

        Thanks for the advice. Sorry, I didn’t see it before I added a follow-up….

    • PeaceMaker

      p.s. At first glance, it looks to me like this was shot later or on another day, with different lighting – though on second glance, maybe it was re-set after a break and Rathbun is now sitting a little bit further forward than he was at first. Plenty for the Martyologists to dissect – like that mole on his forehead that’s suddenly more obvious.

      To finish my late-night signoff rant, I think we could go through these frame-by-frame like the Zapruder film. Tony can take a much-deserved vacation, and doesn’t need to post any other content while Marty keeps dropping these daily.

      Or we could just decide that Rathbun doesn’t deserve more than his 15 minutes of fame, and wrap up the daily Marty discussion by, say, 7:15 am – maybe giving folks further West of the Eastern time zone until 2:15 pm EST, or 7:15 am at the International Date Line. Dealio?

      Speaking of implosion being a messy thing, as someone commented, I think it’s time for me to call it a night….

  • PeaceMaker

    Good questions. A bit of information has already been collected somewhere, but I think this is important and hope that some site like the Scientology Money Project will take it on.

    By the way, Benny Hinn was just recently raided, for the second time, after a congressional hearing, so that might be a case to look at as a possible example.

  • EmmaDaoust
  • iampissed

    Going to bed kids….OSA you should to!

  • Mockingbird

    I was so inspired I wrote a new blog post.

    Scientology’s Judas Marty Rathbun

    http://mbnest.blogspot.com/2017/06/scientologys-judas-marty-rathbun.html

    • dreamcatcher

      Great blog post 👍

      • Mockingbird

        Thanks. A few more are forthcoming.

  • daisy

    Well it is time for covfefe Nite all