TODAY AT SUBSTACK: If you’ve signed up for free emails at Substack, you will receive today’s feature story at your inbox: Scientology leader David Miscavige today marks 66 years on the planet. Will he have a party, with cake? We wonder. As for the Underground Bunker, we’ve turned again to the real experts for their thoughts on this occasion, and we asked them for their birthday greetings! [What is this Substack thing, anyway?]
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Technology Cocktail
“There has been some confusion lately on exactly what is the state of Clear. The confusion was introduced by a statement, not mine, that the State of Clear had harmonics, which is to say there were different states of Clear. This is not true. Although it is quite impossible to obtain an absolute in this universe, the state of Clear is, actually, about as close as one can come to it. I have given some time to it, lately, and have come up with a definition which fits all cases. It is as follows: A CLEAR IS A BEING WHO NO LONGER HAS HIS OWN REACTIVE MIND.” — L. Ron Hubbard, 1981
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“We’ve had a little slowdown here recently on research the last six, seven days — I managed to get the show back on the road again — mostly due to the nonsense going on in Australia. The general situation with regard to that is they’re not in any danger or anything like that, they’re just being cross-advised and being generally upset. The government of Australia….Well, these little boys have an opposition there that are quite red and they all of a sudden decided under a fellow of the name of Galbatty to investigate Scientology on account of how bad it all was, you see? And this is the message I want to get across to you, not the state of Australia. An organization starts slipping, they stop following through standard policies, they are not on the ball here and they individuate there and they goof up someplace else. And then you all of a sudden start having trouble in their vicinity and it finally swells up to something like this inquiry you see, and that sort of thing. Just everybody has to some degree or another taken his finger off of his number and goofed up. You get the idea? In this particular case, why, they ran some jerk down there who they knew was a security risk. He couldn’t pass an E-Meter test if you’d held a gun to his head. He is just a complete bum. So they go ahead and give him high-level processing. Name is Werne. And they give this fellow a bunch of high-level processing and restimulate two or three wrong goals on him one way or the other so he goes into a complete spin. And I think he’d been in psychiatric treatment and he went back under psychiatric treatment, and then he runs over and sees Galbatty to get Galbatty to pass legislation so as to cure his GPMs and it just all went to smoke. And it had never even occurred to anybody down in Melbourne simply to handle Werne, refund his money and straighten him up. When they did refund his money, they didn’t even require him to sign a release. So they went and refunded his money; he went over to the court the same afternoon and filed a suit for a hundred and sixty thousand pounds. I mean, it takes genius, see? It just takes goof up after goof up.” — L. Ron Hubbard, April 30, 1964
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“Customs needs handling in these ports. Fully. And gently. Anyone trying to put things aboard before full clearance can really mess a port up. If you have anything to do with Customs or even think about taking anything ashore or bringing anything on the ship, see the Ships Rep first! Aboard, you are not in the country. When you go through the gate you are in the country. When you come through the gate to come aboard you are leaving the country. This is true even when the ship is lying alongside a berth. So don’t violate or stir up customs officials. They are at the gate. When you go through that gate things you are carrying or escorting are entering or leaving the country. They lock up ‘smugglers’ for 40 years on bread and water and throw the key away.” — The Commodore, April 30, 1971
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“There is no intention here to blame the Church management or the staff. Many are really dedicated guys. I don’t blame either the Scientologists who do not accept the idea of LRH being back in business. They just don’t realize that with the Tech they have, they are not going to make it on a broad scale on Earth. Why, because it is just impossible to train relatively standard auditors with the existing Standard Tech. The proof? Well do you see any volume of active auditors? If I am wrong, may be auditing in the field has become a very secret activity. No, despite any effort past or present in the orgs or in the independent field, there was and there is no auditor training worth its name. Why? Too hard! Too difficult! Too complex! Too complicated!”
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1998: An agreement which Scientologists must sign to become part of Scientologist On-Line was posted this week. The idea is to flood search engines with thousands of near-identical web pages, crowding out pages from Scientology critics. The agreement requires that Scientologists use a web filter to prevent access to critic’s web sites. “Church of Scientology International has been authorized to grant you, as a Scientologist in good standing, the non-exclusive, royalty-free right to reproduce and display on your personal Web site the collective membership mark ‘SCIENTOLOGIST’ and the Scientology symbol, upon certain terms and conditions. If you agree to abide by these terms and conditions, this letter will be your authorization, as long as you remain a Scientologist in good standing and comply with all standards, specifications and guidelines on such use of the Marks. CSI also has the authority to include in this grant the right to reproduce and display on your Web site certain copyrighted photographs of L. Ron Hubbard and certain quotations from the copyrighted works. If you wish to use this authorization regarding the Marks and the Works, you must: submit a copy of your proposed use of the Marks or any quotations from the Works of L. Ron Hubbard to CSI and receive prior written approval on any of these from CSI before putting up or adding to your Web site, and also for any subsequent changes that you wish to make in your Web site; not use the Marks or copyrighted materials in any way or in conjunction with any activities or materials that may be deemed improper or a discredit to the Scientology religion; comply immediately and completely with any and all changes that CSI may require in the Web site, including termination of use of the Marks and the Works if required by CSI; agree to use the specific Internet Filter Program that CSI has provided to you which allows you freedom to view other sites on Dianetics, Scientology or its principals without threat of accessing sites deemed to be using the Marks or Works in an unauthorized fashion or deemed to be improper or discreditable to the Scientology religion. Sincerely, Church of Scientology International, Lynn Farny, Secretary”
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“Scientologists have zero loyalty to anything except Ron and the ‘Tech.’ The concepts of country and patriotism are wog nonsense to them. They are committed to a world wide jihad against all countries and nations. Real Scientologists don’t even feel any loyalty to their family members, let alone their country.”
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Full Court Press: What we’re watching at the Underground Bunker
Criminal prosecutions:
— Danny Masterson charged for raping three women: Sentenced to 30 years to life on Sep 7, 2023. Appeal now fully briefed, waiting for 2nd Appellate District court to set a hearing date. Masterson has also submitted a habeas corpus petition.
— ‘Lafayette Ronald Hubbard’ (a/k/a Justin Craig), aggravated assault, plus drug charges: Grand jury indictments include charges from an assault while in custody. Pleaded guilty on Nov 10 to a 17-year prison sentence (eligible for parole in two to three more years). Awaiting transfer to state prison.
— Aaron Matthes charged for SA of child under 12 years old: OT Scientologist facing multiple mandatory life sentences. Next pretrial court hearing set for March 9.
Civil litigation:
— Leah Remini v. Scientology, alleging ‘Fair Game’ harassment and defamation: Some defamation claims were removed by Judge Hammock. Judge Hammock’s ruling is on appeal, which is now fully briefed. Awaiting the setting of an oral arguments hearing.
— Baxter, Baxter, and Paris v. Scientology, alleging labor trafficking: Forced to ‘religious arbitration.’
— Valerie Haney v. Scientology: Forced to ‘religious arbitration.’ 15 days of arbitration completed, Val waiting for further word from the IJC.
— Chrissie Bixler et al. v. Scientology and Danny Masterson. Judge Upindra Kalra’s ruling denying Scientology’s motion to strike is on appeal. Appeal fully briefed. Motion to replace Jane Does’ AI-tainted brief denied by court. Oral arguments hearing on March 3.
— Jane Doe 1 v. Scientology, David Miscavige, and Gavin Potter: Case unsealed and second amended complaint filed. Scientology moves for religious arbitration. Trial has been set for January 10, 2028.
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Other links: The prosecution of Danny Masterson. Leah Remini’s Fair Game Podcast. Leah Remini’s A&E Series. Scientology’s Celebrities, from A to Z. Bryan Seymour’s suppressed series, Scientology Black Ops: Tom Cruise and dirty tricks. Scientology’s Ideal Orgs, from one end of the planet to the other. Scientology’s sneaky front groups, spreading the good news about L. Ron Hubbard while pretending to benefit society. Scientology Lit: Books reviewed or excerpted in a weekly series. How many have you read?
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THE WHOLE TRACK
[ONE year ago] Scientology leader David Miscavige is 65 today, and we have presents
[TWO years ago] David Miscavige is 64 today, and what a gift Scientology cooked up for him!
[THREE years ago] Scientology honcho David Miscavige turns 63 today, and here’s his official church bio!
[FOUR years ago] Scientology leader David Miscavige is 62 years old today, and we have presents!
[FIVE years ago] Danny Masterson prosecutor: ‘Scientology is inextricably connected to this case’
[SIX years ago] Scientology leader David Miscavige is 60 today, and we have presents
[SEVEN years ago] Questions for Scientologist Elisabeth Moss — from former Scientologists
[EIGHT years ago] David Miscavige turns 58 today, and we’re celebrating with tales of birthdays past
[NINE years ago] Scientology leader David Miscavige turns 57 today — what’s your birthday greeting?
[TEN years ago] A STAR IS BORN: Scientology attorney Monique Yingling steals the spotlight on ’20/20′
[ELEVEN years ago] As Scientology crumbles, read the dreams its members are still chasing
[TWELVE years ago] Scientology leader David Miscavige turns 54 today — Hip, hip, hooray!
[THIRTEEN years ago] The Scientology Method: Drill, Baby, Drill!
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Bernie Headley (1952-2019) did not see his daughter Stephanie in his final 5,667 days.
Joe Reaiche (1958-2024) did not see his daughter Alanna Masterson in his final 6,999 days.
Mike Rinder (1955-2025) did not see his son Benjamin and daughter Taryn in his final 7,589 days.
Tammy Synovec has not seen her daughter Julia in 3,614 days.
Valerie Haney has not seen her mother Lynne in 4,118 days.
Katrina Reyes has not seen her mother Yelena in 4,624 days
Sylvia Wagner DeWall has not seen her brother Randy in 4,174 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his grandson Leo in 3,164 days.
Klaus Büchele has not seen his daughter Jasmin in 5,550 days.
Geoff Levin has not seen his son Collin and daughter Savannah in 3,045 days.
Christie Collbran has not seen her mother Liz King in 6,349 days.
Marc Headley has not seen his mother Trudy in 5,000 days.
Clarissa Adams has not seen her parents Walter and Irmin Huber in 4,218 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 5,772 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 5,113 days.
Dylan Gill has not seen his father Russell in 13,684 days.
Melissa Paris has not seen her father Jean-Francois in 9,600 days.
Valeska Paris has not seen her brother Raphael in 5,767 days.
Mirriam Francis has not seen her brother Ben in 5,353 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 5,612 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica in 4,360 days.
Marie Poulin has not seen her mother June in 3,929 days.
Julian Wain has not seen his brother Joseph or mother Susan in 2,240 days.
Charley Updegrove has not seen his son Toby in 3,415 days.
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 5,097 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 5,434 days.
Roger Weller has not seen his daughter Alyssa in 10,287 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 5,403 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 3,765 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 4,179 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis in 4,564 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 4,448 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 4,012 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike and daughter Emily in 4,524 days.
Mary Jane Barry has not seen her daughter Samantha in 4,784 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 15,888 days.
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Posted by Tony Ortega on April 30, 2026 at 07:00
E-mail tips to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter.
Our book with Paulette Cooper, Battlefield Scientology: Exposing L. Ron Hubbard’s dangerous ‘religion’ is on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats. Our book about Paulette, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.
The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2024 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Underground Bunker (2012-2024), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)
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Tony Ortega at The Daily Beast
