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L. Ron Hubbard is 110 years old, and Scientology is ready for its close-up!

Wherever he is off researching new auditing levels without a physical body, L. Ron Hubbard is 110 years old today, or at least the version of Hubbard that was born on March 13, 1911 in Tilden, Nebraska.

The Great Thetan is actually trillions of years old, of course, and birthdays get to be fairly meaningless when you’ve lived that long. But March 13 is still pretty much the holiest day on the Scientology calendar in honor of its illustrious founder, and we tip our hat to the Commodore on this festive day.

Hubbard himself loved being feted on his birthday and receiving gifts from his followers. And a celebration of his birthday became a huge annual event for Scientology, held every year in Clearwater, Florida at Ruth Eckerd Hall.

Last year, however, the coronavirus crisis shut things down in the days leading up to March 13, and Scientology had to cancel its event, a shocking result for the church. David Miscavige then put out an angry secret bulletin calling the pandemic a “planetary bullbait” — a hoax, in other words, that was a test of Scientology’s mettle.


Miscavige has been congratulating himself recently for taking the initiative and turning the Covid emergency into a public relations opportunity for the church. But as far as we know, another LRH birthday is going without a big event at Ruth Eckerd Hall, making it two years in a row without festivities for Hubbard.

Well, that’s a shame. But take heart, Scientology! Because today at 4 pm, Ted Reinhard will be leading a very special edition of his “Cult City Tours” that will feature some big names: Mike Rinder, Marc Headley, Aaron Smith-Levin, Christie Collbran, Mat Pesch, and Mary Kahn.

Wow! And with David Miscavige now a resident of Clearwater, you can imagine how much Scientology is freaking out.

In fact, you don’t have to imagine it at all!

Last night we called up Mark Bunker to see if he’s going to attend (he says he is), and then he sent over the latest Glen Stilo records request from the church, and wow, this one sure sounds panicky!

So yes, it turns out Scientology is freaked out about this “clearly bigoted activity,” and we sure hope someone is live-streaming so the rest of us can watch what happens.


Glen Stilo Letter March 11 by Tony Ortega


Jon Atack: Scientology vs. Psychiatry

With Karen de la Carriere, Jon considers whether Scientology is really as bad as what Scientology says about psychiatry.




Source Code

“NEW DEVELOPMENTS: Quad Dianetics, Quad Power, Quad R6EW are all going like a bomb. Four Times the result! Opens the door to Quad Grades. Really gives a booster shot. It is the result of taking a discovery in upper level tech and applying it to the lower levels. OUR HGC: Our Flag Auditors are going truly great. The new line works very well. UPSTAT UNITS: The FB (excepting in Action which is in Danger due to necessary by-pass) is doing very well. Including Mimeo. The E/R FSO is great. The HU is doing well. HCI FAO is doing its job well. Qual FAO is picking up. Reg Dept FAO is doing Reg. Income Dept FAO is doing great. Ship’s Rep FSO is doing very well. Other divisions are cordially invited to join this upstat parade by getting organized and into full production.” — L. Ron Hubbard, March 13, 1971


Avast, Ye Mateys

“We, the Officers and crew of the Apollo, Athena, AO Greece, SH Greece, Nkambi and Diana wish you a very happy birthday. Each and every one of us consider it a great honor to serve under you and we vow to honour the trust you have placed in us by backing you up and in every way and fully wearing our hats. You have personally helped each and every one of us to be strong and we will grow stronger and stronger as the days go by. We acknowledge you as the source of Power in Scientology and on this planet and in this Universe. We will do everything we can to ease your burden, to defend you, to give you more ease and provide active contribution to the achievement of our targets. You have, without reservation, our unlimited devotion and loyalty.” — Deputy Captain, Officers and Crew of Apollo; Captain, Officers and Crew AO/SH Greece; Captain, Nkambi; Captain, Officers and Crew of “Diana”; Captain, Officers and Crew of “Athena,” March 13, 1969


Overheard in the FreeZone

“The Independent field is still spending far more time on its own circular comm cycles and infighting that we’ve totally lost the point of why we’re all here. The actual VFP — spiritual freedom for ourselves and others — has just been almost dismissed as an irrelevance. Why can’t we swallow that gnat of our respective games conditions, which frankly are circular and pointless games of chasing overts and motivators, and look at the war zone that surrounds us and just do what we can? How could individuals ever think that there’s anything to be gained in the long term from a narrow-minded 1D introverted view, when ultimately it is themselves they are destroying? I have lurked in the shadows of the Independent field for perhaps a decade and a half now, not really wanting to stick my head too far up the parapet having witnessed the ongoing bizarreness. I think now more than ever, people desperately need our help. We’ve got so much suffering and so much misery that we need to get busy, even if we have disagreements. We need to stop being stuck in Be and start doing a bit of Do and Have. We are clear to the touchline to make a fundamental and unique difference to the planet right now and there are literally no actual barriers stopping us from doing so other than those which we’ve mocked up for ourselves.”



Past is Prologue

2000: The Wichita Eagle reported that Scientology celebrity Kirstie Alley has opened a school behind the Wichita, Kansas mission. “Wichita native Kirstie Alley for the opening of Lillie’s Learning Place, a free tutoring center, named after Alley’s daughter, that is open to people of all ages. The new center is at 3416 E. Oakland, behind the Church of Scientology Mission that Alley established five years ago in Wichita’s College Hill neighborhood. Originally, Lillie’s made its home in the mission’s building. For Alley, as well as the nearly 700 members of the Scientology mission in Wichita, the area holds great value: Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard lived in the neighborhood in the 1950s and wrote some of his essays that would be part of what he called Study Technology — ways to develop learning and comprehension.”


Random Howdy

“So they regulate brothels in Nevada but not drug rehabs?”


Full Court Press: What we’re watching at the Underground Bunker

Criminal prosecutions:
Danny Masterson charged for raping three women: Masterson arraigned Jan 20. Next conf to set prelim, March 24.
Jay and Jeff Spina, Medicare fraud: Jay’s sentencing delayed to April 13.
Hanan and Rizza Islam and other family members, Medi-Cal fraud: Trial scheduled for May 20 in Los Angeles
David Gentile, GPB Capital, fraud: Charged in Brooklyn federal court on Feb 4. Arraigned on Feb 9. Pretrial conference set for Apr 29.

Civil litigation:
Luis and Rocio Garcia v. Scientology: Oral arguments were heard on July 30 at the Eleventh Circuit
Valerie Haney v. Scientology: Forced to ‘religious arbitration.’ Petition for writ of mandate denied Oct 22 by Cal 2nd Appellate District. Petition for review by state supreme court denied Dec 11.
Chrissie Bixler et al. v. Scientology and Danny Masterson: Dec 30, Judge Kleifield granted Scientology’s motions to compel arbitration. June 7: Status conference.
Matt and Kathy Feschbach tax debt: Eleventh Circuit ruled on Sept 9 that Feshbachs can’t discharge IRS debt in bankruptcy. Dec 17: Feshbachs sign court judgment obliging them to pay entire $3.674 million tax debt, plus interest from Nov 19.
Brian Statler Sr v. City of Inglewood: Second amended complaint filed, trial set for Nov 9, 2021.
Author Steve Cannane defamation trial: Trial concluded, Cannane victorious, awarded court costs. Case appealed on Dec 24.

Concluded litigation:
Dennis Nobbe, Medicare fraud, PPP loan fraud: Charged July 29. Bond revoked Sep 14. Nobbe dead, Sep 14.
Jane Doe v. Scientology (in Miami): Jane Doe dismissed the lawsuit on May 15 after the Clearwater Police dropped their criminal investigation of her allegations.


SCIENTOLOGY BLACK OPS: Tom Cruise and dirty tricks

The Australian Seven News network cancelled a 10-part investigation of Scientology and its history of dirty tricks. Read the transcripts of the episodes and judge for yourself why Tom Cruise and Tommy Davis might not have wanted viewers to see this hard-hitting series by journalist Bryan Seymour.


After the success of their double-Emmy-winning, three-season A&E series ‘Scientology and the Aftermath,’ Leah Remini and Mike Rinder continue the conversation on their podcast, ‘Scientology: Fair Game.’ We’ve created a landing page where you can hear all of the episodes so far.


An episode-by-episode guide to Leah Remini’s three-season, double-Emmy winning series that changed everything for Scientology watching. Originally aired from 2016 to 2019 on the A&E network, and now on Netflix.


Find your favorite Hubbardite celeb at this index page — or suggest someone to add to the list!

Other links: Scientology’s Ideal Orgs, from one end of the planet to the other. Scientology’s sneaky front groups, spreading the good news about L. Ron Hubbard while pretending to benefit society. Scientology Lit: Books reviewed or excerpted in a weekly series. How many have you read?



[ONE year ago] For Scientology on L. Ron Hubbard’s birthday: A sworn declaration from Mike Rinder!
[TWO years ago] Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard is celebrating another birthday, and it’s a party!
[THREE years ago] Scientology TV kicks off with Miscavige monologue, settles into familiar propaganda
[FOUR years ago] Danny Masterson turns 41 today, and we have a gift from his cast and crew at ‘The Ranch’
[FIVE years ago] John Travolta and his ancient galactic friends celebrate Scientology’s holiest day of year
[SEVEN years ago] ‘BARE-FACED MESSIAH’ back in print: Our interview with author Russell Miller
[EIGHT years ago] What Could L. Ron Hubbard Use on His 102nd Birthday? How About a Little SUPER POWER!
[NINE years ago] Happy Birthday, L. Ron Hubbard! Here’s Our Surprise Gift For Scientology’s Founder
[TWELVE years ago] Scientology Gets Its Ass Kicked In the Desert


Scientology disconnection, a reminder

Bernie Headley (1952-2019) did not see his daughter Stephanie in his final 5,667 days.
Valerie Haney has not seen her mother Lynne in 2,239 days.
Katrina Reyes has not seen her mother Yelena in 2,743 days
Sylvia Wagner DeWall has not seen her brother Randy in 2,263 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his grandson Leo in 1,283 days.
Geoff Levin has not seen his son Collin and daughter Savannah in 1,174 days.
Christie Collbran has not seen her mother Liz King in 4,481 days.
Clarissa Adams has not seen her parents Walter and Irmin Huber in 2,349 days.
Carol Nyburg has not seen her daughter Nancy in 3,123 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 3,927 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 3,243 days.
Dylan Gill has not seen his father Russell in 11,809 days.
Melissa Paris has not seen her father Jean-Francois in 7,728 days.
Valeska Paris has not seen her brother Raphael in 3,896 days.
Mirriam Francis has not seen her brother Ben in 3,477 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 3,738 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 2,776 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica in 2,489 days.
Marie Bilheimer has not seen her mother June in 2,014 days.
Julian Wain has not seen his brother Joseph or mother Susan in 369 days.
Charley Updegrove has not seen his son Toby in 1,544 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 6,095 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 3,244 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 3,564 days.
Roger Weller has not seen his daughter Alyssa in 8,419 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 3,538 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 1,894 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin and daughter Taryn in 6,197 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 2,303 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis in 2,705 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 2,577 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 2,160 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike and daughter Emily in 2,655 days.
Mary Jane Barry has not seen her daughter Samantha in 2,909 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 14,018 days.


Posted by Tony Ortega on March 13, 2021 at 07:00

E-mail tips to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We also post updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our new book with Paulette Cooper, Battlefield Scientology: Exposing L. Ron Hubbard’s dangerous ‘religion’ is now on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats. Our book about Paulette, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2020 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Underground Bunker (2012-2020), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Other links: BLOGGING DIANETICS: Reading Scientology’s founding text cover to cover | UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists | GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice | SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts | Shelly Miscavige, 15 years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Watch our short videos that explain Scientology’s controversies in three minutes or less…

Check your whale level at our dedicated page for status updates, or join us at the Underground Bunker’s Facebook discussion group for more frivolity.

Our non-Scientology stories: Robert Burnham Jr., the man who inscribed the universe | Notorious alt-right inspiration Kevin MacDonald and his theories about Jewish DNA | The selling of the “Phoenix Lights” | Astronomer Harlow Shapley‘s FBI file | Sex, spies, and local TV news | Battling Babe-Hounds: Ross Jeffries v. R. Don Steele


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