Kansas City gets its first Scientology wedding: We solicited some advice for the young couple

 
Scientology’s newest ‘Ideal Org’ opened on Saturday in Kansas City, and the next day, Sunday November 3, it had its first wedding, with Hubbardite rites and all the feels.

Now, it seems to us that the first Scientology wedding at the new Scientology cathedral is kind of a big deal, but Scientology itself hasn’t said anything about it, strangely enough.

You’d think the church would have wanted to show off such normal looking images of midwestern nuptials to help the organization counter all of its bad press as a bunch of bullying space-worshiping weirdos.

After all, take a look at this wholesome good fun…

 
Aw shucks. We honestly wish this good-looking young couple the best.

But we also thought it might be a good idea to check in with some other folks who have been in their shoes and who might have some words of wisdom for our lovebirds.

We asked some former Scientologists, what should this couple know about marriage in the church?

Mike Rinder: Scientology proclaims great love and respect for the family and the institution of marriage. But this is the end of the story. They proclaim it. Like so many things in Scientology, the truth is very different. Everything, and yes, I do literally mean everything, is second in importance to the organization. Family. Marriage. Financial well-being. Your right to think and speak. If tomorrow one of these happy young newlyweds were to confess in session that they saw David Miscavige punching a staff member before his ribbon yanking ceremony on Saturday, and if he or she maintained that this is what they had seen despite rollbacks, sec checking, and lower conditions, there are only two outcomes. This couple would be out of Scientology together or divorced. If the organization determines in its infinite wisdom that one half of a marriage is trouble, the solution is to disconnect from that person (i.e. divorce). There are hundreds if not thousands of examples of this. The much ballyhooed “Marriage Counseling” only keeps marriages together if the organization wants it that way. When Tom Cruise wanted to dump Mimi Rogers for Nicole Kidman, the “Marriage Counseling” had a foregone outcome as the organization wanted to make him happy. When Nicole didn’t want to continue in Scientology and was not kowtowing to David Miscavige, that marriage also had a foregone conclusion. Same with Katie Holmes. And it should make young couples (and everyone else) have real concern. After all, Tom Cruise is the poster child for Scientology. The second biggest being on planet earth has had three failed marriages and three divorces since being in Scientology. I hope this couple doesn’t run afoul of the organization and end up divorced. More than that, I hope this couple both run afoul of the organization and both end up leaving and living a long and happy life.

Karen de la Carriere: When you marry as a Scientology couple, you must realize that there will be three people in the marriage. Pillow talk and very private sexual data will be written up in Knowledge Reports and sometimes broadcast to 20 different Sea Org members. When either of the couple have an upset, one or the other use the weight of the church and their policies to fight the other. Worst of all, anything confessed in a session can and will be shown to the other partner if that partner has decided to exit Scientology or has withdrawn allegiance. Hopes for higher enlightenment are squashed if one of the partners have friended an SP or are watching Tony Ortega’s blog or Mike Rinder’s blog. It is called EXTERNAL INFLUENCE.

Heather Ruggeri: Having been married young myself I can tell you that extreme pressure is brought on. My first husband at 17, was a short lived marriage. We were separated for a while and I was pressured to divorce him. He ended up leaving and the pressure continued to divorce him. This was after the coerced abortion. At 17 and 18 yrs old, one is not mature enough to make these decisions. At 19 I married again. Still too young and hurried. The whole prospect of marriage comes out of a sense that you can’t have sex out of wedlock. In my experience outside of the Sea Org and Scientology, I’ve witnessed that the whole premise of marriage is such a different concept. People meet, sometimes in school, college or what not. They date for a while, get to know each other and then get married. This is usually done as adults. Pressure is definitely brought on to couples when one spouse is not doing right by the rules of the church. Take a look at how they play couples from the episode I was on, Season 3, Episode 7.

Lori Hodgson: Young Scientology couples that get married in the church need to be aware of some awful and horrific things that can happen in their future together. I know from experience and will share a few. The first is if one person in the marriage is doing something that the church frowns upon, then the partner has to write a Knowledge Report on them which means snitch on them. For example, you can’t just communicate with your partner about things you may not like in the church without getting in trouble with the church. If the couple has children, when they reach the age of 15 they will be recruited for the Sea Org behind the parents’ backs. The saddest is when one partner decides to leave the church, that person who leaves will lose everything including their children, family and all friends still in. I know because this is what happened to me. I wish I could warn every couple that chooses to embark upon Scientology.

Marie Bilheimer: It’s coming up on 15 years since Aaron’s passing and I have mixed feelings on the whole subject of young marriages in Scientology. I don’t agree with it, but I don’t regret my marriage to him. I wish neither of us had to experience the kind of marriage Scientology requires you to have. I wish that Scientology marriages didn’t pit partners against each other and require a breaking of the marital bond for the sake of the church always being right and coming first. I’ve known other couples where one of the partners was starting to wake up and they were scared to voice this to the other for fear they would get reported and lose even that relationship. In my own family, my mother chose her marriage to my stepfather and Scientology over all of her children. The views are so skewed and the policies, aside from just those relating to marriage itself, are so entwined, they lead people to make decisions that will ultimately hurt themselves and their family. In my mother’s case, this decision has also resulted in a tumultuous relationship with the rest of her non-Scientology family, most of whom do not wish to see or speak to her. It’s very sad. Even sadder is that this is a common occurrence, not singular to just my family. One wrong thing in Scientology isn’t the worst, it’s how it’s compounded by the effects of every little layer and idiosyncrasy involved.

Tory Christman: You are expected to rat on each other. The church thinks it is always first….and often is. If either one of you begins to question the many abuses in Scientology you are sent to ethics. The majority of your money goes to Scientology. You will be endlessly pressured to join the Sea Org and donate to the many front groups. You cannot tell your wife or husband how you really feel. If either of you leaves, you will be declared SP and family and friends will cut you off, never to speak to you again. These are just some of the reasons why I would never get married in Scientology.

Phil Jones: Willie and I were lucky and even though we got married by a Scientology minister (who got crazy drunk at the reception, made a fool of himself, and then was found having sex with someone in the bathroom when he failed to lock the door), we managed to survive it all for over 40 years. Of course we had our few run-ins at times but we were never Sea Org and also I tended to be a bit rebellious with Scientology’s control. It still amazes me I didn’t get declared on numerous occasions. Once when Willie and I were both on staff in the early years we were summoned into the ED’s office. We arrived in his office where he was sitting at his desk with five of his cronies standing behind him. I was curious to what this was about as it seemed pretty intense and thought that we might be in trouble for something, though I had no idea what it might be. Once we were seated the ED made some statement about our relationship, then told us we needed to tell him about our sex life, in detail. I looked at him, then looked at his ‘crew’ behind him. They weren’t joking around. This wasn’t even an auditing session. Just a weird dig into our personal lives. I basically told the ED to go f#%& himself, stood up, walked halfway to the door until Willie got up and followed me out of the room. Just another bizarre day in the Scientology world.

Sylvia DeWall: Marriage will never be a sacred thing to the church. They’ll have no issue whatsoever with encouraging a divorce if there is something in it for them (i.e. money or a new staff member). Its only useful purpose (in the church’s eye) is to use it as leverage against the other spouse (ethics reports, agreement on donations, volunteering). Side note: Tim and I renewed our vows a couple years ago. The two different ceremonies written by LRH in the 2-D book are very silly in retrospect.

 
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Bonus items from our tipsters

An all-Ideal California? Isn’t Ventura still to be completed?

 
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Source Code

“Your thetan has to be able to tolerate three kinds of space in order to endure at all in this universe. This universe isn’t any savage beast sitting there. It’s just a sort of an inanimate boobytrap which we have made ourselves, really. And then we victimized ourselves with it, so we have all been betrayed. This universe couldn’t have had a better purpose in going forward so that everybody could be the, have the beautiful sadness of having been betrayed. And yet you look into it, the only person that can betray an individual is himself.” — L. Ron Hubbard, November 6, 1953

 
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Overheard in the FreeZone

“Real Scientology is safe and busy finding its way to billions of individuals. Like water it will bend and bleed and trickle into every crevice it encounters on its journey into the consciousness of modern Man. A hundred SP dictators could not stop it, no more than they could stop a rainstorm from tumbling down. Those Beings who are ready for it get it; those who are not will not experience its gifts, or the joys they bring. Not at this time, but in their own time, they will I’m sure.”

 
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Random Howdy

“I understand where you’re coming from but the bottom line is that Scientology is a con and conning people is illegal, regardless of whether the victims are dupes and suckers.”

 
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Scientology’s celebrities, ‘Ideal Orgs,’ and more!

We’ve been building landing pages about David Miscavige’s favorite playthings, including celebrities and ‘Ideal Orgs,’ and we’re hoping you’ll join in and help us gather as much information as we can about them. Head on over and help us with links and photos and comments.

Scientology’s celebrities, from A to Z! Find your favorite Hubbardite celeb at this index page — or suggest someone to add to the list!

Scientology’s ‘Ideal Orgs,’ from one end of the planet to the other! Help us build up pages about each these worldwide locations!

Scientology’s sneaky front groups, spreading the good news about L. Ron Hubbard while pretending to benefit society!

Scientology Lit: Books reviewed or excerpted in our weekly series. How many have you read?

 
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THE WHOLE TRACK

[ONE year ago] Juliette Lewis wants on ‘Red Table Talk’ — and here’s what Jada Smith should ask her
[TWO years ago] Tracking Scientology’s claims about membership — a new digital project with Jonny Jacobsen
[THREE years ago] After Scientologist is outed, leaders he fooled still stick up for his quack drug theories
[FOUR years ago] SCIENTOLOGY DENIED: APPEAL SHOT DOWN AFTER YEARLONG WAIT
[FIVE years ago] RIFFER MADNESS: Scientology leader David Miscavige goes smeary in new court filing
[SIX years ago] More Questions About Scientology-Style Drug Rehab And Insurance — This Time in Michigan
[SEVEN years ago] Scientology and the Presidential Election
[EIGHT years ago] Scientology Sunday Service: Your Open Thread For Worship (Or Whatever)

 
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Posted by Tony Ortega on November 6, 2019 at 07:00

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