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Before Scientology’s Xenu was a genocidal galactic overlord, he was a … mountain?

[The Supreme Rul-ah]

This doesn’t happen every day: A tipster recently pointed us to something buried in a 1958 L. Ron Hubbard lecture that really knocked us for a loop. And so we showed it to half a dozen of the best experts we know on the subject, and not only had none of them noticed the item before, most of them admitted they were stumped about it.

What was it that had us puzzled? It turns out that Hubbard mentioned the name “Xenu” ten years before that word became such a famous part of Scientology’s secret lore.

Even if you’re the most casual Scientology watcher, you’ve no doubt heard of Xenu. Hubbard famously described him in a February 1968 handwritten document for the “OT 3” auditing level, and then in more detail several months later in a taped lecture in which he said the name “could be spelled X-e-m-u.” Nine years later, Xenu became one of the main characters in “Revolt in the Stars,” a screenplay Hubbard wrote while he was hiding in Sparks, Nevada from process servers and the FBI.

Robert Kaufman, in his 1972 book Inside Scientology, was the first former Scientologist to make public the name Xenu and that it was part of Scientology’s upper-level secret teachings. The Clearwater Sun wrote about Xenu in 1980, and the Los Angeles Times really boosted Xenu’s fame with a 1986 story and then a 1990 series. But it was the Comedy Central show South Park that made Xenu a household name with its 2005 episode, “Trapped in the Closet.”

 

[Xenu’s star-turn in South Park’s ‘Trapped in the Closet’]

 
You probably know at least the bare outline of the story that Hubbard revealed about Xenu in the 1968 OT 3 materials, that some 75 million years ago he ran a federation of 76 planets with an overpopulation problem. So he had beings by the billions brought to planet Teegeeack, which was Earth’s name then. He vaporized the beings with hydrogen bombs, then captured their souls and subjected them to mental image pictures before setting them loose on the planet. To this day, you learn in OT 3, you are actually made up of clusters of these unseen beings left over from that 75-million-year-old genocide, and you spend the next higher Scientology auditing levels — from OT 4 to OT 7 — locating and chasing these invisible beings away (and at insanely high prices).

But why “Xenu”? Was Hubbard trying to convince his followers that this was an actual person who had really lived 75 million years ago? Scientology historian Jon Atack has told us again and again that church members are expected to consider everything Hubbard wrote as infallible scripture. But it’s hard for an outsider not to assume that with a name that has the sound “zee-noo,” Hubbard wasn’t just pulling things out of his ample posterior.

And that’s why we think the 1958 lecture we’re looking at today — recorded ten years before “OT 3” — is an interesting reflection on that. In a typically turgid passage, Hubbard manages to come up with two words while riffing rapidly that seem to be transpositions of the same sounds — “ex-noo” and “zee-noo.”

Here, listen for yourself to this fair use excerpt, and then look carefully at the transcript…

 

Now the person you are processing, the person you have under the guns of the E-Meter right at this moment, has wrong with him just this fact only: That the ‘significances’ surrounding matter, energy, space, and time are so overwhelming that he cannot easily approach the is-ness of things, and this is particularly true of the Rock.

The Rock has such terrific significances connected with it: “Violations, survival, not to survive, thisa, thata, the other thing, identifications, cross-references, see file B, see file A, 1,002,642, cross-reference Navy Department” — you get the idea.

“Bulletin of War, Space Command, Planet Exnoo, figure-figure-figure-figure, think-think-think-think-think-think, figure-figure-figure-figure, thought-thought-thought-thought-thought, significance-significance-significance-significance…” And when he looks at this particular piece of matter, energy, space, and time which is all it’s conceived of, he doesn’t conceive of matter, energy, space, and time. He thinks “Cross-reference: Space Command, 8,000,000,682, general order to all torpedo-men. Following: pursuant to the orders of the admiral …” See? Now, this unfortunately cross-references with “Order of the Day, Monastery Platitude, Mount Xenu.’There shall be peace.'” Which conflicts with, “Dear, I know you are dedicated to holy orders, but I need a new pair of shoes.” Which in itself is very vastly in conflict with “Order of the Mount: Honor thy father and thy mother.” Wait a minute, how’d that get in there? And that’s why the preclear’s so baffled.

This excerpt is from a series of lectures known as the 20th American ACC, for “Advanced Clinical Course,” which Scientology today sells for $375, and describes like this…

With clearing now an accomplished fact, Mr. Hubbard devoted the 20th American Advanced Clinical Course in Washington, DC, to a comprehensive restatement of the very fundamentals of auditing from the perspective of all that had been learned in those intense years of research and discovery. In other words, not merely what process to run and why, but something even more basic—the skill and technical application required of an auditor to evoke from the preclear the willingness to be audited and their full participation in the session—namely, in-sessionness…

Hey, sounds like a bargain. Anyway, to understand what Hubbard is talking about in this excerpt, and to explore this surprising use of the word “Xenu,” we asked for help from several of our favorite experts on Scientology technical matters, former church members with decades of experience.

Not one of them said they had ever noticed this use of “Xenu” a decade before OT 3.

“The 20th ACC lectures were not part of auditor training, so I had not run across this passage before,” Bruce Hines told us. “Fascinating and completely new to me,” Jon Atack said. “I’ve never heard the lecture you’re quoting from,” Dan Koon told us.

The particular lecture is titled, “The Rock: Putting the PC at Cause,” and we were told by our experts that “The Rock” referred to a concept that Hubbard only developed for a short while before moving on to other avenues. “The Rock is something that appeared only briefly and there were a couple of bulletins that mentioned it, almost in passing, and then it was never heard from again,” Koon says.

“Ask 10 different Scientologists about The Rock and you will get 10 different answers, probably all wrong,” says ‘Techie,’ who often chimes in with expert commentary about technical matters here at the Bunker.

“The simplest explanation of The Rock is that it’s the entire case of a person, down the entire whole track,” says Sunny Pereira, referring to a thetan’s whole track of existence, which is trillions of years. “The Rock is where the thetan stores his illogic and keeps it to use all up and down his lifetimes. They hold him down, like a reactive mind, but on a timeless timeline, if that makes sense.”

Anyway, we think what’s happening in that passage is that Hubbard is explaining that to get to the root of what’s going on in a particular person’s case, you have to deal with chains of “significances” that anyone is going to have bouncing around in their head but that are extraneous and not helpful. In order to demonstrate that, he riffs on several different chains of words, and it seems obvious that he’s making stuff up on the spot to act as examples (“thisa, thata, the other thing”). During that riffing he comes up with “Planet Exnoo” and “Mount Xenu,” nonsense words that we know now were already in his head when, a decade later, he sat down to write up this planet’s history in OT 3.

We asked our experts, did the 1958 Mount Xenu really have any connection to the Xenu who shows up ten years later as the genocidal galactic overlord or did it, as it appeared to us, just show that Hubbard was pulling similar sounds out of thin air because they sounded exotic to him, and so the sound “zee-noo” happened to turn up in both 1958 and 1968?

Our experts said they saw no actual connection between 1958’s Mount Xenu and 1968’s Xenu of OT 3. “Hubbard had an active imagination and was used to coming up with ‘science-fiction-sounding’ names for things like planets and space-opera beings,” Bruce Hines said. “I tend to agree with you, I think he is just making up words as he goes along,” Jefferson Hawkins told us.

“This is a peculiar little gem,” Atack said. “I agree that it isn’t the ‘Xenu origin story’ but it points to Hubbard’s limited stock of ideas and his drug-addled repetition of them…Hubbard didn’t believe there was anything new – only the reconstituting of existing material – and he lived by that principle, so he recycles material. This includes acronyms and abbreviations – RTC is an example. It originally meant Ron’s Technical Compilations before it was the Religious Technology Center. He used ‘CC’ for both Clearing Course and Celebrity Centre.”

And speaking of recycling, “Mount Xenu” will also show up again — in the 1977 “Revolt in the Stars” screenplay, but this time referring to the mountain prison on the Planet Tawn where Xenu is imprisoned to this day.

What do you think? Does this repetition show a steel-trap mind unlocking the secrets of the universe, or a carnival barker making shit up as he goes along? Or something else? We look forward to your own assessment of 1958’s “Mount Xenu.”

 
——————–

Aaron Smith-Levin answers your questions

Aaron answers a variety of questions in this video, including how Scientologists try to assure that their next life will be with a Scientology family, and why some public figures leave the church but don’t talk publicly about it.

 

 
——————–

Bonus items from our tipsters

Scenes from Coachman Park and the Fort Harrison Hotel from Scientology’s Easter celebrations, when the return of Elvis to the planet Marcab results in much rejoicing.

 



 
——————–

Countdown to Denver!

 

 
HowdyCon 2017: Denver, June 23-25. Go here to start making your plans.

 
——————–

Scientology disconnection, a reminder

Bernie Headley has not seen his daughter Stephanie in 4,723 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 1,826 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 2,320 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 1,360 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy in 1,072 days.
Marie Bilheimer has not seen her mother June in 598 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 4,687 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 1,827 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 2,147 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 2,122 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 478 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin in 4,780 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 887 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis for 1,289 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 1,162 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 743 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike in 1,248 days.
Mary Jane Sterne has not seen her daughter Samantha in 1,492 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 12,601 days.

 
——————–

3D-UnbreakablePosted by Tony Ortega on April 17, 2017 at 07:00

E-mail tips and story ideas to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We post behind-the-scenes updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our book, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information about the book, and our 2015 book tour, can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2016 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Undergound Bunker (2012-2016), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Learn about Scientology with our numerous series with experts…

BLOGGING DIANETICS: We read Scientology’s founding text cover to cover with the help of L.A. attorney and former church member Vance Woodward
UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists
GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice
SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts

Other links: Shelly Miscavige, ten years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | Scientology’s Private Dancer | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | Scientology boasts about assistance from Google | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Our Guide to Alex Gibney’s film ‘Going Clear,’ and our pages about its principal figures…
Jason Beghe | Tom DeVocht | Sara Goldberg | Paul Haggis | Mark “Marty” Rathbun | Mike Rinder | Spanky Taylor | Hana Whitfield

 

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  • BEETEE

    Thank you Aaron Smith-Levin – for another great pod cast. I am using your videos to help others and the information is fantastic.

    I would love to hear you discuss the mind fuck of the “free loader debt”. Can you talk about what you did for a $100,000 Free loader debt as far as services. Keep in mind Scientology is not supposed to charge for Sec Checks.

    I mean – here this “non profit Church – who is sitting on a billion dollars” convincing people to join staff so they can get the bridge. They are told to do Scientology courses and auditing to “qualify for staff” – sign away their rights completely and then are treated like shit – not making any money…if they don’t like it and leave – they are strapped with a huge bill from the cult.

    Surely – this is against the law. Has anyone challenged it?

    • MrsShark

      Its not legally binding.

      • BEETEE

        I know it is not legally binding but it is mind fuck binding – which is worse when you find out the whole thing was a scam.

    • Harpoona Frittata

      It would be in any regular work setting, but because $cn is an official tax-exempt religious organization, workers who are also cherch members can be treated in ways that are not allowed in regular employment settings.

  • * * * * * BEGIN QUOTATION * * * * *

    “Twenty-four years ago I was sexually assaulted. I was about 22 years old. At the time I worked for the Church of Scientology and was told not to report the assault, or seek medical attention for injuries I sustained. The church didn’t want negative attention or authorities being called to their Los Angeles complex, which is where I was at the time.

    I was convinced by individuals within Scientology that I must have done something to provoke what happened to me, therefore I was solely responsible for what happened. It took me almost another 20 years and leaving Scientology to realize what happened to me was not only not my fault in any way, shape or form, but it was a heinous crime that should have been reported.”

    * * * * * END QUOTATION * * * * *

    http://www.swnewsmedia.com/lakeshore_weekly/news/opinion/columnists/column-is-an-eye-for-an-eye-the-right-thing/article_66722afb-c63a-597c-837f-2a1477f5fdd3.html

    /

  • Shivani33

    Last night’s episode of E!’s series, The Arrangement, showed the leader of the Institute of the Higher Mind going on a “synthetic psilocybin” trip, rife with personal hallucinations, some of which seemed designed to pinpoint his genuine motivations for being a “spiritual leader.” It fits in rather well with today’s Bunker subject.

  • Intergalactic Walrus

    Apparently the clams don’t hear what we hear. “Straight to the point”?
    (refresh)

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/a800adc33c17a3bbca403eb1a438c109f94828c61c8a8d19bacb6fce1710a6cc.png

    • madame duran

      Dianetics–that mélange of verbal diarrhea–is “straight to the point”? If something about New Jersey inspired Hubbard to write that nonsense, that wouldn’t be a point of pride for residents of that state (he came before the modern Jersey Shore so I can’t blame that reality show).

      That comment goes to show how Scientologists begin to morph their minds into liking and glorifying anything related to Hubbard. I doubt any of them would be open to admitting that Hubbard sounded boring or was confusing.

    • that feel when you Hearsay for an appropriate “it’s a Jersey Thing” pic, get to the following image, and know exactly what it means: https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/fd2998b3280ae35e28850feec7ee896d3f0f2f5456cd2837119e73b83286741d.jpg

    • WhiteCentauress

      I can only say……..😂💦

    • Rasha

      *vehement denial from New Jersey in 3…. 2….. 1……*

  • Hamtaro

    Every time you show this shoop of Baby, I think: I bet that’s exactly what she looked like on her nights off when she was a young waitress. She was probably the baddest bitch from Cincinnati to the Great Lakes.

    I worship at the altar of Baby in wide belt loop white cotton hot pants. And I am not ashamed.

    • MaxSpaceman

      Ask Baby to repost the picture of her from back in the day

      the one in the violet bikini

      that’s beyond the beyond. Baby’s La Bomba 🙂

      • Baby

        Good Lord Max..hahaha Ohhhh my favorite avi.. Stewart Granger ( see I didn’t forget)

        I think they’ve all seen it.. xo

        • MaxSpaceman

          A young George Saunders 🙂

          Don’t think so- it’s been a long time. Please post the violet bikini picture once again. It is the bestest. 🙂

          • Baby

            hahahha that’s right George Saunders..hahahha .. OMG .. For you I will Max.. and for Cent .. and those who haven’t seen it..

            For those who are sick of it.. I am sorry.. Damn… really I mean it.

            • daisy

              Yeah 2 puzzles .

            • Baby

              daisy.. you crack me up.. really.. Crack me up..I wish I could bottle you up and sell you door to door.

            • daisy

              LOL – I spent my youth selling myself from seedy hotel room door to door . Very little money in it , but what fun .

            • Baby

              Fun is what it is all about Daisy.. xo

        • WhiteCentauress

          Some of us are new here. 😉

          • Baby

            I don’t want the old times to throw Hubs Tomatoes at me Cent.. xo
            One day..

      • Juicer77

        Hi Max!!

        • MaxSpaceman

          Hi there! Long time. Huge busy :-/ When you return to States?

          • Juicer77

            Hopefully it’s a good busy. Got a while to go yet. 🙂

    • Baby

      HAM!!!! OMG… I love you.. Plus where ya been honey..

      I know Ham.. shit.. In retrospect I wish I would have been a Call Girl Back then.. instead of a waitress..

      • DangDadgummit

        Hahahahahahaha!
        You are the realest best :))

        • Baby

          smooches..

  • Rasha

    *whew* Back from work, now. We can start.

    • finally … thawed room temperature Reptilicus meat. pro or con?

      • Rasha

        Sliced thin, and piled high…..

        • Rasha

          …even if you refreeze it, it will never be the same….

  • Baby

    My Mac. I’m off to the store but wanted you to see the only man I have truly loved. My Mac. He keeps me grounded. Oh and Mac..when I told you to shave your beard off.. It didn’t look like that! Grow it back.. xox

    Uh please.. His addiction of choice is RED FISH..

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/f8e19b3e24e5b5aac3af13c36a6b5b597490740b6eb87fed58d468dda24870df.jpg

    • Jimmy3

      Good looking guy. But why is some dude holding him up like that?

      • Baby

        He’s a sucker..

    • Supper Powers

      I heart this so hard.

      • Baby

        I truly do have my ” Old Man and the Sea..”

        The secret to our marriage is that we have nothing in common and are NOT joined at the hip.

        • Jimmy3

          You both know you look damn good in short shorts and boots. That’s something in common.

          • Baby

            hahahhahahahahahaha .. OH jimmy.. you funny.. Never saw this man in a pair of shorts..
            He is always in his fishing pants..

            • Sherbet

              OMG, I really should read more slowly. Honest to Xenu, I read this as: He is always fishing in his pants.

            • Jimmy3

              So there’s a great chance they’ve both been banned from a public library. Another thing in common!

            • Sherbet

              Right-o!

            • Baby

              BAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHA .. omg..

              Damn Sherb..running to bathroom.

        • Supper Powers

          That really is a good approach for so many people.

        • Rasha

          A happy life together should include an occasional gentle, defeated, rolling of eyes. It’s the mix of spices that makes the dish interesting……. -_^

    • flyonthewall

      he seems like a Grand Mac indeed

      • Baby

        awwww.. and I’m a Baby Mac..

    • Rasha

      The lake is gonna slide off if you hold it like that……

      • Baby

        He catches and releases.. and does his best not to harm.. Rashie..

        ( Oh I just got it..hahahhaha)

        • Rasha

          -_^

        • “He catches and releases.”
          You’re a keeper.

          • Baby

            Awww.. Never thought of it like that before.. duh.. I will tell him that..

    • Sherbet

      Why is he using jumper cables on that fish?

      • Jimmy3

        Probably just misread the recipe. It said “beer batter”, not “beer battery”

        • Sherbet

          OK. I knew it wasn’t an electric eel, so I was confused.

      • Baby

        Asked Mac and he started laughing..” It’s a fish grip..it’s plastic and doesn’t hurt the fish..”

        He just saw his picture and said.. ” Oh brother..they don’t want to see me.. ”

        I said.. ” They want to see the man who can put up with me..ha”

        • WhiteCentauress

          He’s very handsome❣️😉

          • Baby

            Thanks Cent.. I will tell him you said so… he has always been modest about everything .. so he’ll say..

            Nah.. it’s the fish.. xo

        • Sherbet

          Of course we want to see him!

          • Baby

            I’ve only talked about him how many years.. I thought it was time.. xo

        • Baby thx. I have a partner who has stuck with me 5 years. I’ve been stumbling and tripping over nothing getting out of $ and he doesn’t complain, just checks if I want anything from the store. We go fishing often. I have to figure out how to snag me one of those RED FISH. Protein and cigs fights off $ demons…. They fall to the floor and I wisk em out with my nice new broom. I appreciate when you all share your real life’s. I have a puppy bonus. Some days I feel very lucky. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/02a48e11c1d7fbbda4c9f999029709b70c6e737e8da41cebf9ed131a502ca262.jpg

          • Baby

            I’ll trade you your puppy for Mac Cece.. hahhahaha.. xo .. Your partner is very lucky to have you honey..

    • daisy

      Oh Baby He is fine !! Big hands ! I am going to make a puzzle out of him !

      • Baby

        bawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwhahahhahahhaha Daisy have I told you lately how much I love you?

        • daisy

          Back at ya doll !!

    • “For so many years we have shared this bed
      We grew up together after we were wed
      We moved around the country from Maine to Tennessee
      But I still can’t forgive you for puttin’ up with me.

      For so many years we’ve had this chest of drawers
      We even hung together through the teen-age wars
      We learned how to cool it when we disagree
      But I still can’t forgive you for puttin’ up with me.

      For so many years we’ve had the same address
      I’m almost contented now, I must confess
      We made our contribution to the family tree
      But I still can’t forgive you for puttin’ up with me.”
      (Mose Allison)

      It was only in looking this up just now that I learned Mose had passed late last year.
      An American treasure.
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VXia12Is4Vc

      • Baby

        Oh Shorp thanks honey.. sweet song..

  • Delraye

    I love Aaron Smith-Levin’s laugh!!! I laugh every time he does. His laugh says “Isn’t this some wacked out, unbelievable, ridiculous shit I just told you about?” lol Keep it coming!

    • Supper Powers

      I concur! It’s one of the best laughs ever. Mixed with his brilliant wit. He’s a pleasure to listen to.

    • pluvo

      Ditto. And the idiots in the CoS make such a person their enemy.

      Delray, nice to see you here. Why do you comment so seldom?

      • Delraye

        I am a never in so sometimes I hesitate at some of the things I would like to comment on. lol I will worship from afar. I think all of you are awesome.

  • Intergalactic Walrus
    • Supper Powers

      Be kind to others and to yourself. Work hard. Don’t take advantage of others or steal. Laugh with your friends and family. Take care of a pet or plants.

      There, now give me a half mil.

    • DangDadgummit

      Dang!

    • April

      If you’re only happy when things go the way you want them to, then you’re in for a lot of sadness and frustration.

      • Intergalactic Walrus

        And only truly ethical people can be truly happy. So, that money they waste being interrogated by ethics officers is just for their own good. Without it, they will never be truly happy. Yeesh!

      • madame duran

        Hence so many Scientologists getting stuck on a level and relying heavily on auditing to deliver the short-term Tone 40 euphoria…only to fall back into general misery and the fear of entheta. Gotta mask those doubts and insecurities with exclamation marks!!!

        Like drug addicts looking for a fix.

        Notice there’s no mention about family, friends, God or anything non-Scientological that could possibly give a person happiness. The commentator gives a lot of pronouncements but no personal experience shared of his/her own happiness. I don’t sense any contentment at all.

    • Sherbet

      I read this, and all I want to say is, “Oh, shut up. You sound like an idiot.”

  • madame duran

    Most of you are familiar with this by now but I’ve been slacking off a bit. I need to keep reminding those OSA agents on Internet duty of how long it has taken for Miscavige to complete what should’ve been done on SMP’s Opening Day.

    I may have to continue the countdown under a different title since Scientology won’t be running a network of its own as originally promised (having no broadcasting license and limited signal range really trips up global dissemination plans. Oh…but if the cult already has multiple social media accounts to disseminate, why was purchasing a brick-and-mortar building even necessary?? So many questions, so much waste of money…).

    https://www.tickcounter.com/countup/1464462000000/america-los_angeles/owd/FFFFFF3B5998000000FF0000/No_On-Air_Programming_since_SMP_Grand_Opening (months, weeks, days)
    http://www.webcountdown.net/?a=ZuRrbYa (days, hours, minutes, seconds)

  • Intergalactic Walrus
    • Rasha

      O.o

    • Jimmy3

      Can tomorrow’s article just be shit this lady says?

      • Rasha

        TONEH!! THIS!!! ^^^^^_^

    • WhiteCentauress

      Is there such a thing as a negative IQ?

    • daisy

      You need to follow this woman for us. It was the funniest comment I have heard in a while

      • Jimmy3

        Right? If this lady wrote a book, I would camp outside the store to be the first to buy it. And probably some other hobo would say, “What are you doing here? Border’s closed years ago.” But I don’t care, hobo.

        • daisy

          What happened to Borders ?!?! Now where am I going to get cliff notes ? Where do I get good coffee ?

          • Sherbet

            Waldenbooks. Oh, wait…

            • JJ

              The only thing left is Auntie’s Bookstore in Spokane Washington. Come on down before they make books illegal.

            • Sherbet

              Still Barnes & Noble here.

          • Jimmy3

            I dunno. Probably built a wall or something. I didnt really follow the story.

    • Baby

      HOLD ME

    • Sherbet

      Silly question. OF COURSE it was lrh who invented everything, including bodies.

      • Missionary Kid

        Two hours later, I posted the same thing, before I read your comment. GMTA.

    • Baby

      UHM .. Lady GAGA.. Wait..

      That guy from Silence of the Lambs that kept that Bitch with the dog in the hole..

    • grundoon

      You know spacation – you know how to get into and out of the MEST universe. Now, uh… you just have to be able to handle space. If you can handle space why you can get in and out of the MEST universe like mad because this MEST universe is a very temporary affair. It’s very ramshackle. It’s built out of cards, it’s built out of old decayed energy that was dumped in here. And it exists in these large masses. And then people come in and they say, “Oh, goodie, goodie! Look at all that building material, and let’s build something out of it.” …

      They gotta have this body like you gotta have a card to get into a war plant. They walk around with this body and they shove it up to the grocer. And they shove it up to the bank teller, and they draw their money and get their rations, and so forth. Uh… it’s a handy identification card. It’s a little bit destructable for identification, a little bit heavy for an identification card. You can make an identification card with a couple of ounces, or an ounce, or a fifth of an ounce. You don’t have to have one that weighs 150 lbs. But, uh… well, people go to extremes in this universe that’s all, particularly in America they go to extremes on all these things. They… want big, powerful, strong identification cards. But you can’t quite get through your mind what you want these identification cards to do. But the identification card does furnish randomity. It permits a fellow to make a living so he can feed the identification card. And it permits the identification card to get tired, and to get happy, and to get sad, and have an emotional life, which a fellow can stand alongside of and pretend that he is not putting the emotion there to feel back.

      PDC-01 OPENING: WHAT IS TO BE DONE IN COURSE
      A lecture given by L. Ron Hubbard on 1 December 1952

    • JJ

      I did it. I kept dropping my beer so I figured I needed cup holders for my body and the idea of hands just came to me… “You’re welcome.”

    • Missionary Kid

      Doesn’t she know who invented bodies? It was the Hubster, in a previous life.

  • Baby

    Max just asked me.. and Cent.. to post the picture of me jumping out of the cake.. So please don’t stone me..
    Oh now you can see Mac behind me.. ( That is the night we fell in love.. dated for a year and

    met 30 years later ( Still in love with each other but didn’t know ) https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/e9ed871a80a9703a2b6ac353e3ab99835892e945d9813b45bff4536e02a14c3a.jpg and soon married afterwards.. )

    • DangDadgummit

      wow!!!!!!!

      • Baby

        Dang.. Thank you.. I was a baby ..sigh .. trying to put myself through college with 2 babies to feed.

        Why oh Why wasn’t I a Stripper..? errrrgh..

        • DangDadgummit

          You woulda made a fortune, movie star gorgeous !!!

          • Baby

            OH MY GAWWWWWD.. HAHHAHAHA .. you are cute Dang.. xo

            • DangDadgummit

              best legs ever *blushing* beet red

            • Baby

              I think I remember them Dang.. xo

    • April

      Wowza!

      • Baby

        I jumped out of a cake for this guy who was retiring ( sitting down)

        I honestly never wore bikinis back then because I thought I was too fat.. Ahhhh ” Youth is wasted on the young..”

        • April

          You were fat alright. Fat in allllll the right places, if you get my drift. 😉

          • Baby

            Wink Wink..haha

        • Juicer77

          Sigh 🙂

          • Baby

            I know… : )

    • Sherbet

      Holy smokes!

      • Baby

        Girl you’ve seen this before.. ha.. I wish it were clearer.. sigh.. I don’t think I tried to make it clearer on Picnick.. I love it because First the guys are in Polyester .. but Mac is with me..

        • Sherbet

          I don’t remember ever seeing it. Man, my waist was bigger than that when I was in first grade.

          • Baby

            I was the white Oprah.. skinny.. chubby.. heavy.. thinner.. skinny.. chubby .. heavy thinner..

            Now I’m happy on Porky Pig..hahahhahahaha..

            • Sherbet

              I hear ya. Size 8, 10, 14, 16, 12, 10, and the music goes round and round.

            • Baby

              YEP.. I do have a variety of sizes in my closet though.. xo

        • Marshall

          That is sweet – gives me hope that there really are people that are in love. Even us “old” folks 🙂

          • Baby

            Especially us old folks Marsh.. Ha..

    • Jimmy3

      The night Mac earned the name Mac. His name was Gerald before that.

      • Baby

        hahahha .. I am like peeing my pants

        • Sherbet

          It must be a nice feeling to know how much you are loved here in the Bunker, my dear.

          • Jimmy3

            I only hate you a little bit, if that helps.

            • Sherbet

              That really does help, Jimmy. Now I don’t feel guilty for planning to kick your A$$ when I meet you for the first time.

            • Jimmy3

              That’d be funny if I weren’t already afraid of you.

            • Sherbet

              That’s sweet. Gimme some sugar. And watch your back.

          • Baby

            Sherb.. Some days are better than others..hahhahhaa…

            and you have the honor of knowing that Howdy loved you best.. xo

    • flyonthewall

      the harlot of Florida must be stoned

      • Baby

        I think I was stoned back then actually..

      • Rasha

        Totally, dude….

      • Sherbet

        Jeb, is that you?

    • Rasha

      Wow. Please post cake recipe.

      • Sherbet

        The sad part is that the retiree died of a heart attack minutes after that picture was taken. But he died smiling.

        • Rasha

          minutes???

          • Sherbet

            It was either the shock of seeing a half-nekkid Baby, or toxic fumes from the polyester.

      • Baby
    • chukicita

      Hottie!

      • Baby

        Awww chuck .. lifetime ago.. xo

        • chukicita

          whaaat? Girl, I know that was like last week. I think you were born hot.

          • Baby

            ha

    • Kestrel

      Yowza!

      • Baby

        tee hee.. Haven’t heard that since the 1920s ..xo

  • Intergalactic Walrus

    Nothing quite says “ROCKSTAR” like a $25 Walgreen’s gift card and a half dozen vending machine munchies.
    And I’d check the expiration date on those crackers…
    (refresh)

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5eddfa3952ab87d3fced14f3f386e57dff1ab774a392b9d2a1907402e4d789d0.png
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/81fb99f8ed2eb169e1d3d235cf5e439709cf52054238505c2069a9465a688470.jpg

    • Sherbet

      “Commendation Considered” Tessa Bessio and…that other guy whose name I can’t read.

    • Supper Powers

      Tampons and toilet paper.

    • Sibs

      Sad to see the bounty of stuff in that basket… and lack thereof.

      • Sherbet

        Peanut butter and cheez crackers! Why, it’s almost impossible to find peanut butter and cheez crackers anywhere nowadays! Awesome!

        • Sibs

          They got plenty of those in the vending machines at my new job.

          • Sherbet

            And everywhere else. I was being facetious about what a lame gift basket that is.

          • Missionary Kid

            I hope you’re getting better pay, and it’s closer to what you eventually want to do.

    • Rasha

      They have to split that right? Wonder if it comes down to a snarling “Hunger Games” over the Cheez-Its….

    • A ‘major IAS donation cycle’ would be at least $100,000 I would think. Thanks kids. Here’s your $25 and a stale treat.

    • JJ

      Jesus, we scammed the most people outa the most money and all we got was a lousy selection of cheese crackers, Walgreens gift certificates and a box of herbal teas (dated 2009) in a dog bed.
      Do I or do I not see a package of shoelaces?

    • Observer

      Tessa looks like she’s about to have a major breakdown.

  • Observer

    Hey guise!!!1!1 On eBay I found an elusive perfect copy of a macro lens which I have seen described as legendary, and was priced right, and it got here today. After I finished the taxes I went out a-macroing. SO worth every penny. The macro tubes work great but aren’t really good for out-and-abouting. This lens is.

    Please join me in my happy dance!

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/635933310a891d5710e5cbc0e6bf0b6047a42c56a31d97b4df80f2e0516a343a.jpg

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/10c356c3c9529e8ba5d19f5969673e4e3e577ac7aee4bcc5e90b40ac76de9c28.jpg

    • Sherbet

      Lilac or hyacinth?

      • Observer

        Lilac

        • Sherbet

          I can smell them from here. Gorgeous pictures.

          • Observer

            Thank you! I was ecstatic when I saw how well they came out.

            • Sherbet

              See? You’re not just a shoopmaster. You’re an artist. If I made prints of all your pictures that touch me, I’d have no more room on my office walls.

            • Sherb, where did you make prints? Walgreens is all I can think of. Serious question.

            • Sherbet

              Yes, Walgreen’s. Actually, Observer is the one who directed me there. They do a nice job, and it’s not really expensive.

            • Cool. Thank you!

    • flyonthewall
    • Supper Powers
    • Amazing photos.

      • Observer

        Thank you!

    • Jimmy3

      I hate to say this, but I think you got scammed. I dunno what a macro lens is, but that looks like a dandelion. I could’ve sent you a pile for free.

    • JJ

      Whoa God. makes up for the smell on the bus on the way home. And I mean that!

    • “After I finished the taxes ….”
      Wait, what?

      • Observer

        Yeah. They’re not actually due till tomorrow.

        • Missionary Kid

          They’re due tonight, by midnight.

    • So happy for you! Amazing shots.

    • Mrs. B ( noseinabk)

      Love them!

    • Juicer77

      🙂

  • Intergalactic Walrus
    • flyonthewall

      smh. You know that guy’s a hoarder

      • Jimmy3

        You know he is. Because the only other person on Earth who owns and displays a Steve Garvey bobblehead is Steve Garvey.

        • Observer

          Ouch!

        • Off to find a bobblehead of me.
          Must have.
          And candy coated almonds.
          And ribs.

          • WhiteCentauress

            3D printer. I saw Howard and Raj make action figures of themselves. 😁👍

          • Missionary Kid

            It’s right above your shoulders. [Sorry, couldn’t resist]. 😉

            • I can’t believe you would mock someone with Parkinson’s.

            • Missionary Kid

              I’m not Trump. If you have Parkinson’s, it doesn’t show up in the photograph.

      • Observer

        Definitely not a duster.

      • Intergalactic Walrus

        No, if he was a hoarder it would be on the kitchen floor, sitting in a hat box filled with Pez dispensers, next to a broken toaster, buried under a layer of dog hair and Big Mac wrappers. I’ve seen that show 😉

        • flyonthewall

          he just hasn’t posted that pic yet. It exists

    • Sherbet

      I’ll say it, because nobody else did: “Life sized?”

      • Rasha

        ShhhhhBAP!!!

    • WhiteCentauress

      I want an L Ron Hubbard dart board.

    • chukicita

      Is that an official Coca-Cola tchotchke?

      • Intergalactic Walrus

        Usually the ballpark give-away nights are sponsored and the sponsor’s name is printed on the swag, so I’d say yes.

        • chukicita

          So somebody at Coca-Cola marketing had to green light this design. I bet that meeting was fun!

      • iampissed

        Is that how you spell tchotchkes….never mind came up after treed letters, im good.

  • flyonthewall

    cannot.stop.eating.candy coated.Easter.almonds

    I’m gonna throw up

    • Rasha

      MOAR ROOM FOR ALMONDS!!!!!!!

      • flyonthewall

        they’re delicious but so filling *moan*

        • Rasha

          But they’re Easter Coated®, so yeah…..

    • JJ

      you been at a wedding?

      • Sherbet

        Right. At an Italian wedding, we call them “confetti.”

    • LRH said “what turns it on, turns it off”. Keep eating pal.

      • iampissed

        You made me snort out loud.

    • daisy

      Go for it , then you can eat them again. Highly recommended by Fat beagle .

      • Rasha

        LOL!!!

      • iampissed

        Dox….no not really.

    • Then there will be room for more.
      Wow, I never heard of candy coated almonds.
      Must have.
      Off to search for candy coated almonds.
      And ribs.

      • WhiteCentauress

        Cracker Barrel….usually called “Jordan Almonds”….bet you can’t eat just one.

        • iampissed

          You beat me to it…and hell no you can’t.

      • flyonthewall

        what centauress said

        • iampissed

          Jordan Almonds one of my favs, quite addictive.

      • WhiteCentauress
        • chukicita

          *drool*

      • iampissed

        This ribs thing sure has some legs today…a lot like baby.

      • Supper Powers

        I’m still nekid so I can help you out with the ribs.

        • I broke a rib during sex once.
          True story.

          • Supper Powers

            Let me give you my number. 🙂

          • grundoon

            Damn trapezes.

      • Robert Eckert

        My goodness how did you get to near my age and never experience candied almonds?

  • JJ

    Gah, because he was a writer! Writers think up names write down dialogue story lines on post it notes and telephone books for future use. So he had a Mount Xenu and then he formed a little cult and thought Ah Xenu, I like the sound of that.
    Everything other worldly has to have a zee sound in it apparently. I wonder, would the religion have ever taken off if Hubbard had named his evil overlord Fuggle, or Bumstuts, or jar jar ? Evil Interstellar Galactical Over Lord Penis-swizzle probably would have been a non-starter too.

    • Jimmy3

      When I’m only glancing at the screen, your avatar tricks me, and there’s about a half second where I think your comment is still loading. And I’m really confused.

      • JJ

        Dude, I’m always still loading…

        • daisy

          I am always loaded

    • Harpoona Frittata

      Probably not, but when it came to space alien races, like the Marcabians and Farsecans, he could just as easily have called them Framoolians and Octangoans…folks would have chumped for that, don’t you think?

      • JJ

        Definitely Framoolians, but Octangoans has one too many syllables. I think people get annoyed when you make stuff up and it takes too long to say it. Romulans Yes, Vulcans Yes, Jedi yes,
        Lord Xenu yes. Lord Hoomstanophishaliarn… not so much…

    • chukicita

      I think he was a li’l xenophobic.

    • grundoon

      LRH saved the best names for OT IX, X and XI and they are confidential. Here in public you must never speak the name of Lord Penis-swizzle.

  • exccla

    Maybe he forgot he’d already used that ‘cool’ name elsewhere. Don’t know why he used it in his ‘magnificent, award winning script ‘ Revolt in the Stars.’

  • Baby

    OK Off to airport.. I am literally shaking…I am so excited! xoxo love baby

    • Rasha

      SQUEEE!!!

    • Jimmy3

      Awww. Don’t be so nervous, babe. Unless it’s United… It’s not United, is it?

      • Rasha

        …good point.

      • Baby

        I would be rich if they were dragged off of the plane Jimmy.

    • iampissed

      You do know they can smell excited.

      • Baby

        Yes that is true.. I should hide the Scent pissed..

  • outraged

    He used ‘CC’ for both Clearing Course and Celebrity Centre.
    No WONDER I can never get the bloody acronyms straight. Neither did Hubbard!!!

    https://youtu.be/j1zy9MW8CkA

  • What’sup
    • JJ

      Um i think it is a lizard and the joke is racist in intent?

      • Jimmy3

        Or it was just a hilarious, opportunistic joke without any hatred behind it. We will have to study it.

        • daisy

          Oh good I was ashamed that I laughed. It is okay because I came from Asia , Ontario. It is a lovely sleepy town

          • What’sup

            Jinx.

        • JJ

          I still can’t find “Asian Lizard”

          • Jimmy3

            Oh… Dammit. I know a site. I can’t link it here tho.

            • What’sup

              I think it’s okay. That particular site is advertised in the header.

              On my screen anyway.

          • WhiteCentauress

            Try “giant Chinese salamander”

        • Rasha

          This is with the “OMG! Gas is only 89 cents???” comments, where the gas sign is way in the background, behind the hot chick, crashed car or elephant in the foreground of the picture. This is one of the hallmarks of humor. To extract one detail from the overall view and apply it to what is expected from the general…. oh never mind….

          I laughed. That was funny.

          • Jimmy3

            And one could argue that it’s more self-deprecating than outwardly offensive.

      • What’sup

        It’s okay, im from Asia…..you can relax.

      • Supper Powers

        Or hyperbolic.

    • WhiteCentauress
    • GrangerFX

      That’s funny. I thought they were referring to the In ‘n Out.

  • Intergalactic Walrus
    • daisy

      I would do that even before I read the letter.

      • chukicita

        Half a heartbeat.

    • WhiteCentauress

      My question about negative IQ’s has been answered. What an idiot.

    • Observer

      Oy

    • madame duran

      Trump cares so much about the well-being of those little people* who helped make him wealthy, that he:
      – tried to take away the health care benefits they depend on
      – made access to the president a paid affair that only the rich can afford
      – cheats them by not paying full price for services rendered
      – vilifies entire religious groups and divides families with no apology

      *(Did Trump become wealthy through his own motivations or did others help him to become wealthy? Are we to believe his greed and desire for personal gain suddenly disappeared?)

      Leah exposes Scientology abuses and her motivation is pegged at “making money”.
      Trump secures wealth for himself and his wealthy business/political cronies yet his motivation is deemed to be selfless duty.

      I just can’t.

  • Missionary Kid

    Jenna Elfbrain is going to be on a show on Spike TV this evening. Adam Carolla and Friends Build Stuff Live is the show

    The guide says,Season 1 Episode 5 “Garage Rescue” Adam and actress Jenna Elfman go over all things garage-related: Adam answers home- and build-related questions.

    • daisy

      Adam makes me angry. He made such a big deal about

      • Rasha

        …and then… she was gone…… O.o

        • daisy

          This %^$^%^%E&$% new computer . It has frozen on me for hrs , and tonight just stopped typing in the middle of a comment . Of course I have no idea what I was saying. Oh well that is not a bad thing usually.

          • Rasha

            …you said “%^$^%^%E&$%” … naughty. Anyway, it’s after 8:00. I certainly ain’t keeping records……

          • Missionary Kid

            Sometimes, Disuqes does that to me. I have to wait it out. If it keeps up, I reboot.

    • WhiteCentauress

      Hopefully she will do another AMA.

    • madame duran

      This is the second time Adam Corolla has hosted Jenna Elfman in a short time period (within 2 months or less, I believe).

  • Intergalactic Walrus

    Regarding Aaron’s video…
    I mentioned this before but a while back I saw a clam asking for tax advice because the friend who did his taxes had just joined the Sea Org. I clicked on the friend’s profile and was surprised to see that he looked 70+ yrs old. His wife had recently died and he had posted her “farewell letter” after she passed.

    She said that she had a stroke, her body was deteriorating and she was ready to go. Very sad. She also said that she was going to come back as a baby boy in Australia (they lived in Florida). In comments, other clams also referenced that they would be seeing her again in Australia as a baby boy. I thought this was really creepy. Now, based on what Aaron said about dying clams meeting with expectant parents, I realize that this was probably the case. It’s mind blowing and even creepier than I thought. SMH

    • iampissed

      Yea….it feels like there may be some com lines (I hate doing that) backstage for arranged
      deaths….I don’t know.

      • Intergalactic Walrus

        Can you imagine? I’d want to look into my baby’s eyes and rejoice in the arrival of the new life that I’ve created. Not think that it was old Mr/Mrs X being recycled. As a wog, I just don’t get the appeal of this.

        • madame duran

          Can you imagine someone who was evicted or was homeless then deciding to force themselves into your home because they “needed a place to live”? One person’s idea of “cause over MEST” by invading a foreign body is another’s idea of demon possession. I’m not here to discern the logic of this belief but it won’t stop me from saying how creepy and hostile this makes out Scientology to be.

          • Intergalactic Walrus

            I wonder if money ever figures into this. A dying person would be an easy target to get taken advantage of in this quest to be re-born. “You do want your new meat body to have the very best don’t you? So, what about those stock certificates, I’ve heard you mention…”

    • downtherabbithole

      So much sadness when it comes to COS that tomorrows root canal seems like a walk in the park

      • Supper Powers

        I never like going to the dentist but have found a guy I adore. He and his assistant had me laughing through every procedure the last few weeks. I appreciated how hilarious and kind they were especially when they knew I was uneasy. I even sent the whole staff lunch to tell them so. It makes all the difference when you like your dentist’s personality. Good luck, darlin.

        • downtherabbithole

          Thank you Supper – the staff are very nice, it’s the aftermath I do handle well. Sigh….

          • Supper Powers

            I hear you. I was on the floor crying and cursing his name for a few days after. Clove oil may help you. Not me. I’m a wimp and will whine if I get a paper cut. Hopefully we will hear from you tomorrow after you have had a shot of whiskey or two.

            • downtherabbithole

              Or three of four !!!

            • Sherbet

              My experience with root canals: The anticipation is always worse than the reality. I never felt a thing, during or after.

            • downtherabbithole

              I want the name of your dentist – will travel

            • Sherbet

              You’ll be fine. You’ll get plenty of Novocain.

            • Jimmy3

              Screw Novocain. Demand the nitrous. You get to be a fighter pilot for at least a half hour.

            • Sherbet

              I’m always worried what I say under nitrous. It’s such a strange feeling to be so out of control. I could be revealing private information such as, “Grrblemfflstffn.” I’m sure that’s what I said last time.

            • downtherabbithole

              Out of control works for me. Bring on the nitrous

            • Jimmy3

              Last time I had it for a procedure, I had on the nitrous mask and the standard plastic safety glasses. And he’s actually sawing into my jawbone. Which I’m sure is supposed to be uncomfortable. But in my head I’m going, “Pew! pew! pew pew!! Pew! pew! Red 3! Red 3! Mig on my six! I can’t shake em!” And all the sudden, all I can see is a horror movie-esque spurt of blood spatter on my glasses. He stops what he’s doing to wipe them off, apologizes, and went back to it. I cared about absolutely none of this. Didn’t feel it, didn’t care. I was right back to, “Do a barrel roll! Yeah!”

              Get the nitrous. You’ll be fine.

            • downtherabbithole

              Jimmy there are time that you actually scare. This is one of them.

            • Jimmy3

              April Fools!

            • downtherabbithole

              You too funny young man

            • Ann B Watson

              Jimmy3, I like your posts but ask me about the guide wire every time I have a surgical breast biopsy and I have had three in my side brefore the operation, As bad as a Sec check & lasts longer. Really stinks! I like your posts. 💛💖

              .

            • Jimmy3

              Sorry to hear that, but glad you’re around to talk about it. And you’re very sweet.

            • Only hurts in your wallet nowadays.

    • OOkpik

      I knew someone who really believed that her new puppy was her recently deceased daughter. She wasn’t even a Scientologist.
      Very sad.

      • Intergalactic Walrus

        Yeah but there is a big difference. If the people at her local church knew about this delusion, they would probably try to get her some help to deal with this. If she was a clam her “church” would consider this a “win” 🙁

      • daisy

        mmm Maybe that is why Fat beagle doesn*t care for me. I wonder which dead family member she is .

        • Juicer77

          ROFL

    • 3feetback-of-COS

      And when it turns out that the past life theory is bullshit, its uh-oh, you just wasted your one and only life.

    • grundoon

      What if… what if you were walking down the street, and… and you got halfway across the street, and you had your body down there in the middle of the street, and it was walking from curb to curb, and a fire engine came around and you didn’t even happen to notice it; you were a long way away. And all of a sudden, crash. You didn’t have any body anymore. And you could go to the hospital if you wanted to, and pick up this kid that was going to die anyway, and he wasn’t in bad shape, and there’s another thetan there, in a kind of a stupid state of mind, so you tell him “Oh, go on back to Mars, another implant won’t hurt you.”

      PDC-62 YOUR OWN CASE
      A Lecture given by L. Ron Hubbard on 18 December 1952

  • daisy

    I am off to the grocery store to replace the 2 bunnies and 3 Cadbury eggs my siblings gave mom before she gets home tomorrow. I meant to stop at the ears . I knew my mom would understand that, I didn*t know bunnies had ears until I was 10. Oh and I have to pick up some chocolate ex-lax to get rid of the other chocolate .

  • downtherabbithole

    Is tomorrow the day the city of Clearwater votes on COS “big” plans?

    I have a flawed memory, and have vague memory of Trout Run having a council meeting as well in April.

    • Sherbet

      The 20th I think.

      • iampissed

        Think your right.

      • downtherabbithole

        Well hell I am sure something happens tomorrow, just wish I could remember what.

        • iampissed

          Tony has out a new article…..that’s it right.

      • Observer

        So, then…Hitler’s birthday.

        • Sherbet

          Synergy.

        • Robert Eckert

          4/20 is often celebrated in a different way

  • Tony Ortega

    Observer, did I show you this one? Macro lens on my Samsung smartphone, of all things. Near the pyramids in Mexico a few years ago. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/9e756a72be938437a47d7c85a6d09deea62d170fa2d4bba7ea6f6dfc136b618d.jpg

    • downtherabbithole

      Think I need a new phone

      • Sherbet

        I think I need some Raid.

        • daisy

          You extra funny today .

          • Sherbet

            I’m still on a chocolate high. I’ll be depressed and cranky tomorrow, and you can take over.

    • Jimmy3

      Damn that came out well. I usually take my selfies in the bathroom mirror like a regular schlub.

      • daisy

        howl

      • Rasha

        …aim higher…. just sayin’…. 😉

        • Yeah, I’m sick of those kneecap shots.

    • Rasha

      KITTEH!!!!

      • Supper Powers

        Best laugh of the day!

      • daisy

        stop it . I have to post LOL after every comment. From now on I will hold my laughs til the program is finished.

        • Rasha

          *shnuggle*

    • Rasha

      *TACKLE HUG!!!*

    • Kestrel

      Beautiful.

    • Observer

      Whoa, that’s amazing! Beautiful spider. That’s a decent lens too.

    • PerpetualOutflow

      Wow, can’t believe you captured that image with a smart phone. Spectacular!

    • Not a fan of spiders. Impressive shot though.

      I want to see your cats photo with that lense.
      Please and thank you.

      • Rasha

        KITTEH!!!

      • What’sup

        I got bitten by a Redback a month or so ago. I still don’t mind spiders tho.

        • That’s sweet. Insects and reptiles better stay the Fuck 10 miles away from me though.
          And their rodent friends.

        • Taffy Sinclair

          I got bitten by a redneck a month or so ago. I needed an anti-crystal meth antidote shot. Hurts a lot.

          • daisy

            I didn*t think rednecks believed in foreplay .

    • Wow.

    • Paul V. Tupointeau

      WHAT A BEAUTIFUL SPIDER !!!

      http://m.popkey.co/3e7c75/Q8Od8_s-200×150.gif

      😉

    • Kay (aka Nasty Lady)

      Wow……just…..wow.

    • Juicer77

      GAH

  • Intergalactic Walrus
    • iampissed

      No long term commitment….snort.

    • Jimmy3

      “Spy Week” at Delphi camp is actually 365 days long.

    • Jimmy3

      It’s not *really* a concentration camp. They’re just doing their TRs.

    • daisy

      If is productive it ain*t fun.

    • downtherabbithole

      Once again speechless. My head hurts from shaking.

    • What’sup

      This one time, at clam camp. I stuck a homemade plastic silencer in my……….

    • JJ

      The summer camp listings edition of the Inlander came out… They have a session for kids to learn cursive handwriting. before it becomes, we’ll cursive handwriting…

    • Mrs. B ( noseinabk)
      • Jimmy3

        Welcome to the Bunker! Would you be willing to fill out a quick survey?

        • Mrs. B ( noseinabk)

          Hmmm. What a strange request. Depends if it’s a Combs, Dawson or Harvey survey.

    • EmmaDaoust

      OSA internship.

  • flyonthewall
  • daisy

    Crap the liquor store was out of chocolate rabbits and eggs. Oh well vodka it is , I do not think she will notice.

    • downtherabbithole

      Damn Daisy, I am so wishing my daughter has your kind of spunk when the time comes

    • Ann B Watson

      Daisy Tonight I love you because you are so Fantastic. Honestly your posts are golden, thank you.💛

      • daisy

        That is a lovely compliment thank you . Trump has spoiled the word golden for me . ( that has 2 possible interpretations – I meant the dirty one )

        • Ann B Watson

          Daisy Trump is heir hair to the golden touch. I Love You Daisy .

          • daisy

            <3<3<4

        • WhiteCentauress

          Psssst…Daisy….I got it. 😉

    • Taffy Sinclair

      There’s marshmallow-flav’d vodker, & choco flav’d. Do it!!

  • Intergalactic Walrus
  • Mick Roberts

    Off-topic (or a day late, and possibly already posted):

    A revealing analysis into the cherry-picked numbers of Narconon’s bullshit claims of “success”…

    https://www.cs.cmu.edu/~dst/Narconon/studies.htm

    • WhiteCentauress

      “…it shows a remarkably careless use of statistics.” Nailed it! Good article.

  • Michael Rosnoski

    is ron miscavige going on the Joe rogan podcast ?
    this was just uploaded

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iSUH2RG-DVk&t=0s

    • Tony Ortega

      Keeping a close eye on Scientology’s smear sites, are ya?

      • Jimmy3

        He could’ve just seen it mentioned on Twitter, or stumbled on it on YouTube at the right time. I’m sure you’re already aware, but for everyone else, Ron Miscavige did tweet about being on the show tomorrow. 1:30 PM PST

      • Michael Rosnoski

        no I just subscribe to some of there youtube channels to laugh at some of the stuff that gets uploaded

  • Taffy Sinclair

    Just got home from Las Vegas! Nice to be home back east; wish I coulda stayed longer. But I missed Scientology Cat. His “clear”-ass was not home when I got home home!!!

    It took him 3 hours to come home & meow @ the door!! I am shocked at these out-ethics!!!

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/87fba5a15daf0beae69c57657e97aa5ed57b9ac37d0c0e9731c874fcbfea2375.jpg

    • Todd Tomorrow

      How much wealthier are you?

  • downtherabbithole

    Good night all. Sleep well, best wishes, and sweet dreams.

    • downtherabbithole

      Jimmy – your comments are going to give me hellacious nightmares tonight.

      Quote: “Last time I had it for a procedure, I had on the nitrous mask and the standard plastic safety glasses. And he’s actually sawing into my jawbone.”

      Love you no less though

      • Jimmy3

        I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have been so blunt with that. But in defense, he was supposed to be doing that. I didn’t mean to imply that he was screwing up. He was extremely competent, and I even checked his wallet for a WISE membership card. He’s clean.

      • outraged

        Ugh! Now I read that. 😉

  • GrangerFX
    • I suppose Xenu is an archetypal (if melodramatic) media villain and he’s going to get that treatment.

      It’s interesting that the descriptions given of ‘close encounters’ with UFOs and extra-terrestrials closely follow the cinematic representations of the time, and have evolved from ordinary humanoids in silver suits to more extravagant creatures with the development of CGI.

      Fringe beliefs and popular culture feed back into each other.

  • Kaarli Makela

    It may be that LRH was ‘crazy’ … a misfit and dreamer by temperment, but there is now a very credible theory that fits with his specific apparent quirks and characteristics … it has to do with a specific type of epileptic condition … see if you agree, here:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hUdcLUN3JpE&t=2343s

    • Kay (aka Nasty Lady)

      Interesting, and could be part of the picture, but these same symptoms also show up a lot in bipolar disorder during the manic stage, and also in some psychotic disorders such as schizophrenia, severe OCD, psychotic depression, narcissism, sociopathy, etc. I don’t think having temporal epilepsy would cover all of the other delusional and irrational things he did nor his actions that hurt adults and children in particular, without having any sense of guilt about it. If TLE was present, it would contribute to his overall pathology, whatever it was. He exhibited a wide range of possible psychiatric diagnoses…who knows at this point. Whatever it was, the end result was a legacy of causing a lot of suffering in other people down through the present time.

      • Kaarli Makela

        I agree, and admit I freely read-into his early upbringing, just given the homey ‘pre-natal trauma’ scenarios in Dianetics … then I saw some of the daily Affirmations Hubbard wrote for himself! He-Man Woman Hater! What a home-life he must have had!
        An extremely flawed character who did not need to get worse via a brain issue … but there must have been enough of a ‘perfect storm’ for him to get big toe into the pages of history … under the category of Infamy!

  • Kay (aka Nasty Lady)

    OK….just so I can overtly make a bid for sympathy…here is my sad tale. There are many many cat lovers on this site. I love all of the cats..from afar. (allergic) Once in awhile I will agree to cat-sit for friends if they can’t find anyone else. Something always goes awry…every single time. (Is that a cat thing? Seriously I want to know….I’ve only owned dogs)

    Well…tonight the cat I was watching got out…she is not an outside cat, she is tres urban and is declawed to boot. and I am in the mountains in a remote area with predators galore. This cat is everything to it’s owner. So I went out with high-powered flashlights, bushwhacking through trees, undergrowth, etc. in the pitch black. After two hours I was nigh unto hysterical so I called in reinforcements (friends) to help me. We are grid searching. (kitty has no claws so we didn’t check trees) It is freezing outside. After a long time, we reconvene at my house to consider a new strategy….we are all ripped up from going through the brush and trees, cold and tired and no one wants to call the owner to tell her that her Kitty is MIA in the wild. THEN…..suddenly little Miss Kitty just calmly strolls up the walk and through my open door as if she had gone to some soiree and was merely returning home to request a hot bath and a spot of tea. I didn’t know whether to hug her or strangle her. Is this what it is like to own a cat?

    • Liberated

      Yes !

      • Kay (aka Nasty Lady)

        Wow…..I just thought I had bad luck every time I agreed to cat sit. Now I know….

        • Liberated

          I’ve had cats forever.
          Cats do not do well outside their own environment, even when their family moves to new home it’s very hard for them to adjust. Cats are set in their ways, and the older they are the more that’s true.
          Consider yourself lucky to have the little bugger return to you, and the way she “strolled ” in……well, so typical. 🙂

          • Kay (aka Nasty Lady)

            I am so grateful she came back, I can’t even adequately express how much. I don’t think I will cat sit anymore. That sounds very logical to me that cats could get so thrown by new environments. I hate to say no to friends, but truly every time I have had to extricate the guest cat from some unbelievable place I didn’t even know about, worry about red hawk attacks, (had one incident) have to check my engines in the closed garage because I can’t find the guest cat and I’m worried it is sleeping on the engine block because it’s cold here. I think it would be easier for the owners to pay someone to just check on the cat in it’s own home. I’d be willing to do that for free, but won’t do anymore cat sitting, it’s too stressful for the cat and for me.

            • Juicer77

              Glad she is ok, silly girl. Sorry you got such a scare. If it stresses you out then calmly say no, or insist that kitty be kept inside under your watch. Having a room to herself (eta in where own home) with all the amenities and a nice, secure window to look through is perfectly reasonable while the family is traveling. Less stress for everyone!

            • Kay (aka Nasty Lady)

              Good suggestions….I am just so clueless regarding cats having had only doggies.

            • Juicer77

              Longtime professional cat carer/dog walker here. 🙂 Also many kitty fosters over the years. Always happy to help answer questions if I can.

    • TheLurkingHorror

      Hug her (from afar). 😉

      • Kay (aka Nasty Lady)

        She’s a cute thing…..I shall hug her from afar. I was so upset when I couldn’t find her that I was literally shaking. This cat is literally the sun and the moon to her owner. I understand that because that’s how I am about my dogs. All ended well, thank heavens. I’m used to dogs coming when you call..calling over and over again into the darkness to no avail was something I don’t want to ever do again. Your imagination just goes wild. (especially in the dark)

        • Kay (aka Nasty Lady)

          PPS Love your avi

        • TheLurkingHorror

          Cats will sometimes come if you shake a food box or treat box. Of course, if their favorite treat is canned food, that’s a little difficult. 🙂

    • TexasBroad

      It is, yes. Go make her a tea and when you come back I will tell you about when my cat-sitting coworker DID call to tell me my sweet Tonkinese had escaped and they hadn’t seen him in two days. I was heartbroken. A few weeks later, she shared that her little boy was so traumatized that he was making up stories that Fugi came out of the wall and slept with him at night. Sure enough, kitty was lIving in the wall space the whole time…sneaking through a drywall hole in the closet to eat (I guess…he still looked healthy) and to snuggle in with little Joey.

      • Kay (aka Nasty Lady)

        Oh my HELL !!!!! Seriously ???? THAT is an amazing story. I wonder what he was eating? And drinking? (probably toilet or sink water…..I’ve had my guest cats do that despite fresh water in stainless steel bowls) I can only imagine how your coworker felt having to tell you that. I was so panicked I considered just leaving the country with no forwarding address. Your story reminds me of a news story I vaguely remember about a cat that escaped in the cargo hold of a commercial jet and lived in the crawl spaces of the jet for awhile. Cats are resourceful, dogs not so much. They just bark and whine until a human feeds/waters them. They are not that subtle. You could write a little children’s book about that…. “Fugi and Joey, a cat’s tale”

    • TheMirrorThetan

      Yeah they do that casual strolling home thing.
      I live on a main road.
      I have mine trained to stay in the backyard but when they first come to live with me they have done that
      My previous cat did that to me and I was so upset when they came back that it scared the fuck out of them and they never left the yard again. As a bonus I was hysterically bashing the padlocked gate trying to get it open and I smashed this golf-ball size cyst I had on my wrist and it never came back. LOL. So they did me a favour escaping out the yard.

      • Kay (aka Nasty Lady)

        That’s funny about the cyst, although I bet that hurt. I understand being that upset, this wasn’t even my cat and frankly I was hysterical after the first hour. That’s impressive that your cats never left the yard again. Living on a main road would have made a screaming banshee out of me if I had been in that situation because of the risk. Whew.

    • Ann B Watson

      Lovely tale about cats. They are so incredible & all my kitties have left paw prints on my heart. My doggies too. Love four footed spirits so much. ❤️

    • califa007

      My declawed cats were always able to climb trees, the absence of claws a minor hindrance. Since I learned that declawing is actually an amputation of the first joint, I no longer declaw. This has made my life very difficult, indeed.

    • Ann B Watson

      Yes it is what it is like to be a parent to cats. But Miss Ann has always had a plan for this, when younger I brought up my kitten & doggie together from the get go and they adored each other their whole lives. When my current inside Jade Cat has to depart she is 18 now, I believe I will get a rescue dog & cat already trained, spade and out of kitten doggie period. That is such a wonderful time but @65 an older kitty & doggie will be better. 💖

  • TheMirrorThetan

    Thanks Aaron. I love your videos. Always learn something new.
    Jeez is that creepy or what, that the family expecting a baby meets the dying person and makes a thetan rehoming agreement. Yuck.

  • Still_On_Your_Side

    Aaron, I cannot fathom why a pregnant scientology couple would ever agree to a request from a dying scientologist to inhabit their newborn baby’s body. Suppose the dying member is an under the radar critic of Hubbard and the criticism came to light after the birth of the child? Given the draconian disconnection policies instituted by Miscavige, what do the parents do? Clearly, no sane parent would disconnect from a newborn for past life sins, no matter how committed a scientologist they are. The problems that could arise from a belief that dying humans can reserve a spot in newborn babies are too convoluted and bizarre to even think about.

    Leah Remini talks about baby Suri crying on the floor of the ladies room during the Cruise-Holmes wedding while adult women lectured her on deportment. The concept of adults doing this is chilling. Have you seen scenes like this?

    • Todd Tomorrow

      ‘lectured her on deportment’?

    • Ann B Watson

      Hi. Still on your side I saw your comment, thank you. I have to add yes what you wrote is the True Face of the Cult of Scientology. Chilling, Killing and the Lies pour out even more so now that Leah, Mike & all of us smash the hammer down and break the anvil. Years ago in Sea Org I was at a briefing where I was told Scientology is the anvil & it cannot be broken. Believed that then with my life. Now I just put a blow torch to the anvil & it melts into a puddle of molten bs. ❤️💛

  • Todd Tomorrow
    • Liberated

      What hypocrites….they make me sick.
      Follow the money.

    • Ann B Watson

      ❤️❤️

  • Andrew Robertson

    OT ** Warning to American tourists **

    Don’t try smuggling fruit and vegetables into New Zealand. You will be caught by the vigilant and specially trained horticultural police and instantly deported!

    ‘Tourist rejected after ‘reckless’ fruit and vege smuggling’

    http://www.stuff.co.nz/travel/travel-troubles/91670757/tourist-rejected-after-reckless-fruit-and-vege-smuggling

    We need a huge wall to keep you reckless American smugglers out.

    Andrew

    • TheMirrorThetan

      Why would you smuggle fruit and Veg into New Zealand when you would get nicer fresher stuff there?
      I am afraid to click on the article link underneath that story:
      “* Man arrested after found smuggling gold bars in his rectum” LOL.

      EDIT Haha it gets even better “”A smuggler bringing gold pieces concealed in his rectum is often an expert. That’s because not anyone can move with ease when gold pieces are in the rear,” one customs officer said. “

      • Customs Officer 1: He was smuggling them by putting them up his… you know…
        CO2: Rectum?
        CO1: Well it didn’t do ’em any good, did it?

    • Jimmy3

      Fake news. You’ll have to do better than that to trick us, Australia Lite. I would buy the story that your average American idiot would try to smuggle food into your country. Sure. But only if you told me something along the lines of

      “her bag contained several packages of Double Stuf Oreos, Cheetos (both crunchy and poofy), a 24-pack of Pepsi, Cinnamon Toast Crunch in a ziplock, Poptarts, enough 5-hour Energy to kill an elephant, clearance bin jerky sticks, various bags of Doritos in flavors you probably didn’t even know were legal, Pringles, Pringles, Snickers, Reese, Reese, Reese, Reese, Goldfish crackers, and of course, a small bag of Harvest Cheddar Sun Chips, because the kids need a healthier option. Also, what looks like a box of Klondike bars melted at the bottom, but there were straws packed for that.”

      Now that would be a true story. The only way an American idiot would have apples and oranges and grapes or anything would be flavors in a bag of Skittles.

      • Jimmy3

        And I typed all that out because Tuesday is grocery day. So now I can go to bed, and just print it in the morning. Goodnight Bunker.

      • Kay (aka Nasty Lady)

        LOL !! Sooooo true.

    • Iconoclast Six

      You can have my kimchi when you pry it from my cold, dead hands!!!1!!!1!111!!1!11!!!1!1!!11!!!!

  • Snippy_X

    Maybe Hubbard was attempting to channel Seth, but was too dishonest to do it properly. Or he was ripping off Jane Roberts.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oNwnN2bmmkI

  • Gus Cox

    “in-sessionness”

    Jesus H. Christ.

  • balletlady

    Don’t you love how the Easter table is so nicely decorated and the first thing seen is the jug dispenser of KOOL AID…..have a glass compliments of the “church”….