TODAY AT SUBSTACK: If you’ve signed up for free emails at Substack, you will receive today’s feature story at your inbox: While we’ve been focused on a court case in Tampa, Scientology soldiers on elsewhere, still salvaging this planet from you doubters. Today we have one of the best OT 3 success stories ever, and we think you will agree that Scientology will soon clear this planet in no time! [What is this Substack thing, anyway?]
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Technology Cocktail
“If there is one thing that can add hours to the Cramming Officer’s day and cause misses in cramming, it is the glib type of cramming order. Examples of this are: ‘This staff member can’t do his post properly, so cram him,’ or ‘Joe isn’t making it in Treasury. He is creating all kinds of Dev-T. Please cram him.’ The way for the Cramming Officer to handle is to return the cramming order to the originator to be clarified and made specific. He would also cram the originator on the correct way to write a cramming order.” — L. Ron Hubbard, 1981
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“In the Western world there’s not even a Tradition of philosophy. There’s no Tradition of — what equivalent Western word is there for a guru? There isn’t, and yet an Indian wouldn’t know how to go through his day without knowing this word, guru, somehow or another. You get the idea, see? We did a survey in Washington, DC about 1955 which was a very intriguing survey. Because I wanted to know, I thought these birds would realize that the psychiatrists were — let’s put it in a more elegant sense than it deserves — that the psychiatrists were cutting into their racket. So we got ahold of all the ministers in Washington, DC on the idea that they might have some sensibility with regard to all this and asked them if they thought this was the case. No, No. Any time one of their congregation showed the least signs of becoming nervous, they instantly rushed him to the electric shock machine. Seventeen hundred and eight ministers out of seventeen hundred and ten were wildly in favor of the mental hospital and the electric shock machine as soon as possible. Why, the poor dopes! They didn’t realize that that religious ecstasy was the only thing which kept them whizzing. If anybody had suddenly stood up in their congregation and said, ‘I embrace the Lord,’ or something like that, they would have said, ‘Dr. Sparks, would you please send a wagon over right away, quick.’ See? In other words, the whole field of religion had been eaten up in this particular direction which I thought was rather amazing.” — L. Ron Hubbard, April 14, 1964
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“Several people are nominated to the Never-be-a-smuggler Club. Turning on bright lights, flashing flashlights toward the beach, opening up unnecessarily on the radio all disqualify one from being an Expert Smuggler. Such club members wind up in calabogos (jail) on suspicion. Pausing off the port as we did is not very good practise. Thanks to the guys who opened the cattledoor. They should however use lifelines when working so. And please can’t we oil all these reluctant hinges some calm day? Anyway our telex traffic was all good news. You can get off mail you see.” — The Commodore, April 14, 1969
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“Covid came into being about the time Ron was getting into the OT 9 material and the static anti-static case — i.e. existence non-existence sequence. We are witnessing a planetary response and manifestations of confusions blowing off; massive games conditions being as-ised and converted to no-games condition on a planet-wide scale; just from a small handful of us auditing on it. The solution is for us to continue to audit OT 9; which means a major shift and bettered conditions after this all settles.”
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1997: Dennis Erlich reported that Scientology is now required to produce, among other things, some of the documents concerning the transfer of advanced materials from L. Ron Hubbard to Scientology, witnessed by Notary Public David Miscavige. “On April 1 Magistrate Infante issued the following order granting my expedited motion to compel the scienos compliance (within 5 days) with his (Infante’s) prior order to produce a number of documents: poodleboy’s notary log book; income statements relating to sakrid droppings; every folder relating to me. In addition, the court finds that Plaintiffs’ failure to comply with this court’s previous order was without substantial justification. Therefore, on its own motion, the court orders RTC and BPI to reimburse counsel for Defendant Erlich for reasonable attorneys’ fees and costs incurred in bringing this motion. Based on the moving papers filed, the court determines that reasonable fees and costs are $850, which amount RTC and BPI collectively shall pay to counsel for Defendant Erlich within 7 days of the date of this order.”
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“Brand new account created just for this idiotic hit and run. These people couldn’t troll if their lives depended on it.”
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Full Court Press: What we’re watching at the Underground Bunker
Criminal prosecutions:
— Danny Masterson charged for raping three women: Sentenced to 30 years to life on Sep 7, 2023. Appeal now fully briefed, waiting for 2nd Appellate District court to set a hearing date. Masterson has also submitted a habeas corpus petition.
— ‘Lafayette Ronald Hubbard’ (a/k/a Justin Craig), aggravated assault, plus drug charges: Grand jury indictments include charges from an assault while in custody. Pleaded guilty on Nov 10 to a 17-year prison sentence (eligible for parole in two to three more years). Awaiting transfer to state prison.
— Aaron Matthes charged for SA of child under 12 years old: OT Scientologist facing multiple mandatory life sentences. Next pretrial court hearing set for March 9.
Civil litigation:
— Leah Remini v. Scientology, alleging ‘Fair Game’ harassment and defamation: Some defamation claims were removed by Judge Hammock. Judge Hammock’s ruling is on appeal, which is now fully briefed. Awaiting the setting of an oral arguments hearing.
— Baxter, Baxter, and Paris v. Scientology, alleging labor trafficking: Forced to ‘religious arbitration.’
— Valerie Haney v. Scientology: Forced to ‘religious arbitration.’ 15 days of arbitration completed, Val waiting for further word from the IJC.
— Chrissie Bixler et al. v. Scientology and Danny Masterson. Judge Upindra Kalra’s ruling denying Scientology’s motion to strike is on appeal. Appeal fully briefed. Motion to replace Jane Does’ AI-tainted brief denied by court. Oral arguments hearing on March 3.
— Jane Doe 1 v. Scientology, David Miscavige, and Gavin Potter: Case unsealed and second amended complaint filed. Scientology moves for religious arbitration. Trial has been set for January 10, 2028.
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Other links: The prosecution of Danny Masterson. Leah Remini’s Fair Game Podcast. Leah Remini’s A&E Series. Scientology’s Celebrities, from A to Z. Bryan Seymour’s suppressed series, Scientology Black Ops: Tom Cruise and dirty tricks. Scientology’s Ideal Orgs, from one end of the planet to the other. Scientology’s sneaky front groups, spreading the good news about L. Ron Hubbard while pretending to benefit society. Scientology Lit: Books reviewed or excerpted in a weekly series. How many have you read?
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THE WHOLE TRACK
[ONE year ago] More sneaky ways Scientology is buddying up with your local heroes
[TWO years ago] Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard’s nightmare year, 1951, told in news clippings
[THREE years ago] The Bad Cadet: New book looks at Scientology in a coming-of-age story
[FOUR years ago] Scientology propaganda masterpiece: Grant Cardone’s COO coughs up $1.1 million
[FIVE years ago] Scientology’s founder said Mars was inhabited, & now a Scientologist helps run Perseverance!
[SIX years ago] Scientology logic: Blame the media for fake virus news while promising superhuman powers
[SEVEN years ago] L. Ron Hubbard defines religion for you skeptical non-Xenu believers
[EIGHT years ago] Another Scientologist runs for office in Nevada — but her campaign says she’s not a member
[NINE years ago] Scientology invited local business owners to its Clearwater celeb party. Well, except one.
[TEN years ago] GARCIAS BACK IN COURT AFTER SCIENTOLOGY MAKES ARBITRATION IMPOSSIBLE, THEY SAY
[ELEVEN years ago] Announcing a new video series — The stories of young Scientologists not told in ‘Going Clear’
[TWELVE years ago] Scientology litigation always has surprises: A new wrinkle from Narconon’s attorneys
[THIRTEEN years ago] Scientology Sunday Funnies: Buffalo Gals Go ‘Round the Outside, and the Return of DEDE!
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Bernie Headley (1952-2019) did not see his daughter Stephanie in his final 5,667 days.
Joe Reaiche (1958-2024) did not see his daughter Alanna Masterson in his final 6,999 days.
Mike Rinder (1955-2025) did not see his son Benjamin and daughter Taryn in his final 7,589 days.
Tammy Synovec has not seen her daughter Julia in 3,598 days.
Valerie Haney has not seen her mother Lynne in 4,102 days.
Katrina Reyes has not seen her mother Yelena in 4,608 days
Sylvia Wagner DeWall has not seen her brother Randy in 4,158 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his grandson Leo in 3,148 days.
Klaus Büchele has not seen his daughter Jasmin in 5,534 days.
Geoff Levin has not seen his son Collin and daughter Savannah in 3,029 days.
Christie Collbran has not seen her mother Liz King in 6,333 days.
Marc Headley has not seen his mother Trudy in 4,984 days.
Clarissa Adams has not seen her parents Walter and Irmin Huber in 4,202 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 5,756 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 5,097 days.
Dylan Gill has not seen his father Russell in 13,668 days.
Melissa Paris has not seen her father Jean-Francois in 9,584 days.
Valeska Paris has not seen her brother Raphael in 5,751 days.
Mirriam Francis has not seen her brother Ben in 5,337 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 5,592 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica in 4,344 days.
Marie Poulin has not seen her mother June in 3,913 days.
Julian Wain has not seen his brother Joseph or mother Susan in 2,224 days.
Charley Updegrove has not seen his son Toby in 3,399 days.
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 5,081 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 5,418 days.
Roger Weller has not seen his daughter Alyssa in 10,271 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 5,387 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 3,749 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 4,160 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis in 4,548 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 4,432 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 3,996 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike and daughter Emily in 4,508 days.
Mary Jane Barry has not seen her daughter Samantha in 4,768 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 15,872 days.
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Posted by Tony Ortega on April 14, 2026 at 07:00
E-mail tips to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter.
Our book with Paulette Cooper, Battlefield Scientology: Exposing L. Ron Hubbard’s dangerous ‘religion’ is on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats. Our book about Paulette, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.
The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2024 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Underground Bunker (2012-2024), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)
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Tony Ortega at The Daily Beast
