TODAY AT SUBSTACK: If you’ve signed up for free emails at Substack, you will receive today’s feature story at your inbox: As usual, the grand opening of a new Scientology ‘Ideal Org’ — this time in Puerto Rico — resulted in church leader David Miscavige presiding over everything with his usual aplomb. But only a week later, a video showing off the place stunned us for a surprising reason. [What is this Substack thing, anyway?]
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Technology Cocktail
“I recently made an important technical discovery that a person, org or area can be totally bogged by a mis-cram or by an R/Ser operating under the guise of a ‘Cramming Officer.’ In the particular instance, one R/Sing Cramming Officer had bogged an org and then a second R/Sing Cramming Officer took over to ‘repair it,’ resulting in a nearly total crash. This isn’t meant to be condemnatory of Cramming Officers because I know the vast majority do a good job and are valuable to their orgs and I do appreciate their efforts. The above are the general circumstances which led to my discovery. To remedy this, I developed the following Cramming Repair List. In subsequent use of it, including people who had been mis-crammed elsewhere, the usage appeared quite miraculous.” — L. Ron Hubbard, 1981
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“I blew up a whole writing class one time. It’s a wonder they all didn’t leave school. Actually, they relegated it to sort of getting the professor to reprimand me. It was the short story class of Harvard — excuse me, ‘Hah-varrd.’ They made the mistake of having a series of lectures from successful writers. And each one of these gave them a short series of lectures. And all of these people were in a class called Creative Writing. And they were very nicely dressed children. And so my lectures were very well received, and so forth, right up to a point….Because what I told the class that caused them to completely blow up was, I said, ‘Well,’ I said, ‘when you’ve written a few hundred thousand words, why, then you’ve got a style. And it’s taken me about I think, about a hundred thousand words before I had any inkling of any kind of a style.’ And I suddenly noticed, I looked around, I had a class in front of me that was in a state of shock!…It had never occurred to those damned fools or that professor that writers write! And this had nothing whatsoever to do with their education. I know that’s an unbelievable experience. It left me in a state of shock. ‘Well, Hubbard’s an awful bad fellow.’ Never forgave me. I was probably used as a horrible example in that school for years.” — L. Ron Hubbard, March 9, 1965
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“AOUK is the highest GI since September 1969! The International GI is the highest since 5 May 1969! Yet several orgs GIs were missing on it due to telex delays! So the FB and production of FAO are showing up where it counts. This is the direct result of renewed Flag industriousness, the teams we are sending out and the on the ground hard work of willing staffs. All have a part in producing such wins, storesmen, engineers, the whole crew.” — The Commodore, March 9, 1971
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“I relate to Beingness as the primary assumption of a Cycle of Existence, Here and Now which may then be differentiated by relative location in space. For me time is relative location in space. Reality is Here, beyond the dissolution of the mechanical conditions of existence, Mind and the separateness of Identity. Reality as Agreement is exactly that: MEST Agreements and Allegiances. In truth reality is a condition of Isness beyond existence and it is composed of everyone. The reality of people. Life is a product of Imagination, identity I, You, He, She, It, We, You plural, They and Mind which generates the Void of Potentiality and results in Existence through the assumption of Beingness as Source.”
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1996: Grady Ward received a letter dated March 11th this week from Scientology attorney Helena Kobrin. “I am writing to put you formally on notice that the contents of the NOTs pack is copyrighted, confidential, unpublished materials, owned by my client, Religious Technology Center, which constitute trade secrets under the California Uniform Trade Secrets Act (UTSA), as ruled in Bridge Publications, Inc. v. Vien, 827 F.Supp. 629, 633 (S.D.Cal. 1993). That pack has only left the premises of an advanced Church of Scientology through theft. All copies of that pack have been ordered impounded by courts in the United States and Europe. Therefore, any copies which still exist in unauthorized hands are the fruit of that theft and have been made and distributed in violation of court orders. “You are mistaken in your apparent notion that not having signed a confidentiality agreement insulates you from liability for trade secret misappropriation. Under the UTSA and case law interpreting that Act, misappropriation includes acquiring a trade secret of another with knowledge of the confidential and misappropriated status of the trade secret, or from or through a person having a duty to the owner of the trade secret. It also includes innocent acquisition–which yours could not possibly be- -if notice is received afterwards. You have clearly been on notice both before and after any such acquisition of these materials.” Grady replied: “I presume my anonymous correspondents obtain their documents legally. Relying upon advice form a *proven* liar like yourself would be not prudent, eh?”
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“Hey, a free trip to America and free rice and beans probably sounds pretty good to a fairly large segment of the world’s population.”
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Full Court Press: What we’re watching at the Underground Bunker
Criminal prosecutions:
— Danny Masterson charged for raping three women: Sentenced to 30 years to life on Sep 7, 2023. Appeal now fully briefed, waiting for 2nd Appellate District court to set a hearing date. Masterson has also submitted a habeas corpus petition.
— ‘Lafayette Ronald Hubbard’ (a/k/a Justin Craig), aggravated assault, plus drug charges: Grand jury indictments include charges from an assault while in custody. Pleaded guilty on Nov 10 to a 17-year prison sentence (eligible for parole in two to three more years). Awaiting transfer to state prison.
— Aaron Matthes charged for SA of child under 12 years old: OT Scientologist facing multiple mandatory life sentences. Next pretrial court hearing set for March 9.
Civil litigation:
— Leah Remini v. Scientology, alleging ‘Fair Game’ harassment and defamation: Some defamation claims were removed by Judge Hammock. Judge Hammock’s ruling is on appeal, which is now fully briefed. Awaiting the setting of an oral arguments hearing.
— Baxter, Baxter, and Paris v. Scientology, alleging labor trafficking: Forced to ‘religious arbitration.’
— Valerie Haney v. Scientology: Forced to ‘religious arbitration.’ 15 days of arbitration completed, Val waiting for further word from the IJC.
— Chrissie Bixler et al. v. Scientology and Danny Masterson. Judge Upindra Kalra’s ruling denying Scientology’s motion to strike is on appeal. Appeal fully briefed. Motion to replace Jane Does’ AI-tainted brief denied by court. Oral arguments hearing on March 3.
— Jane Doe 1 v. Scientology, David Miscavige, and Gavin Potter: Case unsealed and second amended complaint filed. Scientology moves for religious arbitration. Trial has been set for January 10, 2028.
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Other links: The prosecution of Danny Masterson. Leah Remini’s Fair Game Podcast. Leah Remini’s A&E Series. Scientology’s Celebrities, from A to Z. Bryan Seymour’s suppressed series, Scientology Black Ops: Tom Cruise and dirty tricks. Scientology’s Ideal Orgs, from one end of the planet to the other. Scientology’s sneaky front groups, spreading the good news about L. Ron Hubbard while pretending to benefit society. Scientology Lit: Books reviewed or excerpted in a weekly series. How many have you read?
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THE WHOLE TRACK
[ONE year ago] Grant Cardone’s chief exec on why this is Scientology’s moment
[TWO years ago] PODCAST: Mark Bunker on Scientologists stealing his campaign signs
[THREE years ago] Scientology documentary resurfaces, and it leads to a foreign exchange program!
[FOUR years ago] Scientology and Ukraine: While some back Putin, Volunteer Ministers see an opportunity
[FIVE years ago] No shortage of fake news catering to Q patriots assures that they have plenty to hope for
[SIX years ago] Scientology attempts to clean up its balloon mess by clearing beach of syringes
[SEVEN years ago] William Burroughs at Scientology’s ‘Saint Hill Manor’ in 1968, before his discontent
[EIGHT years ago] Scientologists bombarded to attend Hubbard birthday events, and this is our favorite flier
[NINE years ago] As Louis Theroux’s ‘My Scientology Movie’ hits U.S., troubling news of co-star Marty Rathbun
[TEN years ago] Scientology ‘disconnection’ billboard to be a block from David Miscavige’s office & residence
[ELEVEN years ago] Scientology documentary ‘Going Clear’ participants getting harassed, threatened
[TWELVE years ago] Video Vault: When Scientology basked in the success of giant cucumbers
[THIRTEEN years ago] Scientology Mythbusting with Jon Atack: Xenu the Galactic Overlord, Part 1!
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Bernie Headley (1952-2019) did not see his daughter Stephanie in his final 5,667 days.
Joe Reaiche (1958-2024) did not see his daughter Alanna Masterson in his final 6,999 days.
Mike Rinder (1955-2025) did not see his son Benjamin and daughter Taryn in his final 7,589 days.
Tammy Synovec has not seen her daughter Julia in 3,562 days.
Valerie Haney has not seen her mother Lynne in 4,066 days.
Katrina Reyes has not seen her mother Yelena in 4,572 days
Sylvia Wagner DeWall has not seen her brother Randy in 4,122 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his grandson Leo in 3,112 days.
Klaus Büchele has not seen his daughter Jasmin in 5,498 days.
Geoff Levin has not seen his son Collin and daughter Savannah in 2,993 days.
Christie Collbran has not seen her mother Liz King in 6,297 days.
Marc Headley has not seen his mother Trudy in 4,948 days.
Clarissa Adams has not seen her parents Walter and Irmin Huber in 4,166 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 5,720 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 5,061 days.
Dylan Gill has not seen his father Russell in 13,632 days.
Melissa Paris has not seen her father Jean-Francois in 9,548 days.
Valeska Paris has not seen her brother Raphael in 5,715 days.
Mirriam Francis has not seen her brother Ben in 5,297 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 5,556 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica in 4,308 days.
Marie Poulin has not seen her mother June in 3,873 days.
Julian Wain has not seen his brother Joseph or mother Susan in 2,188 days.
Charley Updegrove has not seen his son Toby in 3,363 days.
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 5,045 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 5,382 days.
Roger Weller has not seen his daughter Alyssa in 10,235 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 5,351 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 3,713 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 4,124 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis in 4,512 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 4,396 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 3,960 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike and daughter Emily in 4,472 days.
Mary Jane Barry has not seen her daughter Samantha in 4,732 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 15,836 days.
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Posted by Tony Ortega on March 9, 2026 at 07:00
E-mail tips to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter.
Our book with Paulette Cooper, Battlefield Scientology: Exposing L. Ron Hubbard’s dangerous ‘religion’ is on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats. Our book about Paulette, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.
The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2024 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Underground Bunker (2012-2024), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)
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Tony Ortega at The Daily Beast
