Daily Notifications
Sign up for free emails to receive the feature story every morning in your inbox at


Another Scientology OT jumps from a tall building

We hadn’t heard of him, but apparently Frank Suárez and his weight loss empire, known as “NaturalSlim” and “MetabolismoTV,” was very popular in Latin America, and had made inroads in the US as well. A quick tour of his websites shows us that he was not only selling magic pills to help speed up your metabolism and help you lose weight, but also such quackery as “detox pills,” anti-stress drinks, and “candida cleanse.”

So it might not surprise you to learn that Suárez, 71, was an OT 8 Scientologist and Patron Meritorious donor ($250,000) and was president of Scientology’s ‘The Way to Happiness’ Foundation in Puerto Rico.

In other words, Suárez was a major promoter of the idea that Scientology had given him the keys to a happy life and could do the same for anyone.

Also, he threw himself from the balcony of his ninth-floor San Juan apartment Thursday morning.


Despite Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard’s assertion that gravity, like all laws of nature, is merely a matter of agreement, it proved all too real for Mr. Suárez, who was killed instantly.

We couldn’t help thinking about another Scientologist, Evgeny Zharkin, who fell out of the 8th floor of a Clearwater building in 2014 after he’d spent 30 hours traveling from Moscow to Scientology’s Flag Land Base. We published the police investigation of Zharkin’s death, which concluded that there was no foul play and suggested that, groggy from his flight, he’d simply fallen out of a window he thought led to a balcony. But the county medical examiner concluded it was a suicide.

Well, as shocking as it is that a Scientology OT like Frank Suárez might give up his life after attaining the superpowers that come with topping out on the Bridge to Total Freedom, keep in mind that Hubbardism also teaches that Frank will soon be jumping into a newborn baby to start a new lifetime. So he’s got that going for him.



Trevor Heasley with Ross Blocher takes on the definition of “cult”

One of the treats of the “Oh No, Ross and Carrie!” podcast and its investigation of Scientology five years ago was an episode with recent defector Trevor Heasley. Trevor has helped us out as well with some things, and he’s recently been putting together some very good videos. He let us know that he was starting up a new video series and had Ross Blocher on as his first guest. They take on that troublesome word we tend to avoid, “cult,” and do a very entertaining job trying to define it.



Source Code


“Look at the laudable withholds of a lady. She withholds herself from drinking. She withholds herself from swearing. She withholds herself from rowdy companions. She withholds herself from dirt, you know, and getting dirty. Withholds herself from getting sweaty. See, all the things a lady withholds herself from. Withholds herself from sex, from pleasure, from pleasurable excitement. This starts to look like a very interesting series of withholds. And we finally find out that a lady’s primary mission was to hold herself from living. Not that that’s — things I have mentioned are the total composite of living.” — L. Ron Hubbard, February 27, 1962


Avast, Ye Mateys

“The trick in books is the ‘stock book.’ Whenever a title in stock gets low through sales you reorder before you are out. You don’t just sell it all the way out of stock before reordering. Once youve let a title vanish off the shelves you’re in trouble as it takes a while to reprint. Meanwhile backorders and complaints swamp the comm lines and there goes the old ball game. A pubs activity can’t remain solvent on paperbacks or bulk discount sales! Theres a special skill to the mail order book business. The keynotes are promote, have them on hand, deliver within 24 hours and order receipt. It will take a lot of work by the SO to get this back in.” — The Commodore, February 27. 1971


Overheard in the FreeZone

“The curb you sometimes trip over on your way to work each day — you think that curb rings true simply because you skinned your knee on it? No, it is formed from lies. One day we will want to dispense with that curb. It has served its purpose. Now we want to move on to another universe or simply create a different kind of curb. On that day you want to dispense with that curb, you will need to track it back to its source. When you find the source you will have the complete truth about the curb and it will as-is. It’s the same with every piece of mest in this universe – including Scientology. The reason it is such a problem is that the individual pieces are not easily tracked back to source. So we are stuck with the mass and the garbage tips are getting bigger and bigger. The real truth is, at the end of the day the only thing we can take with us is our knowingness because it isn’t made out of mest.”


Past is Prologue

2000: Medical Examiner Joan Wood has changed her opinion of the manner of Lisa McPherson’s death. It has been changed from “undetermined” to “accidental.” From the St. Petersburg Times: “Scientology’s top executives, clearly pleased Tuesday, called the switch ‘extremely significant and a huge development that dramatically affects the state’s case.’ They said it supports their view that McPherson’s death while in the care of Scientology staffers in Clearwater was sudden, unpredictable, ‘undiagnosable’ and not the church’s fault. Wood’s decision came after church officials and their lawyers spent months plying the veteran medical examiner with expert information that revealed the lengths to which Scientology has gone to defend itself. There were scientific studies on a body substance known as ketone, an elaborate accident reconstruction, even a report by an ‘anthropometric’ specialist who studied McPherson’s physical stature. Gone from the new report is the original reference to the bed rest and dehydration. Wood still traces the death to a blood clot behind McPherson’s knee. But she lists McPherson’s psychosis and a minor auto accident as major factors.”



Random Howdy

“The ‘church’ had to admit to TR-L in the Canadian trial when they questioned the veracity of the prosecution’s ex-Scientologist witnesses by stating to the judge their testimony couldn’t be trusted because they had been specifically trained to lie while in the church.”


Full Court Press: What we’re watching at the Underground Bunker

Criminal prosecutions:
Danny Masterson charged for raping three women: Masterson arraigned Jan 20. Next conf to set prelim, March 24.
Jay and Jeff Spina, Medicare fraud: Jay’s sentencing delayed to April 13.
Hanan and Rizza Islam and other family members, Medi-Cal fraud: Trial scheduled for May 20 in Los Angeles
David Gentile, GPB Capital, fraud: Charged in Brooklyn federal court on Feb 4. Arraigned on Feb 9. Pretrial conference set for Apr 29.

Civil litigation:
Luis and Rocio Garcia v. Scientology: Oral arguments were heard on July 30 at the Eleventh Circuit
Valerie Haney v. Scientology: Forced to ‘religious arbitration.’ Petition for writ of mandate denied Oct 22 by Cal 2nd Appellate District. Petition for review by state supreme court denied Dec 11.
Chrissie Bixler et al. v. Scientology and Danny Masterson: Dec 30, Judge Kleifield granted Scientology’s motions to compel arbitration. March 8: Status conference.
Matt and Kathy Feschbach tax debt: Eleventh Circuit ruled on Sept 9 that Feshbachs can’t discharge IRS debt in bankruptcy. Dec 17: Feshbachs sign court judgment obliging them to pay entire $3.674 million tax debt, plus interest from Nov 19.
Brian Statler Sr v. City of Inglewood: Second amended complaint filed, trial set for Nov 9, 2021.
Author Steve Cannane defamation trial: Trial concluded, Cannane victorious, awarded court costs. Case appealed on Dec 24.

Concluded litigation:
Dennis Nobbe, Medicare fraud, PPP loan fraud: Charged July 29. Bond revoked Sep 14. Nobbe dead, Sep 14.
Jane Doe v. Scientology (in Miami): Jane Doe dismissed the lawsuit on May 15 after the Clearwater Police dropped their criminal investigation of her allegations.


SCIENTOLOGY BLACK OPS: Tom Cruise and dirty tricks

The Australian Seven News network cancelled a 10-part investigation of Scientology and its history of dirty tricks. Read the transcripts of the episodes and judge for yourself why Tom Cruise and Tommy Davis might not have wanted viewers to see this hard-hitting series by journalist Bryan Seymour.


After the success of their double-Emmy-winning, three-season A&E series ‘Scientology and the Aftermath,’ Leah Remini and Mike Rinder continue the conversation on their podcast, ‘Scientology: Fair Game.’ We’ve created a landing page where you can hear all of the episodes so far.


An episode-by-episode guide to Leah Remini’s three-season, double-Emmy winning series that changed everything for Scientology watching. Originally aired from 2016 to 2019 on the A&E network, and now on Netflix.


Find your favorite Hubbardite celeb at this index page — or suggest someone to add to the list!

Other links: Scientology’s Ideal Orgs, from one end of the planet to the other. Scientology’s sneaky front groups, spreading the good news about L. Ron Hubbard while pretending to benefit society. Scientology Lit: Books reviewed or excerpted in a weekly series. How many have you read?



[ONE year ago] Balloons? Here’s what Scientology should really be apologizing for
[TWO years ago] A letter of surrender, written from the basement of Scientology’s ‘Big Blue’ HQ
[THREE years ago] New memoir ‘Flunk. Start.’ richly illuminates the appeal — and betrayal — of Scientology
[FOUR years ago] Keep your Oscars, we won a Scientology ‘bigot’ award!
[FIVE years ago] Augustine: How Scientology makes it so hard to get your money back
[SIX years ago] Gerry Armstrong’s full 1997 ‘Secret Lives’ interview about L. Ron Hubbard
[SEVEN years ago] Is Ukraine’s proposed new prime minister a Scientologist? Says his niece: ‘That’s crap’
[EIGHT years ago] Lori Hodgson Appeals to Scientology’s “Spin Doctor,” Michael Sitrick
[NINE years ago] Scientology’s Secret Behind “Ideal Orgs” Revealed At Last


Scientology disconnection, a reminder

Bernie Headley (1952-2019) did not see his daughter Stephanie in his final 5,667 days.
Valerie Haney has not seen her mother Lynne in 2,225 days.
Katrina Reyes has not seen her mother Yelena in 2,729 days
Sylvia Wagner DeWall has not seen her brother Randy in 2,249 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his grandson Leo in 1,269 days.
Geoff Levin has not seen his son Collin and daughter Savannah in 1,160 days.
Christie Collbran has not seen her mother Liz King in 4,467 days.
Clarissa Adams has not seen her parents Walter and Irmin Huber in 2,335 days.
Carol Nyburg has not seen her daughter Nancy in 3,109 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 3,913 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 3,229 days.
Dylan Gill has not seen his father Russell in 11,795 days.
Melissa Paris has not seen her father Jean-Francois in 7,714 days.
Valeska Paris has not seen her brother Raphael in 3,882 days.
Mirriam Francis has not seen her brother Ben in 3,463 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 3,724 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 2,762 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica in 2,475 days.
Marie Bilheimer has not seen her mother June in 2,000 days.
Julian Wain has not seen his brother Joseph or mother Susan in 355 days.
Charley Updegrove has not seen his son Toby in 1,530 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 6,081 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 3,230 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 3,550 days.
Roger Weller has not seen his daughter Alyssa in 8,405 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 3,524 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 1,880 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin and daughter Taryn in 6,183 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 2,289 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis in 2,691 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 2,563 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 2,146 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike and daughter Emily in 2,641 days.
Mary Jane Barry has not seen her daughter Samantha in 2,895 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 14,004 days.


Posted by Tony Ortega on February 27, 2021 at 07:00

E-mail tips to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We also post updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our new book with Paulette Cooper, Battlefield Scientology: Exposing L. Ron Hubbard’s dangerous ‘religion’ is now on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats. Our book about Paulette, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2020 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Underground Bunker (2012-2020), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Other links: BLOGGING DIANETICS: Reading Scientology’s founding text cover to cover | UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists | GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice | SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts | Shelly Miscavige, 15 years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Watch our short videos that explain Scientology’s controversies in three minutes or less…

Check your whale level at our dedicated page for status updates, or join us at the Underground Bunker’s Facebook discussion group for more frivolity.

Our non-Scientology stories: Robert Burnham Jr., the man who inscribed the universe | Notorious alt-right inspiration Kevin MacDonald and his theories about Jewish DNA | The selling of the “Phoenix Lights” | Astronomer Harlow Shapley‘s FBI file | Sex, spies, and local TV news | Battling Babe-Hounds: Ross Jeffries v. R. Don Steele


Share Button
Print Friendly, PDF & Email