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CLEARWATER APOCALYPSE! No, not really. But let’s help Scientology run its new board

 
Last night Tampa Bay Times stalwart Tracey McManus reported that for the first time, Scientologists had won a majority on a government body in the city of Clearwater.

Egads! How could the good people of Clearwater, after everything Leah Remini exposed in her excellent two episodes in that town, bring themselves to vote in Scientologists to run things?

Well, the answer is they didn’t. As McManus was careful to explain, this wasn’t a citywide vote. It wasn’t even a city council district. It was the downtown business district, and the only people eligible to vote were businesses in a small area.

Of the three Scientologists who won seats and will be joining a fourth member to have a 4-3 majority, none of them even got 150 votes in this thing.

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And McManus also explained that the body they’re taking over, the Downtown Development Board, can’t write laws or hire or fire staff.

So what can this board do, and what kind of damage could it do with Scientologists in charge?

“It uses $267,000 in revenues from a special tax assessed on property owners within district boundaries to fund events, market downtown and attract new businesses,” McManus says.

Scientologists? Attract businesses to Clearwater’s downtown? That’s a good one!

But seriously, we know that they will have lots of hard work ahead of them, and that’s where you come in.

We know that our commenting community is extremely creative, so we put it to you: What are the most fun ways that Scientologists could spend the city’s $267,000 to convince people to come to downtown Clearwater?

We’ll start. How about choosing a date to make an official city holiday: Project Normandy Day. Can’t you just see a parade down Fort Harrison Avenue with naval floats, an honorary commodore, and baton twirlers wearing hot pants and halter tops? It’s a natural!

 
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The tent is ready. Will Captain Miscavige show up Friday?

Here’s a look at the tent in East Grinstead ahead of Friday night’s annual IAS gathering.

 

 
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ABC7 coverage of the Hanan Islam hearing

In case you missed it yesterday at The Lowdown…

 

 
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Source Code

“Anderson, Q.C., Melbourne inquiry. Complete gibbering psychotic idiot. Up to the gills with R-6. ‘Scientology must be wrong, because we cannot explain where all the new bodies come from. All the new spirits. Where would all the new spirits come from if everybody had a spirit, why, where would all the new spirits come from, huh?’ Actually, what he didn’t realize, this silly ass — he was disproving Catholicism. Catholicism claims there’s one spirit per body, so he was asking some silly little kid question that is asked of his own religion, Catholicism. And yet he was busy hanging Scientology because it couldn’t… You get the irrationality of it? The man occupies a perfectly valid position. He’s looked on. He’s a Queens’ consulate. Actually he’s just a gibbering idiot. You probably couldn’t even catch him to get a straight jacket on him.” — L. Ron Hubbard, October 9, 1968

 
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Overheard in the FreeZone

“I live in Perth Australia which including myself has a grand total of 3 independents that are actually doing anything and no organisation to speak of. One day I’ll be the Captain of this city but not today.”

 
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Random Howdy

“This place is nuts, but not half as nuts as YouTube. It’s just a little bit more serious and astute and friendly.”

 
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Scientology’s celebrities, ‘Ideal Orgs,’ and more!

[Elisabeth Moss, Michael Peña, and Laura Prepon]

We’ve been building landing pages about David Miscavige’s favorite playthings, including celebrities and ‘Ideal Orgs,’ and we’re hoping you’ll join in and help us gather as much information as we can about them. Head on over and help us with links and photos and comments.

Scientology’s celebrities, from A to Z! Find your favorite Hubbardite celeb at this index page — or suggest someone to add to the list!

Scientology’s ‘Ideal Orgs,’ from one end of the planet to the other! Help us build up pages about each these worldwide locations!

Scientology’s sneaky front groups, spreading the good news about L. Ron Hubbard while pretending to benefit society!

Scientology Lit: Books reviewed or excerpted in our weekly series. How many have you read?

 
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THE WHOLE TRACK

[ONE year ago] What it was like last night at Scientology’s Los Angeles TV ‘season’ premiere party
[TWO years ago] BLOCKBUSTER EXCLUSIVE: It turns out the National Enquirer is blowing smoke again
[THREE years ago] EXCLUSIVE: Recent deaths of Scientology rehab staffers points to ongoing problem
[FOUR years ago] The Scientology-Ireland connection that propelled Cathriona White to Hollywood
[FIVE years ago] Ryan Hamilton files two more federal lawsuits against Scientology’s drug rehab network
[SIX years ago] Anonymous and Craigslist: Proof that Scientology Knows It’s Under Attack

 
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Scientology disconnection, a reminder

Bernie Headley has not seen his daughter Stephanie in 5,592 days.
Valerie Haney has not seen her mother Lynne in 1,721 days.
Katrina Reyes has not seen her mother Yelena in 2,225 days
Sylvia Wagner DeWall has not seen her brother Randy in 1,745 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his grandson Leo in 765 days.
Geoff Levin has not seen his son Collin and daughter Savannah in 656 days.
Christie Collbran has not seen her mother Liz King in 3,963 days.
Clarissa Adams has not seen her parents Walter and Irmin Huber in 1,831 days.
Carol Nyburg has not seen her daughter Nancy in 2,605 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 3,379 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 2,725 days.
Dylan Gill has not seen his father Russell in 11,291 days.
Melissa Paris has not seen her father Jean-Francois in 7,210 days.
Valeska Paris has not seen her brother Raphael in 3,378 days.
Mirriam Francis has not seen her brother Ben in 2,959 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 3,220 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 2,259 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica in 1,971 days.
Marie Bilheimer has not seen her mother June in 1,497 days.
Charley Updegrove has not seen his son Toby in 1,023 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 5,586 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 2,726 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 3,046 days.
Roger Weller has not seen his daughter Alyssa in 7,902 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 3,021 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 1,376 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin and daughter Taryn in 5,679 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 1,785 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis in 2,187 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 2,059 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 1,642 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike and daughter Emily in 2,137 days.
Mary Jane Barry has not seen her daughter Samantha in 2,391 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 13,500 days.

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Posted by Tony Ortega on October 9, 2019 at 07:00

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Our new book with Paulette Cooper, Battlefield Scientology: Exposing L. Ron Hubbard’s dangerous ‘religion’ is now on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats. Our book about Paulette, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2018 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Underground Bunker (2012-2018), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Other links: BLOGGING DIANETICS: Reading Scientology’s founding text cover to cover | UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists | GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice | SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts | Shelly Miscavige, 14 years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Watch our short videos that explain Scientology’s controversies in three minutes or less…

Check your whale level at our dedicated page for status updates, or join us at the Underground Bunker’s Facebook discussion group for more frivolity.

Our non-Scientology stories: Robert Burnham Jr., the man who inscribed the universe | Notorious alt-right inspiration Kevin MacDonald and his theories about Jewish DNA | The selling of the “Phoenix Lights” | Astronomer Harlow Shapley‘s FBI file | Sex, spies, and local TV news | Battling Babe-Hounds: Ross Jeffries v. R. Don Steele

 

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