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AUDIO LEAK: You’re invited to a Scientology TV watch party at the Portland org!

[Mark Bunker at the Portland event, 2013]

We’ve kept a pretty close watch over many of Scientology’s ‘Ideal Org’ opening ceremonies, but there’s one that will always have a special place in our hearts. That’s when Mark Bunker had such a wild day trying to film the Portland Ideal Org grand opening in May 2013, and became the focus of furious action by various Scientology goons, aided by the local police force, to try and keep him away.

We’re thinking about that now, more than six years later, for a couple of reasons. First, because this weekend in Kansas City there was a new Ideal Org grand opening for the first time in more than a year, and reports from people on the scene keep coming in about the lengths that Scientology went to in order to keep the curious away.

It’s bad enough that David Miscavige finds local shills to participate in the ceremony, but Scientology also spends a lot of time in the weeks leading up to the event filling the local police force with a lot of nonsense about the ceremony coming under attack from terrorists, or something.

We had long suspected that was the case, but then it was spelled out in documents that an enterprising reporter in San Diego obtained for us, showing that Scientology submitted dossiers on the church’s critics to the local police force, no doubt to get them amped up and thinking that some pretty dangerous characters might be showing up.

And so, this is the result: One of our readers reports that they managed to get a great rooftop vantage point to watch the Kansas City ceremony this weekend with the help of a friend who worked at the location where they were perched. But within minutes, the local police force appeared…


Within 10 minutes, the KCMO police department showed up, flashed their badges, and told us to come down and talk to them. We politely declined, as we were breaking no laws. Over the next 45 minutes, they shot video of us and worked on gaining entry into the building. Upon gaining entry, they detained us and tried to force us to identify ourselves, claiming that there had been “death threats” to the event and we might be “snipers.” We were finally released when they verified that my friend worked there and we had every right to be there.

In 2013, Mark Bunker went through something similar, as police helped the Scientologists kick Bunker out of one vantage point after another. We learned from a reader that Scientology had somehow managed to obtain a four-block permit that is usually reserved for film shoots.

Bunker was finally able to get a vantage point a couple of blocks away, but even there he was harassed by Scientology thug John Allender, one of the “Squirrel Busters” who had been sent from California to intimidate Lori Hodgson in Texas in 2011. Scientology goons, they’re a rare breed.

Anyway, the other reason that the Portland org is in our thoughts is this nifty robocall that was recorded by one of our readers. Doesn’t this invite sound great?


Hello, this is Ben calling from the Church of Scientology to invite you to an upcoming activity we will be hosting on Monday, November 11th starting at 6 o’clock. We will be having a premiere viewing party of the new episode on the Church of Scientology of Portland, and it goes until 6:30, at which point you’ll be treated to a complimentary dinner. And then at 7 o’clock a free seminar by master sales trainer Mr. Alan Hollander entitled ‘The art of salesmanship and how to apply the technology to sales to improve your life, your business, and your career.’ And that goes from 7 o’clock to 8:30. So you’re invited to attend and if you’d like to please press one to RSVP. Thank you, bye-bye.

Since that big day in 2013, we’ve received regular reports that the Portland org, despite its location downtown, is as dead as can be. But now it’s going to be the subject of a Scientology TV episode! Imagine how alive it’s going to look as part of that slick TV channel!

Anyway, if you happen to take up this invite and go to the event, we want to hear all about it.


Ten years of Mike Rinder lobbing truth-bombs at the Church of Scientology

Mike Rinder has a great rundown today of some of his favorite posts from the ten years — ten years! — that his blog “Something Can Be Done About It” has been around.

We especially appreciate the hard work that Mike puts in, year after year, documenting the nuts and bolts of Scientology’s inexorable decline. He regularly gets smuggled wonderful internal documents which demonstrate the struggles that Scientology is having keeping up appearances as more and more members are giving up because of David Miscavige’s focus on extreme fundraising.


To our Aussie friend, here’s a Bunker salute.


Bonus items from our tipsters

Meanwhile, in Canada, it’s the Legend Gala!



Source Code

“Just this morning I am in correspondence with the Atomic Energy Commission on some material and have been for the last year and a half. We have some answers in mathematics in which they’re very interested, and so forth…If a man is burned today, he’s going to suffer because of it. There isn’t much going to interrupt the course of that fission burn except Scientology…Atomic radiation isn’t actually too hard to handle on an alleviation basis — on an assist basis — if your boy is not in too bad condition, if preclear is not too bad condition.” — L. Ron Hubbard, November 5, 1956


Overheard in the FreeZone

“We are incredibly lucky to be here on this planet at this time, so as to take advantage of this original opportunity to be freed. It hasn’t existed anywhere else ever. From time to time, you can see our ideas reflected in modern culture as time goes forward. And the basic ideas may infiltrate our culture for a long time. But ultimately, Scientology, to be fully effective, requires trained auditors and administrators. There’s just no way around it. That’s where we come in. We are, in effect, the ‘shepherds’ of a new civilization.”


Random Howdy

“Goodnight everyone and get your rest because tomorrow we travel further up the McSavage River into the Heart Of Darkness.”


Scientology’s celebrities, ‘Ideal Orgs,’ and more!

[The Big Three: Tom Cruise, John Travolta, and Kirstie Alley]

We’ve been building landing pages about David Miscavige’s favorite playthings, including celebrities and ‘Ideal Orgs,’ and we’re hoping you’ll join in and help us gather as much information as we can about them. Head on over and help us with links and photos and comments.

Scientology’s celebrities, from A to Z! Find your favorite Hubbardite celeb at this index page — or suggest someone to add to the list!

Scientology’s ‘Ideal Orgs,’ from one end of the planet to the other! Help us build up pages about each these worldwide locations!

Scientology’s sneaky front groups, spreading the good news about L. Ron Hubbard while pretending to benefit society!

Scientology Lit: Books reviewed or excerpted in our weekly series. How many have you read?



[ONE year ago] Jada Pinkett Smith reconciles with Leah Remini and puts herself in Scientology’s crosshairs
[TWO years ago] Shakeup at Narconon Arrowhead: Former worker dishes fresh intel on Scientology’s rehab flagship
[THREE years ago] An enduring myth in Scientology — that L. Ron Hubbard actually read your letters
[FOUR years ago] Can the tabloids ignore this photo of Tom Cruise getting his Scientology on?
[FIVE years ago] Ken Dandar files another court appeal to get out of Scientology’s million-dollar noose
[SIX years ago] Luis Garcia Responds: We Don’t Trust Scientology’s Trustee Ploy
[SEVEN years ago] Dianetics Read Aloud: Let Ron’s Wisdom Wash Over You
[EIGHT years ago] Scientology Dyspepsia: Commenters of the Week!


Scientology disconnection, a reminder

Bernie Headley has not seen his daughter Stephanie in 5,619 days.
Valerie Haney has not seen her mother Lynne in 1,748 days.
Katrina Reyes has not seen her mother Yelena in 2,252 days
Sylvia Wagner DeWall has not seen her brother Randy in 1,772 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his grandson Leo in 792 days.
Geoff Levin has not seen his son Collin and daughter Savannah in 683 days.
Christie Collbran has not seen her mother Liz King in 3,990 days.
Clarissa Adams has not seen her parents Walter and Irmin Huber in 1,858 days.
Carol Nyburg has not seen her daughter Nancy in 2,632 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 3,406 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 2,752 days.
Dylan Gill has not seen his father Russell in 11,318 days.
Melissa Paris has not seen her father Jean-Francois in 7,237 days.
Valeska Paris has not seen her brother Raphael in 3,405 days.
Mirriam Francis has not seen her brother Ben in 2,986 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 3,247 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 2,286 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica in 1,998 days.
Marie Bilheimer has not seen her mother June in 1,524 days.
Charley Updegrove has not seen his son Toby in 1,050 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 5,613 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 2,753 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 3,073 days.
Roger Weller has not seen his daughter Alyssa in 7,929 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 3,048 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 1,403 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin and daughter Taryn in 5,706 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 1,812 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis in 2,214 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 2,086 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 1,669 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike and daughter Emily in 2,164 days.
Mary Jane Barry has not seen her daughter Samantha in 2,418 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 13,527 days.


Posted by Tony Ortega on November 5, 2019 at 07:00

E-mail tips to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We also post updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our new book with Paulette Cooper, Battlefield Scientology: Exposing L. Ron Hubbard’s dangerous ‘religion’ is now on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats. Our book about Paulette, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2018 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Underground Bunker (2012-2018), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Other links: BLOGGING DIANETICS: Reading Scientology’s founding text cover to cover | UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists | GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice | SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts | Shelly Miscavige, 14 years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Watch our short videos that explain Scientology’s controversies in three minutes or less…

Check your whale level at our dedicated page for status updates, or join us at the Underground Bunker’s Facebook discussion group for more frivolity.

Our non-Scientology stories: Robert Burnham Jr., the man who inscribed the universe | Notorious alt-right inspiration Kevin MacDonald and his theories about Jewish DNA | The selling of the “Phoenix Lights” | Astronomer Harlow Shapley‘s FBI file | Sex, spies, and local TV news | Battling Babe-Hounds: Ross Jeffries v. R. Don Steele


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