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The Church of Scientology wants feedback about starting a podcast. Oh, pretty please?

Its television network has been such a smash success, the Church of Scientology is now thinking of really moving up in the world and getting one of those podcast things.

We know this because on its super-secret internal social media feed, members were asked to post a generic-looking survey about podcasts on non-Scientology Facebook groups in order to get some feedback from the general public.

How deliciously sneaky!

Here’s how the survey would look, with nothing to give away who was really asking the question:



And here are the instructions from the Hollywood Celebrity Centre: Get the wogs to give us data!


OK, people, the church wants some data on podcasts. What do you say?

What do you like to hear about in a [Scientology] podcast?

What should a [Scientology] podcast inspire you to do?

What should you feel after listening to a [Scientology] podcast?

Fill up that comment section with ideas!

And here’s another one: Who would you like to see host?

Mirit Hendrickson? Charlie Wakley? Joy Villa? Tom Cummins? Jim Mathers? Grant Cardone? Ed Parkin? Vick Tipnes? JoJo Zawawi?


You know, we’ll probably get stuck with Tad Reeves.


Your proprietor on the air

Speaking of podcasts, we’ve participated in yet another one, and this was really pretty fun.



Source Code

“You’re going up against a problem here, if you deal with the medico, of a person who monkeys. He doesn’t have any very precise answers. When he immediately gets out of the field of the broken leg, when he gets out of the field of putting on a tourniquet or some other type of action and he gets into a field where he himself does not have very good answers and so he monkeys. And they will do some very interesting and wild things. They will get some kind of a suspicion that there might be a growth in somebody’s chest and start removing tissue. And they’ll do exploratories and they will do all kinds of wild things. They will go into a tumor and take a small slice of it and so forth, thus activating it and aggravating it so that now the person practically is dying whereas before they weren’t bad off. In other words there’s a lot of monkey business. And I say that very advisedly. I could think of much more high school words than monkey business, but I think it rather fits, so forth. Man descended from monkeys and those that didn’t descend much became doctors. Bitter, huh?” — L. Ron Hubbard, July 30, 1964



Overheard in the FreeZone

“We’re not here to have a fun time as if that’s all that mattered. Many of us have a long track record of disappointment and worse on this road, and so our friends are utterly priceless beyond measure; we want to do our best for them because we don’t want to lose them again. It’s hard to imagine any other group anywhere with a higher ARC than the Scientologists. For those folk who fear ethics and justice there are LRH’s beautiful repairs and remedies. And perhaps they might be gently reminded that without ethics they would have no bread on their table, or even a table. Presently, the Church bears the name Scientology, but only by fraudulent means, and its members are charlatans. They have the same tools as us (or did once) but don’t apply them, instead, they’re into off-beat practices like MEST-worship. Maybe they’ll evolve into a flea, or something. We on the other hand, have nothing to fear, but everything to look forward to.”


Random Howdy

“The trigger for the OT 8 cognition is the line ‘the Pilot says: I’m mocking this up.’ The desired End Phenomena is ‘Now that I know what I am not, I am ready to find out what I am’.”


Full Court Press: What we’re watching at the Underground Bunker

Criminal prosecutions:
Danny Masterson charged for raping three women: Arraignment scheduled for September 18.
Jay and Jeff Spina, Medicare fraud: Jay’s sentencing is set for August 27 in White Plains, NY
Hanan and Rizza Islam and other family members, Medi-Cal fraud: Next pretrial conference set for Jan 12 in Los Angeles
Dennis Nobbe, Medicare fraud, PPP loan fraud: Charged July 29

Civil litigation:
Luis and Rocio Garcia v. Scientology: Oral arguments set for August 30 at the Eleventh Circuit
Valerie Haney v. Scientology: Forced to ‘religious arbitration.’ Hearing on motion for reconsideration set for August 11
Chrissie Bixler et al. v. Scientology and Danny Masterson: Sept 4 (CSI/RTC demurrer against Riales, Masterson demurrer), Oct 7-19 (motions to compel arbitration)
Jane Doe v. Scientology (in Miami): Jane Doe dismissed the lawsuit on May 15 after the Clearwater Police dropped their criminal investigation of her allegations.
Matt and Kathy Feschbach bankruptcy appeal: Oral arguments were heard on March 11 in Jacksonville
Brian Statler Sr v. City of Inglewood: Amended complaint filed, trial set for Nov 9, 2021


Scientology’s celebrities, ‘Ideal Orgs,’ and more!

[Jenna Elfman, Giovanni Ribisi, and Greta Van Susteren]

We’ve been building landing pages about David Miscavige’s favorite playthings, including celebrities and ‘Ideal Orgs,’ and we’re hoping you’ll join in and help us gather as much information as we can about them. Head on over and help us with links and photos and comments.

Scientology’s celebrities, from A to Z! Find your favorite Hubbardite celeb at this index page — or suggest someone to add to the list!

Scientology’s ‘Ideal Orgs,’ from one end of the planet to the other! Help us build up pages about each these worldwide locations!

Scientology’s sneaky front groups, spreading the good news about L. Ron Hubbard while pretending to benefit society!

Scientology Lit: Books reviewed or excerpted in our weekly series. How many have you read?



[ONE year ago] Miscavige changes course: All remaining Scientology orgs to go ‘Ideal’ at the same time
[TWO years ago] Here it is, your passport to Scientology godhood: Next stop, infinity!
[THREE years ago] Scientology ‘dead agents’ our own Rod Keller as it pursues more illegal activity in Mexico City
[FOUR years ago] L. Ron Hubbard as sad, oversexed schlub: The very personal writings his admirers never discuss
[FIVE years ago] The Church of Scientology’s forgotten president: Karen de la Carriere on Heber Jentzsch
[SIX years ago] Arlene Cordova needs your help: Where is Scientology keeping her daughter Barbara?
[SEVEN years ago] Scientology’s Needle Exchange: When David Miscavige Got Technical
[EIGHT years ago] Mimi Faust on Scientology: “They Wanted Me To Sign a Contract To Work For Them And I Refused”


Scientology disconnection, a reminder

Bernie Headley (1952-2019) did not see his daughter Stephanie in his final 5,667 days.
Valerie Haney has not seen her mother Lynne in 2,014 days.
Katrina Reyes has not seen her mother Yelena in 2,518 days
Sylvia Wagner DeWall has not seen her brother Randy in 2,038 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his grandson Leo in 1,058 days.
Geoff Levin has not seen his son Collin and daughter Savannah in 949 days.
Christie Collbran has not seen her mother Liz King in 4,256 days.
Clarissa Adams has not seen her parents Walter and Irmin Huber in 2,124 days.
Carol Nyburg has not seen her daughter Nancy in 2,898 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 3,702 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 3,018 days.
Dylan Gill has not seen his father Russell in 11,584 days.
Melissa Paris has not seen her father Jean-Francois in 7,503 days.
Valeska Paris has not seen her brother Raphael in 3,671 days.
Mirriam Francis has not seen her brother Ben in 3,252 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 3,513 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 2,551 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica in 2,264 days.
Marie Bilheimer has not seen her mother June in 1,789 days.
Charley Updegrove has not seen his son Toby in 1,319 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 5,879 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 3,019 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 3,339 days.
Roger Weller has not seen his daughter Alyssa in 8,194 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 3,313 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 1,669 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin and daughter Taryn in 5,972 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 2,078 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis in 2,480 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 2,352 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 1,935 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike and daughter Emily in 2,430 days.
Mary Jane Barry has not seen her daughter Samantha in 2,684 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 13,793 days.


Posted by Tony Ortega on July 30, 2020 at 07:00

E-mail tips to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We also post updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our new book with Paulette Cooper, Battlefield Scientology: Exposing L. Ron Hubbard’s dangerous ‘religion’ is now on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats. Our book about Paulette, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2019 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Underground Bunker (2012-2019), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Other links: BLOGGING DIANETICS: Reading Scientology’s founding text cover to cover | UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists | GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice | SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts | Shelly Miscavige, 14 years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Watch our short videos that explain Scientology’s controversies in three minutes or less…

Check your whale level at our dedicated page for status updates, or join us at the Underground Bunker’s Facebook discussion group for more frivolity.

Our non-Scientology stories: Robert Burnham Jr., the man who inscribed the universe | Notorious alt-right inspiration Kevin MacDonald and his theories about Jewish DNA | The selling of the “Phoenix Lights” | Astronomer Harlow Shapley‘s FBI file | Sex, spies, and local TV news | Battling Babe-Hounds: Ross Jeffries v. R. Don Steele


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