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Here’s an example of how Scientology’s ‘disconnection’ is designed to eat away at you

[Carol Nyburg, with the son, Jeff, who didn’t turn his back on her]

We’ve written several times about Carol Nyburg. Many ex-Scientologists remember her as the friendly accommodations registrar at the Flag Land Base — it was Carol’s job to get you placed in the right rooms when you came for an extended stay at Scientology’s spiritual mecca.

Like so many others, however, she was subjected to abuse as a Sea Org member and became disillusioned with leader David Miscavige. After 26 years in the Sea Org, Carol left, and was then declared a “suppressive person” — an enemy of the church.

One of the most difficult things about being declared for Carol was that her two children reacted to it in starkly different ways. Her son, Jeff, had also left the Sea Org and Scientology, but when his father asked him to cut off contact with Carol or risk being declared himself, he refused and stayed in touch with her.

Carol’s daughter Nancy, however, cut Carol entirely out of her life, as she was instructed to do. Nancy had grown up in Scientology’s “Cadet Org” and was a Sea Org worker herself from 1997 to 2004. She was a Scientology “public” when her mother was declared, someone who doesn’t work for the church.

And Carol lost more than her daughter. Nancy was the mother of three children, and when Nancy disconnected from her, Carol lost contact with her three grandchildren.


In 2016, Carol was one of several former Scientologists who participated in a television series about disconnection that has never aired. As part of her episode, Carol went to Clearwater hoping to set up a surprise visit with Nancy. But as they prepared to film an encounter, Carol was shown a photograph of Nancy — who was about eight months pregnant, something Carol was completely unaware of.

“She looked ready to deliver any minute. This was so startling to me that I just lost it completely. Then I got worried about seeing her at all and that it might be harmful to her – a shock for her as it was for me,” Carol told us.

She never got the chance to see Nancy — she and the film crew found out later that Scientology had learned Carol was in Clearwater, and ordered Nancy quickly out of town.

Since then, Carol has heard nothing from Nancy, or her grandchildren, or even if the new child was a boy or a girl.

Then, she was totally shocked when she and her sister received emails asking them for a donation to a fundraiser that Carol’s granddaughters were taking part in.


[Detail from the message Carol received]

The email encouraged Carol to help her granddaughter with a Girl Scouts fundraising program — and it was from a granddaughter she had never met.

“She was born in 2012. That was the year I was declared,” she says.

When she learned that her sister had received a similar message, she asked her sister — who had never been in Scientology — to reach out to Nancy to find out if they were meant to receive the emails. Was it a sign that Nancy was beginning to relent on disconnection, a sign that she might be letting her mother back into her life?

Carol’s sister sent Nancy a message.

“Wondering if the Girl Scout email was for real or a fake…how are you all? Your Mom misses you so much,” she wrote.

Carol was stunned when her sister shared with her Nancy’s reply:


“The email is real. We are doing great! The kids are getting so big now! I miss you tons and tons!!!!!!!”

Nancy sent her aunt some photographs to show how her kids had grown. The photos showed them decorating pumpkins and having fun in an indoor pool.

Carol was stunned. “I was elated, thinking that Nancy must know that my sister and I are tight and that I would see the pictures. I thought she was discreetly reaching out to me,” she tells us.

So, cautiously optimistic that she was really getting the chance to communicate with her daughter again, Carol sent this message…


I loved seeing the pictures. I never look at your FB page because it is too painful to see. Like “looky no touchy.” I love you and all the children very much. You did not mention the youngest one that was born in 2016. Was it a boy or girl and how is he or she.

I will always love you and pray for you and your family every day – and of course for me too.

Love, mom

“I innocently thought somehow she had seen the light and wanted to reconcile,” Carol says.

Then she got Nancy’s reply.

I just want to start out by saying that if you are connected to those crazy, family destroying, hate spreading, asshats, this will be my last email ever. Family is the most important and as a Christian – shoot it doesn’t matter what religion – that hate spreading shouldn’t happen. It’s not productive and it doesn’t help anyone.

It doesn’t bring people together. And family should stick together not seek to make others wrong or point fingers.

There are faults in every religion and name-calling, hate spreading, exposing others wrong doings, is really not the answer.

“When I got her response I was shocked and devastated at the change in her tone,” Carol says.


At that point Carol reached out to us, and wanted us to see the language in her daughter’s response. We told her it was very characteristic of Scientology to turn things upside down — Nancy has obviously been conditioned to believe that it’s the former members of the church and other outsiders who are causing the family separations, and not the church itself.

We have talked to enough former Scientologists affected by disconnection to know that this is one of its most devastating features — dealing with a moment of hope that something has changed, that a family reunion might be around the corner, only to be crushed again.

We asked Carol if she wanted to make Nancy’s message public, and she said she did. We emailed Nancy, asking her to talk with us about her statement to her mother. We got no reply. Carol also heard nothing more from Nancy.

But she decided not to leave it at that. She then sent this message to her daughter, knowing that she might never hear from her or her grandchildren again.

Nancy, I first went into shock after reading your response and was not going to answer back. However, praying about this whole situation and asking for guidance my response is that I love you and all your children, my grandchildren. I welcome you anytime you would agree to see me either there or here. My love is unconditional. I do not condone family separation and have no hatred towards you or any Scientologists. Quite simply that is all I can say at this moment. I love you and want you in my life.

Love, Your mother


Sheriff backed by Scientology loses re-election bid

On Monday we told you that officials from Scientology’s secretive Riverside County management compound, Int Base, had been quietly making donations to local political campaigns.

In particular, Int Base executives Muriel Dufresne and Catherine Fraser had donated $800 to the re-election campaign of Sheriff Stan Sniff.

Sniff was defeated yesterday by his challenger, a fellow Republican on his own staff, Lt. Chad Bianco.

In some consolation, however, the Board of Supervisors candidate they had backed, Russ Bogh, was victorious.


Scientology’s celebrities and ‘Ideal Orgs’ — now with comments!

[Elisabeth Moss, Michael Peña, and Laura Prepon]

We’re building landing pages about David Miscavige’s favorite playthings, including celebrities and ‘Ideal Orgs.’ We’re hoping you’ll join in and help us gather as much information as we can about them, in order to build a record and maintain a watch as Scientology continues its inexorable decline — and yes, we finally have comments working on these new pages! Head on over and help us with links and photos and comments.

Scientology’s celebrities, from A to Z! Find your favorite Hubbardite celeb at this index page — or suggest someone to add to the list!

Scientology’s ‘Ideal Orgs,’ from one end of the planet to the other! Help us build up pages about each these worldwide locations!

Today’s Ideal Org: Tampa, Florida!



Now on sale: Twice the Miss Lovely!

Our new book with Paulette Cooper, Battlefield Scientology: Exposing L. Ron Hubbard’s dangerous ‘religion’ is now on sale at Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats. What a pleasure it is for us to work with her on this after we wrote about her ordeal as a victim of Scientology’s “Fair Game” campaigns in our 2015 book, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, which is also on sale in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions.



[ONE year ago] Tonight on ‘Leah Remini’: ‘I just walked away from Scientology after seeing Leah’s show’
[TWO years ago] On the ballot tomorrow: The former lawman who let Scientology’s drug horror clinic off the hook
[THREE years ago] Desperate to hurt Going Clear‘s Oscar chances, Scientology goes down a dangerous path
[FOUR years ago] Scientologist (and Tea Partier) Brent Jones is elected to Nevada’s legislature
[FIVE years ago] Statistically Speaking: Jefferson Hawkins Takes Us Into Scientology’s Numbers Fixation
[SIX years ago] FOUR MORE YEARS!…Of Inaction On Scientology?


Scientology disconnection, a reminder

Bernie Headley has not seen his daughter Stephanie in 5,261 days.
Katrina Reyes has not seen her mother Yelena in 1,894 days
Sylvia Wagner DeWall has not seen her brother Randy in 1,374 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his grandson Leo in 437 days.
Geoff Levin has not seen his son Collin and daughter Savannah in 325 days.
Clarissa Adams has not seen her parents Walter and Irmin Huber in 1,500 days.
Carol Nyburg has not seen her daughter Nancy in 2,274 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 3,048 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 2,394 days.
Dylan Gill has not seen his father Russell in 10,960 days.
Melissa Paris has not seen her father Jean-Francois in 6,880 days.
Valeska Paris has not seen her brother Raphael in 3,047 days.
Mirriam Francis has not seen her brother Ben in 2,628 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 2,888 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 1,928 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica in 1,640 days.
Marie Bilheimer has not seen her mother June in 1,166 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 5,255 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 2,395 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 2,715 days.
Roger Weller has not seen his daughter Alyssa in 7,571 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 2,690 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 1,046 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin and daughter Taryn in 5,348 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 1,454 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis in 1,857 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 1,728 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 1,311 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike and daughter Emily in 1,816 days.
Mary Jane Sterne has not seen her daughter Samantha in 2,060 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 13,169 days.


3D-UnbreakablePosted by Tony Ortega on November 7, 2018 at 07:00

E-mail tips and story ideas to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We post behind-the-scenes updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our book, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2017 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Undergound Bunker (2012-2017), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Learn about Scientology with our numerous series with experts…

BLOGGING DIANETICS: We read Scientology’s founding text cover to cover with the help of L.A. attorney and former church member Vance Woodward
UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists
GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice
SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts

Other links: Shelly Miscavige, ten years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Watch our short videos that explain Scientology’s controversies in three minutes or less…

Check your whale level at our dedicated page for status updates

Join us at the Underground Bunker’s Facebook discussion group for more frivolity.

Our non-Scientology stories: Robert Burnham Jr., the man who inscribed the universe | Notorious alt-right inspiration Kevin MacDonald and his theories about Jewish DNA | The selling of the “Phoenix Lights” | Astronomer Harlow Shapley‘s FBI file | Sex, spies, and local TV news


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