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Scientology TV is the best thing to happen to television — says Scientology

 
Our thanks again to Rasha, who sped the latest copy of International Scientology News to us. You’ll be thrilled to hear that this issue contains startling information about Scientology’s new television network!

But first, we know you will want to see the latest portrait of church leader David Miscavige doing his usual pose at the lectern, this time at the 30th anniversary event to celebrate the 1988 launch of Scientology’s private cruise ship, the Freewinds

 

 
We also enjoyed this house ad about Scientology’s worldwide expansion — 67 Ideal Orgs and counting. This planet will be Cleared in no time!

 

 
And we noticed that former The Waltons star Judy Norton Taylor is getting more visible in church publications these days, and here she is with a Freedom Medal…

 

 
But amid all the usual hoopla, we thought you would be most interested in the magazine’s report on what was said about the new TV network during the event…

 

PUTTING THE PIECES TOGETHER

Representatives of International Management break down the big picture to illustrate how all the elements fall into place.

After Mr. Miscavige’s presentation the previous night, the OT Ambassadors had a 30,000-foot view of the progress made by Scientology since the last Maiden Voyage. Now, it was time to zero in, to get a closer look at the intersection of the Golden Age of Tech and the Golden Age of Dissemination. And it all comes down to your local Ideal Org (and the day when there will be one in every locale).

The afternoon seminar was opened by Mr. Nicholas Banks from the International Management Public Relations Office, who talked about the unprecedented progress made in recent years. “At the foundation of that advance, always and forever, are Ideal Orgs. In today’s seminar we will brief you on everything an Ideal Org is built to accomplish.” After a presentation that underscored the difference — in terms of space, delivery, and aesthetic appeal — between “before” and “after” Ideal, he turned the stage over to Mr. Daniel O’Farrell, from the International Landlord Office. “It is our crusade to get every Org on the planet to Ideal right now. And with Scientology TV driving multitudes into our Churches, this has taken on a whole new level of importance.” He then went over the steps — from fundraising to building acquisition to space plans and Org designs through construction — that it takes to get to a grand opening.

Once an Org becomes Ideal, it must remain in Ideal condition, and yes, we’ve got the tech for that. Our eco-friendly cleaning program has its own manuals and checklists, and teams are trained in proper maintenance.

The seminar moved from inside the Ideal Orgs to a look at the inner workings of the Scientology Network with Mr. Kiernan McIntyre from Scientology Media Productions. His “How do they do that?” presentation went behind-the-scenes of our fully integrated, multimedia complex, which is unlike any studio on Earth. He outlined the groundbreaking technique the SMP team came up with to provide closed captions in 17 languages in real time to a global streaming audience. A first in television history. To the delight of the audience he said, “When Amazon heard about it, they called us to find out how we did it.” It was just one example of how SMP has created a gold standard in television, as he said, “All for making a better world, in this Golden Age of Dissemination.”

Mr. Quentin Strom was up next to talk about the connectivity between our television programming, the internet and our Orgs. While the Scientology Network is available on DIRECTV Channel 320 in the United States, the rest of the world (and those who don’t subscribe to the satellite service) access it through apps or directly through Scientology.tv. During the network kickoff, Mr. Strom reported, “We overloaded Amazon’s Cloud streaming servers with a launch bigger than Thursday Night Football…which added up to more than half a million new video stream requests every minute!”

Since we know viewers are curious about Scientology, our websites are designed so that after watching a program, they are easily directed to more information about a particular humanitarian program, to take an OCA test or to learn more about a Scientology Life Improvement Course. “Our TV is driving viewers to enroll in these new online courses from more than 160 countries since launch, completing a checksheet step every 30 seconds” and that, said Mr. Strom, “is an online course completion rate that’s 10 times anything in our history.”

The final speaker for the afternoon was Mr. Jason Hemphill from the International Ideal Org Unit. With the launch of the Scientology Network, thousands more are walking into our Orgs every week, he said. These first-time visitors are people who have already seen our shows, who have a sense of what Scientology is all about and can do for them. “They are telling us exactly what book they need and exactly what service they need to enroll on. Now more than ever, the Org that they walk into must be an Ideal Org.”

While the network is a driving factor in getting new people into the Org, once there, network programming is helping to drive home the message of Scientology. “We are now providing a way for anyone who walks into our Ideal Orgs to see all of our shows on an on-demand basis, with a Public Information Center Display dedicated solely to the Scientology Network.” He closed with a report on the unprecedented expansion within the Ideal Orgs since the launch of the network, which brought him back to the beginning of his briefing. “With the numbers of new Scientologists growing exponentially, and the demand for Dianetics and Scientology on a straight up and vertical climb, it is up to us to fill that demand, and it can only be done with an Ideal Org.”

On that note, the audience filed out of the Starlight to huddle with their Committee members and schedule meetings with Management representatives, so they could get down to the business of building more Ideal Orgs.

Somehow, no matter what Miscavige claims to accomplish, the result is always more demands for fundraising from church members.

It’s an Ideal arrangement, you might say.

 
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MEANWHILE, AT FACEBOOK…

 

 
Please join us at the Underground Bunker’s Facebook discussion group for more frivolity.

 
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Scientology disconnection, a reminder

Bernie Headley has not seen his daughter Stephanie in 5,193 days.
Katrina Reyes has not seen her mother Yelena in 1,796 days
Brian Sheen has not seen his grandson Leo in 339 days.
Geoff Levin has not seen his son Collin and daughter Savannah in 227 days.
Clarissa Adams has not seen her parents Walter and Irmin Huber in 1,402 days.
Carol Nyburg has not seen her daughter Nancy in 2,176 days.
Jamie Sorrentini Lugli has not seen her father Irving in 2,950 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 2,296 days.
Dylan Gill has not seen his father Russell in 10,862 days.
Mirriam Francis has not seen her brother Ben in 2,530 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 2,790 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 1,830 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica in 1,542 days.
Marie Bilheimer has not seen her mother June in 1,068 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 5,157 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 2,297 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 2,617 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 2,592 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 948 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin and daughter Taryn in 5,250 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 1,356 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis in 1,759 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 1,631 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 1,213 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike and daughter Emily in 1,718 days.
Mary Jane Sterne has not seen her daughter Samantha in 1,962 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 13,071 days.

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3D-UnbreakablePosted by Tony Ortega on August 1, 2018 at 07:00

E-mail tips and story ideas to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We post behind-the-scenes updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our book, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2017 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Undergound Bunker (2012-2017), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Learn about Scientology with our numerous series with experts…

BLOGGING DIANETICS: We read Scientology’s founding text cover to cover with the help of L.A. attorney and former church member Vance Woodward
UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists
GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice
SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts

Other links: Shelly Miscavige, ten years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Our non-Scientology stories: Robert Burnham Jr., the man who inscribed the universe | Notorious alt-right inspiration Kevin MacDonald and his theories about Jewish DNA | The selling of the “Phoenix Lights” | Astronomer Harlow Shapley‘s FBI file | Sex, spies, and local TV news

 

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