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San Diego’s new Scientology ‘Ideal Org’ looks like it’s ready for its close-up

David_Miscavige_2015IAS

[Coming soon to San Diego?]

This summer, we covered the opening of Scientology’s newest Ideal Org in this country, its two new buildings in Harlem. We wrote at some length about the methods that Scientology used to try to keep us from reporting that event, and what fun we had. So which will be the next Scientology “Ideal Org” opened in the U.S.? After a photo we received from a couple of tipsters this week, we think the next David Miscavige grand opening event might happen in San Diego.

The path to an Ideal Org in San Diego has been a difficult one. Way back in 2006, wealthy San Diego Scientologists Kurt and Jenny Listug paid $13.08 million for the Chicago Title Insurance Co. building downtown, which had a pretty funky look to it. Our sources told us that the Listugs offered it to the church to use as an Ideal Org and replace the longtime home of Scientology in San Diego, a building on 4th Avenue just south of Ash Street. The national office turned their noses up at the Listugs’ offer, and so the couple sold it for $13.6 million.

The national office instead coveted the campus of Coleman Preparatory School, an 8.6-acre property in La Mesa, about 11 miles from downtown San Diego. By 2013, they’d changed their minds again and sold the Coleman campus site, and then we learned that they intended to end up where they started, renovating the old facility on 4th Avenue.

As renovations have been going on, the church has been housed in a temporary location in an industrial park north of downtown. And now, things are looking nearly complete at the 4th Ave location…

 
scisandiego4

 
Could San Diego be the next place for a grand opening? If you know about another location which is closer to completion, let us know.

Skip Young tells us he might be interested in showing up if David Miscavige comes to his town. “Maybe I’ll go shake his hand,” he laughed.

We asked him what had happened since our story about him in March.

Skip occupies an interesting place in Scientology history and provided a footnote in the infamous Snow White Program. But more importantly to him, he’s lost contact with his two daughters, who disconnected from him once he moved away from the church.

We asked him what had changed since we last spoke with him.

“I heard from a friend that I’ve been declared,” he said. But he didn’t sound very surprised to learn that the church has now officially excommunicated him.

As for his daughters, he thinks the younger one, Alexis, who is in the Sea Org, may have gotten married. “I don’t even know who the guy is,” he said, sounding chagrined.

He’s not giving up trying to get them back in his life.

“On October 8, my birthday, I sent them both birthday cards. They were addressed to me as if they had written them,” he said with a laugh. He wanted to get them thinking about what they were missing after breaking up the family.

Skip’s daughters live in Florida, where they work for the church.

Back in San Diego, he’s about to get a reminder with a new Ideal Org on the way that Scientology will do what it can to keep him from ever seeing his daughters again.

 
SkipYoungDaughters2

 
UPDATE: And here it is, proof that the grand opening is imminent! Note there’s no date on the flier. But it can’t be too far off now…

 
sdinvite

 
——————–

Chris Shelton on ‘Scientology’

 

 
——————–

HowdyCon 2017 – the website!

 
HowdyCon2017

 
We hope you can join us in Denver this June for this website’s second annual convention, HowdyCon 2017. Denver resident Kim O’Brien is organizing things for us, and her hard work has paid off in the form of a website. Please give it a visit and start making your plans!

 
——————–

Bonus items from our tipsters

Hey, girl. I donated $250,000 and for that I got this Patron Meritorious jacket. Come over the Star Trek air bridge to Flag with me!

 
sciflag11

 
For a limited time only!

 
cchrshirt

 
Back home in his native San Francisco, Scientology’s in-house rapper Chill EB attends a protest of the Dakota Access Pipeline. Is there hope for him yet?

 
chillebsf

 
——————–

3D-UnbreakablePosted by Tony Ortega on November 17, 2016 at 07:00

E-mail tips and story ideas to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We post behind-the-scenes updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our book, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information about the book, and our 2015 book tour, can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

Learn about Scientology with our numerous series with experts…

BLOGGING DIANETICS: We read Scientology’s founding text cover to cover with the help of L.A. attorney and former church member Vance Woodward
UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists
GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice
SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts

Other links: Shelly Miscavige, ten years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | Scientology’s Private Dancer | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | Scientology boasts about assistance from Google | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Our Guide to Alex Gibney’s film ‘Going Clear,’ and our pages about its principal figures…
Jason Beghe | Tom DeVocht | Sara Goldberg | Paul Haggis | Mark “Marty” Rathbun | Mike Rinder | Spanky Taylor | Hana Whitfield

 

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  • Andrea ‘i-Betty’ Garner

    Chris Shelton’s vid missing, Tony 🙂

  • Terapined

    Knowledge Report update please

  • PickAnotherID

    While we’re waiting for Chris’s video, don’t forget it’s ‘National Baklava Day’: (f5)
    http://nationaldays.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/baklava.jpg

    Good thing the coffee’s ready!

    • LongtimeLurker

      It’s 11:22pm here.

      How am I supposed to get some of that now that you made me want it?

      • chukicita

        I’d make ya some. I had a Greek roommate once; her mom showed me how. Only I am not spending all day stretching dough out to paper-thin over the backs of my hands, I’ll just buy frozen phyllo dough at the store. Painting butter between every sheet makes it melt in your mouth, and I like it with pecans instead of walnuts. The honey-based syrup should be poured over it just before eating.

        • LongtimeLurker

          Thanks!

          Definitely frozen pastry.

          That description has me freakin’ out.

          I’m gonna have an inappropriate midnight Snickers to calm down.

          • chukicita

            Aw, you should try making it! The trick is to keep a damp towel over the phyllo sheets as you lay them out so they don’t dry out while you are painting them with butter.

            • LongtimeLurker

              I will.

              Although not now.

              Thanks for the tip, too.

        • MarcabExpat

          Ditto on the pecans vs walnuts. Hazelnuts work too. Walnuts are just too bitter in that context.

          • gtsix

            You are wrong. Report to the nut factory. Walnuts are perfectn baklava.

            • MarcabExpat

              Mm-hmm. You prolly think corn syrup is the best syrup for pecan pie, too.

            • gtsix

              Don’t you date blaspheme the pecan pie so close to thanksgiving!

              You probably pronouce pecan as peeecan rather than the silky peh-khan. Heathen!

            • MarcabExpat

              Peecan? What do you take me for, some Yankee hoodlum? Down here is where we grow the Peh-KAHNs!

              And it won’t be long before I am once again baking my annual sacramental pecan pie…. with REAL MAPLE SYRUP. Any lesser syrup is unworthy of this holy pie. Here endeth the reading.

          • chukicita

            Ooo I gotta try hazelnuts. With a schmear of Nutella, perhaps.

            • MarcabExpat

              I… think we may have opened a new portal here!

            • chukicita

              I’m totally making this.

            • MarcabExpat

              PHOTOS OBLIGATORY. May the Force be with you.

      • PickAnotherID

        You don’t have a 24hr bakery nearby?? Bummer.

        • LongtimeLurker

          We do actually.

          I’m just hella lazy.

      • Rasha

        XD

    • gtsix

      Get in mah belly!

  • LongtimeLurker

    Second photo. Disabled access sticker.

    It’s “making the able more able”.

    Not giving freakin’ charity to unenabled legless wogs in wheelchairs!

    If they’re gonna pull-in that stuff (especially the ones born that way – pffft why would they choose that?! Craziness!) Scientology is not here to pander to them by letting them easily access Ideal Orgs.

    This is some freakin’ out-exchange, counter-intentioned entheta BS.

    What the hell San Diego?

    • PickAnotherID

      I see the sticker, but where’s the “Automatic Door” warning and button???

      • Rasha

        WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES???

        • PickAnotherID

          Well…I enslaved a planet once playing ‘Star Empires’…

      • LongtimeLurker

        If you can’t dodge an unexpected automatic door…they don’t want you.

    • picketflag247

      Maybe staff members imply that Scientology will help them walk again, the way LRH mentioned that Scientologists don’t get sick or need glasses. These promises aren’t in writing though.

      “Arthritis vanishes, myopia gets better, heart
      illness decreases, asthma disappears, stomachs function properly and
      the whole catalogue of illnesses goes away and stays away.” – LRH

    • MarcabExpat

      It always cracks me up when I see this. AS IF a Forlorn Waiter Suit would offer me anything but a dirty look if I rolled up to the door. The best is the beautifully laid out disabled parking at the Rim of the World base.

      • LongtimeLurker

        I hope my channelling an imaginary angry Scientologist in my comment didn’t enturbulate you.

        I’m just offended by the bald-faced hypocrisy.

        • MarcabExpat

          LOLOLOL I read you right no worries. Once in a blue moon I take my wheels and myself into the Flag Starbucks if I’m out that way. It’s almost fun enturbulating the locals by looking more cheerful sitting down than they do standing up.

          • LongtimeLurker

            Good, I thought you would have.

            Do they really get freaked out? smh

            Are the staff at that Starbucks Scientologists, do you know?

            If I ever get to Florida, I am so going there for a soy latte.

            • MarcabExpat

              Oh, you gotta go, it’s great ambiance for an SP. I’ve made three attempts to take my Miss Lovely book photo there, only to be foiled each time by Uncaring Husband who has decided he’s no longer a fan of their Clover coffee (which was my excuse to get there). He knows I love to people-watch, but it’s more trouble to go there than to a nearby indie place with way better coffee.

              It’s not actually on the grounds of Flag, but across the street from it. You’re still at ground zero though, and you can always see Sea Orcs having a cup with publics or whomever it is they’re holding their little meetings with. Some amazing shit has gone down in that cafe. I didn’t think the staff were Scilons when I was there, but someone here has posted that these staff are in fact “staff.” If so, they act a lot more normal than average Scn staff, and they’ve been nice to me.

              To get there by car, you have to park on the street beside at least one Scientology building and probably between two. There are Woebegotten Street Waiters* pacing back and forth everywhere, watching everything, practicing their Brisk Important Strut and trying to look busy. Once I actually did see a young man being routed in, which was so sad.

              They don’t overtly *act* freaked out – they’ve got their manners in, or what counts for manners in Sea Orcs. I’ve never been harassed, or had someone flee. But they do silently glare at me, or if they say something ostensibly polite, it’s in an unmistakably sneering, hostile tone. I had one stand there in the sidewalk blocking me; two others have stepped aside with exaggerated sweeping motions, like they’re showing such uncalled-for grace in letting a cripple pass. The most common reaction in Sea Orcs is a fearful look and simple avoidance — changing direction for no reason, or walking past with head turned the other way.

              *I always have to include one waiter joke, because on one of these ventures we took with us an older friend who knew Scientology was a cult but not much more than that, and was mystified by the legions of “waiters walking the streets,” in her words. She had assumed there was a huge banquet service company nearby, until we explained things to her.

            • LongtimeLurker

              You are so cool. This is my favorite story this week. I screen-capped it.

              Thank you.

              I stupidly thought it was on the grounds, like the cafe at the Melbourne Org, but maybe that’s just an Australian thing.

              I can’t believe the gutless passive aggressive BS way they’re interacting with you. I mean…I can totally believe it, but come on, try not to be douches 24/7 for god’s sake.

              If I ever make it there. Remind me to take a Miss Lovely picture for you.

            • MarcabExpat

              Aww, thanks 🙂 If you ever make it here, we are going there together and taking a joint Miss Lovely photo! I like going there, and I know it annoys them, so why not, is my motto. Plus, when Bunkeroos are in the same town, they meet up, that’s the rule 🙂

              Not stupid of you to assume it was on the grounds, it’s just how the street is laid out. Flag is different from some Orgs in that rather than being a separate complex, they just took over a huge chunk of the downtown area. (This is how they took over the city originally, they just bought up a bunch of property under a bogus name.) So you have this vast complex of multiple buildings, and miscellaneous stuff mixed in along the street like Starbucks and a Christian Science Reading Room. There is another cafe inside Flag, of course (the renderings for it are in Tony’s old Village Voice post of leaked architectural drawings), but this is a regular Starbucks that has been there for years. Everything else just surrounds it. The amount of pedestrian traffic though, is dwarfed by the constant stream of Flag Sea Org buses zipping to and fro.

              If you’ve never strolled through the area via Google Maps, it’s worth a look. The Starbucks address is 433 Cleveland St, Clearwater, FL 33755. Everything is within close walking distance: the Ft Harrison, Super Power, all the auxiliary buildings. If you get a coffee and sit in the little open-air pavilion, you’re across the corner from the old Bank building that is now Sea Org Land; the tall red brick building facing you is full of Sea Orcs trying to get through their day. You can see them through the windows staring glumly at computer screens. I watched a Forlorn Waiter typing fitfully until he gave up and sat for several minutes with his head in his hands. He looked miserable, but probably he was fatigued, maybe even dozing there like that.

              Since you liked that story, I’ll add to it: on the day we had our older friend with us, she realized on the way out that she wasn’t sure of her way back to the main highway (we were taking two cars). She decided to pull over into the nearest parking lot to write down directions before parting ways from us. Sensible, right? Except that she pulled into the main Sea Org bus parking without realizing it.

              There were half a dozen Sea Orcs lounging out there and they all took off running toward us. At the same moment, one of those monster Flag buses tried to pull into the lot, only to find some stupid wog passenger car in its way. The driver promptly slammed on the horn and held it down. I yelled MARY LOU DRIVE THE CAR DRIVE THE CAR NOW JUST GO GET OUT OF HERE NOW GO GO GO and that is how I got to see my beloved dignified seventy-year-old friend and mentor pull a magnificent Steve McQueen and peel out so expertly and so fast you would have thought Xenu himself was on our tail. We didn’t know she could drive like that. Later, after we’d pulled over again in a safe spot, she declared, “boy, those waiters mean BUSINESS.”

              So, I’ve never done a protest, but I’ve still managed to piss off the Sea Org 🙂

            • LongtimeLurker

              “If you ever make it here, we are going there together and taking a joint Miss Lovely photo!”

              Absolutely, yes!

              They haven’t run the poor Christian Scientists out? I’m surprised.

              I did a quick run through on Google maps a while back, but don’t remember the Starbucks. I’ll go again.

              “…Forlorn Waiter typing fitfully until he gave up and sat for several minutes with his head in his hands…”

              Oh god.

              That parking lot story is fantastic.

              They’re so easily riled, aren’t they?

              Like 0 to 100 at the drop of a hat.

              Doesn’t seem very OT to me.

            • MarcabExpat

              Whenever I see one of those poor slobs I wonder how far up the Bridge they’ve even got. They’re almost all young at Flag, and once you’ve signed that billion-year contract you’re rarely going to get enough sleep to be sessionable.

              Sure wish I’d taken video that day 🙂

    • I know of a disabled, practising, Scientologist.

      Let’s be honest, if they have money ‘special arrangements’ will be made to insure nobody is honest about Scientology’s attitude towards them, and the parts that can’t be avoided will be ‘interpreted’ away.

      I doubt this happens very often, but when they need the money, they will ‘compromise’.

      • LongtimeLurker

        I know…*hangs head*…

        It was low-hanging fruit and a soft target. And not even entirely true.

        But you know, some lurker might read it and think “Yeah, there’s that one senior staff member who’s always denigrating disabled people.”

        …I mean probably not, but…

        • Er… I only meant to say that even bigots will make an exception when it’s to their advantage, and I have seen an example of this.

          Having said that, it’s a UK org with a membership of approx 30 all told, who are under constant pressure to pay for their ideal org – so they are desperate. It’s likely a very rare exception.

          I don’t doubt that the attitudes among Scientologists in general (and especially in the Sea Org) is exactly as you presented it – and it was very clear that you were ‘channelling’ the way that Scientologists really are taught to view disability.

          • LongtimeLurker

            Ahhh…sorry…it’s late/early over here

            Yes, the hypocritical exception rule. Delightful.

            Is the person in question in very deep, do you know?

            • Don’t know. She spends time there, sitting behind a desk reading, while nobody comes in – but so do lots of people.

              The situation here is somewhat different to that in the US, if only because there is a state safety net that insures you still eat and have somewhere to live, after they clear you out.

            • LongtimeLurker

              COMMIES!

              kidding

  • Chee Chalker

    A little OT…… has the documentary ‘Deprogrammed’ been mentioned yet?
    It’s on Netflix.
    Scientology, the world’s cruelest religion, gets a few mentions
    Appearance by Rick Ross too!

    Very interesting history of the deprogramming movement

    • And a properly critical one, by the sound of reviews. I would really like to see that. It might not be quite what you think it is.

      • Chee Chalker

        I watched it last night
        It’s very good. It focuses on Ted Patrick who was one of the first people who ‘kidnapped’ people (at the family’s request) held in cults.

        It’s more focused on the Moonies and a cult called the Christ Family.

        But Rick Ross talks about how Scientology sued CAN out of existence.

        It’s worth a watch IMO. If for nothing else the fact that, once again, Scientology is listed as a cult in a documentary

        • Thank you. I will try to find a place where I can view it.

          It’s just that I’m highly sceptical about the notions that:

          a) ‘Brainwashing’, as understood in the period (something that was done to US prisoners of War by the Chinese) is a valid idea at all, let alone a valid explanation for ‘cult’ membership in 21st century free societies.
          b) That two wrongs make a right – they brainwashed my loved one, so I will brainwash them back to ‘normality’ (which inevitably involves imposing your standards on them).
          c) That the practice was effective. Despite the claims of the (highly paid, unqualified) reprogrammers, there is little or no long-term evidence that their activities made a difference.

          Just to be clear – I’m not saying that organisations like Scientology don’t manipulate and control their members to an incredible extent. I’m say that the theoretical construct ‘brainwashing’ is a very bad explanation for it.

          It is unfortunate that this approach was adopted as an explanation by the early ‘anti-cult’ movement, and some people still try to make it fit, despite the fact that ‘brainwashing’ was rejected by the US Government as early as 1956.

          In 1956, the psychiatrists Lawrence Hinkle and Harold Wolf , of Cornell University, undertook an exhaustive study of brainwashing, with the support of the government and full access to the secret files of the CIA as well as some former communist interrogators and their prisoners.

          Their declassified, but conveniently overlooked, report refutes the effectiveness of all efforts to brainwash anyone – especially through inducing altered states of consciousness. Where thought-reform techniques do seem to have produced results, they argue, we are merely witnessing behavioural compliance brought on by threats and the experience of physical abuse.

          Ref: 1994 “Brainwashing and Totalitarian Influence”, pgs 457 – 71 in Encyclopaedia of Human Behaviour , Vol 1. San Diego Calif.: Academic Press.

          Before someone accuses me of being a cult apologist (it has happened, when I have presented this argument) I’m not denying that the CofS practices unconscionable manipulation and coercion. I’m saying that, to understand what it going on, we should consult the developments that have taken place in psychology (especially social psychology) and sociology over the 60 years since, not stick with a rejected idea because it has a tradition.

          • Chee Chalker

            The documentary does show several people on whom the approach did not work (they returned to their cults). So it does present both sides

            As far as ‘brainwashing’, IMO they can call it whatever they like, but the truth of the matter is some kind of influence is used (I think it’s closer to hypnotism) and perpetuated by cutting them off from others (disconnection) or information (entheta).
            How else to explain Jonestown (I know for some there was force) ? But many people drank that koolaid willingly. Undue influence, brainwashing, whatever…….when someone has that kind of control
            over you, it’s not a good thing. Sometimes you have to fight fire with fire.

            • Sometimes, it may seem that you have to fight fire with fire.

              However, I believe that you need to learn more about fire, so that you know how to put it out – and that fire-fighters who throw gasoline into your burning home are doing more harm than good.

              As for Jonestown, once all of those people were isolated in the jungle, force did indeed take over along with the corruption that comes with power – you can see a glimpse of how this situation can get out of hand in the Stanford Prison experiment
              https://scicrit.wordpress.com/2014/05/05/understanding-the-scientology-mindset-part-4-power-corrupts-the-stanford-prison-experiment/

              That’s perhaps as close as you get to the situation of US POWs that inspired the idea of ‘brainwashing’. The experts dismissed that as “behavioural compliance brought on by threats and the experience of physical abuse.” (see above) and I think the same assessment stands for Jonestown.

              Where ‘brainwashing theory’ completely fails is explaining why so many decent, well-intentioned people followed Jones, to the extent of giving over all their assets and thought that establishing an isolated community in the middle of nowhere was a good idea.

              Remember, Jones’ ‘Church’ prospered for many years in the US, and that is where they raised the money for his utopian project. These people were not beaten to a pulp (as US POWs were) they were persuaded.

              My struggle to understand what happens in this kind of situation centres on growing social isolation https://scicrit.wordpress.com/understanding-the-scientology-mindset-series/ As in the case of Scientology, this can be very bad – but the CofS is moderated by the fact that it is embedded within a civil society ruled by law.

              To ‘go full Jonestown’, I think you have to have to remove yourself from all legal restraint (as Jones did, by establishing his colony in an isolated place where his word was law).

              There are exceptions, of course, but these are typically organisations which become both insanely isolated and inward-looking, like Heaven’s Gate.

              In that case, there was no apparent coercion applied – unlike Jonestown, where people were forced to drink poison at gunpoint (and shot when they didn’t) they all did so voluntarily.

              We know why people comply when faced with a credible threat. The outstanding question is how they got into that situation in the first place. Initial recruitment to high-control groups is, however, much more subtle than that, and it is from that recruitment that all else follows.

  • BosonStark

    San Diego — ideal weather, ideal org, and ideal Internet to look up what a con Scientology is. Isn’t having con man for president in 2017 enough? It’s not like people will need more fraud in their lives.

    • LongtimeLurker

      FRAUD MORE YEARS! FRAUD MORE YEARS!

      …no wait…

      FOUR MORE FRAUDS! FOUR MORE FRAUDS!

      …nope…darn…

    • Chee Chalker

      Speaking of ideal weather……70+ degrees here today in Chicago.

      Supposed to snow on Saturday 😬

      • MarcabExpat

        I’m outside Ann Arbor right now, same thing. My friend is going do to some final gardening and then weatherproof things for tomorrow. Bizarre.

  • Ella Raitch

    I think you may yet get to talk to Mr Chill E B, Tony. Let’s hope it’s an exit interview.

    • MarcabExpat

      He’s lookin’ like a mannequin in that photo. At least the chin pubes are still dauntless.

    • Tony Ortega

      Actually, I did get that chance, five years ago almost to this day…

      http://www.villagevoice.com/news/chill-eb-and-me-rappin-about-scientology-6690822

      • Ella Raitch

        Huh…I kinda remembered you having some interaction, but forgot it was so extended (this was right at the start of my Scientology watching)

  • Newiga

    Undrugable, Unshockable? The words of House Hubbard? As a Nordic girl, I prefer the Stark one.

    • Eivol Ekdal

      Don’t we all?… I think

      • Newiga

        For sure. 😉 Sorry about the typos. Secretly visiting the Bunker at work. 😀

        • Eivol Ekdal

          I will whisper… ok?

          • Newiga

            Please! I don’t want to get caught. I have a few warnings under my belt already. ;P

            • Rasha

              You are one OT SP, kid! ^_^

            • Newiga

              I can’t help it. I was born that way. 😎

        • Rasha

          That’s my Newi!!! ^_^

        • chukicita

          You mean, “work?”

    • noseinabk

      Those t-shirts only emphasize the paranoid conspiracy nuttiness. Flunk.

  • MCurie

    I’d wanted to post a Reply to Jack99’s top post yesterday “According to those who have acchieved OT, the spiritual benefits obtained surpass description.”
    I beg to differ! I think wroom, pffhhh, kachooo are pretty good descriptions.
    and I (MCurie) wanted to ask if generally considered that all this feel-good wroom/prrhhh/kachooo stuff from Scientologists is actually induced hypomania?
    On this link scroll ~2/3 down to the “what does hypomania feel like? section…
    http://psycheducation.org/diagnosis/
    ’cause it sounds like Scientology success stories !

    • grundoon

      A success story is obligatory upon completing a service. If it lacks the obligatory elements, such as enthusiasm, there are consequences.

      This creates a difficulty for Scientologists, since the benefits tend to be personal, subjective and transitory, and Scientologists are not allowed to discuss their “case” or the Scientology materials. They learn to satisfy the examiner by making success stories out of conventionally acceptable elements. Whooshes and zooms are popular because they fill the space and signify enthusiasm without actually saying anything – so the “success” is left to the imagination and need not be described.

      After writing a success story, the next stop is the registrar to purchase the next service. Hypomania would please the registrar. Sometimes it happens, sometimes it is faked.

  • BosonStark

    So besides the t-shirt and a shit-ton of junk mail asking for more money, and important data about the conspiracy of the evil psychs to rule this planet, what does a CCHR membership offer? Maybe they should throw a cheap taser in the package, so members can test their unshockabilityness.

    • kemist

      That would also be useful to get rid of regges.

      • BosonStark

        “So you want to security check me? First let me test your unshockability.” I wish Scientology required all members to wear t-shirts that had a picture of Dianutty on the front and the Commodore on the back. That would be so theta. It would also thin down their membership to a couple hundred within a few months.

        • Tracy Schmitz

          yeah, why not, i mean he was so great, is so great, is “source” why wouldn’t they walk around with hubbard’s face and dianutty plastered front and back?! i mean wouldn’t that be great p.r. and a nice touch to spread the word, and clear the planet! (sarcasm)..would’t it be amazing and well quite frankly snarkly funny if someone once raised that to anyone in charge as a great idea and see the response?!…

          • That would be one of those occasions where dissonance would be rapidly followed by rationalisation.

            At some level, they would know they would be shunned &/or mocked for wearing such a thing. They might even by congratulated by members of the general public, who mistook it for satire.

            Consequently all kinds of excuses would be offered for not doing so:

            a) The wogs aren’t capable of understanding the true meaning of such a thing
            b) It would expose the wearer to attacks from psychs and SPs
            c) The images might restimulate wogs, and do more harm than good

            Of course, these ‘reasons’ don’t make sense – but they don’t have to, inside the bubble. They just need to rationalise the fact that, for most people who understand what those images mean, wearing them would make you a figure of fun &/or suspicion.

            I think that few Scientologists would be comfortable advertising their membership – but they all feel the same, and don’t mention it. Anyone who had the bad taste to bring it up would likely be shut up.

            I suspect someone who seriously made such a suggestion would quickly learn about doublethink, when he was sent to ‘ethics’ for it.

            • ze moo

              The ‘steak house waiter’ that staff have to wear is close enough to a uniform. The Public would never go that wash and wear route. At least, not outside of any clam ‘briefing’ or ‘event’.

      • they have to audit that electronic incident out again in session. Over and over!

        • Rasha

          Some folks will pay extra for that. Scientology is a perfect environment for masochists.

          • just what LRH(C) wanted to do with his e-meter to take out the last BT

  • Username

    For me, reading the news today that Scientology is going to revive that old downtown org as a ideal org is like reading the city is going to reopen a old landfill in my neighborhood. An appearance from Anonamous would be greatly welcomed.

  • OOkpik

    Hey, dude.
    Wearing an IAS jacket with “Patron Meritorious” emblazoned on it is akin to wearing a big “L” tattoo on your forehead.

    Please, RUN and don’t look back.

  • kemist

    Scientogists don’t need a t-shirt that says “undruggable”, they need one that says “Unsolvable”. Also, “BTs inside” on the back.

    • Rasha

      “Unthinkable”
      “Untrustable”
      “Unworkable”
      “Unable”

      • Rasha

        “Unacceptable”

      • chukicita

        Unemployable.

  • noseinabk

    Off-topic heads up to OSA. Who is manning the store on your scientology Pennsylvania fb page? Forget the password? There are more sp posts than members. You’re welcome.

  • Username

    What if…. at the ideal org opening, I handed out dvds titled “David Miscavige Greatest Moments” but really inside were copies of Going Clear. I think that would be fun!

  • Jeb Burton

    Do the parents of these children ever think twice about bringing them up in the cult? You must know about disconnection. If the kids reject the church, or in this case the parent, you must know you can never see them again. The parents are partially to blame.

    • Chee Chalker

      I think it’s a case of ‘it will never happen to us.’

      • Sunny

        And “I have introduced my children to their eternal salvation”.
        And nothing (NOTHING) else matters.

        • Chee Chalker

          You have to hand it to Katie Holmes. She played that whole thing beautifully….taking on Big Being #2 and winning?!
          She must have seen enough examples of robot children or families torn apart.
          Of course, why she even got involved with BB #2 is anoher question.

          I hope the OSABots reading this think about that…..how SPs like Katie and Leah are able to drive the Big Beings into hiding

    • ithilien

      They never think its going to happen to them. Its like a pile of caterpillars crawling over each other to get to the top. Sara goldberg raised her son to be as she described, the poster boy of scientology, a great kid, volunteering and doing his all. Leah rimini was a powerhouse scientologist, donating programming and writing kr s on everyone including her husband. Then the ax fell, and they wander about in shock. Its hard for the insiders when they are cast aside or realize they are being used

      • Jeb Burton

        I feel for them. I hate fucking scientologists and their sick cult.

        • ithilien

          I think one of my kids might have gotten dragged in if we hadnt changed schools but i would have never led my kids into it.

  • Sunny

    Regarding “hey girl” dude above.
    I can’t decide whether to thank him or hate him.
    He was staff at Valencia Org (Venezuela) when I was there. He was an auditor.
    While I was in VZA in Universe Corps, he stalked me for months. Then he told lies about me. Which resulted in me getting Comm Eved and removed from Venezuela, back to LA.
    I guess now I am out and free I will go ahead and thank him. His lies led the path of my supposed out ethics. Meh.
    I find it hard to believe he had the money to do any services at Flag. My guess is Valencia Org sent him for training. That Saint Hill sized org could not pay or feed the staff while I was there.

    • MissCandle

      Look who’s better off now!

    • “Universe Corps” did they actually bring that around 🙂

    • Rasha

      *singing* We get Suunnyyy!! We get Suuunnyyy!!!….

    • LongtimeLurker

      My favourite type of guy (or girl) in the world is the “I really like you…oh you don’t want anything to do with me? Well suddenly I realy hate you…because I’m an emotional 8-year-old.” type of guy.

      Idiot.

      Did Saint Hill size Valencia Org also have Saint Hill size staff numbers?

      • Sunny

        There were a lot of staff, but I never counted them. Maybe around 150 or so.
        Only 2 of them were Clear, and one OT (who apparently moved to Miami since).
        This was in 2002.

        • LongtimeLurker

          Thanks Sunny.

          Wow, that is a lot.

          And not very many Clears or OTs.

          • Sunny

            Probably not very many were actually Scientologists there. I would guess maybe 25 or 30 of them were actually die-hards. Rest just showed up for something to do.
            Venezuela is a different world, different culture, different priorities. Very different but wonderful place (so sad to see the state it is in now with people starving).

      • Libertylover

        Hi LL. Why did you switch to a minifig avatar? As a Lego fan, I was wondering if I missed something in the story. I am being nosy

        • LongtimeLurker

          Hey other LL.

          No problem, I am the nosiest of nosies.

          Anyhoo…I thought there was a Legoland in San Diego…

          …darn…I better check.

          The other thing I knew about San Diego is the USS Midway, but I didn’t want to dishonor her.

          btw – your minifig is one of my favourites.

          I combined it with Lizard Suit Guy and made a little “Godzilla Attacks New York” vignette.

          • ze moo

            You have too much free time. $cientology and $cieno watching can help you with that. Now, take our personality test.

            1. Do you like to spend time with models? And can you assemble Ikea type furniture? If so, the Ideal mOrg has a place for you. Ownership of a 3/8 inch Allen wrench required.

            2. Is David Miscavage’s Pompadour not the most manly thing you have seen in your quest to havingness manliness?

            • LongtimeLurker

              1 – I sure do! And I sure can!

              2 – Ummmm…I gotta go…I have…a thing…

          • Libertylover

            That makes sense, I know your avi’s are usually relevant to the story.
            We are getting a new Legoland in NY State to service the NYC market. They put it up north of NYC in a rural area (cheap land) so it’s closer to me than NYC. I can’t wait. I think it’s opening 2017.
            I buy all my new sets off the Lego site now as they always have a free gift and free shipping and I get lego VIP points that amount to an extra 5% but I usually wait for double points. I just got delivery of the Yellow submarine.
            I have plans to make a base out of brown Lego for Lady Liberty.
            Funny story, It’s said that no one who lives here actually goes over to the island to visit the statue and only tourists go. I read that and said to my kids lets go because in 30 years of living here we’ve never been. When we did it was indeed like the UN there with every nationality and language represented but few Americans. You can go up to the top and look out the crown but the observation deck on the torch has been closed for a long time. There’s a museum inside her at the base, I had no idea.

            • LongtimeLurker

              It’s great that you actually decided to go see her.

              Thanks for mentioning Yellow Submarine, btw. I’ve been cash-strapped for a while now, but that’s one set I need to get and I’d forgotten it was out.

              I’m jealous you have a Legoland. Pffft…stupid Southern Hemisphere.

            • Robert Eckert

              More people from South Dakota have been to the Statue of Liberty than people from New York, but then, more people from New York than from South Dakota have been to Mount Rushmore.

          • Iconoclast Six

            You need to come to San Diego! We’ve also got the mildest climate in North America, world class museums, the geekiest pop culture convention anywhere, and craft beer.

            Plus, we invented the California Burrito. What’s not to like?

            • LongtimeLurker

              It’s been on my list for a while.

              One day…

          • Princess Squishy

            You can’t out nosey grandma (actually Grandma in law but I’ve taken ownership of her as my own and she’s not getting away now). We live next door to her and she knows everything that happens at our house, and calls us when something happens that is out of the ordinary. Like my husband had to drive some stuff a couple hours away from where we work, for work, so they let him take a work vehicle, and on his way he stopped at our house and used the bathroom because he’s on a diabetes medication that makes him pee all the time, and he stopped and used the bathroom on his way back too. She called me later that day after we got home from work then I left again and she asked if I was home, and I said no I was running errands but he’s home if you need something, and she said no I don’t need anything I Just thought maybe you were sick or something was wrong because we saw a van come to your house twice today. I was like well I can’t imagine what that would’ve been we weren’t expecting anything/anybody (I didn’t know about his pit stops at that time) and she says well I just thought maybe something was wrong and they had someone drive you home in a work van because they looked like they had a gold seal on them (which the work cars all do) and I said oh well he was running work errands maybe he stopped at home while he was out. But she was very worried because she saw an unusual car at our house.
            And this is an absolutely normal conversation. She called me once several years ago because I wasn’t home and asked me what was wrong???? I told her nothing is wrong, I ran some errands after work, I’m in town bring some food to Mr. Squishy because he got sent out on a run he wasn’t allowed to stop on and get any food, so since I was in the area for therapy anyways and needed some stuff from the Wal-Mart that is 45 minutes from home I ran my errands and brought him and the others on the run some food.
            We see her looking out her side door very often when we get home from work. And she always apologizes for being so nosey and I tell her it’s okay, it doesn’t bother us at all, its not like we have anything to hide. It’s very cute.
            https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/cc3bccffd4fa95db694f94dbe5f8ee2b2de14e2aed3dde2a6f99b72896dc50e1.jpg

            • LongtimeLurker

              How did she even know about Mr Squishy’s pitstops?

              Does she have amazing hearing, or does she just sit by the window?

            • Princess Squishy

              They just spend an inordinate amount of time looking out the window. Sometimes its her and sometimes its grandpa alzheimers and she is trying to figure out what is going on based on what he is telling her. One time he told her that some woman drove up to the house in a truck and went inside, not long after we had left for work. Based on that she was asking if our friend had come by for something (we have a friend that has used our house to do laundry in the past but not lately) and I told her no I didn’t think that friend was coming over that day and I don’t know who else would’ve come over. Later I was thinking about it and I realized he saw me coming home after dropping Mr. Squishy at work, and then later leaving for my doctor appointment that I missed work for. No mystery lady, just the same person he has known as being married to his grandson for the last 10 years, and that we have lived next door to for the last 8 years.

            • LongtimeLurker

              Oh dear.

          • Douglas D. Douglas

            There is a Legoland in Carlsbad, just north of San Diego. Long, long drive for us, but I have been there several times with friends.

    • It has always seemed to me that a lot of exits from Scientology are motivated by this kind of indefensible treatment. If the CofS was a little more moderate, better organised and ethical (in the real sense of the world) it would retain more members for longer, and they would be more effective.

      This isn’t possible because Scientology itself was formulated at a time before the Internet, when the CofS could intimidate the media. Then, people could be bled dry and discarded, because there was always innocent new blood out there to be recruited. This was, in fact, the most efficient way to accumulate money.

      Now that the word is out, and recruitment has collapsed, their extreme demands and dysfunctional organisation are becoming a treat to their very existence, but they don’t know to adapt.

    • Lousy Ratatouille

      Now Michael Jackson sings in your honour. You are now allowed to hear “Sunny on a clouded day.”
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qZa5Z-rRW8Y

    • Harpoona Frittata

      Strange how life goes, huh? What can seem like a total unmitigated disaster at one point can end up being viewed as the turning point that led to your freedom from the cult!

      Would you still be in if not for this clown? Probably not; $cn is a snitch culture where your “friends” receive brownie points for betraying you, so it was bound to happen.

      In any event, a sincere “thanks so much for your unintended help in getting me out of the cult” Xmas card might be in order 😉 Sign it: “Best wishes to you for a cult-free New Year!”

    • chuckbeattyexseaorg75to03

      Yea, that is a Polo Shirt also, in the above photo…. Probably one of the items that Patron Meretorious persons get as their reward. Bet it’s a handmedown from someone who actually did donate the 1/4 million. If he’s loose with reality, I’d bet that that’s not even his earned polo shirt but a handmedown.

  • Bleuler

    Seeing as how we have an ECT unit in my hospital I just thought about an interesting controlled trial. If CCHR members are more resitant to electroconvulsive therapy (or “shocks”) than general public. Think we’ll get any unstoppable volunteers?

    • Rasha

      Extensive trials are in order, here.

    • They have ECT: Extremely Costly Twaddle.

    • LongtimeLurker

      Not only won’t they volunteer, they’ll come back with accusations that you personally use that terrible “Nazi torture device” on kidnapped kittens and dolphins.

  • Xenu’s son.

    For a limited time only, 41% discount on real t-shirts.
    UNAWARE
    UNCONSCIOUS
    UNLUCKY

  • What’sup

    Undruggable, Unshockable, Unstoppable.

    Some rufies and a taser gun should debunk that myth.

  • Sherbet

    American Apparel filed for bankruptcy this month. Get your CCHR T-shirts quickly, before they’re Unavailable.

    • LongtimeLurker

      Really? Wow.

      Thanks, Trump.

      …am I doing that right?…

      eta – Obs set me right.

      • Observer

        Just “Thanks, Trump.”

        • LongtimeLurker

          oops.

          But I did the “blaming the wrong person” part correctly, yeah?

          • Observer

            Absolutely

      • Sherbet

        I’m not sure you can blame Trump for that particular event. However, feel free to blame him for anything else that may occur in the next four years.

        • LongtimeLurker

          I’m starting early, to avoid the rush.

      • Douglas D. Douglas

        Thanks, Trump? If he had been in charge, the head of American Apparel would be promoted on the basis of his long term sexual harassment, as opposed to being removed from his post.

        • Ninara Poll

          So, you’re saying Dov Charney for Secretary of Labor? 😉

        • Ninara Poll

          So, Dov Charney for Secretary of Labor? 😉

  • Xenu’s son.

    41% discount on a beatiful real t shirt.
    UNAWARE of my UNAWARENESS

  • LongtimeLurker

    OT

    China Tells Trump That Climate Change Is Not a Hoax It Invented

    I’ve got many issues with China’s current government, but I love that they actually bothered to respond to that inane accusation. Lol.

    “Dear Orange Emperor, we invent many things, sometimes for profit, sometimes for destabilisation, sometimes just for your Western “lulz”.

    However, not only did we not invent the concept of Anthropogenic Climate Change (do not let that large word alarm you, use the Google), we were not even an industrialised nation for much of the time you people were pumping greenhouse gases into the atmosphere.

    But please go ahead Mighty Ochre Oligarch, continue to dispute thousands of your own scientists.

    China will be fine. Because our national space agency actually has funding.

    We’ll send you a postcard from Mars.

    Nǐ shūle, fèifèi,

    China”

      • LongtimeLurker

        Or if he does.

      • Libertylover

        I’m hoping he likes to be popular and adored. If Trumpy gets too much pushback on things like ending medicare, like his new hires seem to want,I’m hoping he will fold as he already seems to be doing.

    • kemist

      China only has to say one thing :

      All your rare earth metals and manufacturing capabilities are belong to us.

      Have fun cutting off our exports.

      Sincerely,

      China

      • LongtimeLurker

        ikr?

        It’s gonna be interesting.

  • Jack99

    “Back home in his native San Francisco, Scientology’s in-house rapper Chill EB attends a protest of the Dakota Access Pipeline. Is there hope for him yet?”

    Pffh! All he needs to do is hand out some copies of The Way to Happiness, and the problem is taken care of.

    • ze moo

      Stuffing Happiness pamphlets into cracked and leaking pipelines is no solution.

    • Kestrel

      He could always ask for copies of The Way to Happiness translated into the language “the Indians speak.” I’m sure they’d love to get the pamphlets in Hindi.

  • madame duran
    • LongtimeLurker
      • Me me, me me.
        Me me me me, me me.
        Meme!

      • ze moo

        Beaker is my favorite muppet.

        • LongtimeLurker

          You know…I’d never thought about it before, but I think he might be mine too.

          I do really like some of the full-body Muppets, like Sweetums, Behemoth (known more recently as Gene) and particularly Bobo the Bear (Rentro in Muppets from Space).

          …do we count Sesame Street characters as true Muppets? ‘Cause I still think The Martians, (or “Yip-Yips”) are hysterical;

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KTc3PsW5ghQ

            • NOLAGirl (Stephanie)

              ❤️❤️❤️

            • Missionary Kid

              OT. I posted something about how the French Quarter was in the late 60’s, where liquor licenses went with the addresses, so in order to have a liquor license there, one had to buy the building. Preservation Hall didn’t have a liquor license, but you could buy set-ups. Is that still true?

            • NOLAGirl (Stephanie)

              I think they brought the liquor laws up to today’s normal standards for all other bars when they changed the drinking age from 18 to 21. They still don’t serve alcohol at Preservation Hall. However, if you walk in with a drink (yes, you can still walk around with booze in the Quarter), they won’t make you throw it out. Not sure if they have to have anything in particular, license-wise, to do that but I do know someone who used to bar-tend in the Quarter so if I see him I will ask.

              ETA: I’ve never been offered a set-up at PH but I’ve never went in and asked for one either.

            • Missionary Kid

              Thanks. I made some local friends, so we would go to a bar outside the Quarter that also was the distributor for booze in the quarter and sold cheap drinks, load up with one or two drinks, then head into the quarter

            • daisy

              He has the hair structure of Donald Trump and the colour of LRH. He is singing the right song for both

            • LongtimeLurker

              Fantastic.

            • April

              <3 Beaker

            • wtf did i just watched lol

    • Great 🙂 effing great

    • Bobby Tolberto AKA TDA
  • Observer

    The HowdyCon site looks great!

    • Rasha

      Don’t it? LUV the Wall of Avatars!

      • LongtimeLurker

        ikr?

    • LongtimeLurker

      Three cheers for Kim, Dice ✓, Tony (and whoever I forgot*).

      *Observer, apparently. Duh

    • Sherbet

      Again, brava to you on your logo design. The moon/bear eating the turkey leg is priceless.

    • Kim O’Brien

      leave some comments ..ya’ll are giving me the sads

      • NOLAGirl (Stephanie)

        Muwahahahaha!!! 😀

      • NOLAGirl (Stephanie)

        P.S. I’m acting a fool today. 🙂 The site looks great! All of you did a beautiful job. ❤️

        • Kim O’Brien

          that was dice …. he was just nice enough to let me boss him around 😉

          • NOLAGirl (Stephanie)

            Awww! What a good guy. Thank you Dice! ❤️

      • joan nieman

        Good job Kim.

  • LongtimeLurker

    OT-ish

    As noseinabk pointed out here; http://tonyortega.org/2016/11/17/san-diegos-new-scientology-ideal-org-looks-like-its-ready-for-its-close-up/#comment-3006492194

    The official Farcebook page for Scientology Pennsylvania has more entheta comments than pro-Scientology ones.

    By a factor of 10.

    I thought I’d offer some selected highlights (this is what ordinary people think of you Scientology);

    – Got to see a man about some aliens and a volcano.

    – I just saw a disheveled homeless man urinating on the Church of Scientology and the impossibly old receptionist tried to shoo him and his urinating thetans away, but he had totally emptied his bladder by the time the receptionist got there.

    – He said family or money, I said money!

    – Stopping in to see if I can afford the “closeted Hollywood movie star” package.

    – I was able to make it here in good time. They say they can make my life mean something. All I have to do is give them all of my money. Off to take some tests

    • Libertylover

      That’s just sloppy. FB comments are so easily deleted if you don’t like them.
      Looks like whoever started the page isn’t checking it or blew.
      But on the other hand hahaha priceless. Thanks for the laughs.

      • LongtimeLurker

        I lolled too.

        The last Scientological comment I could find was 2014.

        Someone’s gonna get in trouble.

        • Libertylover

          If they get deleted today, we’ll know David or OSA read our comments. Probably too busy with bigger fires and the dwindling numbers. If someone left who started the page, they won’t be able to without the password, priceless!

          • LongtimeLurker

            They’ll have to go back and forth with Facebook’s help dept.

            What a waste of OT powers. Lol.

            I’ll check the page daily, see if it changes, and report back.

            • Libertylover

              Might be hard. A friend who’s mother died wanted to get access to her mothers page. She didn’t have an easy time of it, I don’t think they give those pwds out easily. I’m not sure if they did give her access actually now I think about it.

            • LongtimeLurker

              Another reason for me to hate Facebook.

              I’m sorry to hear that.

  • With San Diego’s history, I thought they were ready for their “close-up”:
    ..
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/8bf3a18a539941977074c31ae94d31ff657aaf19cd84fb2e6065addb741f9e19.jpg

    • NOLAGirl (Stephanie)

      I read the headline that way too. I was all excited. LOL

  • Observer

    Sorry, Chill, the chinworms annihilate any sense of gravitas you may be attempting to convey. They make you look dopey, not dope.

    • ze moo

      Dopey and ropey…

    • Sherbet

      He’s got that “Wherever there’s injustice, I’ll be there” look on his face, but we’re not buying it. He’s fighting the wrong enemy.

  • Chee Chalker

    Well….if no one has posted this yet:

    What David Miscavige wants to really say to San Diego:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_HNJ93HCxUA&sns=em

  • Mrs. V.

    Love the website, Kim! And the Wall of Avatars, how cool is that?

    $30 for a t-shirt from cchr. I don’t understand why scientologists feel the need to be so hostile with everything all the time. Well, except of course that lrh told them they had to be. These people could give their money to so many real human rights organizations the fact that they waste their money on a stupid t shirt that no one understands but them is beyond ridiculous.

  • Hamtaro

    I’m feeling a strong need to get one of those remaining CCHR t-shirts. Cross out the first two “UN” prefixes and change it to:
    Druggable
    Shockable
    Unstoppable

    If you like drugs (like me)…well, that’s self-explanatory. And if you’re not shocked by Scientology’s behavior…then why are you here? But unstoppable? Oh hell yeah! The modified t-shirt could proudly be worn in memoriam to Capt. Howdy and to Howdycon 2017.

    ETA: here is one of many sad truths about fighting Scientology. When I got to the checkout page at the CCHR store, I just couldn’t do it. Even though a friend (with no interest in Scn) had offered his address for shipping, I simply couldn’t enter my real (and very well known to DM and his minions) name, address and credit card number on their payment page. Which really pisses me off. Because I definitely wanted that damn shirt. I guess I’ll just have to pay a local t-shirt guy to duplicate it.

    • Kestrel

      The last thing I want to do is give CCHR money and give them an opportunity to get my contact information into their files.

      Wait. That’s two things.

    • LongtimeLurker

      Do they ship internationally Hamtaro?

      I’ll happily do it for you and you can paypal me back or whatever. It’ll cost a teeny bit extra in postage, I guess…

      I might even order one for myself, if you’ll let me steal your fantastic “Druggable, Shockable, Unstoppable” idea.

      eta – duh…I just realized of course you don’t know me IRL and I could be OSA. Sorry.

      Offer still stands though, I could have it shipped to Howdycon or something so I wouldn’t need any of your personal details.

    • flyonthewall

      there’s websites that will make a custom t-shirt for you. They have design tools and everything, no need to order from CCHR. This is where I made my “What Are Your Crimes?” shirt. They worked with me a lot and were very helpful. Little pricey but there’s no minimum quantity to have to order.

      https://www.customink.com/

    • NOLAGirl (Stephanie)

      You have the right idea. Have someone local duplicate it for you. That way you’re giving your money to a local and not CCHR and, you’ll have the shirt. ; )

    • Draco

      Buy Blank Tshirt. Get Fabric paint. Paint whatever slogan you want on it. Simples.

  • Kay (aka Nasty Lady)

    Sooooooo, they helped pass more than 150 mental health laws ? Yeah right, LOL.

    • Techie

      They shit shut down hundreds of mental hospitals too. We heard all about it in the events in the 90s. All those creepy torture chambers Shut Down (cue door slamming sound effects and animated effects by Erick Geisler). You mean to say that was a fantasy too? All my illusions are shattered.Now the former inmates are homeless in the streets and Scientology is not picking up the tab. Thanks, Legoland.

      ETA oops typo

      • Rasha

        +47 for the first sentence. ^_^

        • Techie

          Hmmm, still better edit it, hard to make sense of it through the giggles as it is.

          • Rasha

            I shall remember it fondly.

  • flyonthewall

    How are they undruggable and unshockable? Never mind the unstoppable bit bc that’s just absurd. Under the right circumstances they certainly could be drugged, I don’t know about shocked. Like if one of them committed a crime and was found to be incompetent to stand trial the judge could force them to have psychiatric treatment, including forced drugging, in order to make them competent to stand trial. So yeah

    • Kay (aka Nasty Lady)

      I don’t know of one instance in my experience where anyone has been court ordered to have ECT. (aka shock therapy) Antipsychotics, yes, in order to clear someone’s thoughts enough to stand trial.

      • flyonthewall

        If that’s what the doc thought it would take to make them competent I guess they could right? There’s prob not much they can do w/ECT that couldn’t be done w/drugs but it prob could happen, technically speaking.

        • Libertylover

          My understanding is that ECT usage was brought back because there are some cases of clinical depression that only respond to ECT. It’s only suggested when pills don’t work and everything else has failed.
          I think it’s tough because a therapeutic dose for one person is too much for another person.
          I have heard of cases where it works well but only after all else fails and it’s by choice of the patient, not forced.

          • Libertylover

            A Scientologist only sees the 1950 version of ECT and it was abused then.
            It’s different now, but you know they get lied too by their ethical church.

        • kemist

          ECT nowadays is used for depressive symptoms, not for psychosis.

          Depression per se does not make you incompetent to stand trial. Psychosis – loss of contact with reality – does.

          Someone might be forcibly given an antipsychotic, but even then I’m not so sure. I’ve seen people have to comply to treatment in order to be free, but no one forced to get treatment to be able to stand trial. In that case though they’d be detained indefinitely – which is what should be done with anyone acquitted of violent crimes with the mental incompetence defense IMO.

          • ze moo

            Those who are accused of crimes can be force ably treated in New York. If treatment does not help, then the defendant can be found unfit for trial and held until they are fit for trial.

            A judge has to sign papers every year to continue involuntary treatment. The judge has to get reports from the treatment facility on the patient and determine if they can help in their defense. That is all that is required, being able to help in their defense.

            If found not guilty because of mental illness, the defendant goes to a forensic hospital where they will get treatment, force ably if necessary. New York has forensic wards for non-sentenced people at 6 locations and one big hospital for sentenced prisoners in Utica NY.

            The NY Times had good story on such hospitals a few years ago.

            http://www.nytimes.com/2014/11/11/opinion/where-hell-is-other-patients.html?_r=0

            Working at such a hospital or ward is sure way to get assaulted.

            • kemist

              Bit different here.

              We have only one mental hospital equipped to deal with the criminally insane that I’m aware of in the whole province, which is why these people are often sent to regular jail, a profoundly inappropriate place to deal with them. Where you end up seems to depend on what lawyers and experts you can afford.

              Contrast those 2 recent cases :

              First one is a heart surgeon who killed his two young children in such a horrific way the descriptions were deemed too graphic by the media. No previous history of mental illness except “Trouble d’adaptation”, a mild psychiatric disorder meaning you’re upset about a situation, not quite a depression. He hires a psychiatry expert who mounts a whole story about how he temporarily lost his marbles and did not realize he was killing his kids. Acquitted on grounds of temporary mental incompetence, freed after spending a few months in that unique hospital.

              Second one is a guy with a long history of untreated schizophrenia. Killed his parents in a bout of psychosis. Unable to properly defend himself – most of the time, you can clearly see that no one is home in there. Mental incompetence defense rejected. So the guy ends up in regular jail, where treatment will be eminently difficult.

            • ze moo

              Every NY state prison has a area for the mental patients who didn’t get into a hospital. The state mental department has outpatient clinics at every prison.

        • LongtimeLurker

          This is aimed at drive-by readers fly, not you specifically.

          Libertylover and kemist (below) are correct about depression being basically the sole use of ECT currently.

          And at least in Australia, it’s a late (sic) resort and one the patient must consent to, after being informed of all possible negative effects.

          SIDEBAR –
          No one is ****ing being forced to
          undergo it by unethical incompetents.

          Unlike say what goes on constantly
          in Narconon facilities or what
          happened to Lisa McPherson.

          I’m so sure Scientology is lying about ECT and that the same must be true in most First World countries, that I’m not even going to bother opening another browser tab to check.
          ————————
          I know two people who were significantly helped by ETC (with arguably less side effects than medication) after nothing else could. One on The Bunker and one IRL.

          I have also read many positive patient testimonials on fora and in traditional media
          ————————
          There are promising results from Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (exactly what it sounds like), which could theoretically replace ECT.

          I’m really looking forward to what our wilfully-ignorant charlatan propagandist friends in Scientology come up with to try and stop seriously ill people from accessing that. /s
          ————————
          Sermon over.

          • flyonthewall

            Yes, I agree and I’m sorry if I came off as flippant re ECT. I was genuinely unaware that it is only used for depression. Thnx to you, Kemist and LL for that clarification!

            • LongtimeLurker

              No way. You didn’t, at all.

              I have no problem with anything you said, I just saw a chance for a soapbox on my pet subject and selfishly went for it.

              I hope you didn’t feel bad. ’cause don’t…so you didn’t know something, it’s all good fam.

    • daisy

      There is always electrocutioun , but I am a dreamer.

      • flyonthewall

        but you’re not the only one

  • Panopea Abrupta

    Christmas Gift Suggestions for DM
    Sea Org Fables by Hans Scientologist Andersen

    The Emperor’s New Clones
    a story where a child points out that the Emperor has, in fact, no clones.
    The Little Merman
    A story where the little man has no feet due to footbullets and is obliged
    to use the bottom half of a tuna.
    The Snow Queen
    Featuring a cast of 47 lemurs
    (Or how Kristie Alley was saved by Niacin and saunas)

    As the third moon slowly rose over the volcano, Dave the Droid cowered behind the bullet-proof glass.
    The razor-fencing, the hundred devoted clones programmed to defend, all were for nothing.
    The news was that the Sea Org witch had escaped and was hunting for him.
    A shiver of blue light ran down his electric spine –
    it was enough to blow a few capacitors, with their strange chemical smell.
    Leah would expose him.
    “Tick tock” went the counter.
    Tick tock

    And on my flight into Reykjavik, I saw a film for Salin –
    Iceland Aurora.
    Aurora Borealis in time lapse, glorious, beautiful, over the amazing Icelandic landscape.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/54c82afed4d10cedbb683ac8bc47ff25276801ba3a12e1a82f1070dbe6460f54.jpg

    • kemist

      Snow White

      The story of how an old man was so upset about what was in the kingdom’s files about him that he sent his wife and 7 dwarves to steal them. The dwarves and his wife are thrown in prison and he exiles himself from the kingdom.

  • chukicita

    I went back to re-read the story about Skip Young.

    After years of devoted work to Scientology, including doing things that most people don’t expect their church to ask them to do (like spying on people and losing your law enforcement job), his salvation was yanked away from him by that church’s authorities because he read an email from Debbie Cook, and decided to look for himself and read a few books.

    Because Scientology can’t stand up to transparency and criticism, he has lost his daughters.

    Skip was doing exactly what his religion pretends to counsel – look for yourself. But only, evidently, if you look where they are pointing.

    • since then, he has read a lot of entheta – skipyoung.net

    • LongtimeLurker

      Thanks for the synopsis, chukicita.

    • MarcabExpat

      That last point is beautifully pot and would juuuust fit nicely on a poster. Or t-shirt.

    • Harpoona Frittata

      I followed the embedded link and read Tony’s blog post on Skip’s tawdry past too. I was left with mixed emotions: On the one hand, no one deserves to be the victim of the cherch’s heinous policy of coerced disconnection; but on the other, Skip was the witting instrument of some true evil over a very long period of time that’s now very predictably turned on him and bit him in the ass, just as it did to many, many others. But unlike the many others who’ve been mistreated and abused by the cherch in this way, Skip was deeply involved with the dirtiest of dirty tricksters who’d found refuge in the David Morse & Associates group after the Snow White debacle and effectively became the OSA’s out-sourced intelligence arm. To me, the “Good German” defense ( see here for def. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Good%20German ) can never exonerate folks from their culpability in truly heinous acts.

      Much of $cn’s ability to engage in massive human rights abuses with impunity stems directly from the cherch’s success in gaining federal tax exempt status as a charitable religious organization; which they gained not because they deserve it, but by effectively waging a covert war on the IRS and bludgeoning that formidable federal agency into submission. Skip’s involvement with the campaign of harassment, coercion, bogus lawsuits and possible blackmail that turned the tide in the cherch’s battle with the IRS is part of a book-length story that truly needs to be told in full detail because it’s just that pivotal. It’s also one that dovetails exactly with the one that Marty Rathbun could tell as the only $cn insider besides lil davey who was privy to everything the cherch was up doing in order to bend the IRS to their malign purpose throughout that period.

      Instead of trying to minimize his responsibility and deflect his culpability in that massive campaign, I’d much prefer to see Skip actually make amends for his crimes by teaming up with some talented and dogged investigative journalists (hint, hint) to get to the bottom of this key turning point in the cherch’s post-Elron recovery and the juice it gave to lil davey the savage’s reign of terror. $cn was on the ropes and on the hook for hundreds of millions in back taxes owed at the time Elron went into deep hiding, but through a campaign of fair gaming the IRS they very regrettably squirmed out of being held to account for it. That very unfortunate decision directly resulted in the corporately re-organized cherch, under lil davey’s malign leadership, getting a second life that’s resulted in thousands of lives harmed and families being torn apart.

      The moral of this story is that the cherch, under lil davey the savage’s sadistic and brutal control, cares nothing about past loyalty, service and commitment; it only cares about money and keeping its many, many crimes and human rights abuses from being exposed by whatever means it feels are necessary. Expecting to receive a just and fair hearing from it is like expecting hyenas to refrain from eating their young…it ain’t never gonna happen!

  • dungeon master

    I think that T-shirt design, particularly the Unshockable part, is iincredibly insensitive to the Moxon’s, whose daughter was electricuted while working at Big Blue. Do these people not know their own history? (Duh. Silly question. Of course they don’t.)

    • (((dagobarbz)))

      I need one of those “Electric Squirrel” shirts from Gold Base megaraid.

  • Tony Ortega

    UPDATE added to the post. Official flier clinches it — San Diego Ideal Org coming soon.

    • Techie

      They say they are going to live stream the opening. Or something. Unlikely to really be a live stream, everything they put out that has Dave in it is edited to the max to make him look flawless. From Mike Rinder’s blog today http://i1.wp.com/www.mikerindersblog.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Screenshot-373.png?w=867

    • Missionary Kid

      IIRC, someone earlier posted a flier that the ideal org opening was to be this Saturday, the 19th. I don’t recall the time.

      I believe that they’ll try to close off 4th Avenue for the opening. Saturdays are usually pretty dead in that part of town, and foot traffic is almost always dead all the time for that location. 4th Avenue, though, is a busy street for auto traffic during the rest of the work week. On Sundays, there’s several large churches that I would imagine take up much of the on street parking, so a Saturday would be (pardon the use of the word) ideal.

      Someone can check on street closings in San Diego. That will tell the story.

      Supposedly, because the building was originally built over a parking lot, and all that parking was lost, the city required them to provide parking, so they bought a parking structure to replace the lost spaces. At least that was what I was told about a year ago when I visited the org. I didn’t believe the big plans that I was told about the remodel. Oh, me, of little faith to disbelieve a $cientologist.

      The thing about the temporary location that cracked me up is that it is located about 100′ from the Porn Depot.

      • Porn Depot ?!? typical scianotology

        • Missionary Kid

          Google Earth street view doesn’t show it, because it’s not a current scanning of Kurtz street, which is a one way street. Driving up it, the current location of the org is on the left, and just ahead, the Porn Depot is on the right.

          • my old org was always attached to a porn shop somehow

      • grundoon

        No wonder they chose that location.

        • Missionary Kid

          I think that one would probably learn more about life at the porn depot.

  • (((dagobarbz)))

    San Diego: anyone wanna play? Contact me if you can find me…

    • Missionary Kid

      Finally, your name makes sense to me.

      • (((dagobarbz)))

        cuz I don’t look Italian? 😀

        • Missionary Kid

          For some reason, I didn’t even think of dago, but was trying to figure out how “dog” fit in that. Brain fart. 😛

        • LongtimeLurker

          HOW DOES AN ITALIAN LOOK?!?!

          • (((dagobarbz)))

            With his eyes, duh.

            • LongtimeLurker

              lol

  • Libertylover

    OT but bugging me
    When the primaries were in full swing, we had all the candidates visit Syracuse. Even Cruz and Kasich came.
    I went to see them all (Bernie was the best) and had to sign up.
    I never realized I would get 3 emails a day from Trump. Surprisingly got none from Hillary and I thought she was better organised?
    Trump’s still emailing with sales, one last week for a limited edition victory shirt and today, a sale on hats and shirts, mugs etc.
    Anyway what’s bothering me is that they have spelling mistakes? I realize with my affliction, that my punctuation is terrible, but spelling mistakes when a spell checker is so easy to use?
    Doesn’t bode well that his staff can’t use spell check does it? Perhaps it’s the least to worry about but anyway.

    • Missionary Kid

      Lousy spelling can either be a mark of a lack of education, a mental blind spot (a friend of mine has the problem as the result of a serious accident), disorganization, or sloppiness.

      • Bobby Tolberto AKA TDA

        JFK was notoriously a lousy speller. “Profiles in Courage” was in the main written by Ted Sorenson, which was never admitted by the family for much of the latter’ life.

    • kemist

      But, but but, he chooses the best people. Good advisers.

      At least that’s what I’ve been told.

      • Libertylover

        Let’s be honest, he never expected to win did he really?
        Trump University trial postponed, it’s rigged etc.
        Today I see a story “Donald Trump Is Finding It Hard To Field A Foreign Policy Team Without A Foreign Policy”
        Huff post has surrogates praising the Japanese internment camps during WW2?
        “Trump surrogates are already citing Japanese internment camps from WW II as “precedent” for Muslim registry.”
        Ironic because major supporter, Alex Jones, talks about the Feds setting up FEMA camps weekly to imprison everyone.
        Trump was on his show before. Jones claims he called him last week and said thanks and promised to come on again soon.
        I hope he does go on again because it won’t help his credibility one bit with everyone else but the Infowars fans.
        I’ve said it before that conspiracy theories are a guilty pleasure of mine, but it wasn’t funny any more, after I would see Trump literally repeat what Jones said a week later. That scared me because I always considered it loony fringe stuff.
        Alex Jones IMO is the conspiracy If he didn’t exist some powerful person would invent him.
        He mixes facts with BS that leads people away from the real source of the problem into un-provable theories that immobilizes people and keeps them ignorant.
        His site makes many just feel hopeless and powerless, there’s no actionable “INFO.”
        Recently he began an incessant drum beat for Trump is the saviour and the solution to every problem.
        He made a ton off the “Hillary for Prison” shirts. but I think Trump paid him, no proof but I really do think he did.

        • LongtimeLurker

          “precedent”

          Like past actions somehow make everything okay.

          “Hitler cites dinosaur-killing asteroid as precedent for genocide.”

          • Elegant Mess

            Yeah, forget that in 1988, the President issued an apology & reparations to the victims of internment. We as a nation fully acknowledged that E.O. 9066 was unconstitutional. Now alt-right pundits are citing it as “precedence”? What’s next?
            I need a hug.

    • ze moo

      Mass emails are usually typed and then checked by some sort of stuporvisor. This stuporvisor either couldn’t spell themselves or just didn’t care enough to check it. Then the message is run against the mailing list and sent on its merry way.

      Some email programs allow you to bounce those emails back with ‘user does not exist’ or other message.

      Maybe Trumpy contracted with the CO$ for email solicitations? He needs money to pay for the Inauguration and all those campaign expenses he ‘loaned’ the cause.

  • Free Minds, Free Hearts

    Sorry CCHR, I’d rather have one of Phil and Willie Jones’s Call Me T-shirts. And they are only $20!! http://stopscientologydisconnection.com/t-shirts/

  • Doug Parent

    The San Diego Church of Scientology is planning on their grand re-opening this saturday but they will be doing so without MANY of their former public and staff. Two former mission holders (and popular Scientologists) are among many San Diegans who have been declared suppressive in the last ten years alone. I will stand among those who will be raising a single finger salute in your direction San Diego Org. Puppets of a corrupt system that has openly decimated Scientology of whatever heart it ever had.

    • Missionary Kid

      Do you know if they’re going to close off 4th Avenue for the opening?

      • Doug Parent

        that would be my guess along with “tree tech” in use as well.

  • Rasha

    OMX!! I finally got a chance to look at the 2016 Scientology Holiday Catalog!!! On the envelope it came in, I read, “New Releases You Won’t Believe!“, so I tore it open and the first item was an introductory card, with “SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT: A very special, mind-blowing, new announcement. You won’t believe it until you see it!

    A NEW announcement?? Oboyoboyoboy……

    Then I had to go straight to the catalog. The intro card promised “so much havingness for everyone on your list this season”, so I figure, mah shoppin’ is DUN, babeh!!!!!

    ummm… Table of contents… here… Page 6 – “A Spectacular New Announcement Just in time for the holidays” SQUEEEE!!!! Okay, okay….. page six… They’re not numbered – but wait, here’s page 12, so I’ll work backwards… seems they count the cover as page 1….. huh… ANYHOO……

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/46c7db4f0caaad23aea24d092d92ee7d51893d737cafa36d67c942c814d90dda.jpg

    …oh. Um, okay. Well, the facing page has the Christmas tree, and reads “Perfection is Absolute” in huge letters, so let’s turn the page….

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/e9a1f337a8dede407a8eb4b8aa12ba5c6302a4f03a7c5713462c094df7e698da.jpg

    ….HOLY FRICKEN XENU!!!…. are you KIDDING? I’m buying one of EACH for EVERYONE!!! *rolls on bed, kicking feet in the air* Yessssssssss!!!!!!

    • i’m speechless

      • Rasha

        Pshaw. You’d do the same for me.

        • well now i have this conflicting picture of you in my head… kicking feet in the air?
          eta: i just got up from the floor playing with Meme, i almost never made it!

    • LongtimeLurker

      This is going to sound like a joke, but it’s not a joke.

      …the Scientology Holiday Catalog…

      is
      a
      real
      thing

      ??

      When you mentioned it previously, I was 47x 100% sure you were joking.

      I’m stunned.

      Do other churches do this?

      So…other than e-meters what the hell else could they possibly be offering? Can you get auditing gift vouchers?

      This is almost the most insane thing I’ve heard this week

      • Rasha
        • what is that button? Lo Med? Santa would never approve

          • Draco

            LO? What? They couldn’t spring for the W?
            I bet below the MED button there is another labeled HI

        • LongtimeLurker

          Really? Amazing.

          But not the Clear bracelet, right?

          I mean, surely you have to be awarded that?

          • I suspect you are ‘awarded’ the right to wear one, but you still have to buy it (from the only official supplier, at a huge mark-up, of course).

            • LongtimeLurker

              So I couldn’t just buy one, right? I’d have to show my certificate or something, surely?

            • MarcabExpat

              Yeah it’s like ordering Mormon underwear, you have to show your eligibility to buy.

            • LongtimeLurker

              lol

            • MarcabExpat

              It is funny but it’s also TRUE

          • Rasha

            Separate mini-catalog for that.

      • Princess Squishy

        My church (SDA) sells boxes of oranges and other citrus fruit in the winter time. But I’ve never seen any holiday catalog. I love oranges when I have teeth.

    • kemist

      I’m jelly here.

      How did you get this ? Will you be harassed with phone calls from hungry regges all your life ?

      • Rasha

        Nah, I got the calls to stop, but I get occasional mailings. It’s worth it just for the Holiday Catalog.

        • LongtimeLurker

          I agree.

          I would suck it up just to get that.

        • MarcabExpat

          Please, PLEASE scan the whole thing and send it to Tony so he can regale us with commentary on the whole thing. Pretty please?

          • Rasha

            I told Tony I should have pinged him first, so I’ll quit putting up images here. Now I just need to get access to a scanner…. This stuff is great.

            • MarcabExpat

              Yeah it will definitely qualify as early Bunker Christmas if we get to see all that 🙂

    • Elizabeth Lavet

      What in the world does “Perfection is Absolute” really mean. Another hollow saying about success in Scientology that cannot be pinned down and is meaningless. Does this hint, without actually saying it, that one can become perfect through the use of Scientology and that this is absolutely true?. Can anyone be sued over “Perfection is Absolute”? Absolute what, absolute crap. EDIT: did a word check on Absolute, they are probably saying their products are unwaveringly perfect, total perfection. Hummm, kind of an odd way to say it, sounds more like a scientology goal than a product description. But then what do I know. I would like to see someone try to get their money back if they thought anything they bought was less than perfect, based on “Perfection is Absolute”. Tight fisted money grabbing Scientology would never let go.

      • Harpoona Frittata

        “From the Front Porch of your Eternity, it’s crystal clear that in this Golden Age of all Golden Ages, Perfection is Absolute and your immortality assured…so why delay, shop now and enjoy the season’s glad tidings!”

        $cn advertising is never meaningless, Elizabeth; it’s always, always about sucking your last dollar (and all your credit worthiness too) out of you, then holding your family hostage while demanding more!

      • LongtimeLurker

        You make a great point.

        Given that one of the definitions of perfect is in fact;

        “2. absolute; complete”

        …they’re effectively saying the equivalent of “taller is higher” or “fast is quickness”.

        Idiots. Seriously.

    • Douglas D. Douglas

      The one on the left looks like Darth Vader with a shiner.

    • Douglas D. Douglas

      Can you show us the cover of this marvel? Pretty please…?

      • Rasha

        see below… ^_^

        • Douglas D. Douglas

          There it is.

          Shiny!

    • Jimmy3

      I need to havingness all both of them.

      • flyonthewall

        hey what was the K3 guy yesterday about?

        • Jimmy3

          I have no idea who that was or what it was about. But I also don’t care.

          • flyonthewall

            ok then, sorry. Just wondering

            • Jimmy3

              No need to be sorry, buddy. The important thing is we don’t stop being druggable and shockable.

          • Robert Eckert

            They’ll troll you when you try to post a comment
            They’ll troll you with the grief they like to foment
            They’ll troll you on the blog that feels like home
            They’ll troll you on the blog that’s yours alone
            Oh I would not feel it’s gotten old
            Everybody must get trolled!
            — Rainy Day Internet Rule #34

        • LongtimeLurker

          Was Jimmy being hassled?

          fuckers

          • Jimmy3

            Nah, just someone posted as Kimmy3 with a monkey avatar. They weren’t hassling me tho. I thought it was kinda funny.

            • LongtimeLurker

              Oh. s’okay then.

              Hey, if it was really a chick, you two could hook up.

              You’d be kinda like fly and flylady.

            • flyonthewall

              he should totally go for it

            • LongtimeLurker

              What’s the worst that could happen, hooking up with a stranger you met in the comments of a site that’s constantly watched by a corrupt Church full of insane people?

            • flyonthewall

              You could have fun like we did at Howdycon? Only one person mysteriously disappeared and was never heard from again but we still had a good time

            • do my downvotes hurt your upvote total? jus’ wondering.

            • flyonthewall

              Nope. I am impervious to downvotes

            • Jimmy gets no new girlfriends yet. Maybe in ten years or so — but not yet. I’m not ready to handle that.

            • flyonthewall

              my girls think he’s flylady’s boyfriend. They love to tell her that all the time, never gets old…for them anyway.

            • flylady can have him (cuz she’s married) but other than that — no.
              edit: at least till I get a new bf — then he can do whatever he wants XD

            • flyonthewall

              *high five*

    • Harpoona Frittata

      LFBDs for days!!! Just seeing all that $cn swag has got me all wet and hard at the same time…

      Take THAT, Xenu…this Xmas we’re coming for you and all those super sticky BTs too!!!

      Only trouble is, after being crush regged to within an inch of my life and maxing out my CCs to achieve Meritorious Victimus Maximus status we’re, umm, just a little short this holiday season here at Casa Frittata *hangs head sheepishly, momentarily overcome by MIPs of better days*

    • Draco

      Palm slaps face.

      You are so funny! I was getting all excited right along with you.
      I wonder how many of each of those each org will be forced to, I mean want to buy. Can you imagine the excitement under all those scilon xmas trees around the world?

    • Ninara Poll

      So you don’t have one of these installed with your mailbox?

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SaFoLMFqkWQ

      • daisy

        That is the funniest thing I have seen in months,

    • Juicer77

      Rolling. Just rolling! XD

    • Ella Raitch

      MEST, MEST and more MEST
      There’s MEST for you, and MEST for you….

  • Lousy Ratatouille

    Today’s chapter of Deconstructing Scientology is the beßt so far!

  • Mighty Korgo of Teegeeack

    Down in Denver, Down in Denver, All I Did Was Die… Jack Kerouac said that in “On the Road”. Had he been a Scientologist like his pal William S. Burroughs he might have added, “…and then returned to life with all my memories intact after I found a suitable meat body”.

  • Lousy Ratatouille

    Today I learned for the first time that independent scientologists are convinced that official Scientology was taken/ has been taken over by the Marcabians. It think it was taken over by David Miscavige.
    Scientology was no good in 1952 and it will never be.

    • Harpoona Frittata

      Did you just get the news? My sources – located deep in the upper echelons of the only real and true beating heart of Scn (see here for more info, plus an actual pic of what Marcabian’s hands look like https://milestonetwo.wordpress.com/ ) – informed me of the Marcabian take-over quite some time back.

      Since I’m no longer a $cilon in good standing in any $cn organization, finding out what their plans are to counteract this Marcabian Invader Force’s subversion of $cn has been really tough. I’m sure that being close-mouthed about all that is absolutely necessary, knowing the cherch’s penchant for espionage and filthy trickery, but there is definite potential for an alliance with folks in The Bunker and on other anti-$cn boards to take DM down, whether he’s an actual Marcabian or not!

      So, to the Milestone 2 crowd, and any other indie groups out there, we feel your pain and want to see lil davey the savage go down and the corporate cherch undergo fundamental reform as much as you do. The question of whether or not a reformed CoS could survive after the Super SP I/C is sent packing and every one of the cherch’s heinous policies of Fair Game, disconnection and human rights abuses are discontinued is one that is completely open to debate, imo. But let’s have that discussion together AFTER those first first fundamental steps towards reform are accomplished!

    • Draco

      Marcab, CIA, Illuminati, DM is a plant…yada yada yada. They think in conspiracy theories because they think scn is SOOOO important.

    • MarcabExpat

      Lemme tell you, if it’d been us that took ’em over, they’d all be a helluva lot better off now. We know how to treat our minions, and we tolerate ’em all, even the air-breathing ones. God I miss Marcab *hic*

      • LongtimeLurker

        It’s changed a lot. You got out at the right time.

        • MarcabExpat

          Oh, I know I did the right thing after we elected that purple-faced asshat, but I really took a bath on the real estate. I just didn’t have the leverage, y’know?

    • chukicita

      DM’s a Marcabian?!?!?!

      • LongtimeLurker

        ISWYDT
        = )

  • Phil Jones

    I feel for Skip, not even knowing who his daughter married, or when. Our daughter (who is in the Sea Org) got married last year and we also weren’t told. I don’t even know the date. I hope he can reconnect with his daughters soon. This Scientology disconnection abuse needs to end.

    • Douglas D. Douglas

      At least you can look at photos of your son-in-law on the internet:

      (refresh)

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/30b5e409d8f5dca2f031b6f0384dcd91bed3a1fd2e67cf600e2f6fcd8514bcae.jpg

      • Phil Jones

        He’s not as tall as I thought he’d be.

      • daisy

        No need to point a gun, I am going to the deportation line, Mr Trump

        • just tell them you want to go back to the Virgin island or some other excotic place

        • Princess Squishy

          my husband and I were having a totally inappropriate conversation about how Trump is going to use one of those paint sample cards to judge who he’s going to be president for and who is going to be deported: “You’re safe if you’re above this line…” I told him he better hope they weren’t doing a skin check in the summertime because he’s like 1/4 Italian and in the summer and when he gets tan he gets kinda dark. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/87c6416a4d990155c84ad769b899c797548067a65dd818c866535314bddd6cb2.jpg

          • All jokes are grounded in reality. It happened in S. Africa and other places — why not here?

            • Princess Squishy

              exactly that’s how the joke starts. I hope it doesn’t happen here but you wouldn’t be joking if there wasn’t some inkling that that’s what Trump or at least many of his supporters want. Not really a joking matter but his family are masters at terrible/hysterical jokes

          • LongtimeLurker

            That is terrible / hysterical.

            • Princess Squishy

              I’ve got another terriblehysterical for you: one day we were driving home from work and we went the long way to go somewhere and then for some reason we got on these back roads to attempt to go back home via these back roads, and we got 100% lost. We were driving in really backwoods country areas (in my county you don’t have to go far) and we were joking around but he kept jokingly blaming being lost on me, even though he is the one that chose which way to turn, and I kept telling him we weren’t really lost because eventually we would come to one of the main roads we know. But he keeps telling me over and over again that this is my fault that I got us lost, as a joke, so I finally told him that we were in KKK country (we really were, they have a bar/clubhouse thing in the area that they have named something with 3 words that they spell beginning with K’s) and that I was going to hand him over to the KKK and tell them that he was some shade of brown so I’m sure they hate him. I told him he might pass for Mexican, at least enough for these guys.

            • LongtimeLurker

              They have bars / clubhouses?

              That’s terrifying.

              I would never leave the cities.

            • Princess Squishy

              Yeah they do. They also own the pawn shop in town (gave it the same 3k spelled names) and at least once they came to the town square all dressed up and handed out flyers apt what they stand for and why they were started. I missed that though I was at home.

      • ze moo

        How does he type his emails with those claws?

        • they don’t have WiFi

        • (((dagobarbz)))

          Carefully.

      • he really need to use a shaver more often

      • (((dagobarbz)))

        This looks like the answer to the question, “What if Terl screwed a Wookie?”

    • Juicer77

      Sid I think of you and Willie every time I talk to my family across the sea. Keep on keepin’ on. It will happen.

  • LongtimeLurker

    That San Diego flyer…

    WHAT?!

    No typos / misspellings?!?!

    I need the fainting couch.

    I mean…sure there’s still some weird layout issues because of the commitment to centred text, and certainly one could argue they went a bit overboard (HA!) on the Capitalisation Near the End, but I think this is a first.

    Well done Scientology!

    …and possibly OSA for sending out a memo after they saw us mocking previous examples of ineptitude here in The Bunker.

    • Rasha

      Shift that end angle bracket, there buddeh! Actually, I only use them for italics and bold, and parentheses for other stuff… Still, I’ve done it a lot.

      …nevermind…. ^_^

      • LongtimeLurker

        I know, that was crazy.

        I’ve never seen it before.

        • Rasha

          When you use angle brackets, Disqus tries to interpret everything inside as some sort of formatting tag. I guess it’s like pseudo-XML-type stuff. I use stars and perens for asides, now.

  • flyonthewall

    Here’s a song Chill made about DAP. His beats and rhymes are wiggity whack ya’ll but that goes w/o saying I guess. It’s just very simple and childish. Also the setting is some kind of grubby looking broken down brush, it looks a mess. However, Dave Pomerantz commented on it, so that’s kinda neat.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=snBQ9xttJVo

    • LongtimeLurker

      Wait…Dap, like “giving Dap”?

      Also…I’m not gonna listen to that. Cause screw Chill.

      How did Pomerantz get access to a computer?

      • flyonthewall

        DAP = Dakota Access Pipeline.

        It’s only got like 300 views so *shrug* I don’t think that watching it on another site gives it views, not sure on that. Just throwing it out there since it’s on topic. I like to sometimes make on topic posts bc it throws people off

        • LongtimeLurker

          Oh. duh

          I was thinking – “Dap – a friendly gesture of greeting, agreement, or solidarity between two people that has become popular in western cultures, particularly since the 1970s, originating from African American communities.”

          …and because the song title was “They Don’t Care About Us” I got really confused.

          Nah…I’ll totally listen to it.

          I was just tryna send bad vibes to Chill.

          • flyonthewall

            I consider myself African American even though I obviously am not and I have never heard of dap in that context. Very peculiar.

            • LongtimeLurker

              I’m really white…

              How did I know about it?

              What the hell is going on?

            • flyonthewall
            • chukicita

              *facepalm*

            • LongtimeLurker

              He started us on this path…

            • chukicita

              There’s a song by Patty Larkin called “I’m White.”

              I don’t have time to search for a link at the moment, but just pretend I posted it here, ‘k?

            • LongtimeLurker

              k.

              I’ll go look.

            • chukicita

              *double facepalm*

            • flyonthewall

              stop hitting yourself!

            • chukicita

              I’m just giving daps to my face.

    • chukicita

      First words: “this whole situation has been esculated” [sic]

      Esculated? Smh.

      As someone who has been watching this whole DAP thing for more than a year now, chili bean’s roadside contribution only shows that he has limited understanding of the conflict or the movement, other than a soundbite from an on-site video that he uncomfortably makes into a refrain.

      The song does not inform or educate, it simply tries to enrage and divide, provides no call for peace (which is paramount to those who are actually on the front lines), and — did he call Standing Rock a “village?”

      • flyonthewall

        Based on his Twitter feed activity he’s only been paying attn since early Nov so it makes sense that his understanding lacks any depth

      • NOLAGirl (Stephanie)

        Esculated? LOL

        Biggie and Tupac both just rolled over.

        • chukicita

          I think they’d each grab a chin worm to beat him with.

          • NOLAGirl (Stephanie)

            I wouldn’t be opposed to this. 😀

  • Ninara Poll

    “Undruggable, Unshockable, Unstoppable?” OMFG THEY’RE ZOMBIES RUN!!!

    • kemist

      If they’re zombies, they’re stoppable, but not with drugs or shocks.

      You just need to doubletap.

    • (((dagobarbz)))

      You can always stop zombies by decapitating them. Not recommended in the real world!

  • Kim O’Brien

    anyone who says i am undruggable …… is a fucking liar

    • flyonthewall

      i saw you get dragged w/my own eyes so I know it’s a lie

    • daisy

      Me neither Kim ,I always go kicking and screaming.

    • Lily Tomlin on “natural childbirth”:
      “What a time to go OFF drugs.”

  • Jgg2012

    Doesn’t San Diego already have an org?

    • kemist

      Maybe.

      But was it Ideal ?

      Everyone knows everything is better when it’s Ideal and shit. Ron COB said so.

    • kemist

      Maybe.

      But was it Ideal ?

      Everyone knows everything is better when it’s Ideal and shit. Ron COB said so.

      • Jgg2012

        Next, they will tear down the ideal orgs and come up with “super ideal” orgs.

    • Tony Ortega

      That’s the idea of the Ideal Org program. They replace already existing facilities.

      • Phil Jones

        Interesting that they don’t call it an Ideal Org. Maybe they are just going to start renovating Orgs and using the old buildings.

        • That’s the plan for the Toronto org, except that it’s a complete teardown to the floors and frame. Expensive, slow, and no permit yet.

          • Phil Jones

            They just have to raise another $5 million likely. I was told that the $5 million they previously raised was taken by Int for Google Ads during an ’emergency’ PR situation.

        • Plymouth Ideal Org (in the UK) seems to have recently made a very little progress. However, I strongly suspect that’s just to provide a some hope, to keep the money coming in https://scicrit.wordpress.com/2016/11/06/plymouth-ideal-org-fantasies-and-lies/

          How much of that money will eventually be spent on the project, and how much is being quietly diverted to keep the modest existing org going (so that it can provide cash to go ‘uplines’) is an interesting question.

          Every time they open one of these places, it becomes a financial liability, which will struggle to pay its own running costs. However, as long as enough money is being raised for ‘the next big thing’ that some can be diverted without raising a stink, the con remains viable.

          We will know when it is starting to flag when the CofS start to sell property to sustain their income. .

  • Phil Jones

    San Diego Scientology Org Opening, The Movie

    Starring: David Miscavige as Norma Desmond

    Location: Sunset Boulevard, San Diego

    Writer: Cecil B. Sherman

    • flyonthewall

      is the mummified monkey corpse role already taken? I’d like to try out if not

      • daisy

        I think the Trump boys have filled all those roles

        • LongtimeLurker
          • Harpoona Frittata

            Ahh, there they are…tRumpf’s very own Hitler Youth, gazing into the Father Land.

            • LongtimeLurker

              “One day, all this will all be ours.”

              “Uhhh…I smell pennies.”

            • daisy

              Seriously they do not even look alive , they look like the first dead bodies I ever saw.

            • LongtimeLurker

              …you’ve lived a life Daisy, you’ve lived a life.

              There may actually be something wrong with the one on the left.

              Like…for seriously.

          • Observer

            Those are two books you can tell by their greasy covers.

      • Phil Jones

        Absolutely! That part has not been cast yet. They’ve been preserving this part just for you. As soon as this role of the monkey mummy is filled then that’s a wrap on the casting.

        • flyonthewall

          Hope I make the final cut!

          • Phil Jones

            I’m sure you will. And once is all said and done we can do a post-mortem on the situation.

            • flyonthewall

              I can’t wait! If it’s a success, I will be immortalized in film and the curse of anonymity will be lifted forever.

    • ze moo

      Once again, Bob Dobbs leads the way!

  • LongtimeLurker

    …psssst…

    …psssst…

    Did you click the heart?


    http://bestanimations.com/Signs&Shapes/Hearts/heart-fire-animation18.gif

    • Juicer77

      Yes, sir.

      • LongtimeLurker

        You’re my favorite gumball robot.

        • Juicer77

          Xoxo

  • nottrue
  • Juicer77

    Another Grand Opening…. *yawn*. I guess if the Scilons continue to believe Mismanage’s “expansion” charade, he can keep sucking in the money.
    I hope Skip gets reunited with his daughters in the near future. Sigh.
    Speaking of reunions, I got a chance to visit a friend recently in London https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ffd70aff0c506267bc187417286784f8d8706119c0c6a0b6405dcef18dfc1dac.jpg and he let me take this cool pic. 🙂 Was good to see him again. F5 eta: sideways,*×÷£*÷@ Disqus

  • Lousy Ratatouille

    I don’t know what exactly is supposed to have happened in San Diego, but I think $cientology has been jacking up the fundraising target as high as possible for the Ideal Org.
    Miscavige’s hairstylist will jack up his hair for the occasion, I’m sure.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xuvsoZLE3WE

  • Mockingbird

    OT, in totalitarian regime news US Uncut reports a Republican Washington lawmaker proposes making protests against Trump illegal. A Trump representative has also supported extreme monitoring of Muslims and requiring them to submit to a registry . He said it has legal precedent in the Japanese internment camps used in the US in World War II. That’s a human rights abuse.

    So banning protests, arresting protesters and a Muslim registry with internment camps as the legal and moral justification is already here, before he even seized power.

    It will only get worse.

    • Libertylover

      I know you’re concerned, I am too, but Trump’s not going to be a dictator. The Senate can block him on a lot of things. If he doesn’t compromise, they will impeach him. There’s plenty to go after him for.
      Rumor is he didn’t release his taxes because he owes millions to Russian and Chinese banks and he’s setting himself up for a fall by having his kids run his business. Trump wants to be loved and adored and likely won’t peruse unpopular ideas. He needs to get rid of the crazies around him. He changes his mind on a whim so he’s no ideologue with an agenda. Pense might be worse.
      Not saying having a 12 year old for President isn’t terrifying, but I don’t think it’s going to be as terrible as you fear, hopefully.

      • Juicer77

        At the very least, we as citizens can breathe deep and face this with our wits intact. Panicking does no one any good. We are in for a very long 4 years of watchdogging this cretin. But we are up to it. I am certain of it.

      • Mockingbird

        I don’t believe the Senate will dare to stop him. They already compromised to vote for him or endorse him He can do indefinite detention and torture under current law. He needs nothing for that.

        He will appoint the most far right judges possible at every level including the supreme court. He will appoint the most far right heads of departments and they will be obedient to him.

        The Senate cannot impeach him without a lot of support and he won’t let it happen. He will give republicans enough to keep them happy while destroying his scapegoats. All he needs is to find a couple Latino criminals out of millions of people. He will do the very worst things he has said.

        He wants a pure white America. He hasn’t dared to be openly antisemitic because he knew that would have gotten even republicans to kick him out. But he tweaked Nazism and is starting with Muslims, immigrants and the most vulnerable.
        He promised to open up libel laws .

        He has already complained about protesters. He IS an ideologue. President Barack Obama is either fooled, lying or using wishful thinking.

        I believe racism is one of the consistent traits Trump has displayed for decades. He also has spoken of his good genes openly many times and believes in a theory of good stock coming from certain lines. Like with breeding horses.

        • JJ

          Thinking what maybe have Muslims wear some sort of insignia on their clothing for easier identification, that’s not too…unconstitutional is it. No. Maybe like a silver crescent moon maybe…?
          I know it sounds stupid but my I Ching literally said, “just because the bad men go away, does not mean they cannot-or will not-return.” Is the calm between the storms over? Are people that scared, that selfish, that stupid? Or as Marcus Aurelius wrote, in a nutshell, ‘Don’t be surprised when people do stupid crap… people do stupid crap…’ Somehow, at expelling millions of people, privatizing health care and a mentally unbalanced narcissist having access to nuclear weapons, it gets harder to just blow off…

          I can almost make sense of ALL OF IT but for one thing. The open, unrepentant lying! And I don’t mean just Trump. The people who said (ala Cruz) the fiend insulted my family, he’s a wastrel, a demon, I shall never support him… And now, he has “had good talks with him and is looking forward to working with him.” I know you need to compromise in Washington, but is there any line! ANY!!? Does anyone have values that are not negotiable!?

          • Mockingbird

            Yes. The obedience to anyone that is a bully with an R next to their name is unconscionable. These people are going to look very bad in history if anyone is left to write it. Even if Trump and his white supremacists control the nation for a century video of his cruelty and pathological lying will survive. He cannot escape the truth.

      • Mockingbird

        I am going to have to dig but I have found Trump considtentently uses the same propaganda techniques as Hitler. Godwin can go fuck himself. An actual white supremacist is president and a very, very ambitious one.

  • Lousy Ratatouille
  • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

    The San Diego Ideal Org will open just as soon as we optimize the settings on COB’s new Regging Machine. As you can see from this astonishing new device, if you just relax and cooperate it doesn’t hurt as much.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/b834949a82606ecfb1d7f75ab813674dfb5afe4840d2f0c6f3d5c79a19c44c7c.png

    • Juicer77

      I’ve seen kinder things in my Gyn’s hands at the other end of a paper gown.

      • Sherbet

        I think it was a height-stretching machine, but, since it didn’t work on cob, it’s been repurposed into a, well, heck, what IS that thing??

    • LongtimeLurker

      Okay, I understand that it goes up and down, but I just need to know…

      …are my pants undone so that…um…Little Lurker…gets smashed between the two halves every time it comes back down?

      I’d just like to be clear on this.

    • COB had better watch out: Dr. Strabismus of Utrecht (on whom be peace) is consulting lawyers over infringements on his ‘Utrechto-Stretch Mk. VI’ Personal Knee-Straightener & Trouser-Press…

      • I can never see or hear the words “Trouser Press” without the Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band coming to mind.
        So, thank you.
        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xoWs8ER6PJo

      • Sherbet

        I’m not sure it’s the knees that are getting straightened, Dr. Strabismus.

        • An incidental advantage of the ‘Utrechto-Stretch Mk. VI’ is that it may help gentlemen who wish to change which side they dress on…

          • Sherbet

            If Dr. Strabismus were not so balky about wearing his corrective lenses, perhaps he would have had a better look at what was going on vis a vis the gentleman demonstrating the Mk. VI. Yeeeeouch!

          • Indeed. My right trouser leg is longer than my left. But my left testicle hangs lower than my right.
            I need a punch line here, but don’t have one yet.

            • Betty

              TMI

            • I meant to add that.

            • FredEX2

              Shorpy! Report to ethics for a sec ck immediately!

            • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

              The new Super Power Leg/Testicular Alignment Rundown for Gentlemen will take care of your problem. Using a complicated series of weights, pulleys, and counterweights, the scrotum and legs are painfully manipulated, realigned, and restored to a state of 100% fully OT legs and testicles.

              https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/a77bdcd8502ca713eb9726396fde9ae8408997235b3496bb446e712a38561f4b.jpg

            • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

              In the event of accidental scrotum detachment, the patient is guaranteed a position in the Sea Org Eunuch Brigade.

            • Sherbet

              But don’t they have a heckofa fantastic choir!

      • OTVIIIisGrrr8!

        May we remind you of the doctrine of sovereign immunity: Royalty may not be sued without its consent. His Majesty David Miscavige does not consent to being sued by Dr. Strabismus of Utrecht (on whom be peace).

        https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/b81670fd5cb523f4983d1dbf6c7982595a3fe1d32ebe31c50092f20512e913f9.png

        • Sherbet

          That gown just screams out for more bows. And pearls! Perhaps some lace! Yes, more bows, pearls, and lace!

        • Lèse majesté?!

          • Sherbet

            Louse Majesty.

    • Placeholder: I’m trying to work in an oiliness table reference.

      • LongtimeLurker

        Respect.

  • Juicer77

    Rinder’s blog is reporting a live stream of the San Diego Grand Opening! Probably already mentioned here hours ago but made me guffaw anyway. ETA: there *will be* a live stream. Not saying it is happening now.

    • Harpoona Frittata

      Oh, that’s just askin’ for trouble! I really have a hard time imagining $cn ever doing anything completely live for fear that some evil purped SP could infiltrate their funfest and unfurl a big “FREE XENU!!! banner that would be sure to go viral in minutes on Youtube. My bet is that anything they they promote as being a live streamed event will actually be on a 10 second or so delay, so that they can avoid being “enthetavized”.

      • Juicer77

        Rinder doubts it will happen. So do I. If they do live broadcast anything it will be extraneous to the actual event. And I can’t imagine Mismanage 1) allocating resources to anything other than his own appearance and 2) any excuse for people, and more importantly their wallets, to not attend!

        • LongtimeLurker

          They’ve done batcrap insane foot-bullets before.

          If we all postulate real hard, we could make this happen.

        • chukicita

          I can’t imagine live broadcast anything. Too many variables out of DM’s control.

        • Techie

          Another good reason that it will not be directly live broadcast is that for around 20 years everything Dave has released in public has been carefully edited. They shoot all the rehearsals for the speech, then shoot the speech with nine cameras, then it is reviewed and if there are any stumbles or mis-spoken lines they reshoot those lines. With all that footage there is plenty of room for cutaways so there are no jump-cuts when he is full screen. You can fix anything and make the mistakes look OK by cutting them in on a long shot or audience reaction shot or cutting away to a visual right before the edit. This was not true in the 90s. The original “War is Over” IRS victory event at the Sports Arena in LA was broadcast live via satellite, warts and all. Organizations all around the world were watching.

          • i just had the epiphany that this one was probably already filmed weeks ago to look “live”, too

          • Juicer77

            Great point.

      • chukicita

        Or WHERE’S SHELLY?

    • Kestrel

      Watch with billions across planet earth as SMP live streams the San Diego Ideal Org Grand Opening! Just turn to (channel TBD) at (time TBD) on (date TBD). Contact your cable provider today to gain access to the (TBD Network) today! Mark your calendar right now!

  • Lousy Ratatouille
  • LongtimeLurker

    Mike Rinder posted a flyer about a special briefing for OT VIII’s.

    You get to meet the new OT IX & X Director of Training. So apparently the long-awaited upper levels are right around the corner…pffft.

    But here’s what really caught my eye;

    “*Find out what you can do to help open up the top of the Bridge!”

    Finally…we’ve waited decades for OT IX and X and now we know what the hold up was…

    Scientologists.

    It’s all their fault.

    Not Miscavige’s or Ron’s or even SPs and Psyches.

    Scientologists haven’t been….doing…whatever it is that Russ McKevitt is going to reveal on the 27th of November.

    Counter-intentioned dilettantes.

    • Yeah, good post by Mike today.
      Lots of crazy.

      • LongtimeLurker

        Right? It was never-ending (in a good way).

        Man, they churn out the BS.

    • chukicita

      “*Find out what you can do to help open up the top of the Bridge!”

      So it’s a drawbridge now? Or a can of soda?

      • LongtimeLurker

        I guess?

        They’ve spent decades backing themselves into a corner with this Bridge metaphor.

        It’s a trainwreck.

        The bridge goes over and up?

        But it has a top? That’s more like a ladder.

        And now the top is closed? It’s a ladder with like a hatch 3/4 the way up?

        Screw it, I’m trying Catholicism.

        • Good luck with the Trinity.

          • kemist

            Our god is made out of a guy, his son who’s really himself plus some ghost that has nothing to do with anything else. And don’t get me started on all the minigods with each their specialties. But we’re monotheists.

            Don’t ask me how that works, I was born into it, and the only answer I’ve ever got is “it’s a great mystery”.

            • From my perspective the doctrine of the Trinity was the result of a political compromise between elements of the early Church, which held Christianity together at the expense of a coherent theology.

              The problem with faith, of course, is that the whole thing can be declared to be a holy mystery beyond the wit of man, and the people who got their organisation into such a mess can pass the buck.

            • DoveAlexa

              They should have kept the Book of Enoch. That shit was awesome.
              Which reminds me, I ought to find some videos of non-faith people discussing the christian mythos. Probably be as entertaining and weird as Hindu.

            • Just for the record, I don’t have it in for Christianity. I’m just fascinated by the intellectual contortions that people are willing to go through in the name of faith.

              Presenting unquestioning acceptance as an admirable quality is the ultimate cop-out, when your theology is utterly unconvincing.

        • chukicita

          Those guys on the flyer. Looked like they’d be selling used cemetery plots, or ostrich eggs or laundry balls if they weren’t selling Scientology.

      • Observer

        A can of flat soda with a dead rat in it.

      • Harpoona Frittata

        Apparently, I’m already OaTy because I know exactly what it’s going to take to do that…money and a whole lot of it 😉

    • April

      Noooooo…they’re mamby pamby counter-intentioned delettantes!

      • LongtimeLurker

        Sob. I’ll never make a good Sea Ogre.
        = (

        • April

          Me neither. I’d be telling them to go fuck themselves within the first ten seconds.

      • Robert Eckert

        Theety-weety namby-pamby CICS!

  • Oopsy-Davy! Looks like San Diego’s been raided already! (Refresh memories of July’s stercoraceous incident): https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/89e8c09966b9df07ffd295921c57bf499ddd4a6dfa63907aa329b7c486a101a0.jpg

    • Sherbet

      Wow, it’s so short of staff that cob himself has to man the desk! (I’ll bet he defaced lrh’s portrait in a peckish moment.)

      • Or some wag from the EPF did it while delivering the official Org T.P. (that’s Shortarse’s story, and he’s sticking to… COB doesn’t have to explain himself to anyone!!)

        • Sherbet

          Damn right!

    • LongtimeLurker

      Oopsy-Davy is awesome.

    • Ella Raitch

      Those Hungarians are so thoughtful!

  • LongtimeLurker

    OT

    Jason Beghe just grabbed another suspect by the facial hair while growling at him.

    That’s 3 this season.

    It’s my new favorite thing.

  • kemist

    This is hilarious (from Mike Rinder’s Thursday Funnies)

    Success Story

    Way back when I started this journey, I thought it would be a walk int he park. I was wrong.

    I didn’t know I was walking, lost, in the deep scary woods. Without a map or compass. However, I did have a blindfold.

    I thought I was driving my car on a road, so to speak. That was a bit wrong as I started to find out.

    I did not know there was even a guide with me, let alone that they had a compass and a map. Hell, I was busy driving my own car… or so I thought !

    Then gradually, I became aware of the woods and trees. I had shoes instead of a car, lack of a road… Out of that, I became aware of the guide, his compass, a road map, the road, the sky and the car. I finally got in.

    More importantly, I became me, driving my car in the sunlight with my guides (a van full of guides actually).

    Then finally, I saw the horizon… mind blown.

    I can’t thank my team of guides enough; SRD Sup, Auditors and C/S and of course, the map-maker, LRH

    … I think someone got lost inside their analogies.

    • LongtimeLurker

      Halfway through I started thinking the author was talking about some kind of OT dream, but had forgotten to mention that part.

      Then I got to the last sentence and realized that, as you point out, it was just a massively long, tortured analogy.

      Also, aren’t Success Stories traditionally about some actual “IRL” proof of Sooper Powerz?

      This one is just “yep I’m better at life now, take my word for it”. It’s heartfelt and all, and even heartwarming if you don’t know Scientology, but …

  • grundoon

    A Science Minute with L. Ron Hubbard

    Scientology introduces new and more workable ways of thinking about things. It has found that an absolute is unobtainable; neither zero nor infinity are as themselves discoverable in a real universe but, as absolutes, may be posed as symbols for an abstraction which could be supposed to exist but which does not exist in fact. Therefore, there would be no absolute good and no absolute evil. A thing to be “good” would depend on the viewpoint of the observer, and the same condition would exist for “bad.”

    Several new concepts germane to the fields of science and humanities almost independent of its own work have been introduced by Scientology. The first of these is the proper definition of a static. The next is the first actual definition of zero and its differentiation from infinity in terms of mathematics. Another is the basic definition of space which hitherto was omitted from the field of physics except in terms of time and energy. …

    Mathematics could be said to be the abstract art of symbolizing associations. Mathematics pretends to deal in equalities but equalities themselves do not exist in the MEST universe, and can exist only conceptually in any universe. Mathematics are a general method of bringing to the fore associations which might not be perceived readily without their use. The human mind is a servo-mechanism to all mathematics. Mathematics can abstractly form by their mechanics coincidences and differences outside the field of experience in any universe and are enormously useful. They can best be used when considered to be a shorthand of experience and in the light that they can symbolize what is beyond actuality. The essence of mathematics lies in differentiation, association, identification, which is to say, equalities must not be viewed as fixed in the real universe. Absolutes are unobtainable in experience but may be symbolized by mathematics.

    – L. Ron Hubbard
    SCIENTOLOGY 8-8008
    1952

    • Sherbet

      Sorry, Ron, I sorta dozed off. What was that again?

      • Observer

        Translation: “Calculus is stupid. I is smart.”

      • kemist

        I think he said that his cat’s breath smells like cat food.

        In mathematical servo-mechanistic symbolic talk-thingy.

        • LongtimeLurker

          L Ron Hubbard; the Ralph Wiggum of fake religion scammers.

    • Harpoona Frittata

      “The human mind is a servo-mechanism to all mathematics.”

      But you, sir, are a bad ham sandwich that should be eaten by no one!

    • He never defined the word or concept of a Static! ….bloody fool. He just took it and wrote it in a book, without any explanation. What he should have wrote, was that a Static is unobtainable but that makes his “Teack”, totally obsolete, so he didn’t…
      eta: cool that you post these gems, grundoon, i read them every time to get reconfirmed.

  • Bert Allen

    I noted that the San Diego flyer did not describe it as the opening of an Ideal Org. Looks like the COS has given up on “achieving” that in San Diego.

  • Mockingbird

    US Uncut just reported a Muslim man was firebombed while driving his truck. Thanks Trump. This is the America you wanted. I want no part of it.

    • “Remember to look up to the stars and not down at your feet. Try to make sense of what you see and wonder about what makes the universe exist. Be curious and however life may seem there’s always something you can do and succeed at – it matters that you don’t just give up.”
      -Stephen Hawking, Nov 17 2016

      unrelated positive message:
      Thousands Pledge To Stand By Neighbors Who Are Frightened Post-Election
      http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/supporting-frightened-neighbors-election_us_582c821fe4b058ce7aa85de0

      • Mockingbird

        Those are nice words of advice from a man who literally cannot follow them.

        There’s a Nazi taking power and positive sayings ain’t gonna cut it.

        • standing alongside our frightened neighbors might cut it and i’d stand by you, and anyone else here, any time.

          • OOkpik

            <3

          • Mockingbird

            I appreciate it. We will stand together against Trump or be ashamed even IF he doesn’t come for us. History taught us the result of being conservative and ignoring the crimes of a fascist. We cannot plead ignorance this time. We can fight, leave or be accomplices.

  • How odd. Annual Memberships with CCHR are $25 and $300 for Lifetime. But here they are advertising it at 40% off and it comes with a shirt for $29? P.S. I can already see that eventually they will probably have all the same joke statuses like the IAS. I pity anyone suckered into giving them money (at least for a few minutes).

  • flyonthewall

    Do you like dolphins? Do you like cats? Are you a 10 yr old girl? Then this gif is just for you https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/b1b8e7dd597c71da6ee4c93fefdc19651f86d8f10cac100c7abfd7b9b3cc3928.gif

    • LongtimeLurker

      I do like dolphins. I do like cats. I like dogs even more. This gif is for me
      http://pctrs.network.hu/clubpicture/1/4/8/3/_/baratsaggif7_1483126_9248.gif

      • flyonthewall

        My daughter did this dolphin interaction thing at a marine life sanctuary and she loved it. I didn’t know dogs could do it too, that’s pretty cool.

        • LongtimeLurker

          I like it when animal species who don’t normally interact get on well. Like those polar bears that visit the huskies for playtime once a year.

          It makes me feel better about the world.

          That dolphin interaction thing – that kind of experience is great when you’re a ki…

          …you have a daughter?

          • flyonthewall

            2 actually

            • LongtimeLurker

              So…4 kids?

              3?

              12…

            • flyonthewall

              yep, 4. Boys are 13 & 12, girls are 10 & 8. Hope you get to meet them one day. You doing Howdycon? We prob won’t.

            • LongtimeLurker

              I hope so too. : )

              Probably not, unfortunately. Unless I have an unexpected cash influx.

    • JJ

      Dolphin: “Hello.”
      Cat….’Look at all the eatin’ on that fisss.’

  • TheMirrorThetan

    I was looking at the title pic of Davey.
    Do you think he goes to bed the night before with big curlers in or wears one of those Bumpit things to get the high hair? 😀

    • flyonthewall

      Bumpit or dump it! That’s what Davey always says

      • TheMirrorThetan

        I would hate to be the poor bastard who has to do his hair for events.
        If you hit a knot or get hairspray in his eyes, you are gonna get a touch assist to the face.

    • LongtimeLurker

      Is it possible he just lets it hang loose until he’s got a photo op, then the Sea Org Hair Team has to make it look great the way it does?

      And he screams at them and beats them throughout the process.

      That way it’s less work for him (and more violent abuse, to which he is partial).

      • LongtimeLurker

        Bumpits is not a good name for something you put on your head.

        It sounds like a cross between ‘bum’ and ‘armpits’.

        Or is that just me?

        • MarcabExpat

          A Bumpit is called that because you use It to bump up the height of your hair, but your explanation is much, much better.

          Here is a pic of the world’s most famous Bumpit wearer, wearing her Bumpit: [f5]

          https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/1320027289/bumpit_400x400.jpg

          • LongtimeLurker

            Oh Sarah Louise. Will she ever win?

          • JJ

            Dammit that’s a woodchuck under there!

      • TheMirrorThetan

        At least his hair looks more lifelike than Travolta’s. I remember one time it looked like painted on lego hair. LOL.

        • LongtimeLurker

          In the future, all men will have painted-on hair.

          But right now, poor John just looks crazy.

          • Liberated

            I always thought JT’s hair looked like a Chia-Pet.

            • LongtimeLurker

              Don’t give him ideas!

    • Scream Nevermore

      This is him before the hairdresser, and the makeup artist from the local funeral parlour work their magic: https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/092fea5ab9c6bc7eaf3d78cb7244c251825c911a9729bb248c7fdfbbef46e6cc.jpg

    • dungeon master

      Bed head and a blow dryer, then hairspray. IMHO.

    • JJ

      In ancient times people used little wooden pillows that had like neck divots to hold their hair up off the bed to preserve ornate hair dos…the more things change. And I am looking it up, I don’t know how to phrase it, it just keeps spinning.

    • ReallyMGM

      As his forehead creeps higher, his bouffant gets taller. And the hairline….perfectly straight, plucked or photoshopped?

      • TheMirrorThetan

        Ha you are right. His forehead is creeping higher. 😀

        • ReallyMGM

          Do you think he looks in the mirror and says to himself, “I look so good!” LOL

          • TheMirrorThetan

            Of course, he probably talks to the mirror each day and says ” Mirror mirror on the wall who is the fairest one of all?” 😂

  • flyonthewall

    Do you like wiener dogs? Do you like tea bagging? Then this gif is just for you

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5676dcb67cce5893799618978832c8a05bfd798f61e8695d15bb4c1037e08cdb.gif

    • Ella Raitch

      The look on that cat’s face…priceless…

      Oh the indignity!

    • Observer

      Wiener dogs are deliberate in all they do.

      • flyonthewall

        do your wiener dogs do that? Is that a thing with this breed?

        • Observer

          No, thank goodness

          • flyonthewall

            don’t let them see this gif

        • Observer

          The Velociraptor has peed on Mr Observer a couple of times though.

          • flyonthewall

            that’s rude, I hope he peed back

            • Observer

              No, he just squawked with outrage.

          • Rasha

            KITTEH!!!

    • iampissed

      Who said it was a male dog…just asking.

      • LongtimeLurker

        Is it called something else if a lady-person does it?

        I should probably know this, for after the apocalypse and what not.

        • Kimmy3

          crumpet dumper?
          clotted creamer?

    • MarcabExpat

      That dog does not understand the risks involved in this maneuver. Underneath all that squirmy, pink-nosed, laid-back fuzziness lies a full-grown CAT.

    • noseinabk
  • iampissed
  • Observer
    • iampissed

      Sometimes a cigar is really just a cigar.

    • MarcabExpat

      I think I like this whole interaction very much, and may try it tomorrow in this small town I’m visiting. Being a stranger in this small community, I should do my part to provide entertainment.

      • LongtimeLurker

        I approve of your planned shenanigans.

    • JJ

      Depends, what was the weather like AND what color was the briefcase? Very important!

    • Robert Eckert

      The sheep flies at midnight.

      • JJ

        The man with the goat shirt can not be trusted….

  • Scream Nevermore
    • Scream Nevermore

      And I just found out that it’s one of the few Scientology accounts that hasn’t barred me! Woot!

  • flyonthewall

    I queued it to where he mentions Dianetics in this drug fueled rant

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mkyDW_Qd4G4&t=2m18s

    • LongtimeLurker

      Jebus, Al.

      • flyonthewall

        Right. Disgusting

  • arcinva

    I just got around to watching the Halloween episode of the sitcom “Superstore”. One of the characters was telling another character what their coworkers thought/said about him. She said, “… and some people think you’re a Sea Org. Whatever that is.” I googled it to make sure my ears weren’t deceiving me.

    • iampissed

      They are everywhere…even when they don’t want to be.

    • LongtimeLurker

      What the what?

      Going to find episode.

      ps – thanks.

      • arcinva

        You’re welcome! I was certain my ears had just been influenced by too much time in the Underground Bunker. LOL! But, sure enough, Google proved I heard right.

  • nottrue

    Mystery Plane was OSA scouting HowdyCon….. https://twitter.com/DenverChannel/status/799240272240644096

    • Kay (aka Nasty Lady)

      Actually it was Trump’s plane….he was lost because he apparently doesn’t know where the White House is…..OR it’s another one of those weirdo Denver Airport things.

  • salin

    Reminder to click the recommend (the heart just under the comments count) for today’s UB edition and comments.

    Abisko Sweden experienced this natural space opera (aurora activity):

    http://spaceweathergallery.com/indiv_upload.php?upload_id=130881&PHPSESSID=hj0fv19jvjmq1hpel2e6mtlis2

    • everchangingmeezer (wogsy)

      Sooooo pretty

  • everchangingmeezer (wogsy)

    I refuse an hclf lifestyle – I love meat!

  • JJ

    Listen to NPR. Read Mother Jones, stock pile water and food stuffs…

  • Things are going to be just fine. Well, not much worse. Cheer up.

    • daisy

      You will be fine , he likes Russians. A little worried for Muslims.

    • LongtimeLurker

      OT

      Hey, I watched Hell or High Water.

      I liked it.

      I’m a Ben Foster fan anyway but I thought Chris Pine was really good, and I normally can’t stand him.

      That is all.

  • beetee

    Undruggable!
    Unshockable!
    Robots!

  • beetee

    Heard a rumor that Chili changed his name to
    “Chili Big Bean” and was christened that name by the IAS registrar prior to moving up in status.

  • 4chanpartyvan

    Unrelated to post.
    The vidya game watch dogs 2 that has just been released has a group of missions that are a backhanded slap at scientology,Tom Cruise and the anon movement of 2008.Good to see the gaming industry poke fun at these guys.
    Worth a look if you have time

    • Scream Nevermore

      It is now officially on my ‘have a look’ list!

  • Mockingbird

    New article on which household cleaners won’t get that swastika off your garage door.

    http://reductress.com/post/4-household-cleaners-that-wont-clean-the-swastika-off-your-garage-door/

    • LongtimeLurker

      Oh my.

  • Missionary Kid

    OT. I just watched The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Nichole Kidman was on to promote her new movie.

    Nichole brought her husband, Kieth Urban out in a surprise move that Jimmy didn’t expect. My comment is that she looked happier and was more affectionate with Kieth than she ever did with little Tommy.

    • ReallyMGM

      My daughter met Nicole several weeks after she married Keith Urban at the furniture store she worked at in Nashville when she was in college. It was a family owned store that had a very relaxed vibe for customers. Nicole became a regular customer for a couple of months. My daughter didn’t talk about any of her customers to anyone out of respect for their privacy, but she said Nicole was a genuinely nice person.

  • Missionary Kid

    I was hoping that San Diego would have rain on Saturday for the grand opening of the Ideal smorg, but I checked the weather, and it’s supposed to be clear. The rain should hit late Sunday night/early Monday morning.

    • keep an eye on those parking spots. if they turn out empty, we know there are Oateas in the area!

  • OOkpik
    • omg! that’s not supposed to be revealed to humans

    • I have seen Meme showing another cat how to go through a Cat Door. I was not myself for 3 weeks after that!!

      • OOkpik

        Apparently Meme plans on having friends over. You might never be allowed to be yourself again. 😉

        • i’m afraid of that 🙂 Sometimes it invites Rat’s over, but they are usually DOA

      • Scream Nevermore

        One of my friends had a cat who used to sit beside the electronic cat flap, so it would open and let all his friends into the house. Joe regularly came home to find anything u to a dozen cats destroying his house!

        • Mymy88

          I totally believe that (about the electronic cat door) lol. Cats are a trip LOL.

    • TheMirrorThetan

      If those two were mine, I would never piss them off. For fear I would have a fatal fall or funny “accident”.

      • OOkpik

        🙂

    • NOLAGirl (Stephanie)
      • OOkpik

        Haha!

        Morning, Sunshine. <3

  • Boyd Johnson

    The San Diego grand opening was tonight! We went down 4th Ave and it was closed for a Block starting at Ash. They were filling up many busses full of people probably heading back to LA and cleaning up a lot they had some things set up earlier. Lots of black suits. The org looks very pretty compared to the ugly facade before they remodeled. They boldly emblazon Scientology across the front instead of hiding behind Dianetics.