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Every thing that creepeth upon the earth: We make our first appearance

 
Australian fires. African locusts. Worldwide plague. Do we live in Biblical times or what? If the world really is ending, we thought it was time to prepare properly for Armageddon. By, you know, reading the damn thing. The Bible, that is. (Go back to the beginning here.)

 
Yesterday we got stars and birds, and it was good. Let’s see what we have in store for us as Creation moves into its sixth day.

Genesis 1 King James Version (KJV)

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24 And God said, Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind, cattle, and creeping thing, and beast of the earth after his kind: and it was so. 25 And God made the beast of the earth after his kind, and cattle after their kind, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind: and God saw that it was good. 26 And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth. 27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. 28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. 29 And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which is the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat. 30 And to every beast of the earth, and to every fowl of the air, and to every thing that creepeth upon the earth, wherein there is life, I have given every green herb for meat: and it was so. 31 And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day.

Genesis 1 New International Version (NIV)

24 And God said, “Let the land produce living creatures according to their kinds: the livestock, the creatures that move along the ground, and the wild animals, each according to its kind.” And it was so. 25 God made the wild animals according to their kinds, the livestock according to their kinds, and all the creatures that move along the ground according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good. 26 Then God said, “Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness, so that they may rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky, over the livestock and all the wild animals, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.” 27 So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. 28 God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.” 29 Then God said, “I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the whole earth and every tree that has fruit with seed in it. They will be yours for food. 30 And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds in the sky and all the creatures that move along the ground — everything that has the breath of life in it — I give every green plant for food.” And it was so. 31 God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. And there was evening, and there was morning — the sixth day.

 
Doesn’t it seem awfully convenient that the authors, writing sometime around 2,500 years ago, decided retroactively that the Creator had come up with animals and birds and crops and fruit-bearing trees so that we might have “dominion” over it all and “subdue” it for our own purposes?

Not to second-guess our ancestors, but isn’t this the kind of selfish attitude about our animal companions on this planet that has led us to present-day creatures like Joe Exotic and Doc Antle and Carole Baskin?

Speaking of which, you know what passed by so quickly and we kept looking for more explanation that never came, but didn’t the narrator or Joe Exotic (we can’t remember which) say that Jeff Lowe had strangled his first wife? What’s up with that! How do you drop something like that without expanding on it?

We’re not saying that it deserved an entire episode, like the absolutely gripping exploration of what happened to Don Lewis — by the way, what’s your feeling, did she or didn’t she? — but at least asking Lowe about what happened with his ex would have been helpful.

Now that we mention it, we can’t help thinking about feeding those tigers. You think you’re having a hard time making the stuff in your pantry stretch, how are those poor animals doing during the pandemic. Anyone know?

 
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Posted by Tony Ortega on March 29, 2020 at 12:00

 

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