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Marisol Nichols prepares for her greatest role: Scientology space cadet!

Marisol_Nichols_ThumbOn Sundays, we like to reveal to you the wackiest Scientology e-mails, fliers, and other come-ons that were sent out to church members during the past week. And this week, the most exciting news that they received was about one of their celebrities, Marisol Nichols.

Nichols reached new heights of fame after her role as Special Agent Nadia Yassir in 24‘s sixth season. But she’s also reached new heights in her career as a Scientologist. As you’ll see in an exciting e-mail that was sent out to church members, Marisol has reached the pinnacle of spiritual achievement, and she’s going to speak at her graduation on Friday at the Hollywood Celebrity Centre!

We learned about this when one of our tipsters forwarded to us an e-mail from Tom Cruise’s former personal assistant, Andrea Doven, who just recently celebrated a graduation of her own at the Celebrity Centre. And now, look how excited she is to announce Marisol’s event…

Marisol_Nichols_Flier

 
According to Scientology’s own publications, Marisol went “clear” in 2000, and now, 13 years later, she’s reached the top end of the Bridge to Total Freedom — she’s achieved Operating Thetan Level 8. This means that Marisol should have the ability to exteriorize from her body, affect matter with her mind, bring the recently dead to back to life, and be clairvoyant, immune to disease, and she should have a sky-high IQ and total recall. We can only hope she shows off her new super human powers at the graduation event! (And we hope that it’s soon online.)

To get a sense for what is said at these graduation events, please take a look at Andrea Doven’s own graduation that was posted online just recently. We can only hope that Marisol’s words are as memorable!

Speaking of Doven, she really got the red carpet treatment in this swell celebration of her Scientology success…

GoClearNewsletter

 
The gals from the Valley are back! Remember what a slick job they did promoting a “Bowlarama Smackdown” for the Valley’s Ideal org last summer? Well, now they’re back with this special offer on doors for the new church. At only $200 to get your name on a door at the new Ideal Org, it’s a steal!

 
And that’s not all the Valley org is up to. We only wish we could have attended this party last night so we could get to know the gals from the Valley even better!

ValleyOrgValentines

 
The San Francisco org steps up with this nifty flier, and we’d love to know how they’re going to use the Eighth Wonder of the World to smack down the psychs!

KingKongFlier

 
Meanwhile, last night in LA, it sounds like some folks got a briefing about what the church plans to do with old KCET television studios the church bought in 2011…

LAIdealFlier

 
Finally, we must share with you a video that’s been going around for a few days. It’s a lovely Grant Cardone sentiment that seems like some kind of bookend to the video produced by his wife Elena which we posted last week. These two really were made for each other, weren’t they? Ah, true love.

 
Thanks again to our wonderful tipsters. Please keep those fliers and e-mails and videos coming!

—————

Posted by Tony Ortega on February 24, 2013 at 07:00

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  • Chocolate Velvet

    I admit, I am excited about the possibilities of a scientology “broadcast station” for dissemination. Considering the reaction they consistently get to their promotional materials — it’s spooky and/or hilarious — just imagine the effect of regular broadcasts of those videos they love.

    If there is by some chance anyone left in the LA area who doesn’t know about the crazy, that should take care of it. That would certainly be an “ideal LA”.

    • 1subgenius

      My fervent hope is that they actually broadcast.
      Other than some crap on youtube they don’t really “dissemenate” (sic) to the general public in any kind of even 20th (sic) century way.
      Dollars to donuts this will never happen.

      • TheHoleDoesNotExist

        Don’t they have to get the Super Power running before they can open the broadcast station?
        Okay, I just made that up. But you just know the Station Renovations “Party” is a’comin’.

      • Ze Moo

        A real broadcasting cable channel would be a wonderful cash drain on the clams. They would have to pay all the cable stations to carry it, instead of the other way around. I really like Schubbards ‘the big clam theory’. How about ‘The Thetan Love Boat’? ‘Clearwater PI’ and “This Old Org”?

        • Missionary Kid

          They’d probably staff it with junior clams and bring in some hired guns to do the heavy lifting. That would cut costs to a certain extent. Then, what they’d do is try to claim some sort of religious exemption for the property taxes when they broadcast “religion.”

          People don’t realize that Pat Robertson made millions when he sold the cable network he personally owned that broadcast the 700 Club. Maybe something like it is in the works for Co$ and Dinky Midget.

    • Ze Moo

      Just think about it, a 24 hour 7 day a week, 365 day a year scientology cable channel. With wonderful programs like, ‘Third Mortgages are the new Normal”, “The 780,000 Dollar Club”, “The Xenu Power Hour”, “Grant Cardones Dating Game (and credit scoring test)”. Coming soon to a Cable network near you……

      • Still_On_Your_Side

        Yeah, the station will broadcast “DIY Divorces for When Your Spouse Has Given All of His/Her Money to the Church,” “How to Find a Credit Score of 700 with Legs,” “Door Knobs for Dummies,” and, finally, for those in the Sea Org, “DIY Sterilization.” Oh, and ” The Hating Game.”

        • And Davey Miscavige and Tommy Cruise starring in “Two Half Men”.

          • Missionary Kid

            What’s the other half?

      • Schmubbard

        Don’t forget “2 broke girls” and “How I met your theta”

      • RMycroft

        Two girls, one tech? Hub Girl?

  • Editing tech produces: “more HAPPIER”

    ’nuff said.

    • Observer

      Argh, you got there first.

    • BosonStark

      It also makes you “Bozo-the Clown.” Bad enough to feel like Bozo, you have to go around missing a hyphen. Where is their thinkingness?

      • BuryTheNuts2

        In their assingness.

        • nessness

          messing with the nessing ness is like a day with sunshine.

          • FistOfXenu

            We call that “messingness” right?

            • nessness

              things could get nessy with the messingness – I like it!

  • whingeybingey

    Ugh! I have to go and wash the creepy out of my hair now. He’s like something out of Deliverance.

    • FistOfXenu

      Cmon now, squeal like a pig!
      Well, he’s not exactly talented enough to play banjo is he?

      • Observer

        That’s why he’s got the slave labor force.

      • whingeybingey

        Lol!

  • Bob

    SF org. fundraiser. Hear the data on how CCHR will take out Psychiatry soon. The IAS ploy to get dollars from donors without spending any of it on CCHR. Wonder where the money goes? To pay for The Narconon screw ups. Or possibly to line the pockets of the mini-Midas of Mayantology?

    • Roger Larsson

      A Citizens Commission of Human Rights clearing the planet with an ape fights for An Apes Commission of Apes Rights?

      Is the data taking out Psychiatry quoted from The science-fiction novel “Planet of the Apes”?

      The piltdown Man in Hubbards “A history of Man” 1952, was characterized by “freakish acts of strange ‘logic,’ of demonstrating dangerous on one’s fellows, of eating one’s wife and other somewhat illogical activities.

      In 1953 was Piltdown Man exposed as a hoax.

      • BuryTheNuts2

        Good Morning Roger.
        I don’t know how you did it, but I am starting to understand everything you say perfectly!
        Piltdown Man was exposed as a hoax about the same time Hubbard should have been exposed himself.

        • Roger Larsson

          http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scientology:_A_History_of_Man

          http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Piltdown_Man

          If Pavlov,Maslow and other sources were heroes and Hubbard a thief things said by Hubbard can be of interest but said by a thief and not as a source.

          To give Hubbard an acknowledgement of being anyone else than a thief is to give him an acknowledgement of being someone he wasn’t.

          • BuryTheNuts2

            I agree. LRH was 100% a thief.

            • Observer

              And 99% PR.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
              ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
              ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

              sorry, I had to do it.

        • FistOfXenu

          We have to be REALLY glad the Hub never exposed himself.

          Oh wait, you said –

      • Captain Howdy

        Roger, remember the ending of ‘Planet of the Apes’ where Charles Heston is walking along the beach and all the sudden he sees the giant scientology double cross buried in the sand and he screams:

        “You Maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell! “

        • Roger Larsson

          Unforgetable…..He thought he was on an other planet when it stroke him that he in the reality had been on Earth all the time. To wake up from false data and face the truth ensure life on Earth.

          • how about you just type in your language ( tell us what it is ) and then we can use google to translate cause i can’t smoke pot all day long in order to try to understand you . The munchies will kill me

            • Captain Howdy

              I like the way he types, it’s like haiku or somethin’

            • Roger Larsson

              To drop the english and apply swedish is a decline.

              Automatic control engineering consists of ON’s and OFF’s. It’s something basic in the computer world. Scientologists aren’t the only ones created by programmers.

            • seriously …just speak spanish 😉

              p.s. i am being sarcastic. If i need to smoke a joint to bond with you ..i am more than happy to do it . That is the kind of chick i am …all nice and thoughtful and stuff .

              Jag är glad att ni är här

            • Roger Larsson

              I’m a minimalist. I cut off the meet and deliver bones. Some times am I generous and deliver more than bones.

              The relevant question in the context is if Hubbard was sane and if his Church of Scientology is sane?

            • Captain Howdy

              Yes Roger, “Ness is not more” but “less” certainly is.

            • Roger Larsson

              Right!

              Scientologists should work more with their own thinking before they act in the world.

            • hubbard was a whack job – scientology is bullshit – and scientologists are nutters . Not sure how to say that is swedish

            • Roger Larsson

              Something like this.

              At the bottom is it the bottom we have to go to the bottom with. Too much weight lays on the weight of Hubbard’s weight.

              To make the World’s stuff or Hubbard’s stuff?

              Scientologists don’t make any bad or good stuff, they makes Hubbard’s stuff making them to
              Hubbard. They are Hubbard’s stuff.

              The stuff a guy makes is the guy.

              A head without any hands doesn’t make any crimes and hands without the sick head of Hubbard don’t make crimes on his orders.

              The criminal head of Hubbard disconnected from scientologists hands makes the world saner.

  • D.Geiger

    So for 75 bucks you get a door nob,for 200 your name goes on a door.These 2 women who act like 12 year old girls are going to convince adults that this is a great bargain.Now I know why I have lost any respect I once had for the human race.

    • Don’t be a sucker. If you listen carefully, your name goes on the “door honor roll,” not on the door.

      • Observer

        It’s much easier for them to remove your name from a door honor roll than from a door when you wake up and blow.

    • I wonder how many times they are going to sell the same doors. They used this same tactic on Luis Garcia to purchase the cross for Super Power for $75K, and sold the same cross to others.

  • VickiStubing

    I love how they include definitions in the “Go Clear” newsletter. If you understand the gobbledy-gook Andrea is spouting, you don’t need the definitions, and if you don’t understand her blatherings, is that little box really gonna help you?

    Also, she doesn’t share her important work with Mr. Big Being hisself. If the idea is to motivate people to go up the bridge to nowhere, wouldn’t THAT be worth mentioning?

    • Schockenawd

      Definitions are a start, but if you’re word-clearing “clear,” you’ll still need to use it in a sentence (perhaps, “To clear oneself of her reactive mind, one must be willing to clear out her bank account.”). Also, word-clearing requires us to come up with an example of a clear. How ’bout Lisa McPherson? “Unaberrated”? Check. Rational? Check. Best possible solutions? Check.

  • EnthralledObserver

    What’s that saying… ah yes: If you marry for money, you earn every penny! Ain’t that the truth. On ya, Grant Cardone… you clueless idiot!

    • whingeybingey

      Taking whoring to a whole ‘nother level!!

    • FistOfXenu

      He’s such a romantic softy isn’t he? I bet that chatup line of his had the girls falling at his feet saying “take me, Grant!” No wonder he ended up with Elena “stop scratching” Cardone.

  • 1subgenius

    OT VIII makes Andrea feel like a Bozo the Clown blow up toy.
    Can’t make this shit up.

    • TheHoleDoesNotExist

      dont forget Invincible Imbecile. oh, and More Happier

    • Captain Howdy

      Andrea being disciplined by Suri Cruise in happier times.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K9zHfE6YyFI

    • Still_On_Your_Side

      Yes, full of air and nothing else.

    • Are_sics

      With the weight at the bottom. Very important!

      • FistOfXenu

        “With the weight at the bottom” – so she’s gonna end up like Kirstie Alley?

    • FistOfXenu

      Don’t forget “You punch it and it bounces back up”. I think she just explained why the Demented Midget’s entourage of yes men keep taking his beatdowns instead of telling him to fuck himself as they leave. It’s not because they’re afraid of him it’s because one of their wins is to be like a Bozo punch bag toy.

      • RMycroft

        He’s always taking a chance with that.

        Obituary: Accidentally fell out of a window after having his arm broke and being slammed into walls and furniture.

        It happens.

    • swell

      What I want to know is who the hell said “Yeah, that’s good. Let’s print that.”

      I can’t stop shaking my head and giggling.

      • FistOfXenu

        That’s too sophisticated. Somebody said “look! a reference to something carefree and childlike! it’ll make her sound normal and prove that $cientology doesn’t make people batshit crazy like the wogs always say! print it!”

        • swell

          You know, you’re probably exactly right.

  • 10oriocookies

    My thoughts on Grant and his wife: It’s hard to take two men seriously when they are sayin, “bitches” and throwing up gang signs. I fully support him marrying a transexual, I just cant get behind his money grubbing Scientology ways.

  • 1subgenius

    Those bitches selling doors are unhinged.

    • sugarplumfairy

      Don’t give them any ideas.. Next, hinges will be going for $75 a pop..

      • BuryTheNuts2

        Weatherstripping…19.95!

        • TheHoleDoesNotExist

          Door Mirrors, for their Superman costume changes.

    • MO Mom

      a door knob so that you can get out of the room they have locked you into – priceless

      • Ze Moo

        The Regs will subsidize the locking door knobs. “Would you like to buy a door?”,,,”Yes, with knobs on it”….

  • 10oriocookies

    Two more men trying to sell Scientology. Again, I fully support them being men now, just not selling Scientology.

  • mirele

    “The love of money is the root of all evil.” Sometimes the older religions say it best, Grant.

    • Ze Moo

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ll3uipTO-4A

      Though Pink Floyds “money’ is very good too. What will Grant do if the little woman gets ill and can’t work? Drop her by the side of the road? ‘In sickness and health, for richer or poorer”…… Everyone in Scamatology is disposible. I continue to spam the Nat Geo channel for employing Cardone.

      • villagedianne

        In Scientology getting a serious chronic illness means you are a downstat. Possibly a degraded being. Miscavige’s communicator (secretary/assistant) Laurisse Stuckenbrock, divorced her late ex-husband Uwe Stuckenbrock, when he became too sick with MS to be a productive, contributing member of the Sea Org. Uwe’s brother in Germany is still trying to find out the circumstances of Uwe’s illness and death, and the COS is not forthcoming. They never were, and hid from the family how sick Uwe was. We do know that Uwe was in the RPF while he was ill, and was tended by other RPF’ers. I don’t know how much real medical attention he got while there. At the end, Uwe was sent to a third-rate nursing home to die.
        Just to give the whole story an even sicker twist, Laurisse is now rumored to be dancing the horizontal Mambo with Dave.

        • BuryTheNuts2

          Just what she deserves IMHO.

        • FistOfXenu

          You sure you don’t mean “dancing horizontally with a green mamba”? Just checking.

          • Observer

            This nearly made me spit watermelon all over my monitor.

        • This is one of the things about Scientology that makes me absolutely furious. Discarding people who need help more than anyone else does; who, if they’re discarded, are pretty likely to die; and blaming those people for the horrible things they’re going through. I’m disabled and cannot take care of myself, let alone work, and I don’t know what my life would be if my husband had dropped me when it happened. Non-existent, probably.

          It’s a striking example of Scientology’s anti-love stance. This alone, even without anything else, proves how vile they are.

          • Missionary Kid

            You forgot to include their famous medical, dental, and retirement plans.

        • RMycroft

          Mambo? Wouldn’t it be more like Heavy Mental?

      • Still_On_Your_Side

        You hit the nail on the head! The single biggest reason for personal bankruptcy in the US is illness. I simply cannot comprehend how an individual can be so cold and shallow that he makes credit score the most important factor in finding a spouse and in marriage.

        • Missionary Kid

          I can comprehend it: $cientologist ethics.

          • BuryTheNuts2

            Mutually exclusive words those.

            • Observer

              I kind of like “oxymoron”.

            • Missionary Kid

              Exactly

  • Scientology media will never know success without more cowbell.

    • i feel good about myself because i totally got the cowbell reference ….;)

      • Missionary Kid

        Kim, could you explain it for us wogs? Thanks.

        • honey – i AM a wog. it is a skit with Will Ferrell on SNL …totally hysterical . I can’t cut and paste right now but it is worth a google –

          • Missionary Kid

            Thank you. I remember the bit now. It’s hilarious.

        • Observer
          • Missionary Kid

            It happened to air the other night on NBC when they had a retrospective on SNL. I just didn’t connect the two.

        • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BjsUf_oIgp0&list=PL3A774F15189626E0

          classic Saturday Night Live where Christopher Walken thinks the only problem with Blue Oyster Cult’s “Don’t Fear the Reaper” is that it needs MORE COWBELL!

        • FistOfXenu

          Not wog, A music net meme from years ago. It was a thing on Saturday Night Live. Enjoy the cowbelly goodness

          http://vimeo.com/39387904

  • “You can marry more money in one day than you can make in a damn lifetime.” Gee, now I see my mistake, I married a MAN.

  • sugarplumfairy

    grant cardone.. NY Times best selling “arthur”.. pure, unadulterated sleeeeeeeaaaaazzzzzze..

    • 1subgenius

      He actually said that.

    • BuryTheNuts2

      Isn’t that asshole like a walking testament to corruption? CO$ should be so proud.
      That calls far a shower…for reals!

    • TheHoleDoesNotExist

      Grant is the epitome of sci business ripoff artists that are always interwoven in the sci scam fabric. Sexually slimy, verbally abusive, aggressively manipulative, obnoxious, jittery, and stone cold narcisstic. Grant is the Ideal SalesCon.

  • Unex Skcus

    Cardone… total vomit.

    • BuryTheNuts2

      If Grant Cardone was my child…I would kill myself. REALLY!

      • Bob

        Bury, I think an appropriate word might be filicide but I am not recommending that as an activity. Just suggesting it over the word matricide or suicide.

        • BuryTheNuts2

          Why Bob, I think you are on to something here.
          I guess I am glad I am not related to him so I can safely remain out of jail (and alive).

          But I do think that his videos would make great targets for a shooting gallery game.

          • Bob

            Bury, LOL. I most definitely agree. With the added SFXs that if Cardone is hit, blood spews everywhere and gold coins leak out of the wounds. I have met him and his wife and hubris is his middle name.

  • Observer

    Marisol Nichols: “Her message is … well … you’ll all have to see for yourself.”
    A) If her message is anything like Andrea Doven’s graduation speech, I have no doubt that this is true.
    B) Scientology-enhanced education and intelligence in action: it should be “you’ll all have to see for yourselves”.

    Andrea Doven: “The more I did on the processing side of the bridge, the more HAPPIER and CONFIDENT and less self-invalidating I became.”
    A) Sorry, Andrea, but your grammar is worthy of self-invalidation.
    B) I’m so pleased that the last paragraph captures the magic of her graduation speech in written form.
    C) If this is astronomically enhanced IQ I don’t even want to know where she started out.
    D) Feeling like a Bozo punching bag (we had one when I was a kid): I doubt she has any idea just how apt that metaphor is.

    Chapel of Love: I do hope Gavin Potter will be speaking on how to write effective KRs on your loved ones.

    San Francisco Org Proclamation of Doom for Psychiatry:
    A) Hasn’t CCHR been promising to “take out” psychiatry “soon” for decades? Maybe they mean “soon” from a Whole Track perspective.
    B) I really hope there’s going to be video of them making psychiatrists sorry they had their convention in SF.
    C) I bet their use of that very cool artwork is some form of copyright infringement.

    Does anyone think they’ll actually broadcast anything from the corpse of KCET?

    The Asshat Cardone:
    A) “This is Grant Cardone, New York Times best-selling Arthur” … what?
    B) “I guarantee you money will come into it” … especially if you’re a Scientologist.
    C) The Cardone marriage = handcrafted in Hell by LRH’s demonic circuits. Their poor kids.

  • 1subgenius

    Wow.

    • Observer

      Is that an AGP shoop?

    • Trustmeonthis

      Bahahahaha, awesome!
      I made one reading “If you can’t afford it, you can fucking finance it!”

      • Still_On_Your_Side

        How about “if you can’t afford the Church of Scientology, Get Lost.”

        • Trustmeonthis
          • Still_On_Your_Side

            If Miscavige showed 1/10000 of the ethics of the character in that video, he might be approaching human status….

            • Trustmeonthis

              I know. That’s the sad part. It totally echoes the regging, but no one is going to take pity on those folks.

    • FistOfXenu

      Just had to try this

      • FistOfXenu

        and this

        • FistOfXenu

          and sorry it’s off topic but I just had to do this one

  • sharon brown

    Do they really still need definitions for the goals they’re trying to obtain ? I’d want to be able to handle my ” whole track amnesia first, since ” We come back” maybe I’d remember I was LRH, They are awaiting my return ..As for Mr . Cardone, he and his wife are made for each other ! Someone Please tell them to Stop trying to be hip, using bank , cake and all the other words he used, it’s too…artificial. He forgot the Most important reason to marry someone with money, so they can pay both your ways up the Bridge to nowhere and donate to IAS and maybe even get a Freedom medal ! I’m going to go and wash the grime off me now, I feel dirty and Used ! lol

  • TheHoleDoesNotExist

    I’ll buy the Exit doors for $200, alex.

    • Missionary Kid

      But there’s no knob on it, so you have to stay.

  • Chocolate Velvet

    King Kong night — uhhh, whut? Why only “clips” of the movie? Has all the entheta been removed? I’m guessing the movie treats will consist of very old candy sold at a very high mark-up; you know, for fun! Just like at the movies!

    I imagine this will be more like one of those PBS fundraisers. They’ll show a clip, and then spend two hours shilling for donations “so we can get back to the movie”. Sounds like a good time for the whole family.

    • DMSTCC

      The APA Annual Convention is in Honolulu, Hawaii (July 31-August 4, 2013). However, their Annual Meeting is in San Francisco, CA (May 18-22, 2013).

      So, will they be emptying out the cadet orgs to wear their stupid anti-Phych t-shirts again? I see some great opportunities there. I hope some annons can infiltrate the C0$ protest to get some data on what they’re saying when they’re not shouting their ill-informed hate propaganda.

      • 1subgenius

        I believe its the psychologists in Hawai’i

        and the psychiatrists in SF

    • Ms. B. Haven

      At least with PBS and NPR you get something for your money and you can turn it off any time you want to if you don’t like what you hear…

      • Chocolate Velvet

        Agreed. I just hate it when I see a great program listed, I tune in eager to watch, and then 20 minutes in they start with the fundraising breaks. A necessary thing, I know, but it ruins the program for me.

  • DMSTCC

    Marisa Nichols seems to tower over that podium compared to COB. She’s listed as 5’4″

    • BuryTheNuts2

      If I had to guess…I think that pic was taken on the freewinds. Something about that podium and the backdrop screams creepy OT VIII cruise ship to me.
      It has that “shrunken” sort of “mini me” quality that you see on cruise ships.

    • Missionary Kid

      Slime doesn’t stack very high.

  • If anyone has 200 please give them a door. And give them the name Xavier E. Numan.

    • BuryTheNuts2

      BAAHAAHAAA. So wrong it is right.

  • TheHoleDoesNotExist

    Would love to hear some of our resident E-psychologists to interpret Andrea’s subliminal admissions. Maybe instead of doors we can buy these patients a Clue.

    • BuryTheNuts2

      Paging Chocolate Velvet….

      • Chocolate Velvet

        My considered professional opinion, when Tony first posted this video, was that she is a dingbat. Officially: Dingbatisstic Personality Disorder, or DPD. I forget what the diagnostic code for that is. 😉

        Seriously, watching these testimonials makes the therapist in me sad for these folks. It is terribly obvious that she is desperate to do well at telling someone what they want to hear, but that she doesn’t believe.

        The tells are too numerous to iterate; the awkward language and inadvertent honesty are just a part of it. Her confused and tentative way of speaking is not convincing, because it says that she herself is not convinced.

        I always feel uncomfortable on behalf of these scilons when I see them “attest”. I know how much pressure there is to make it sound good, and I assume these folks are well aware of the bullshit but are caught in a double-bind that they have yet to resolve.

        You are witnessing another human being, struggling with their blind spots and their unhealthy attachments. I think everyone can relate to it on that level.

        • BuryTheNuts2

          Dingbatisstic Personality Disorder!

          Is that going to be in DSM-V?
          Because I think it needs to be.
          Can we petition them for one more category?
          We can use Elena’s Videos as our argument.

          I know they are trying to be succinct, but some things just scream “special”.
          And Elena is special all right!

        • TheHoleDoesNotExist

          Thanks. I vacillate myself between sad and mad.ng, no matter how nervously, have got to be close to collapsing soon.

        • Missionary Kid

          Diagnostic code: 666

  • Also, “Clips from King Kong” really?

    We’re going to take back the planet! Destroy the psychs! But first, here’s two minutes of unrelated stop motion animation.

    Are they trying to say that they’re King Kong? If so, Kong abducts a woman, terrorizes a city, then dies.

    Are they trying to say psychiatry is King Kong? If so, the end result is usually everyone agreeing it was a bad idea to kill King Kong cause he was just misunderstood.

    Are they trying to say that they’re Ann? Ann is a talentless out of work actress only wanted for her body that spends the entire movie being abducted exploited and attacked.

    Or do they just want to watch a movie cause there’s not much left for them to say and they’d like to fill some airtime.

    • FistOfXenu

      I think they’re trying to say “you want to talk about people dying in Narconon? you want to talk about David “he’s not insane!” Miscavige beating up his staff and making his wife disappear? you want to talk about the Hole? you want to talk about how ideal orgs are all in never-never land? OOH LOOK! THERE’S A GORILLA!”

  • BosonStark

    Girls, when you’re looking for a guy, don’t just ask his credit score when you first meet — ask how tall he is!

    Really, you don’t want a short little fuck that you’re towering over and your boobs keep running into his face, unless he has a Napoleon complex and wants to buy Florida and rule the world — then go for it. Remember though, there’s no way he’s going to get any taller just because he’s rich.

    Grant Cardone finished college with an accounting major, but he thought he was in divinity school. “Blessed be the dollar, and the holy credit score.” He really captures the purity of Scientology. If poor people weren’t so susceptible to fleecing, I’m sure he’d want them disposed of quietly, without sorrow, once they’re tapped out.

    Really, they should make it a law that men shouldn’t even be allowed to date unless they are worth at least a million, and at least 5’9″ tall too.

    • Observer

      Snort! 5’9″ is still shorter than I am. I propose 6′ and $10 million.

      Kind of hypocritical of me, I guess, since my husband is 5’7″ and had zip when we got married. And here we are, still married after 18 years …

      I obviously have nothing against short men, but poor Davey’s got such a bad case of Short Man Syndrome that he’s an irresistible target. Oh, and he’s evil.

      • BuryTheNuts2

        My husband is nice and tall and he has a great credit score.
        He has zero income, but he is the most awesome house husband ever.
        After we got married I bought him a comb and pan and a cat.
        He has been content ever since.

        • I chortled at that one.

        • Observer

          No frills?

          • BuryTheNuts2

            I offered frills…but he rejected them for madras shorts and fishing shirts.

            • Ze Moo

              What, no bowling shirts??

            • BuryTheNuts2

              Bowling shirts are a dealbreaker!

          • Missionary Kid

            He gets to sleep with her. Sorry, couldn’t resist that old nugget.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              That is “thrills” silly.

            • Missionary Kid

              I meant “nugget” as in classic retort. I should have been more explicit because I meant it as a compliment. The lucky guy!

            • BuryTheNuts2

              Well thank you and I knew you weren’t calling me an old nugget….lol.
              My husband calls me MEOW. mean.evil.old.woman.

            • Missionary Kid

              Wow. Tha;t sure is catty! 😉

            • BuryTheNuts2

              rimshot!

            • FistOfXenu

              But he means it as a term of affection right? Like when TC and DM call each other – uh, never mind.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              He better! And EeeW….

      • blissfulldreams

        i’m 5’2 so rich short men are ok for me so send them my way we can go half half on the billions and your all invited to the wedding with a cliff sea view

    • Still_On_Your_Side

      You forgot to add “Girls, Measure His ‘Thumb,’ if He has a ‘Small Thumb’ tell him’Babe, I love ya, but this ain’t gonna work.'”

      • blissfulldreams

        for his billions size would not matter that’s why toy’s was invented

    • My husband just barely squeaks past the height limit, but is nowhere near the money one. Can we make an exception if he’s great in bed?

  • BuryTheNuts2

    CCHR is going to take out Psychiatry soon eh?
    Um, they don’t seem to be making much headway…but what do I know.

    • 1subgenius

      It looks like they’re planning one of their fail protests at the upcoming APA convention in SF.

      http://www.psych.org/annualmeeting

      I got a feeling anons have plans too.
      Just noticed Bill Clinton is the keynote speaker. Irony.

      • BuryTheNuts2

        Clinton! Perfect!

        • 1subgenius

          If the scilons find out they won’t know whether to shit or go blind.

          • FistOfXenu

            They have to choose?

            • BuryTheNuts2

              I am so glad you been back around lately. You crack me up.

            • FistOfXenu

              Thanks BTN. It’s always good to be here when I can. Tony seems to collect the coolest people here doesn’t he?

        • Captain Howdy

          Bubba is going to call in that really big favor that Davey owes him. He wants a shot at some of that freaky ass space tang. Instead of cigars it’s going to be soup cans.

    • nessness

      maybe they’ll just have dinner and find out each other’s credit scores….

  • Sherbet

    Methinks the stage and lectern designs borrow heavily from Myst.

    • BuryTheNuts2

      20 year old design…yeah…that’s about right.

    • RMycroft

      They’ve always looked like a bastard offspring of Triumph of Will and Flash Gordon.

      • Artoo45

        Flash Gordon meets Triumph of the Will as interpreted by a New Jersey Mafia Wife . . .

        • richelieu jr

          With a little Holiday Inn reception area thrown inn…

          • Sherbet

            I’ve also referred to their decor of choice as “Fifty Shades of Turquoise.”

  • Ms. B. Haven

    I remember being ‘regged’ for a scientology radio station in S. Cal. back in the 80’s. It was going to have the call letters KLRH. If that would have been a sincere and successful fundraising scheme, the world would be a whole lot better off right now. That station would be on the air. There would have been a constant flow of dissemination, exciting talks and interviews, maybe some Ron’s Journal, excerpts, a perpetual plea for money to help save mankind all punctuated by interludes of Space Jazz and ‘recruitment cycles’! The public would stay away in droves. Any body router trying to drag someone into the org for a stress test would be summarily beaten. In the internet age, KLRH could have been streamed live for the entire world to experience! Where can I send money?

    • omg, can u imagine how that would have changed the public perception of the Cof$? Makes u wonder if someone figured that out and torpedoed the plan

  • that Cardone guy is a real twat …throw in the southern accent and all the hair gel …he is a pimp. i hope they do not have children …please someone tell me they just have a dog

    • Observer

      I’ve heard they have two.

      • now i feel sick

      • RMycroft

        Dogs or children? (And I’ll want a confirmed DNA test on that one.)

      • Still_On_Your_Side

        How does the church monitor births to make sure the mothers are silent? I can just see David Miscavige, Tom Cruise and Grant Cardone linking up for two new shows on the new network ” How to shut up the b***** during birth.” And another show for after the birth, “Got the Post Partum Blues? What, Are You America’s Biggest Loser? Exercise! Take Niacin! Get Off Your Ass and Stop Whining!”

    • Captain Howdy

      2 kids and at least 3 dogs.

      • BuryTheNuts2

        If this asshat has Golden Retrievers…I am reloading.

        • Captain Howdy

          Don’t you remember from IMDB ? Skeletor has 2 Great Danes plus a toy.

          • BuryTheNuts2

            Oh that’s right.

            I had a couple of Great Danes….mercifully (in this case), they don’t live that long.

            Poor things.

            • Captain Howdy

              That’s why they call the really large breeds “The heartbreak breed”

            • BuryTheNuts2

              But the poor kids have to live with those two as parents for their entire lives…
              sigh.

            • RMycroft

              No, I’m pretty sure that there have been cases of kids in the US divorcing their parents. (Oh, the biological thing. It can’t be as bad as the Innsmouth Look. Can it?)

            • Captain Howdy

              Francis Bean Cobain for one and Drew Barrymore is another I believe.

              And you get a up vote for “the Innsmouth look’ ref alone.

            • Missionary Kid

              It’s unfortunate they bred.

  • nevarmore

    Andrea ” I feel like a Bozo-the-Clown blow up toy with the wieight at the bottom.” < true words… (but not with the meaning she intended).

    • sugarplumfairy

      Wow.. And she looks like a Disney/stepford wife wind up toy with the crank at the back.. Coincidence?? I think not..

      • TheHoleDoesNotExist

        You mean she Isn’t the Disney Stepford Wife? I thought she was their leader.

        And watching Grant just now, I imagine this video is being played at the Beverly Hill Dianetics Mission’ss reception area, with all the OT Committee ladies luring in their Charity Widows, “Here’s what OT looks like…Grant, he’s the man! Oh yeah, baby”

        Just hope Andrea’s credit score is low. I don’t even wanna Think about these two breeding.

  • RMycroft

    From the pictures, Marisol Nichols looks like her legs have been cut off and she’s been plugged into a cybertronic podium. Just shove in a dollar coin and stand back!

  • Marisol seems to be demonstrating her new OT flying abilities in flying squirrel fashion. I suppose she was posing as the “T” in the “O”. I’ll leave you with the song that is now stuck in my head as a result of her picture: http://youtu.be/5akEgsZSfhg

  • N. Graham

    Exciting News! Now you will be allowed to purchase a Door Maintenance Contract for a billion years!~
    And….more exciting news! You can upgrade your door-maybe get a Clear one! Or the Ultimate, Grant Cardone Bathroom door. Sorry, no Exit doors available.

    • Missionary Kid

      You can always buy the Grant Cardone Toilet, but it costs you more for plumbing. They’ll put it in the bathroom, but without a sewer hookup or water supply. That’s extra, then you have to pay for the water, too.

  • 10oriocookies

    Even more slimy than Grant Cardone is Per Wickstrom.

    Enjoy this video.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5W6WO8M34tk

    • 10oriocookies

      Best Drug Rehab and A Forever Recovery on Ripoffreport are great reads.

      • TheHoleDoesNotExist

        So are other scientology businesses. I follow some of them. Nope, same game plan. You just Know they’ll cry to OSA who will sic the legal hounds howling religious persecution. Wake up U.S. politicians!!

        • 10oriocookies

          Let em try.

    • aquaclara

      this vid oozes with slimeball arragance. Is this drug treatment center a narconon affiliation or a scam in another guise?
      Saw the video had 13000 views. He must use this as a huge recruitment tool.

      • 10oriocookies

        Long story short: He and his ex wife ran Narconon Stone Hawk, NN Int pulled his license when I reported him for fraud and not paying around 5 million in bills while paying himself around 400k per year, I wouldnt continue to work with him as he is pretty damn good at lying to get people in the door, NN Int asked me to resign, he started A Forever Recovery and Best Drug Rehab and now he gets to use the NN program again. Except now they arent called Narconon’s.

        • aquaclara

          Big story here…love the irony of NN Int pulling his license for fraud. Guess they got over it quickly when they saw they could give him the ok for two more and rake in a few more sheckles.
          NN Int shows their zebra stripes in then asking you to resign.
          Hope you’re watching your back…there are some unfriendlies out there who clearly have few ethics as we have seen.
          Glad you’re here.

          • 10oriocookies

            My Glock w/laser sight watches my back. My M-4 with scope and laser sight watches it from afar.

            • BuryTheNuts2

              Eric, I knew I liked you right off the bat!

            • Ze Moo

              I am still a fan of 30-06. They don’t get up after a meeting with 30-06.

            • 10oriocookies

              After they lied to my wife telling her I cheated on her to get her to leave me (which wasnt true), Mr Nice Guy left the building. Im actually okay with them telling the truth about me, it will only make them look more like criminals, but when you lie about me, the 10 fold rule kicks in. Me speaking up is part of them not getting up…..

            • Captain Howdy

              Give me a DB 12 ga. w/00 and a S&W model 22 and I’m good to go.

            • 10oriocookies

              I dont wish harm on anyone or look for trouble, but fair game and harassment work both ways as far as im concerned. For a policy thats not supposed to exist, it sure seems like they renamed it or something. Heres to a peaceful resolution to our differences!

            • Eric, just be sure to carry a video camera that is ready to film at all times (in addition to your other ‘tools’). These cameras have been critical to exposing the Fair Game attempts. Besides it sometimes makes for entertainment when we get to see their completely pathetic attempts to harass (Google ‘Squirrel Busters’).

            • 10oriocookies

              I saw them, they would last about 2 minutes in my neighborhood. No neighbors to witness anything. They can film all they want, it would just be nice long videos of trees (and arrows flying into their tires from my crossbow).

        • TheHoleDoesNotExist

          Scientology attracks sociopaths like flies on shit. Sociopaths Are scientology’s Ideal Salesmen. Evidence? Per is just one of many who are still ticking. They have sci mafia protection. Most of these animals keep 3 or even 4 LLC’d businesses going, musical chair the officers, sometimes using their home addresses for more tax writeoffs. When one goes down due to bankruptcy, or customers get wise to their scam, or the authorities start snooping around, they fold and start setting up another one, different name. This way there’s at least 2 income sources going at all times.

          While Per is in the Narconon scam field, this is the sci business model (it’s not in the official Wise manuals, ha) for all the businesses. As long as scientology gets its cut, as well as Intel on customers that might come in handy, they back these sicko’s up. Sales tech is screaming, verbally and mentally abusing. You’d be surprised that not just Narconon business owners hire drug addicts. If someone can sell, they get a desk and believe me, there has been a steady parade of alcoholics and drug addicts in these businesses. Obviously, high turnover. These people do not have a conscience. Sexual harrassment is also rampant unless some wog makes an official complaint and then they go through the motions of workplace compliance and you can bet the woman gets only cold leads and colder looks until she has to leave due to no income.

          If there’s a Boxer’s Association that would be interested in what Per is up to, hope you can send them along some info and links to ReachingTheTippingPoint etcetera.

          • Captain Howdy

            Instead of being space and time travelers they’re just Travelers (gypsy crime families).

        • RMycroft

          If he’s still using Narconon Int’s tax exemption, then it doesn’t matter what he’s calling it.

          • 10oriocookies

            for profit now. Sister is the Director. Pam Anderson. Dad Doug is CFO.

      • RMycroft

        I want a deep fried turkey–but you have to do it safely.
        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8t2dwPTnsyA

      • 10oriocookies

        There are barely 13k people in the city its in. 4 people box. He sponsored some stuff at fashion week and did some interviews on camera and links them to his rehab sites also. Gets him organic placement in Google and yahoo without having to pay for adwords pay per click. He’s spends sooooooo much money on the internet to get people to come to his facilities, uses fake referral sites and has “counselors” referring soley back to his centers. Total scam.

    • 1subgenius

      http://www.cs.cmu.edu/~dst/Stop-Narconon/StoneHawk/Kate_Wickstrom/

      I need to do more to shut down Narconon in Michigan.
      I wish we had PMs here so you could get my contact info and give me some tips.

      • 10oriocookies

        One of the things Kate included in her suit was that I was specifically not allowed in the building when she came to get her stuff. She actually had her lawyers put that in there. I took her office and reported her to NN Int for falsifying stats. That’s how NN SH won the Birthday Game. I framed the document and put it on my wall. Register at the Tipping Point and we can PM. Im 10oriocookies over there too. Trust me, LOTS going on in regard to Per and NN in Mich.

      • RMycroft

        You have my axe.

  • BosonStark

    The door knob girls — $200 is pretty small donation for Scientology. It’s going to be getting people through those doors that will be the trick. Then, to keep paying the bills. They’re going to have to be pounding on members’ doors for that, when they aren’t training people to disseminate to entire countries or encouraging them to up their status with the IAS.

    In Scientology’s golden age of sell-the-con and money suckage, you could see how patrons and Org workers were motivated by the elbow-to-elbow public members who were streaming in and so eager to get processed.

    Ambiance wasn’t an issue — people were eager to get their hands on the cans and seemed to thrill at being packed in like sardines. The ambiance was the electricity in the air, of mystery and expectation. How can they expect they are going to replace that with impressive buildings, electronic displays and nicer bookstores?

    And where do people go to look for information, when they aren’t elbow-to-elbow and wonder why? How do they prevent people’s friends, neighbors, and family from looking at things on the Internet, and mentioning it to them?

    Selling people on the mysteries of the emeter will eventually be almost like trying to open a TV store where you sell black & white TV sets with tubes, but with a digital converter box. That’s how technically backward it is. As far as Xenu being a sacred secret? Please!

    • Missionary Kid

      Those are just door knobs. They don’t actually open the latch holding the door shut. Once you’re in, you can’t get out, unless you break the glass.

  • brianculkin

    I can just hear her saying with her arms wide open, “My space is this big ……”
    In actuality she is in the midst of a psychotic break after having read the EP of OT 8 “I now know what I am not and ready to find out who I am” #smh

    • BuryTheNuts2

      OT VIII just begs one to go type III.
      What an expensive way to hear the worst punchline of the lamest joke on the planet.

    • what level did you achieve Brian ?

      • BuryTheNuts2
        • WTF ???? !! This is why i get frustrated…this is why i think scientologists are just plain stupid people and actually like being that way. I mean a person has to actually make an effort to be that obtuse. And the yoga porn does not help . Face palm.

          • BuryTheNuts2

            I would definitely bake with you today except I am afraid I would go on a taco rant.

          • The lure of magical thinking is powerful to some that really want to believe in it.

    • blissfulldreams

      Arms=legs 🙂

  • Somehow I’m guessing that Grant Cardone is trying to sneak in a practical message here, but I’ve heard it told with a fuck ton more tact than this tool. He should take lessons on delivery from Suzy Orman.

    Funny how he says, “if the man don’t have caek…”

    I still completely believe that this moron has a boat load of debt.

    • richelieu jr

      But he’s a “new York Times best-selling ARTHUR!”

    • Ze Moo

      Notice that Grant didn’t check her credit score until after he had sex with her. Gotta keep those priorities straight.

  • Marisol….never heard of her. I watched a couple episodes of 24 but i find it difficult to look at Keifer Sutherland.(ugly meets stick) and when the GOP started to use his character in talking points , like he was a REAL person …i decided to serve my country and not watch it so i never saw Marisol in all her acting glory. Maybe she will get her own show on the scientology channel . Just for fun i watched the Tom Cruise meltdown with Matt Lauer …always nice to hear a man say that all you need for post partem ( it’s all in your head ) is some niacin and a little exercise

    • Captain Howdy

      The guys who created “24′ were good friends with Cheney and his pet chimp “Dubya”. that show was created specifically as propaganda for the “War on Terror”. I didn’t know it was still on as I heard Keefer quit acting to pursue a career in drunken fisticuffs with fashion designers.

      • LOL…well ..SOMEONE has to deal with those designers . Otherwise the terrorists win . Every time i read Cheney’s name …a cold chill runs down my body. Not kidding …he really creeps me out . He just oozes evil . Not crazy like Manson …but evil .

    • Still_On_Your_Side

      Hey, that’s all he needed. Katie? Katie who?

  • “Find out how we will make the APA monstrously sorry for coming to our city (San Francisco)”. That sounds like a threat to me.

    My first thought was the Mike McClaughry YT describing how an OSA operative snuck into a psych’s hotel room at a convention and put LSD in his toothpaste. And then describes how his pregnant wife was also in the hotel room. Mike claims this occurred at the San Francisco Hilton.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EoRK3O4430g
    APA, keep your toothpaste under lock and key.

    • TheHoleDoesNotExist

      Send the APA the flyer and video for a heads up.

      • BuryTheNuts2

        That is a very good idea.

        • 1subgenius

          Done.

          • BuryTheNuts2

            Did you send a copy of the flyer with the nice little threat too?

            • 1subgenius

              yes

            • TheHoleDoesNotExist

              Tks….

  • Can anyone here tell us what the details for the KCET studio were (that were announced at the New Years event)? Those of us Angelinos that were devastated by the loss of this iconic studio to the cult have been wondering what they will do with this space.

    • richelieu jr

      I used to work there and it breaks my heart.

    • SP ‘Onage

      They’re working on turning us into a Clearwater, Florida. *sigh*

  • I’d go to King Kong night, to hear how CCHR FINALLY plans to destroy the psychs, and make them “monstrously sorry” for holding their convention in San Francisco. I might have to go up there again for this. Last time the APA had their convention in SF, anons made it into pure street theater, enturbulating the clams and scaring psychiatric pedestrians.

    • Still_On_Your_Side

      Are they nuts? Well, yes. They are threatening conventioneers. The “we will make them sorry” threat is the same one used by Bin Laden, and before him, terrorists such as the Bader Meinhoff Gang, the Red Brigade, the SLA ( in San Francisco), the Weather Underground and so on. So much for Miscavige’s rapid quest for “respectability.”

    • Captain Howdy

      Some Anon should hijack the scilon van (with them in it) and drive it down to Castro St. and abandon them there.

  • Still_On_Your_Side

    It’s official, Grant Cardone is a horse’s ass. Ask every date for their credit score…after all it’s the same as going into business. What else, oh yes, I am sure he asked his dates for their bust size. “Hey Dudes, at some point in the relationship, this is going to be an issue, so ask it up front, and if she says ’34(a),” tell her ‘babe, I love you, but this ain’t gonna work.'” This is what Scientology teaches? Find your “soul mate” ( hey, Andrea Doven’s words, not mine) by asking for his/ her credit score? Now I know why Miscavige got rid of Shelley, her credit acore was too low!

    Well, according to this bozo, a whole bunch of successful business and political leaders should never have married their spouses, because they were poor when they married and their marriages were based on love and character. This video is a new low.

    • villagedianne

      A guy I know was in a restaurant on a first date. During the meal she asked him, “So. . . Steve, . . what is your net worth?”. They finished the meal, he paid the tab, and never asked her out again.

      • Captain Howdy

        What an idiot…you’re suppose to wait until they’re asleep and look for their bank statement and other pertinent paper work, sheesh !

        • Or this.

        • Still_On_Your_Side

          No, you are supposed to pay for an illegal background and credit check from one of Miscavige’s PIs. Jeez Cardone, how thick are you? You actually ask her for her credit score? Hasn’t Davey taught you anything? Now you are going to have a whole lot of trouble finding your second, third, fourth and fifth wives because they are going to lie to you about their credit scores.

      • Nooo, that’s a trick question! You’re supposed to wax all philosophical and lyrical about the many things in the world that are more important than money!
        *if these were two $cientologists out to dinner, does not apply*

    • BuryTheNuts2

      In the name of all the horses on the face of the earth………..I am offended!

      • Ze Moo

        The cows take offense too. Hell, all hay eating critters have more self respect and humility then the Cardones. I include the Llamas too, though many Llamas are asses. The Asses, strangely enough are not that bad.

        • BuryTheNuts2

          Llamas are spitters! They are Cardones!

  • A Valentines-ish event 9 days after Valentine’s Day? Sounds exciting!

    • Roger Larsson

      Rabbits are more successful to expand as a group than scientologists.

      The training routines knocks out human emotions and reactions. How can the ones unable to react act?

  • OK, I’m ready to do a knob! Wait, that doesn’t sound right.

    • SP ‘Onage

      You can get a cheaper $75.00 dollar door knob on Hollywood Blvd…so they say. Heh!

  • mook

    some interesting updates from around the web:

    Jenna Miscavige was on Coast to Coast AM Radio yesterday
    http://www.forum.exscn.net/showthread.php?30685-Jenna-Miscaviage-Hill-on-Coast-to-Coast-AM

    Roger Friedman reveals that the CoS front group Artists for Human Rights (headed by Tommy Davis’s mother Anne Archer) has not filed a federal tax form since 2009.
    http://www.forum.exscn.net/showthread.php?30658-%93Fatal-Attraction%94-Actress-Leading-Scientologist-Hosting-Pow-Wow

    remember the guy who donated his entire LRH collection to a San Diego library? He’s been accused of rape in the past
    http://ocmb.xenu.net/ocmb/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=220180

    clueless CoS parent denies the Delphi Org is linked to the cult.
    http://ocmb.xenu.net/ocmb/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=224006

    one of Jesse Prince’s former friends, who’s now in the NOI, inquires about CoS on Facebook and gets an overwhelming response. somebody should get him to meet Leila Wills..
    https://whyweprotest.net/community/threads/nation-of-islam-member-joins-the-discussion.109310/

    does anybody have contact info about this Phoenix, AZ charter school using LRH study tech?
    https://whyweprotest.net/community/threads/school-in-phoenix-uses-hubbard-tech.109227/

  • Trustmeonthis

    Is Marisol standing on a box behind that podium? o.O

    • mouseyhair

      I thought the same thing the first time I looked at that picture! I know I am new to all this Co$ watching but it sure looks like she is standing on a box or something! Is it possible those podiums are built that short for the “tiny terror” so he always appears the right height?? Would make sense, or she is over 6 feet tall. Just sayin’.

      • Trustmeonthis

        That’s what I’m thinking… compare to photos of Miss Cabbage at the podium. 😉

  • CardoneCon

    Cross posted from WWP –

    If anyone wants to see where the lovely Mr. & Mrs. Cardone actually live, here you go:

    http://losangeles.blockshopper.com/property/5560006017/1401_oriole/

    I’m not quite sure what kind of financial dealings went on with this property, but something doesn’t see right.

    1. House first sold to Cardone on 4/18/2003 for $7.5 million.
    2. Cardone probably quick claim deeds his wife (Elena) on the property at some point between 2003 and 2012 because her name shows as on the title on 2/1/2012.
    3. There probably was a refinance done on 2/1/2012 or some other title transfer

    But then….you look at this site:
    http://www.zillow.com/homedetails/1401-Oriole-Dr-Los-Angeles-CA-90069/20799199_zpid/

    The property shows as sold on 8/24/12 for $17 million. Blockshopper does not record another title transfer so I’m confused as to how Zillow shows this property as sold for for an amount that is much, much higher than this property was worth even at the top of the housing bubble (in 2007 it was estimated only at $14 million). Cardone listed it for sale in 2011 for $18 million and then took it off the market when there were no buyers.

    I know it takes awhile before title transfers in a sale actually hit the Blockshopper site, but something here doesn’t add up. I also know that, like just about everything related to Hollywood, the real estate in the Hollywood Hills operate in a bubble and often isn’t impacted by other housing trends. But how can this house have increased 44% in a lackluster housing market? Could he have done that many improvements to the property?

    My ‘scam’ radar is going off here, but maybe I’m off base……does anyone know?

    • Maybe he sold it to a closely-held corporation that he owns for an inflated price for the corporate tax write-off?

      • Ze Moo

        Ricardo Montalban used to live next door. Why don’t they have one of those ‘patron maximus glutious’ trophies on the fireplace?

    • ParticleMom

      Maybe they remortgaged it for the amount some upstanding appraiser claimed it was worth. That would lead me to believe that they don’t handle their money as well as they claim.

  • Scratching my head about why a Valentine’s-themed event is scheduled 8 days later.

  • Captain Howdy

    Tony, is the OU being ddosed ?. I’ve been having accelerating problems connecting over the last few weeks.

    • SP ‘Onage

      Yeah, glad you mentioned it. Off and on I keep getting a ‘500 Internal Server Error’ message and can’t connect to this site, says to contact owner of website. Somethings going on with the web site’s server maybe? Or something?

      • BuryTheNuts2

        Ditto here. On all devices.

        • SP ‘Onage

          Ya think it’s sumtin nefarious? Or just tinfoil?

          • BuryTheNuts2

            It could definitely be tinfoil interference on my part!

          • Naw, I think Tony is just getting more popular than the server expected.

        • Observer

          Ditto that ditto. And ditto.

      • Yup, me too.

        • TheHoleDoesNotExist

          Me too.

    • Jenna’s site, Ex-Scientology Kids is down too. Take out the tin foil.

      http://exscientologykids.com/

  • V for Vacation

    Regarding the Valley video, one of the ladies says they “…have the biggest ideal org property on planet Earth right now.” Is 11455 Burbank Blvd 91601 in North Hollywood really the biggest ideal org property?? It’s not that large, and definitely doesn’t have any historical landmark glamour or value of some of CoS’s other recent acquisitions.

    Google maps has the wrong address location for it, it’s actually across the street to the west, and you can see a big Christian cross in the satellite image of the building, because I think it used to be a Baptist church? I’ll probably go check it out in person again soon. This North Hollywood church was where the Valley Org was sort of slyly and bizarrely hosting “Friday Food Truck” nights last year in the parking lot across the street, which I went to. There was no dissemination of any kind, disappointingly, and the whole environment was sad and pathetic. And by “hosting”, I assume they just called and asked the food trucks to come. None of the food was provided as a complimentary lure to get people to look at / listen to any CoS info. I could only assume at the time that they recently acquired the property and were making a small gesture to any locals that might be giving them the fish eye.

    This neighborhood is pretty run-down and lower middle class, with a large percent of Latino Catholics/Christians. Who is walking into CoS doors off the street these days? Does anyone know? I know the ideal org situation is basically a real estate scam / pyramid scheme / diversion tactic / whatever. But Scientology is not something that is considered or discussed in contemporary culture (anywhere on Earth?) unless it is gossip or mockery attached to scandals or celebrities. Besides those born into it, who are their new clients? I suppose I’m wondering what these women who are working to build the ideal orgs are telling themselves. Do they just want to strive for “Saint Hill size” to clear the planet and get super powers, or do they think that if they build an ideal org more new people off the street will be awestruck come in, or do they just want a nicer place for themselves and their own existing congregation? Or do they just not have a choice and are blindly following orders?

    If you can afford to give thousands of dollars to CoS, then you probably live in a much, much nicer part of the San Fernando Valley. And if you live in a nice neighborhood and drive a nice car and wear nice clothes and consider yourself to be a superior being various exciting ways… then the grody corner of Burbank and Lankershim in the chain-link fence / stray dogs / liquor store + payday advance check cashing part of NoHo is not where you want to travel to spend quality time moving up the bridge to total fooldom. I can’t believe that after so many years reading about and witnessing CoS antics, I still get confounded by the little things.

    • Missionary Kid

      If you go to the actual location you described in Google Earth Street View, as well as from the air, Co$ – Valley Org. shows up. They probably bought the building because it has an auditorium as well as offices and Sunday School rooms that will suffice for auditing. It also probably adds to the little credibility that they have as a church. I’ll bet they sell the conversion of the cross to the Stinkology sign to some poor clam for big bucks.

      In street view, it looks like the parking lot is being repaved. That’s the location that Google Earth sends you to when you enter the address.

  • wannabeclear

    I was going to post something long and profound, but after watching that video with Grant Cardone, best selling arther (dude, learn how to pronounce your title), I desperately need to take a long, cleansing shower. That shit made me feel really icky.

  • Lovers of theta (made-up shit), chocolate, good friends, and an Ideal Org, but NOT for lovers in the traditional sense. Romantic and sexual love is just too damned hard to control. You might want to be allowed to spend time with the one you love instead of working day and night thousands of miles away. You might want to build a life together, instead of giving every last cent to Scientology. And when Scientology tells you to kick out your beloved because she or he is injured or sick, you might rebel.

    And not for people who love their families, either. Again: too hard to control.

    • BuryTheNuts2

      Those darn human emotions and reactions!
      How have we wogs ever survived?
      Just think of all the crazy decisions we have made in the name of love and compassion.

      press here.

      • SP ‘Onage

        LOL!

  • I love the line “Get the date on how CCHR plans to take out Psychiatry soon.”

    They have been saying that forever and still, like zombies with their arms stretched out in front of them, they show up at these events and give them every cent they have and then some. They never think to ask why the last several decades of the dedicated “Psychiatry: Global Obliteration” campaign has done NOTHING let alone ask why Scientology is so against psychiatry (but that’s a little too advanced to expect).

    If one feels like a Bozo the Clown blow up toy after spending half a million dollars to learn the secrets of the universe, one might not want to obliterate psychiatry. Know what I’m sayin’? 😉

    • SP ‘Onage

      I have really bad coulrophobia (fear of clowns) that’s why I dislike Freedom Mag’s shill journalist, Jim Lynch. 😉

      • BuryTheNuts2

        Ditto on the clown fear.
        Mook’s AV makes me insane.

  • A world full of Grant Cardone types would be bereft of anything deeper than a cookie sheet. There would be no real art, music, theater, dance, etc. It would a universe of kitsch, of tinsel, of grotesque statues on the lawn, and mutual admiration societies of competing, fist-pounding, testosterone-laden FICO scores. Though Grant sees himself as a giant on top of his game, he has a very long road ahead of him.

    If the man ever had to take personal inventory and really examine his shallow behavior and obnoxious persona, it would be quite sobering indeed. It may be too much for that ego to handle.

    The fall of the C of S will not deter this man. He was a narcissist before he ever set foot inside the cult. He’s in it for the power and glory. No, he would throw Scientology under the bus as “losers” and jump onto some other bandwagon to push his wares and greedy materialistic viewpoint.

    The cult is just a vehicle for this egomaniac. If there was no longer a ready made audience of suckers to look up to him and buy his seminars, he would have to find that audience elsewhere, and would.

    • SP ‘Onage

      For a good laugh. Check out Cardone’s Valentine video with his wife. The guy is a loser!

      Millionaire Matchmaker

      http://youtu.be/h-kCDwIgmUY

      • Observer

        I want to, but I’m askeered …

      • Wow. I could only get half way through before I had to turn it off. Elena moved up a few notches in my book there. I think she’s just been horribly corrupted. 🙂 lol

      • BuryTheNuts2

        Good God Man….
        Barf Warnings please!

  • ParticleMom

    The Sunday Funnies are always entertaining, but this was overflowing with lulz. You always make me more happier, Tony.

  • Makes me titter that these oh-so-smug-and-spiritually-aware Scientolgists are totally oblivious to the fact that they are continually surrounded by occult symbols and sigils and are therefore being used in the practice of magick whether they realise it or not. So, not then. It’s a testament to how well the spell is working I suppose. It’s mind control right out of North Korea, complete with a dictionary of trigger words. A ‘cage for the mind’ as Crowley says.

    Look at the symbolism of the podium. Hypnotic right? Note she is mirroring the symbol. (reinforcement) Stands under an arch. Representing the sun. Note the symbolism of the Ouroboros snake eating its own tail behind her. This symbolizes the cyclic Nature of the Universe and is a well known symbol in Paganism generally.

    And dare I say it, is the podium suggestive of an M or what? Her gesture there is also a freemasonic signal by the way. Bet you’ve never heard that before about Scientology. And yes there is a very deep Masonic connection here. Naval intelligence? Hello!

    LRH was a high occultist initiate (meaning he took a vow) and a member of the OTO. His name is in the book at the Pasadena OTO HQ. Check it out. Ask them why there’s a CIA training drill called “Dear Alice”.

    Back to the point: The OT symbol is the Tau Cross. Meaning “cross,” and is the final letter of the Hebrew alphabet. It is numbered 300 in the Greek and 400 in the Hebrew numerical alphabet. The tau corresponds astrologically with the planet Saturn and the concept of finality.

    Therefore Scientology is sun worship, as are all religions. Just look at their symbolism. It’s all about Illumination. There’s even a dawn sky behind Marisol there and dawn/sunset skies and suns sparkling from behind planet earth are a common symbol in Scientology marketing and imagery. Which is pretty much all marketing. Their name is Golden Era for heck sake, a Theosophical theme referring to The Golden Age of Aquarius, which we are now in.

    .What you’re seeing here in magical terms is enchantment in action. She is being used to enchant the viewers right back into ponying up more dough. And that’s what Scientology uses to cast its spell on the punters. And until they realise that they’ll keep chasing that carrot Marisol will shortly realise does not exist.

  • VS

    Such a bummer about Marisol. She was my first & closest friend when I moved to Chicago in 1993. We were together during the OJ chase (along with her new puppy Also a ton the time) & when Princess Di was killed. She was cool, fun & a great friend. Not to mention that she’s beautiful, swore like a sailor & could beat anyone in a game of pool. Once she moved to Hollywood & got wrapped up in this mumbo jumbo, she stopped being involved with her non-enlightened friends. WTF happened?!? I’d love to punch Scientology in its stupid face. And I’d like to shake the shit out of Marisol.