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Sunday Funnies: Scientology Needs Your Cash!

Once again our tipsters have come through for us this week, and we have another diverting set of Scientology fundraising mailers for our Sunday Funnies.

We’re counting on our formidable commenting community to analyze, synthesize, and deconstruct these latest dispatches from David Miscavige’s leaky barge of a church.

Is there a common theme running through them? We’ll let you decide.

 

We’re going to start with this celebration of the Ishmaels, who have just forked over a huge sum of money to help build a new Ideal Org in Chicago. And why did they do it? Get this, because it was “the only logical thing to do.” Hey, when you put it that way, where’s my checkbook!

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Look what’s happening today! Scientology’s teen-recruitment front group, Youth for Human Rights, is holding a kid roundup on Hollywood Boulevard. Hide your emotionally troubled youngster!

 
This next flier gives us a thought. Why didn’t Scientology’s OT VIIIs gather in some kind of theta-circle and postulate away the recession a couple of years ago?

 
Another in the series that shows current staff members in Los Angeles. And hey, Dan is looking pretty happy. Maybe he just blew off some charge?

 
Overworked? Overwhelmed? Just imagine how much better your life will be with Scientology staff bugging the crap out of you for thousand-dollar donations every other day. Talk about efficiency!

 
We have a feeling only John P. is going to make any sense of what is meant by “2000” in this next one. But hey, it’s exciting to see Scientology announce a new crusade. The last one was announced hours and hours ago.

Hey tipsters, thanks for another set of mailers. Keep ’em coming!

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