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Scientology leader David Miscavige turns 57 today — what’s your birthday greeting?

 
On April 30, 1960, David Miscavige and his twin sister Denise were born in Bucks County, Pennsylvania. Today they turn 57, and we thought you’d want to wish the Church of Scientology’s ecclesiastical grand poobah a happy birthday.

Over the years, based on various pieces of circumstantial evidence, we’ve come to the conclusion that Scientology’s leader secretly loves this website. We’re pretty sure that he’s a daily reader, and he watches the comments as much as anyone does.

So, for that reason, we thought we ought to give you an opportunity to send Dave a message. Today, as he turns 57, what are your thoughts?

Personally, as someone just a few years behind him, we think Dave looks pretty terrific for his age. Sure, have at his poofy pompadour if you must, but this is a guy who must spend a lot of time in the gym, and doesn’t go out in public unless he’s dressed to the nines. And sure, he may be a bit challenged in the vertical direction, but Dave makes up for an altitudinal disadvantage by ruling the people around him with an iron fist.

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For more than 30 years now, he’s had an outsized presence in the lives of thousands of Scientologists. Some of them, workers in the Sea Organization, will have spent several weeks going without pay so they could pool enough money to buy Dave a nice gift. Any guesses what they gave him this year?

OK, everyone together now: Hip, hip, hooray!

 

 
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Countdown to Denver!

 

 
HowdyCon 2017: Denver, June 23-25 at the Residence Inn Denver City Center. Go here to start making your plans, and book your room soon!

 
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Scientology disconnection, a reminder

Bernie Headley has not seen his daughter Stephanie in 4,736 days.
Quailynn McDaniel has not seen her brother Sean in 1,839 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 2,333 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 1,373 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy in 1,085 days.
Marie Bilheimer has not seen her mother June in 611 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 4,700 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 1,840 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 2,160 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 2,135 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 491 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin in 4,793 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 900 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis for 1,302 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 1,175 days.
Lois Reisdorf has not seen her son Craig in 756 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike in 1,261 days.
Mary Jane Sterne has not seen her daughter Samantha in 1,505 days.
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 12,614 days.

 
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3D-UnbreakablePosted by Tony Ortega on April 30, 2017 at 13:40

E-mail tips and story ideas to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We post behind-the-scenes updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.

Our book, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information about the book, and our 2015 book tour, can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.

The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2016 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Undergound Bunker (2012-2016), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)

Learn about Scientology with our numerous series with experts…

BLOGGING DIANETICS: We read Scientology’s founding text cover to cover with the help of L.A. attorney and former church member Vance Woodward
UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists
GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice
SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts

Other links: Shelly Miscavige, ten years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | Scientology’s Private Dancer | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | Scientology boasts about assistance from Google | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ

Our Guide to Alex Gibney’s film ‘Going Clear,’ and our pages about its principal figures…
Jason Beghe | Tom DeVocht | Sara Goldberg | Paul Haggis | Mark “Marty” Rathbun | Mike Rinder | Spanky Taylor | Hana Whitfield

 

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