Hahahahha Meepthorp..Hilarious..haha

I hope I didn’t give you the impression that I was comparing myself to other Tortured souls.. the Creative Geniuses of the world. Just me. But when I read the link I thought.. OMG..

I thought I was the only one. Yes it was like Forrest Gump who Ran until he stopped..and didn’t want to run anymore..ha..

I am sorry for your dark passages Max.. but look at you now. It is amazing how struggles make us strong.. and what the human mind can endure. smooches.. baby

Yes, I get it now. It is an incredible thing. That when it’s over, it is o ver.

:->)

Wouldn’t trade the last 45 years for nothing either is right, Kiddo. I ‘never’ ever believed I’d get thru all the trauma — not the death of a twin, but my own dark passages — to the extent I have. Am enjoying life as never before. Who knew? that it could happen? A basic contentment with life and who we are …

Thank Meepthorp ! hahahahahahahaha 🙂

“Yes, dear heart — I was gorgeous/handsome too — youth ‘is’ wasted on the young.”
…………………………………………..

Hahahha.. Well, all we have to do is close our eyes and we will see ourselves again..

I wouldn’t trade what I have learned in the last 40 years for anything! ( and I’m sure you wouldn’t either..)
………..
Max..It is weird.. and I don’t know how to explain it.. I needed to get absolutely lost in my art.. My brain would just turn off the pain and I would put my hand on the brush and I wouldn’t stop for days..

and when I was finished I was absolutely emotionally and physically drained. I would have 4-5 canvases going on at once.. Once I was done with a painting I couldn’t believe that I created it.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/christopher-zara/tortured-artists_b_1605509.html

Amazing, kiddo. That your talent is connected so to your therapeutic need to deal w/ the trauma of losing your sister. And that it doesn’t stand alone as something you love to do as you.

I imagine similar has happened to others, yet yours is the 1st I’ve ever heard. I get it tho’, who needs it anymore… not you, is your answer. That is good.

Yes, dear heart — I was gorgeous/handsome too — youth ‘is’ wasted on the young. :-/

No.. I did the FB route..and it didn’t work out for me. But thank you anyway..xoxoxox

OMG.. I love you.. Awwww so sweet of you.. Oh Youth IS wasted on the young..eh?

You know Max.. My art is so personal to me. I worked myself through the grief of my twin.. I was obsessed..I painted around the clock. Never had formal training.

I just woke up as an artist one day after praying for peace .. Jude came to me and told me to” do something with my life.”

So for 4 years I painted hundreds..sold in galleries, on line.. art shows.. just 24/7 and then one day.. I had 10 consignment orders and I said to my husband..

” I’m done. ” Haven’t picked up a brush since. I have no desire to..It is weird. I can’t explain it.. It’s like I’m back to living again. It was an escape for me.

A month ago a new gallery contacted me to display and sell my art again. I went with a friend to see what it was about..and half way through the presentation…I excused myself and said to my friend..

” I can NOT go through that again..I can NOT go backwards. My painting was such a therapeutic experience that I put my heart and soul into ..I just can’t do it again..

I left a part of me in each work. I continue to get asked to paint something.. and I can’t.. I know it sounds crazy.. and it is I guess.. I just can’t tap into that creative frenzy of release again..

I can’t paint for the fun of it…or the $ side of it.. It is either all of me or none of me..

Maybe one day.. when I have to take that journey again through pain.. I don’t know.. thank you so much for your compliments. They mean the world to me. xoxox love baby

ooops. This one (I meant to attach) https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/56d0843bb000ac18f63d4b38a00b8da9293b561eab2c877a6d846243c8af8d88.jpg

and I really love your art. (This one is very cool 🙂 I hope you are painting and showing in Galleries and selling things! You are so talented and people ‘love’ your work. I recall you saying that you don’t have any canvases anymore, only pictures of some of your work…. Do I have that right? Kid- you ‘have to’ paint and sell your work! No ?

Plus I have wanted to say to you since you posted it, that picture of you in the lavender bikini, how gorgeous you looked. Dear heart, you stunned! In the sun! 🙂

Okay, kiddo:) Are you on Facebook? I’ll send you an invite 🙂

Max..first I love your avi.. I had one with signature and one without.. I thought Fuck it..

They know who I am.. I’ve been outed a couple of times..and when I go to Clearwater..Ohhh they come looking for us.. xoxo You are so sweet.. thank you honey..