For the fifth year in a row, Scientology is airing a slick new ad during the Super Bowl. As in past years, the ad airs during local time slots and only in certain cities. While the national ads aired during the game are costing about $5 million for a thirty-second spot, Scientology’s strategy ends up costing about $1 million, experts have told us.
We’ll be watching reactions on Twitter and in our comments to get some idea as to which cities Scientology leader David Miscavige chose to see the ad. A couple of years ago, he announced that cities that had opened “Ideal Orgs” would get the ads, but last year we didn’t see any particular pattern to which cities were chosen.
As for the ad itself, it follows Scientology’s usual “mystery sandwich” style, making only vague statements to create a mood without saying anything about how Scientology actually works.
This year’s felt like a rehash of images from its older ads with some new narration. In other words, it seemed pretty weak.
Here’s the 1-minute version…
Here’s the narration for the longer 1-minute version…
There are words to describe every step we take
Words for the joy
And the sorrow
And the triumphs
The defeat that pushes us into the shadows
And the inspiration that brings us back
But through all of life’s journey
There’s no language adequate to describe
The ultimate heights you can attain…
Your full potential
And Scientology has already begun putting together memes based on it…
We’re curious to see how the ad fares this year in the wake of Leah Remini’s A&E series, Scientology and the Aftermath. We’re watching Twitter for the best reactions.
Wow. That scientology commercial made me want to gag more than the Humpty Dumpty one. #SuperBowl
— Neil Richard (@thetk42one) February 5, 2017
— stephanie latoski (@slatoski3) February 5, 2017
Scientology roots for the Patriots. pic.twitter.com/q4i9jTQbEt
— Tom Sauer (@remhuck) February 5, 2017
Travolta and his Scientology just jinxed the @Patriots
— Wrench (@auggie_dicester) February 5, 2017
Seriously the church of Scientology is FREAKING OUT since Leah Remini's series. They're pushing commercials more than ever
— kristin loucks (@kristinnlynn) February 5, 2017
I FORGOT ABOUT THE ANNUAL SCIENTOLOGY SUPER BOWL COMMERCIAL.
— Sage Young (@abrighteryellow) February 5, 2017
— Nathan Greenberg (@NathanGreenberg) February 5, 2017
[Actual advertising executive.]
Saw a Scientology commercial and I can't wait to join! So much love & peace!
— 🗣 MATEO (@CHBMatt) February 5, 2017
— Brad Walker (@bradswalker) February 6, 2017
— Craig (@CraigGrobstich) February 6, 2017
HowdyCon 2017: Denver, June 23-25. Go here to start making your plans.
Scientology disconnection, a reminder
Bernie Headley has not seen his daughter Stephanie in 4,654 days.
Claudio and Renata Lugli have not seen their son Flavio in 2,251 days.
Sara Goldberg has not seen her daughter Ashley in 1,290 days.
Lori Hodgson has not seen her son Jeremy in 1,003 days.
Joe Reaiche has not seen his daughter Alanna Masterson in 4,588 days
Derek Bloch has not seen his father Darren in 1,758 days.
Cindy Plahuta has not seen her daughter Kara in 2,078 days.
Claire Headley has not seen her mother Gen in 2,053 days.
Ramana Dienes-Browning has not seen her mother Jancis in 409 days.
Mike Rinder has not seen his son Benjamin in 4,711 days.
Brian Sheen has not seen his daughter Spring in 818 days.
Skip Young has not seen his daughters Megan and Alexis for 1,220 days.
Mary Kahn has not seen her son Sammy in 1,093 days.
Phil and Willie Jones have not seen their son Mike in 1,179 days.
Mary Jane Sterne has not seen her daughter Samantha in 1,423 days..
Kate Bornstein has not seen her daughter Jessica in 12,532 days.
E-mail tips and story ideas to tonyo94 AT gmail DOT com or follow us on Twitter. We post behind-the-scenes updates at our Facebook author page. After every new story we send out an alert to our e-mail list and our FB page.
Our book, The Unbreakable Miss Lovely: How the Church of Scientology tried to destroy Paulette Cooper, is on sale at Amazon in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook versions. We’ve posted photographs of Paulette and scenes from her life at a separate location. Reader Sookie put together a complete index. More information about the book, and our 2015 book tour, can also be found at the book’s dedicated page.
The Best of the Underground Bunker, 1995-2016 Just starting out here? We’ve picked out the most important stories we’ve covered here at the Undergound Bunker (2012-2016), The Village Voice (2008-2012), New Times Los Angeles (1999-2002) and the Phoenix New Times (1995-1999)
Learn about Scientology with our numerous series with experts…
BLOGGING DIANETICS: We read Scientology’s founding text cover to cover with the help of L.A. attorney and former church member Vance Woodward
UP THE BRIDGE: Claire Headley and Bruce Hines train us as Scientologists
GETTING OUR ETHICS IN: Jefferson Hawkins explains Scientology’s system of justice
SCIENTOLOGY MYTHBUSTING: Historian Jon Atack discusses key Scientology concepts
Other links: Shelly Miscavige, ten years gone | The Lisa McPherson story told in real time | The Cathriona White stories | The Leah Remini ‘Knowledge Reports’ | Hear audio of a Scientology excommunication | Scientology’s little day care of horrors | Whatever happened to Steve Fishman? | Felony charges for Scientology’s drug rehab scam | Why Scientology digs bomb-proof vaults in the desert | PZ Myers reads L. Ron Hubbard’s “A History of Man” | Scientology’s Master Spies | Scientology’s Private Dancer | The mystery of the richest Scientologist and his wayward sons | Scientology’s shocking mistreatment of the mentally ill | Scientology boasts about assistance from Google | The Underground Bunker’s Official Theme Song | The Underground Bunker FAQ
Our Guide to Alex Gibney’s film ‘Going Clear,’ and our pages about its principal figures…
Jason Beghe | Tom DeVocht | Sara Goldberg | Paul Haggis | Mark “Marty” Rathbun | Mike Rinder | Spanky Taylor | Hana Whitfield